Christmas ended with everyone tired but happy.

A few surprises here and there, to be sure.

Gambit attempted to pacify Rogue from before by telling her not to worry about what Emma said.

Rogue said she wasn't worried about that, just didn't like it.

"You know Gambit only like you, Chere," Gambit said.

"Do I know that?" Rogue said.

"'Course," Gambit said. "You jus' hard woman to convince, dat all."

That bit of honesty made Rogue feel a little bad for blowing him off the way she had.

Swallowing her nerves, she leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the lips, before he was ready for it.

"Keep tryin'," she said, before she could lose her nerve.

Then she bolted upstairs really fast before he could react.

She needn't have fretted. Gambit stood frozen there for some time.

Emma, walking by, shook her head. "Men," she muttered.

///Final Emma aside:

"I never get caught." (Sips tea smugly.)///

"Did someone put mistletoe over the doorways?" Shine asked, in the hall outside their room.

Wally rubbed his head. "I wonder who could have done that," he said innocently. 

"Oh brother," Shine said, then she kissed him. "Merry Christmas. This was one of the best ones ever."

"It really was," Wally said. "Man, I'm gonna miss it...but let's not think about that right now. We should have made a postcard though."

"Let just get inside and lock our door before someone comes and has another problem," Shine said suddenly. "I can feel it coming for us now." She dashed into the room.

"She's right, you know," Wally said to no one. "Every time."

* * *

The day after Christmas--which Emma called "Boxing Day", and it was still a holiday in Britain--no one had any school or work to do.

The kids used their new gifts and then got tired of some of them and switched to making the snow fort even bigger and more elaborate outside.

Storm was enlisted to help with this and to make it snow on them in just the right way.

You could not have convinced the kids that Storm's power was not basically for their own personal amusement.

But Storm rather liked using her power to make people happy. Took her back to her village days...but without the uncomfortable worship aspect of it.

"She's not a show pony." Logan took a negative view of it.

"Oh, let 'em have fun," Rogue said. "You're the most cantankerous man I ever did know, Logan."

"He jus' upset he didn't get no Christmas miracle," Gambit said.

Rogue turned red and left the room in a hurry.

"Whatever you two did yesterday, it must have been shockin'," Logan said.

"It ain't none of yer business anyway," Gambit said.

"And who's askin'? Just go somewhere else and make goo goo eyes," Logan growled.

Gambit walked away, but he was more amused than insulted.

"Is he right?" Emma said, joining Logan at the window. "You know, a lot of people around here don't really talk about what they want. Must drive the telepaths crazy."

"Mind yer own business, Frost," Logan said.

Emma glanced at him and then laughed dryly.

"What's so funny?" Logan said.

"Nothing, just...nostalgia," Emma said. "Or deja-vu...whatever. You remind me a good deal of the Wolverine I know."

"Don't tell me you're friends or somethin'," Logan said.

"I wouldn't be so bold," Emma said. "Still...he was the only one--well, never mind, I don't think I'll tell you, actually. Remarkably, you're quite similar. Only, he wasn't over Jean."

"Watch yer mouth," Logan said.

"Sorry." Emma didn't sound sorry. "I guess the holiday spirit hasn't quite worn off yet... Takes a day or two for it to stop feeling like Christmas."

"What does Christmas have to do with bein' nosy?" Logan said.

"You don't know that many British people, do you?" Emma said.

[This is a joke, by the way. I don't really think British people are like that. Calm down.]

"I'm Canadian--why would I try to know any British people?" Logan snorted.

"Hmm," Emma said. "That reminds me, I've been meaning to ask you, why haven't you gone off to find your roots yet? I get the distinct impression you don't have your memories either.... Do you have anything?"

"Ain't any of yer business, Sweetheart," Logan said warningly.

"But it might be." Emma suddenly gave him an intent look. "I helped the other Wolverine find some clues about his past, actually."

She had his attention now.

"And what did he find?" Logan said, in a low voice.

"He never exactly said," Emma said. " I knew it had to do with his time on Weapon X."

Logan definitely was interested now. "And where did he go?"

"A little spot in Canada... Of course there's no telling if you share this history," Emma said. "But I take it...you were Weapon X. But I found no sign of Mystique being part of it here. Must be a difference."

"She better not have been," Logan said.

Mystique was sitting in the living room, reading another of Shine's books, and she looked up to see them both eyeing her.

"What?" She turned away huffily.

"No, she's not," Emma decided. "Thank goodness for that. Some things are too strange to even think about."

"Whatever that means," Logan said. "Tell me, what did yer Wolverine find? Anythin' about bein' brainwashed?"

"A little, but it was more about something he thought he did," Emma said. "Only he didn't do it. I'm not sure it'd be of any use to you...but there's a possibility I might be able to help you also. I know sort of what to look for...if you're interested."

"And what do you get out of it?" Logan said.

"I don't have to get something out of it." Emma turned her back, offended. "I'm here indefinitely, aren't I? I could contribute a thing or two. Clearly Xavier hasn't been able to do much for you. But he's looking blindly. That can make it difficult to sort out what's important and what isn't. I might be able to help. I have a lead... You can think about it."

"I don't have to think about it," Logan said. "If ya can help, I want to know. Where to go...who to find."

"There may be no one to find," Emma said. "But before we go poking around your head...think about this. Is this the right time to leave your team?" She turned to give him a quizzical look. "The Rogue I knew always said Wolverine couldn't stay in one place. You seem not to have such a problem with this...but, even so...with a potential world-threatening crisis on our hands, would you go off for who knows how long just to track down your past?"

Logan stared at her.

"I'm just asking--how important it is to you?" Emma said. "Before I just hand over knowledge to people. It pays to know."

"What kind of man I was, that seems pretty important to know to me," Logan said. "I remember as far back as the war...but it's fuzzy, what happened at that place. So much around it...my mind is too shattered to remember a lot, the Professor says. Could take years."

"You may have the time," Emma said. "But I don't, Wolverine, so think carefully about it. But let's not discuss it further just now. They'll say I put you up to making a rash decision."

"You know, I can hear you." Mystique looked up, finally. "And some of us might say that anyway."

"And who would care about your opinion? Raven Darkholme," Emma said.

"Why would you want Wolverine to leave?" Mystique said.

"I don't," Emma said. "But people have to follow their hearts sometimes. If that's what they want."

"Seems that following your heart got you killed," Mystique said.

She didn't actually think about that being so deeply offensive, but suddenly a psionic wave knocked her out of her seat and onto the floor.

Emma was glaring at her.

"Hey," Logan said. "Stop it. Keep it to words, ladies. We don't attack other team members."

"Forgive me," Emma said coldly. "I believe I just lost control for a moment."

"No, you didn't," Mystique muttered, pushing herself up.

"Clumsy me," Emma said. "Carelessness is a failing, isn't it, Mystique?" She walked to the door, then paused.

"I believe Storm might be in distress," she said oddly. "Funny, I thought the kids were just playing... Oh right, the Storm here has claustrophobia."

"Does the one you know not?" Mystique said.

"You know, I don't recall any situation ever coming up about it," Emma said. "But perhaps she was over it by the time I met her."

Logan was out the door already.

"And so the plot thickens," Emma mused.

"Get a life, Frost," Mystique said, picking up her book.

"You first, Raven," Emma said airily, leaving the room.

Mystique turned into Frost for a moment. "I'm Emma Frost, and I think I'm better than everyone else."

"That's her all right," Morph scared her by looking in and commenting.

Mystique jumped and turned back to herself. "Stop doing that!"

* * *

Storm wasn't in real danger. All that had happened was that she'd been reinforcing part of the fort with ice, and one of the kids had hit it with something heavy and made it cave in on her.

The panic that ensued surprised them.

"Kevin, get her out of there!" Jubilee yelled.

"I'm trying!" Kevin was just making the problem worse by shaping things the wrong way.

"Stop it!" Storm had just enough self control to know it was him. "Stop moving things!... Get me out!"

"I got it!" Jubilee tried to shoot the snow away, which didn't help that much.

Logan came hurtling outside. "What did you kids do?"

He kicked the snow away fast enough and pulled Storm out, to her relief.

"Oh..." Her vision cleared... "It...it was just an accident, Logan."

"Be more careful!" Logan said crossly to the kids.

"Logan, don't frighten them." Storm put a hand on his arm.

"We're sorry," Jubilee said. "We didn't mean to do it. It just fell in."

Logan calmed a little. "Fine, but no more usin' Storm like a snow cone machine. Make yer own fort."

"Sure thing." Ryan was scared of him. "Yeah, it's more fun anyway. Girls stop getting to cheat."

"You guys had someone who literally just shapes the snow however you want on your side," Jubilee said.

"Well, at least that's his power," Ryan argued.

"You always say that when it works out for you," Jubilee argued back.

"This is so stupid." Kitty shivered. "I don't want to play anymore."

"Come on, Storm." Logan was leading her inside.

"I'm really all right now ," Storm said. "What is this level of concern? I can handle it."

"You could say no to them also," Logan said.

"Logan, I don't know what's gotten into you." Storm was mad a little now. "I certainly don't intend to be so stuffy I won't help the children have some harmless fun. Accidents just happen... First yesterday and now today--what exactly is upsetting you? Whatever I did, I apologize. Have I not been careful enough on the job?"

"No," Logan said.

"That what?" Storm asked.

Logan kicked snow. "Sometimes I just worry ya take it a little too hard, don't watch yerself."

"I never expected you of all people to worry about that," Storm said, "considering how you are yourself, also... What brought on this shift of concern?"

Good question. Logan wished he knew the answer himself.

"Logan--" Storm was really worried now. "--what's wrong? Just tell me. This is concerning..."

"It's..." Logan actually almost said it, but then he stopped. "Nothin'," he lied.

Storm knew he was lying. She didn't like being lied to.

"Very well," she said a little stiffly.

"There might be somethin' else," Logan said.

Storm tilted her head.

"Frost, she was just tellin' me there might be somethin' she can help me with, about my past," Logan said. "But it would be a long trip. Maybe for nothin'. She said to think it over."

Storm frowned. "You go on these trips so often...but in the end, don't they just leave you with more questions?"

"But shouldn't I want to know?" Logan was a little touchy on this point.

"I suppose everyone wants to know the truth of who they are," Storm said. "But...someone who has been so many people as you, Logan...it may never end. I don't understand why you need to know so badly what you were, when you could just be what you are now. Do you not prefer this?" She gestured around. 

"I can't leave it alone," Logan said. "I just have to know. Ya wouldn't understand... You remember all of yer past."

"There is some of it I might have wished to forget, at some point." Storm was a little put out. "Though perhaps not now. It is part of who I am...but I would not chase it, go backwards...not forwards."

"Easy for you to say. You know what backwards would be," Logan said.

"I don't see how chasing the past is not going backwards," Storm said. "But it is your life, Logan, and your decision. Obviously you need this to have peace. I'm not sure what it has to do with what we were discussing before, but if you don't want to talk about it, then I won't press you. The others may not like it however... You'll have more of a debate with them, I daresay. Unless you do what you usually do and leave without so much as a word."

She walked inside.

Ouch...

Storm was one of the few people who didn't usually talk about Logan's habit of going off alone--though she didn't care for it--so he didn't give her feelings on it much thought.

But it seemed she didn't disagree with Cyclops...

Why should he care?

But of course...he did.

https://youtu.be/s6VslPcxhs4

[Try-- P!NK]

* * *

"Storm, whatever is the matter?" Shine asked, when she found her stormily pruning some of her garden plants.

"Nothing you need to worry about," Storm said.

"I can't seem to help it," Shine said. "I just care too much. Don't torture me with suspense. I'll start to feel like a busybody."

"Perhaps," Storm said, shortly.

Shine turned and walked toward the door.

"No, wait," Storm said. "Forgive me. That was uncalled for."

"If I'm butting in too much, just tell me so," Shine said, hurt. "I just thought..."

"No, no, you were just concerned," Storm said. "Perhaps it does concern you anyway. Frost has offered to help Logan with something regarding his past."

She explained the rest of it briefly.

"I wonder how she knew about it," Shine said. "Just reading his mind wouldn't tell you so much, I'd think."

"The truth is none of us know that much about what Logan has been," Storm said.

"He's been many people." Shine sat down on one of the gardening step stools, looking thoughtful.

"You know something about it," Storm said.

"Yes," Shine said. "Just bits and pieces. I suppose no different than he does himself. Frost may know something from her world. Perhaps the Wolverine there has more memories."

"But wouldn't they be the same?" Storm said.

"No, but one lead might fall into another," Shine said. "I can't blame Emma for wanting to help."

"If we're sure that is what she wants," Storm said.

"I don't think she's plotting against Logan," Shine said. "Or us...it would hurt her to do so. She must know that. You don't fully trust her yet."

"Knowing she has kept information back, it is hard to do so," Storm said.

"Gambit does too," Shine said.

"It was hard to trust him, though I believe he had good intentions," Storm said.

"Interesting. You know, most people don't distinguish between those two things," Shine said. "But you're right. Good intentions do not make someone trustworthy. Emma may have good intentions...but she may not be right. That said, Ororo, Logan is not easily deterred from these soul seeking quests of his. I can't blame him."

"Oh...it's not that I blame him," Storm said, uncertainly, "but when will it ever end? At some point, perhaps one just has to live with not knowing."

"And not caring," Shine mused. "I'd have to agree. But I also know it is horrid not to remember who you are. And I've only had that problem for a day at most. For years and years, it would drive a lesser man mad."

"But he has the X-men," Storm said. "We all do. Whatever we were. Rogue didn't remember either."

"But Logan remembers just enough to know what he doesn't remember, unlike Rogue," Shine said. "I do find it odd that Xavier seems to feel remembering is useful to Logan, but didn't think so with Rogue. I think it's best to be consistent on principle, even if things look different... Logan's mind may be healed in time--God has an effect on people...but memory is tricky, also. The soul remembers it all, but the mind may not. Logan is troubled by the ghosts of things he may never understand... It can be healed, but healing would be faster if he knew what it was. Even for an ordinary person, we suppress trauma and we push away memories... I never really did that--I'm not one of those people--but many, many people do. He may not wish to remember as much as he thinks he does."

"So what does this mean?" Storm asked.

"I have to side with Emma," Shine said. "I'm afraid it's better for Logan if he knows what to deal with. It may make it hard for a while, but you can face a thing you know...but I also think you might have a point. He'll probably never know it all. He needs to decide he knows enough. I'll tell him so if he asks me for my take on all this, but I doubt he will. He asked you, though. That's interesting. Must have been trying to gauge your reaction."

"I can't imagine why," Storm said. "Something has been odd with him lately. I think I did something, but I don't know what."

"No, it wasn't you," Shine said. "It's our fault. We said something, and it's probably bothering him."

She stood up again. "All you did was be your usual, awesome self."

"Please, Shine, that does not help."

"Well, it's the truth," Shine said. "Don't worry, he'll get his head on straight...but, as usual, he prefers it to be knocked on straight rather than just adjust it himself. That man is so stubborn." She shook her head. "If he makes himself do this the hard way, though, what can we do?"

"I feel there is something here that you are not telling me that would make what you're saying make sense," Storm said.

"How about we make it more interesting instead?" Shine suddenly got a gleam in her eye. "We could just be sulky about it, or I could tell you something that might change things up a little."

"Excuse me?" Storm said.

"I think you shouldn't just take it," Shine said. "Everyone else would do that. But not you, Storm. That's what I like about you. What if I told you something about Logan's past? It might help."

"I... What kind of thing?" Storm's respect for privacy was more than most people's...but it was Wolverine's past. Who wouldn't have been overcome by curiosity?

"Not much," Shine said. "Just a couple things...but if he's going to Canada, it might be useful."

She examined a narcissus thoughtfully. "One thing I know. Logan's old name? His birth name, it was James."

"James?" Storm didn't think it sounded right.

"Yeah, my reaction also," Shine said. "Went by Jimmy to many people. Last name was Howlett. I think I prefer Logan."

"I think I prefer that also," Storm said. "There's something far too respectable sounding about James to fit Logan."

"Well, a name is what you make of it," Shine said. "Perhaps if you're a Peter Pan reader, James is not so innocent sounding, being Captain Hook's name. But that book is messed up anyway. It's a biblical name, though, not uncommon for how old he is. He was born in the 1800s, I know that. In Alberta, Canada. That's about as far back as I know."

"This information would interest him," Storm said. "Why not tell him ages ago?"

"Because, setting up that kind of thing is dangerous," Shine said. "For me, anyway. Unless he asked. One doesn't want to get too cocky."

"At first you both seem like you refrain very little from speaking your thoughts," Storm said. "But the more I hear, the more I think you refrain all the time."

"Yes...I've said so to many people," Shine said. "DJ-ing is not easy... I know about Weapon X also, but that, he knows already. But when you unmake a man, there's no telling what he'll do, and not even remember it. I know this much: Logan would not have chosen to be their experiment if he'd known what it would do to his mind. That he likes his freedom has, I think, never been different about him. And I think he's been pretty much the same sort of person his whole life. But living so long, doing so much, being used so often...it scrapes away at you. Being on the X-men has given it back to him, but he doesn't always believe that."

"I see," Storm said. "This is why you would not bring it up."

"I heal people, or try, where they are now," Shine said. "And God heals the past. It's a dual process. The idea is to be a new creation, so that the past no longer matters. Logan has struggled to embrace the idea all through our teaching, and he's gotten better...but these kinds of relapses happen to everyone. Honestly, the best way to test if it stuck might be to just let him go, see if he can let it go himself."

"I see," Storm said. "So why did you tell me?"

"Logan likes to walk into traps." Shine shrugged. "Maybe someone should go with him if he's going to go off gallivanting around again. I'd dearly love to prevent him from running from this problem. But it's up to you."

"Perhaps you should just share this info with him yourself." Storm balked at the idea she was suggesting.

"I could, but it's more fun this way." 

"Shine!" Storm was shocked. "This is a side of you I didn't expect."

"Oh, it won't hurt him," Shine said, dismissing her concern. "What difference does it make anyway? As long as he knows. But I don't want to be treated like a guru on the past here. I hate that. So...maybe if you handled it, I could avoid that. Call it selfish, but it won't hurt you, will it?"

"I...suppose not, but I don't know that I want to be in the middle of this."

"Fair enough. Don't be, then," Shine said. "You choose, Ororo. How much do you want to be involved? I guess I'll just act accordingly."

"Why are you putting this on me?"

"Trust me," Shine said, a little more subdued, "you'll be glad I did later. This sort of thing creates distance so fast if we're not careful. Think about it."

She walked out.

But she muttered to herself, "You think you can run away, Logan? You wily fish. I ought to be thanking Frost. You won't outfox me so easily. Some people can't learn something till it's hammered into their head. Stubborn mule."

But no one heard her say this except the wall and perhaps God Himself. [And the audience, I suppose.]

[You know, Shine is like if a supervillain spent all their time trying to mess with people to get them to be happier and better people. My siblings say she's like if Azula from Avatar was good. I was in denial, but then I realized they were totally right...scary. Can't you just see her saying "because I'm a people person"?]

* * *

"You're leaving? Now, of all times?" Scott said. "You do realize we have a lot of things going on right now."

"We're at a lull," Logan said. "I don't want to wait for the fat to hit the fire. Might as well go now. Frost showed me some place.... I gotta know."

"We understand," Xavier said. "But you have so little to go on, and you're counting on it being the same in this dimension."

"Whether it's the same or not," Logan said, "I have to find out one way or the other. That other lead I followed ended up bein' real...sort of."

"You will hurry back," Jean said. "If...if something goes wrong here, you wouldn't want to be away for it. We know you too well."

"Anyway this will only take a day or so," Logan said. "Ya all can hold it together that long, I hope."

[Famous last words.]

No one could talk him out of it.

Frost had helped him remember more by sharing her memories of what she'd learned than anything else.

But it was enough to make him curious.

The others weren't sure why she was helping, other than her attested reason of just wanting to.

"You be careful," Morph warned Logan. "Watch out for traps."

"Please," Logan said.

Storm had been pondering the matter all day and almost decided just to leave it alone, but since he was going anyway...

She figured Shine would talk to him if she absolutely refused to, but that seemed kind of cowardly at the same time.

Wally had told him to watch it also but didn't seem to have Shine's concern about the whole thing...but when did he ever?

"Logan." Storm followed him to the garage.

Logan looked up.

"Perhaps I shouldn't say this," Storm said. "But all I can think about is that it's not fair if I don't.... I may have a lead for you."

"You?" Logan said. "How?"

"Shine told me something," Storm said. "Something that may or may not help... It's more than any of us have ever learned, but it's not much."

"Well, what was it?" Logan said.

Storm hesitated. "I'm not sure it's wisest to just tell it to you. I'm afraid it could lead to trouble, chasing down these leads. Old ghosts are usually haunting more than just one person."

"I doubt Sabretooth will show up to this one. He's still behind bars," Logan said.

"And people you do not remember might be there." Storm crossed her arms, suddenly angry. "I don't think you should go alone."

"Everyone else has to stay here and make sure nothin' happens," Logan said. "Takes all of 'em to do what one of me does."

"Very amusing, Logan." Her tone said otherwise. "If you want to know the tip, I'm going with you."

"You're...what?" Logan looked way more shocked than he should have been. Hank had gone with him before, after all.

"I can only assume Shine told me for a reason," Storm said.

"I'll just bet she did!" Logan was mad. "I outta go in there and--"

"And what?" Storm said, a little scornfully for her. "Intimidate her?"

Logan stopped. 

"Yeah, that would never work on that woman," he muttered. "Meddler... Storm, this kind of thing ain't somethin' for you."

"Why not? Hank has gone," Storm said. "And I know something...not much. But something."

"And I'm not lettin' Shine just mess with my head," Logan said. "She's up to somethin', I guarantee it."

"If she is, it's because you have been too stubborn to listen to her directly," Storm said severely. "This idea is risky, and you know it. She didn't try to stop you, though. She told me she thinks you may need to learn this. But she shares our opinion of doing it alone. So, I'm offering a compromise. Take it or leave it."

"And you'd really just hold off on that tip if I say no." Logan was a little surprised. Storm didn't usually do things like that.

"At risk of sending you into more danger on your own if I don't, then yes." Storm had a reason ready.

Logan knew he was beaten because...even knowing it was clearly a set up, he still wanted to know the lead.

Dang it, Shine!

When he got back, he was going to chew her out for this.

But it wasn't like anything was going to happen...

"Fine," he said. "Ya want to come, you're wastin' yer time, but I can't stop ya. But you'll have to tell me."

"I will tell you on the way." Storm wasn't falling for that.

So much for the idea of just driving off, then...not that that would work on Storm if she was really serious...and getting his car fried wasn't the best idea either...

Cursing mentally at Shine for not minding her own dang business, Logan got into the jeep instead.

Storm reluctantly climbed into the other side. "I suppose you want to drive."

"Yeah," Logan said.

"Very well," Storm said. "We'll just head for Canada for now. I'll explain more on the way."

"Fine," Logan said sourly.

* * *

"And you sent them off...together? Alone?" Wally said.

"I know, I know," Shine said. "It's kind of risqué."

"Are you serious? That's genius!" Wally said. "A little out there for you, but genius." He hugged her like an excited kid. "I bet they're just going to be so miserable. It'll be hilarious. I wish we could witness how uncomfortable it'll be."

"You two really are sick," Gambit said. "Gambit can't believe Storm go."

"Good for her," Rogue said, crossing her arms. "Not lettin' Logan just do whatever he wants, for once. He don't appreciate it, that's his problem."

"You know, I wasn't really lying about being concerned," Shine said. "When is he ever not ambushed while he's on these quests? Seriously, name one time."

No one could.

"If I'd known you knew more," Emma commented, joining them, "I might have pushed further than I did. But why didn't you tell him?"

"Reasons," Shine said. "And you had better have had good ones, Emma. Logan is our friend. We just want him to be at peace."

"I'm not against that," Emma said. "Despite what you may think. I have a keen sense of people's inner trauma as a telepath. What does it profit me if they're miserable? I'm no sadist."

"Good," Gambit said. "Keep it dat way, but don't go poking around anyone else's mind without deir permission."

"Afraid I might actually discover genuine information about you?" Emma said.

"More dan you can handle," Gambit said.

Emma frowned at him.

"Real question," Wally said. "Do you ever...you know, read more than you really wanted to? Like...stuff no one wants to see."

Emma made a face. "One could say that... Usually it happens so fast, only the specific memories you look for are seen and really understood. But I suppose amateurs...before they learn to control it."

"And that's a nightmare," Shine said. "Only God could handle that kind of knowledge of people and not be jaded."

"I don't know about that," Emma said.

"Well, now that those two wannabe love birds are gone, what are we gonna do without 'em?" Rogue asked.

"Try not to fall apart in Storm's absence," Shine joked.

"Back to the usual, right," Wally said.