•Harry's pov•

"Harry, Harry... hey it's just a dream wake up." I frantically opened my eyes pointing my wand at the figure above me. I think. Everything was blurry and my head was pounding. "Hey it's just me, it's Draco.. you're safe." I sighed reaching for my glasses, "lumos." I whispered quietly. Once I could see again, I looked over at Draco. "Sorry, you can go back to bed." He shook his head, "here I got you some water, go change into dry clothes and sit on my bed. I'll change your sheets." I shook my head, "it's fine I can take care of myself."

"Look it's okay, I get them too. No need to get defensive Harry I'm just trying to help." I wanted so badly to yell, to tell him to go the hell away because I didn't need help. For some reason I couldn't though. I got up, wandlessly conjuring some clothes and changing quickly. Not even caring about changing infront of Draco. I didn't think he was watching anyways. I sat on his bed and drank the water, trying my best to slow my breathing. I felt a cool hand on my back, "may I sit?" I nodded, not trusting my voice.

He sat next to me and wrapped his arm around me, holding me close to his chest. I burried my head in his neck, "head. Hurts." Was all I could manage to get out. "Do you want to go to the hospital wing?" I shook my head, "bed." I heard him sigh, but regardless he helped me up and walked me over to my bed, I laid down and he pulled the covers over me and took my glasses off. I swear I vaguely remember him kissing my forehead but I may have just made that up in my head. "Get some rest Scarface."

"Night Dray."

•

•Draco's pov•

"Hermione, may I speak to you?" I whispered to the girl indulged in a book in the library. She looked up, and smiled softly, "of course, come on." We headed out of the library, and over to moaning myrtles bathroom. We entered quietly, and she faced me. "What is it?" She asked, concern laced in her voice. "Harry." She nodded, "I figured. What happened?"

"Well last night he had a really bad nightmare, his head hurt. Sweating profusely. He couldn't breathe. I offered help and he took it reluctantly, but it seems I struck a nerve because he won't speak to me now." Hermione shook her head, a frown evident on her face, "Harry has had a hard time since the war. He has really bad nightmares. Harry has never been able to live, think, or act for himself. It's always been someone telling him what to do, or him having to decide things based on the protection of others. He doesn't like asking for help anymore. The last three days are the most he has talked in awhile. Just give him some space, and let him breathe. He will come to you. Just know you didn't do anything wrong."

"That stuff about his muggles yesterday threw me off. I'm assuming they weren't very good to him?" She shook her head, the frown still on her face, "no. It's not my place to spew out all of his trauma of course, but that's why he's so against the thought of people seeing him as gay. I don't want to give you too much of his personal information, but I will say this much. I see how you already are with him, it's not hard to miss that you care for him. So all I ask is that you really think about this friendship with him. It isn't the easiest and you just have to be understanding.

He's going to try to push you away, he's going to get angry sometimes not at you but at the fact that you care. Harry is a ticking time bomb, he's got trauma that he hasn't found a healthy way to face yet. Me and Ron have learned his cues and his triggers, and if you don't think you can handle him than please don't let yourself in, okay? I know you would never purposely hurt him.. I also know you, yourself, have triggers and trauma.. but Harry's biggest fear is losing people he loves. He has this idea that everyone close to him is going to disappear. Just please don't jump in there if you're not ready to actually be there. I hope none of that offends you."

I took a second to take in her words, I appreciated her honestly. Most people may take offense, but seeing as my situation is similar I understand where she's coming from. I don't blame her for trying to protect her bestfriend. "It doesn't offend me. It's sweet how close you all are. I honestly appreciate you being real with me about it, I am not going anywhere unless he wants me to. I have spent too much time of my life wasting it on hating him, when I never really did. I will just be more cautious from now on."

She finally smiled, like a weight was lifted off of her shoulders, "I think you'll be good for him. I think he already has a harder time pushing you away. Maybe it's because you all are very similar, or maybe it's something else. Either way Harry has never opened up to someone so quickly before. I just hope you can handle the Ron and Harry bromance." I chuckled, "you make it sound like me and Harry are together."

She just gave me the famous Granger look, "I should get back to the library." She said softly, avoiding eye contact as she left. I mentally groaned. Not her too. Now I have to deal with my mother, and Hermione thinking that I fancy Harry. That was a scary thought, those two women were more powerful alone than some of the greatest wizards of all time. I'd admire it really if they weren't so scary.

•

•Harry's pov•

I felt bad for avoiding Draco. I knew he was just worried for me. I just didn't know how to handle his random affection. I wanted to let people in, but it wasn't so easy nowadays. I fight so hard with my mind. The nightmares, the panic attacks. It's all apart of my healing that I just don't know how to handle. I know I need help.. but I don't want to get help. I don't want to be looked at like I'm crazy. I decided to write a letter to Sirius and Remus.

(TW)

Dear Padfoot,

I need you to be my therapist, so please take this seriously. Love you.

I need advice.. I got roomed with Malfoy. I had a nightmare last night and he was very helpful, he got me water and changed my bedding because of how much I was sweating. It's hard for me to be back at hogwarts when so much has happened here. The weird thing is, I want to let him help. I so easily wanted to let him in.. I don't like this feeling. I'm terrified to let him in.

Honestly I'm scared Sirius. Every part of me wants to just disappear nowadays... I don't even know if I mean by dying, or just running away. I know I can't, I know I shouldn't.. but I still want to. I'm afraid to talk to anyone else but you. What do I do?

Love always,
Prongslet <3

(End TW)

Dear Moony,

Hey Remmie, just checking in on how it's going? Have you spoken to him yet? I hope you're doing well. I've sent along a photo I was given by Minnie. It's of you and dad.. she wanted to give it to you at our last family dinner and forgot it. Hopefully it gives you a smile, because I'm sure you could use one.

I wanted to talk to you about something that I don't trust Sirius to take.. well.. siriusly..
I'm so funny.

Anyways, how did you realize you were into blokes? I've been heavily questioning myself the last couple of days.. I just don't know how to be honest with myself.

Send me back a picture of Teddy please, I miss him.

Love always,
Prongslet <3

I sighed, sending my letters out with Jily. The name came to me so suddenly, the black feathers and green eyes just reminded me of my parents. Everything reminded me of my parents nowadays. I guess I needed to go find Draco, to apologize. Even though I wasn't really sure how to do that. This is why I always stuck mostly to Hermione and Ron.. they knew how I was. It was easier.

I needed to talk to Ron about something first though. I walked over to his and Notts dorm, knocking lightly. "Who is it!?" I heard Ron shout, making me chuckle lightly. "It's me, my love." I heard some stomping and a few swears, and eventually he opened the door. "Hey mate, what's up?" I shrugged, "can we go to my dorm. I need to talk in private." He nodded, walking out of his dorm. We walked quickly over to my dorm, and as soon as the door was closed I broke down.

"Hey hey it's okay come here." He sat down and patted the spot next to me, pulling me into his side. "Let it out then we can talk okay?" I just nodded, Ron and Mione were some of the only people to ever see me cry. I just felt safer with them.

Once I collected myself, I sighed, "I might be into blokes." Ron just stared at me for a second, "Harry.. do you think that's going to bother me? Look you don't have to rush to figure this all out, either way you'll have me in the end okay? I didn't risk my life multiple times to stand by your side just to leave you alone because you might want to snog a bloke. I love you Harbear." I chuckled through sobs, he always knew the right thing to say.

"Thank you Ron, honestly I don't know what I would do without you." Ron just hugged me tighter, "well you'll never have to figure it out either. I'm here for life." I smiled. We sat like that for a little, just hugging each other. Ron and me got very close after the war, we both felt like we lost a brother when Fred passed away. It brought us to a close point where I think we both just felt like we shouldn't be afraid to be close. We were like a pair of girls as most say.

I didn't even hear the door open, and Ron must not have either because we both jumped at the sound of a voice. "Oh sorry guys was I interrupting.." Draco said awkwardly looking between us. "No no it's alright mate, Harry I'll see you at dinner okay? Keep your head up." He kissed my head before giving Draco a weird high five and walking out. Draco awkwardly avoided eye contact, looking everywhere but at me and I frowned. "Hey I'm sorry okay?" He looked up a bit shocked.

"Don't worry about it." He said waving it off, I sighed going over to him. "Listen I have a lot I'm working through, and it is not fair to just run off and hide from my problems. It's not fair to you, and it isn't fair to myself. I'm sorry I was an asshole, I'm just not good at accepting help." I pulled him into a hug and could feel him relax, hugging me back. "It's alright Potter really, don't sweat it." I just sighed, pulling him closer. It felt nice to hold someone for once.

I didn't pull apart for a couple of seconds, until I heard Jily tapping on the window. I walked over cooing at her, handing her a treat. "Good girl, thank you sweet lady." I could hear Draco practically giggling at me and just rolled my eyes. "Shut it, prat." He just chuckled some more as I opened the first letter.

Dear Prongsy,

I will take it as Sirius as I can.

Hah

Haha

I'm so funny

Anyways, I don't think there's anything wrong with trusting him. He's shown a big change, and you two are more similar than you think. Don't push him away. It's the first step at getting better. Work to make new friends. I know you can do it.

As for wanting to disappear, you're right, you can't. You're Harry fucking Potter (don't tell moony I cursed, thanks) and you are stronger than what you're fighting right now. You've always been strong and it is okay that you don't feel strong right now. If at any point you need to come home, feel free to do so. I love you Harry, you're like my son and it's my job to make sure you're alright so never ever feel like you can't talk to me. If you're comfortable at some point maybe try a mind healer..

I love you,
Sirius <3

I chuckled at the fact that we both made the same Sirius joke. Then I opened up Remus' letter.

Dear Prongslet,

No I have not talked to him yet, I will be tomorrow night when Andromeda gets Teddy. I want to take him out to dinner because I have a lot to say.

As for liking blokes, Harry if you're saying you don't know how to be honest with yourself you've already figured yourself out more than you realize. Either way me and Siri have your backs and love you.

We will be discussing the fact that your sense of humor has entirely morphed since you've been living with Sirius though. I believe a separation must occur, you're basically the spawn of the devil.

Anyways take some time to think over your sexuality, we can speak again when you've been able to properly digest your feelings and thoughts.

Eat some chocolate, it always helps.

Love always,
Remmie <3

I smiled, chuckling at how serious Remus always was. Maybe he was right though, maybe I did already know my sexuality. Either way I didn't feel comfortable labeling anything yet. I will respond to the letters after dinner. "We should head down to dinner. You ready?" I asked softly, and Draco shrugged. "Yeah let's go love." I blushed, trying to ignore the nickname. We headed down to the great hall side by side, enjoying each others silence.

When we sat down Ron immediately got overdramatic, "my love! It's been so long since I've seen you!" He yelled hugging me, I chuckled hugging him back and ruffling his hair. "It's been a bloody half hour Ron." Hermione just sighed, "oh you boys. I feel like I say that fifty times a day. How are you Harry?" I smiled, giving her a hug, "I know you're just jealous of us, but I'm alright. Doing better." I said eyeing Draco. She gave me that classic Hermione look and I just rolled my eyes.

"I'm glad, are you ready for classes tomorrow?" I sighed, "I'm never ready for classes, but I will be there." She chuckled, "you sure will. Or I will come to your dorm and force you there." I ruffled her hair, "I don't doubt it for a second." She groaned, "Harold don't touch my hair!" I just rolled my eyes, "my name isn't Harold!" Pansy chimed in, "never touch a ladies hair!"

"Oh please don't say she's sucked you into the dark side too? You two being friends will be like entering the dark side." Draco Blaise and Ron nodded, "that's true. This is a duo the wizarding world isn't ready for!" Draco said making us all laugh. "I could say the same about a certain blonde and brunette duo." Ginny said making me laugh, "yeah that really is a duo that will have the wizarding world crumbling." Draco chuckled, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. "A friendship they will never be ready for."

"Oh you know it, Malfoy." I said winking at the blonde who just gave me that same challenging look back, "Scared, Potter?" I rolled my eyes, smiling, "You wish."

-

A/N hope you enjoyed loves.

Much love,

-H🫶🏼