Text-thread: Louis and my plum.

Louis: did you know a giraffe's tongue can be 20 inches long

my plum: i did not know that, thank you for telling me.

Louis: and you think a 7 inch dildo is big

my plum: are you comparing my dildo with a giraffe's tongue?

Louis: i'm getting a weird picture in my head here

my plum: yeah that's your own fault

Louis: okay let's replace the thought with MY tongue

Louis: what could it be, four inches?

Louis: it also has the most muscles out of every body part

Louis: so, can i use my four-inch tongue to fist fight your arsehole?

my plum: you know, this might get problematic if you really wanna pursue things with your crush

Louis: what makes you think i don't text them the same thing?

my plum: :(

Louis: so you do like these texts?

my plum: it's entertaining

my plum: it's still problematic if you text two people the same stuff >:(

Louis: who said it's limited to two ?

my plum: shut uP

my plum: you wouldn't do me like that

Louis: right because we're best mates

my plum: right

Louis: so what are you up to?

my plum: actually i just arranged another date for tomorrow

Louis: are you serious ?

my plum: yeah HAHA it's not a tinder date though. this time it's a friend of a friend of a friend

Louis: ???

my plum: what?

Louis: nothing i just ? okay

Louis: think it's gonna be good?

my plum: i don't know i just have to exploit my options, you know?

Louis: okay

Louis: do you normally kiss on the first date ?

Louis: or have sex i don't know

my plum: i mean, it depends on the context

Louis: so you'd have sex with this person if it turns out to be a good date ?

my plum: yeah, are you judging?

. . .

Louis: no, have fun

Louis: use protection

Louis: propose to 'em for all i care

my plum: are you jelly? ;)

Louis: i have a crush, remember?

my plum: trust me i do

Louis: whatever

Louis: have fun

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