Beyond reality

The dragon lifts its sparkling, rainbow-striped tail, snorts, and poops into the patch of tulips. I'm not one to decline a challenge, but this goes too far. Disgusted, I turn away and hold my breath while I try to get out of the beast's vicinity as fast as possible. Not an easy feat with all the shiny armour I'm wearing. The stuff is heavy, and the soft ground gives beneath each step of my steel boots. Accompanied by sucking noises, I continue over the moist, mossy sponge, and soon my footwear is clogged by swampy muck.

This quest develops definitely not the way I imagined. No blue-eyed princess or other swoon-worthy females are available to be impressed, and the stench of the dragon turd is way too offensive for my olfactory sense. Time to quit the game, I might as well profit and take a leak without facing the problem to remove all that armour first. And I might write a loaded review for the game too. With a last glance over my shoulder at the now peacefully snoring dragon, I pull the plug and mutter the command to exit the game ...

Exit...

My desk is cluttered with papers covered in handwritten notes, an assortment of colourful pens, empty coffee mugs, and a half-eaten sandwich. A pang of hunger urges me to reach out for the latter, but my hand hesitates an inch short of the bun. The greenish mould on the surface is the unequivocal proof this food item has been sitting here far too long. I'm not that hungry and desperate. Besides, I have higher priorities. In my fluffy slippers, I shuffle to the bathroom and close the door behind me. My face in the mirror looks drawn and exhausted, I probably should catch up on sleep.

But wait, when did I take off my VR goggles? Irritated, I return to the apartment and check my desk. No sign of the expensive piece of equipment. Only the offending sandwich sits beside my keyboard while my screen shows an idyllic scene of a waterfall in a rain forest. Right, I still need a toilet. I turn around on my heel, and it hits me. This isn't my apartment at all. Instead of quitting the blasted game, I must have been transported to another level. The fat, rainbow-coloured dragon snoring on the purple plush sofa in the corner is proof enough. Disgusted, I repeat the command to take me out of the game...

Exit...

A white, diamond-shaped room, crammed with serious-looking equipment. What's this, the cockpit of a space shuttle? My seat is tipped back, and I struggle to get free of the restraining harness. A soft, artificial voice out of a loudspeaker to my left warns me to leave my recliner.
I clear my throat.

"What the hell? Where are we?"

"About to leave Jupiter orbit on our way to the Kuiper Belt. Please relax while we reach evasive trajectory. We suggest you close your seat belt to assure your safety."

"Wait, I need an explanation. Why the Kuiper Belt? I signed in for an adventure quest, not a space exploration. I'm so not into this shit and—"

A low rumble runs through the ship, and I'm pressed back into the cushioned seat by the force of the acceleration. My left arm is caught behind my back, and I struggle to get it free. No chance to close that harness again with my bruised wrist.
The programmers take it definitely too far, I must get out of that loop, right now.

Exit...

A blue, cloudless sky and a red kite circling above me, a ploughed field, the smell of wet earth, trees in the distance. I sigh. This is our good, solid planet Earth, right? I'm back in trustworthy reality. This is worth another deep sigh, to demonstrate how glad I am to be home. But wait, where is my VR equipment? Frantically, I look around. I'm standing in a field, no hint of my sophisticated rig. Truth dawns on me, and I shiver despite the sunshine. This must be another plane of this cursed game, another loop I'm caught in. The kite dives towards the ground, eyes focused on its prey. I resist the temptation to watch it, to find out if it succeeds. Instead, I repeat the command ...

Exit...

I open my eyes to a room dominated by technology, again, high-tech, state-of-the-art stuff. Could this be the secret control centre of this madness? Driven by instinct, I reach for my VR helmet—only to find it's not there. A glance confirms the angles of the shiny black machines are wrong, the tubes connecting them resembling intestines. No way are they human-made or part of a reality I care to belong to ...

Exit...

A dark cave, water dripping from sharp-edged rocks, an eerie blue light in the distance, illuminating a tunnel. The echo of a howl resonates through the subterranean caverns ...

Exit...

Ear-splitting music, a steaming cup in my hand, the black liquid smelling of decay rather than coffee ...

Exit...

A meadow of purple grass, butterflies the size of ping-pong tables ...

Exit...

A desert, scorching heat blistering my skin ...

Exit...

A field of tulips, a rainbow dragon winking at me.

I sigh and, reluctantly, decide it's time to make a stand.