*Yo Yo Yo what is up my sad carbon based lifeforms! I was- excuse me AM on Wattpad just reading a Fnaf story(I know I know "A FNAF STORY OUT OF ALL THE STORIES THAT YOU COULD BE READING A FNAF STORY!?!?!") but anyways this amazing Author~chan wrote this amazing heart tugging story and in the end the reader killed themselves... Although I am sad and it hit quite a sensitive spot in my heart, I am still gonna write for you guys because well...I can. Hope you enjoy! Peace!*

"I was here. I am here, and I always will be. I am that being in the deepest darkest corners of your mind waiting for you're most vulnerable moment, waiting to strike." - The Real Me

I have the sneaking suspicion that you guys are confuzzled. Well that's good because you should be, I am actually here today to start my high AF rant about what I call "The Real Me". If you want to keep your sanity by the end of this than leave now...........................

 Are you gone yet??? Yep, Ok, good now to start this off with me being the awkward teen I am I have had a lot of identity, so this may just be a type of phase but this for now is what is my real me. "The Real Me"is the me that I happen to hide from everyone. It's all of my faults and flaws that looks back at me like a mirror during the day to make sure that I know that I am not in a higher position than anyone, It's the me that makes sure that I believe that I'm the helper, and the helper does not deserve help, and that is why I help, cause it's the only way I can assure myself that I'm actually contributing, when in reality I'm actually just hurting myself and beating myself up. 

And I actually kinda- no DO deserve all of it, or that's what this "Real Me" says. The sad thing is that I'm afraid to talk about this because I really don't want others to see this "Real Me", the me that will take advantage of you, then belittle you, make you feel a bit better, and then drop kick you into the dark abyss, alone. This is the me I try really hard not to show because tbh this side of me is actually a really huge douchebag, no matter how much you would ask the people that have gotten to know me they would deny it and say it's not true, and that's cause they haven't and they've only seen the part of me that I want them to see, and the mask that i've put up to hide from anyone, and to protect myself. 

If I were to be that "Real Me" I would have been dead by 7 years old (because I either wouldn't be able to live with what I've done, or I would flat out been kicked out of society itself). I hate having people see this side of me because it's painful to see the hurt looks on their faces. I know that's quite a bit but that not all, and if you've gotten here then I applaud you. Continuing on, I absolutly hate confrontation and that's because this "Real me" (we'll call it Oppositre for now), I've always been afraid of this because I'm afraid I'll be yelled at and I feel weak when people see me after and while I've been yelled at, and this is because I change completely, that's why I hide myself after a fight because I'm afraid I'll hurt someone, either mentally or physically. 

  I'm a monster on the inside, I am a REAL monster, but you'll never see that side of me. 

  Because I put up this act like I'm all strong and I can get through anything and fix every problem in the universe and that I'm never sad,or that I have any other feeling other than happiness. Thats not true, I'm just another human in this small planet with millions of others that are different- BETTER than me. I'm not perfect and that's what my Oppositre is here to make sure that I remember that. They make my life a living accident they make me feel like.....well...me. "Useless, worthless, a failure, an accident, a horrible person, a burden, dragging everyone down with me, painful, cringy, disgusting, not light enough, not safe, not as she seems, STAY AWAY".

 This is nothing compared to when I'm sucked into their trance, because then these words leave marks, BIG marks on my soul. And they'll do a loooooot more than just this but it's getting late and I wanna read some Undertale one-shots so I'll leave with your sanity.(or what's left of it). Have a nice night!

                                                                                                                                                                                              ~Lizzie11o