This is the last chapter of Wretched Choices! Thank you very much for being with me all throughout and holding on to Keia's wretched choices.

#WretchedChoicesWP

Chapter 40
Lying

Pursing my lips after reading his speech for our graduation, I gave Archer back his paper and faced him who looked like a hopeful child, waiting for a good response.

For the last day of our graduation practice, he needed to recite his speech and one of our professors would evaluate it. Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit ngayon lang nila ipapabasa sa kanya kung kailangan pa nilang i-evaluate. What if they still wanted to revise a sentence or paragraph? That would be a hassle.

"So, what do you think?"

Humalukipkip ako habang tiningnan siya nang diretso. I tried to look intimidating as much as I could.

Honestly, this was an unbiased opinion, it was a good speech and very uplifting, but I couldn't pinpoint what's lacking. Basta nang binasa ko ay parang mayroong kulang. Mayroon akong hinahanap na wala roon at hindi ko rin masabi kung ano 'yon.

"Hmm... It's good," sabi ko na lang at saka ngumiti, ngunit mukhang hindi siya kumbinsido sa aking sagot.

"Are you sure?"

"Though I feel like it's lacking somehow, it's good," I honestly said this time.

Now, he looked problematic because of my honest review. Back and forth, he glanced at me and his paper for consecutive times. Para bang mahahanap niya kung ano ang mali sa kanyang speech kapag ginawa niya 'yon.

Hindi ko tuloy maiwasan ang matawa sa kanyang reaksyon, pero mas lalo lamang siyang sumimangot. Tila parang papel na nilulukot ang aking puso habang tinitingnan siya.

Trying to memorize everything about him, I stared at his face. The cute creases on his forehead made its appearance as he went over his speech. His lips protruded a bit, frustrated, and it made him look hot and cute at the same time.

Guess I was completely messed up. Would I still be able to recover from this fall?

"Mr. Archer Velarde, please come up onstage."

His name was suddenly called by a familiar voice. It must be one of our professors who was incharged of our graduation practice today.

Natigil si Archer sa pagbabasa at nag-angat ng tingin sa akin. He was hesitating big time! You could tell it just by looking at his troubled expression.

"Should I tell them that I'm not done yet and revise this quickly?"

Muli akong natawa. "Ayos lang naman!" sabay bawi ko ng aking naunang opinyon. "Let them hear it first. It's just one opinion anyway. Others might say otherwise."

Kahit mukhang hindi pa rin siya mapalagay ay mukhang nakumbisi ko naman siya lalo na nang sinundo pa talaga siya ni Mrs. Almacen dito sa backstage.

"Archer, isang run tayo ng speech mo," sabi ni Mrs. Almacen. "Do you have an extra copy?"

Nag-aalangang binigay ni Archer ang copy na binasa ko kanina. He still had another copy folded inside his pocket.

"Lumabas ka na roon para makausad na tayo."

Pagkakuha ni Mrs. Almacen ng kopya kay Archer ay lumabas na rin siya agad.

Ngumiti ako kay Archer at humakbang papalapit sa kanya. I cupped his face with my hands and stared at his eyes for as long as I could, inputting every detail about his feature that I loved the most, hoping I would never forget.

I bit my lower lip.

I would miss this...

"Kaya mo 'yan!" I cheered him up. "I know you'd do well. Ikaw pa ba?"

If you truly loved me deeply, I know you'd be able to move on from me. You'd be able to meet many new people once you're in France. Hope would also be with you there. I wouldn't mind if you'd fall for her instead.

Dream higher without holding yourself back for anyone else. Do not hesitate to go for any opportunity. I had high hopes that you'd accomplish greater things than what you had planned for yourself.

Ngumiti siya pabalik sa akin at nagulat ako nang mabilis niyang hinalikan ang aking noo.

"Let's eat dinner outside later. My treat," he suddenly said.

I nodded my head even though I knew we wouldn't be able to have that dinner. "Lumabas ka muna roon at baka balikan ka pa ulit dito ni Mrs. Almacen," sabi ko. "Hihintayin kita rito."

He chuckled a bit and did what I told him. He took one last glance before he went out to the stage.

Hindi na ako nag-aksaya pa ng panahon. Some students were taking a break at this hour, but I knew Jerome was also just around here since he was part of the committee that he volunteered for.

I pulled my phone out from my pocket and immediately dialed Jerome's number. Thinking that he was probably busy, it took five rings before he answered my call.

"Keia?"

"Nandito ka ba sa loob ng auditorium?" bungad kong tanong sa kanya para makasigurado.

"Yes," he answered. "I'm with the committee. Bakit? May problema ba?"

"Can you come here at the backstage?"

"Ngayon na?" nag-aalangan niyang sabi.

"Yes. Please, Jerome," I pleaded. "Please..."

"Okay. Just stay there. Pupuntahan kita."

Jerome must had thought that it was somewhat urgent. Though for me, it really was.

Nagsimula ang kaba ko nang madinig kong magsimula sa pagsasalita si Archer. His voice could be heard throughout the whole auditorium. The way he recited his speech with conviction, made me feel more intense. Hindi rin nakawala sa akin na medyo mabilis ang kanyang pagsasalita kahit na mayroong diin at pagpapahalaga sa mga importanteng parte.

"Keia."

It had been only four minutes since we ended our call, and Jerome's already here.

"I'm sorry kung medyo natagalan. Tumakas lang ako. Mayroon bang problema?"

His face was filled with concern as he approached me.

Suddenly, I felt a surge of guilt inside me. I didn't want to get him into trouble, but he was the only one I could think of. I had no choice other than him.

Ang kapal nga naman ng mukha ko! Pagkatapos ko siyang saktan ay ganito naman ang gagawin ko sa kanya ngayon.

I wouldn't be surprised if karma would hit me hard after this. I'd just gladly welcome it with my arms open wide because it was what I deserve.

Archer was already on his last paragraph as much as I could remember his speech when I took initiative and held Jerome's hand which caught him off guard.

"K-Keia..." he stuttered saying my name and stepped back a bit.

Jerome was very cautious as of this moment. He must be bewildered and confused since he had no idea of what my plans were. For him, everything was so spontaneous that made it more confusing on his part.

"You told me before that you'd do everything for me, right?" paalala ko sa kanya. "Na kapag kailangan kita ay nandyan ka lang, 'di ba?"

"Keia, what is this about?"

"Just answer me, Jerome!" I frustratedly said.

"Of course! I meant every word I said." I could also feel his frustration. "But what is this all about, Keia? Would you care to enlighten me? Coz I don't have any clue."

I wanted to give him an explanation, but when I heard Archer said thank you, I knew he was already done with his speech. Alam kong babalik na siya kaagad dito.

"I don't have time to explain things," nagmamadali kong sabi at saka nilingon ang daanan patungong stage. "I promise to explain it to you afterwards. Ngayon, ang hinihiling ko lang sa'yo ay hayaan mo ako sa mga susunod kong gagawin."

Mukhang mas lalo lamang siyang naguluhan dahil sa aking mga binitawang salita. "Ano ang ibig mong sabihin?"

Hearing the nearing footsteps from the stage, I started to panicked. I put Jerome's hand on my waist. Before he could even protest, I grabbed his nape, pulling his face closer to mine.

"K-Keia..."

Jerome's brown eyes gave away how clueless he was.

"I'm sorry, Jerome," I whispered before closing my eyes and pulling him even closer for a kiss.

I felt Jerome's whole body froze when our lips touched. I didn't move and just let my lips touched his. The kiss tasted bitter to me that I just wanted to get over it as soon as possible.

The sound of footsteps I was tracking became louder to my ears until it finally stopped—that was my cue. I waited five seconds more before I pulled myself away and smiled at Jerome who was completely stunned.

In my peripheral vision, I could already see Archer staring.

Naturally, I turned his way. It was the time he completely realized that it was really me. He dropped the copy of his speech.

"Archer..." I uttered his name, guilty, as a part of my play.

Those eyes that I loved to stare at turned black, clouded with fury. Like a trigger that had been released, Archer quickly marched his way with an intense speed. Diretsong nakatuon ang kanyang tingin kay Jerome. Before I could even stop him, his fist already landed on Jerome's face.

"Gago ka!" sigaw ni Archer at damang-dama ko ang kanyang makamundong galit.

Dahil hindi pa gaanong nakakabawi si Jerome sa aking biglaang paghalik ay hindi siya kaagad nakaiwas at nawalan ng balanse. He almost fell, but I made sure to hold his arm and kept him standing.

"Will you please stop it, Archer?!" I shouted at Archer which struck him.

Kinuha ko ang tiyansang 'yon para lingunin ulit si Jerome. Ang gilid ng kanyang labi ay mayroong natamong sugat dahil sa suntok ni Archer.

"Jerome, umalis ka muna please..." pakiusap ko kay Jerome nang sa tingin ko'y bumalik na ang kanyang wisyo.

"Pero, Keia—"

"Just go, Jerome!" mariin kong sabi. "Pangako. Mag-uusap tayo."

Kahit punong-puno ng pag-aalangan ay tumalikod siya para umalis bago binigyan ng huling tingin si Archer.

"Saan ka pupunta?!" tawag ni Archer at balak pang sundan si Jerome. "Bumalik ka rito!"

"Ano ba, Archer?!" Tinulak ko si Archer para pagtakpan si Jerome at mapigilan siya.

"I can't let this pass, Keia! He kissed you!"

My heart clenched as he tried to put the blame on Jerome instead of me. He was sparing that thought away even though he saw me smiled after the kiss; even when I didn't protest and get angry at Jerome.

"I need to talk to Jerome—"

"I kissed him!" I said, loud and clear.

Natigil siya sa pagiging bayolente.

I thought he'd always be cool no matter what the situation was, but I guess I really did it today. He suddenly became violent which was very unusual for him to do.

Unti-unti siyang napatingin sa akin. May dumaang sakit sa kanyang mga mata, ngunit agad niya 'yong isinantabi.

"Stop trying to make excuses for Jerome, Keia," he said, still trying to deny the truth. "Hindi mo siya kailangang pagtakpan."

"I'm not making excuses," I said firmly. "I kissed him. I kissed Jerome. Kaya please, huwag mo siyang sasaktan. It's all on me."

He shook his head in disbelief as tears pooled inside his eyes. "I don't believe it..." he whispered. "Hindi mo kayang gawin 'yon."

"Well, I just did," I nonchalantly said.

Looking so offended, he stopped.

Sobrang tagal niyang nakatitig sa akin at ginawa ko ang lahat para hindi manalo ang aking umaapaw na emosyon.

"How can you say it like that?" The pain on his voice pierced into my heart. "Like it's just nothing..."

Suppressing my feelings from bursting, I lifted my head to look at him with conviction. Seeing how hurt he was made me want to back down, but I already made a choice.

"Since nakita mo na naman na, might as well just tell you everything that you need to know."'

His brows furrowed. "W-What do you mean?"

Kinagat ko ang aking ibabang labi at saka ngumiti kahit na hindi iyon naaayon sa situwasyon. "Pagkatapos na sana ng graduation ko sasabihin, pero alam kong hindi ko na 'to malulusutan," sabi ko. "I have no other excuses."

"Keia—"

"I like Jerome," I spat a lie, without batting an eye, straight into his face.

Those three words were enough to zip Archer's lips. That was an opportunity for me to say everything that I thought of saying. Ilang beses ko na itong pinaulit-ulit sa isipan ko. Ang tanging kailangan ko na lang gawin ay sabihin ito sa kanya.

"Remember my plan?" I raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Iniisip mo sigurong matagal na akong tumigil gaya ng sinabi ko, pero pinangako ko sa sarili ko na hindi ako titigil hangga't hindi ka nahuhulog sa akin. I wouldn't stop until I get my sweetest revenge. The moment you fell for me, the game's already over, and I'm the one who won."

A tear shamelessly rolled down his cheek. It took a lot of determination and perseverance for me to continue breaking the heart of the man I love.

"To be honest, I never thought you'd fall for me, but look at you right now... You're even shedding tears for me." I laughed like a bitch, enjoying his misery when that laughter was made to conceal my tears.

Even with thousand of pain crossing his eyes, he still shook his head. "You are lying," he said. "You said you have already forgiven me. That... That the past is something which should be forgotten."

Bahagya akong natigilan dahil hindi pa rin siya naniniwala sa akin kahit ilang masasakit ng salita ang aking binitawan, ngunit agad din akong nakabawi.

I smiled sweetly. "Why would I lie?" I asked him. "What would I get from lying?"

His lips parted, but he couldn't find any answer which would support his groundless deduction. With his silence, I found my courage to speak once again.

"I don't want to end this game on a bad note, but I know it's impossible," I told him. "Kahit papaano, nagpapasalamat ako sa pagmamalasakit at pagmamahal na ipinakita mo kay lola. Sa totoo lang ay balak ko nang tigilan agad dahil dinadalaw ako ng aking konsensya, pero naisip kong kahit ano'ng gawin ko, masasaktan at masasaktan pa rin kita. Still, my heart's full because of the love you gave her. I'm thankful because of that. But I'm sorry if I couldn't get myself to return what you feel for me. Gaya nga ng sabi nila, hindi naman kasi natuturuan ang puso..."

"Pero ang sabi mo... H-hindi mo ako kayang mawala..."

The way his voice broke out, shattered my heart into pieces.

Smiling throughout the pain, I said heartlessly, "That's called acting."

Mas lalong bumagsak ang kanyang balikat sa aking sinabi. Unti-unti na siyang bumibigay sa aking gustong mangyari. Wala nang pagtigil ang pagtulo ng kanyang luha.

"I'm sorry for lying and for playing with your feelings, Archer." I'm for lying about how I truly feel, but I knew that this was the only way.

Naisip kong puwede namang malayo ka sa akin habang binubuo natin ang nagsisimulang relasyon, pero alam kong hindi ka papayag. You wouldn't consider the thought of being away even though I could promise that I wouldn't stary during those years that you'd be gone. Kailangan kitang ipagtulakan palayo sa akin para ikaw na mismo ang gumawa ng desisyon at tanggapin ang tinanggihan mo. I wanted you to do it for yourself, and not for me.

For other people, this might be an addition to the list of my wretched choices, but for me, this was one of the bravest choices and decisions I had ever made. If I'd end up regretting, it didn't matter to me anymore. I had considered all the consequences I might face after this before I wholeheartedly made my final call. It was all or nothing.

"Archer—"

Nalipat ang atensyon ko kay Hope na kakarating lamang sa backstage. Mukhang nabigla siya sa nadatnang nangyayari kaya ngumiti ako sa kanya para masabing ayos lang.

I was about to leave anyway. Kapag nagtagal pa ako ay baka bawiin ko lang lahat ng mga sinabi ko.

"Hope's looking for you," I told Archer with a smirk on my lips. "I should probably go. Jerome's already waiting for me."

Hahakbang na sana ako upang lagpasan siya ngunit talagang umusod siya sa aking harapan bago ibinagsak ang sarili sa lapag upang lumuhod. Nanlaki ang aking mga mata habang nakatingin sa kanya.

Archer kept on shaking his head as he reached for my hand. "Please, tell me you're lying..." he begged.

Sa sobrang higpit ng kanyang pagkakahawak sa aking braso, pakiramdam ko ay mamamakat ang kanyang mga daliri dito.

Sumulyap ako kay Hope na mukhang naalerto sa nangyayari. She wanted to leave, but she also couldn't stop watching Archer on his knees.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi siya nagagalit sa akin. He should be angry at me by now. He should be cursing me for breaking his heart and playing with his feelings. Kung bakit nakikiusap pa rin siya sa akin ngayon ay hindi ko maintindihan.

"G-Give me a chance..." he stuttered. "I may have let you down a couple of times before, but I'll prove myself to you this time. I promise! I'll make up for my mistakes... Keia, please..."

Since his head was bowed down and only Hope could see me right now, I let my tears flow. Mabilis ko rin itong pinalis gamit ang aking kamay na hindi niya hawak.

"Let me go, Archer," mariin kong sabi habang pilit na tinatanggal ang kanyang kamay na nakakapit sa aking braso. "Ano ba, Archer!?"

Kasabay ng pagtulak ko sa kanya ay hinugot ko ang aking braso mula sa kanyang pagkakahawak. Dahil sa panghihina ay nawalan siya ng balanse kaya tuluyan siyang napaupo sa lapag. Sa pagkakabigla ay muntikan na akong lumapit sa kanya ngunit naalala ko ang aking dapat gawin.

I remained standing tall instead of helping him stand up. With a broken heart, I managed to say without faltering, "Huwag mong ipilit ang sarili mo sa akin, puwede ba?!" sabi ko. "I like Jerome! I'm sorry, but I don't think I'll ever fall for you. So please, just leave me alone!"

Biting my lower lip, I spoiled myself by staring at him for a few more seconds while he was looking so lost, staring on the ground.

I'm sorry, Archer... I'm really sorry.

Feeling like I was about to breakdown, I brisk walked past him and stopped for a moment when I reached Hope. Slowly, she turned to me. There were a lot of questions written on her face, but I could only give her a smile.

"Please keep your promise and take care of Archer..." I whispered to her before I continued walking away.