#WretchedChoicesWP

Chapter 28
Little Family

In the midst of approaching my car, Sharry and I stopped when we saw a single stemmed flower on its hood. My all black sedan made the bright color of the flower very obvious. Whoever passes by my car would surely notice it even from afar.

"Mukhang may namali ng lagay." Dinig kong bulong ni Sharry. Hindi na ako nagulat na puro negatibo lamang ang lumalabas sa kanyang labi.

Binaliwala ko na lang ang kanyang sinabi. Nang makabawi ako ay agad ko iyong nilapitan. The flower was secured with a scotch tape, not to be blown away by the wind. Biting my lower lip to stop myself from smiling, I confirmed that the flower was a poeny—my favorite.

Dahan-dahan ko iyong tinanggal sa pagkakadikit sa hood ng aking sasakyan. At some point, I was relieved that the scotch tape didn't leave a mark on the hood of my car.

Nang makitang maayos ang sasakyan ay inilipat ko ang aking tingin sa bubulak para suriin. One look and I knew that it wasn't freshly bought today. No note was left along with it. Whoever gave this wanted to stay anonymous, but I already had a guess. Only one person came into my mind.

Naalala ko ang masakit na imahe ni Archer no'ng gabing 'yon. I could still remember how he held on to the boquet while staring off the distance and waiting for me. That excruciating sight was still so vivid like I was seeing him in front of me at this moment.

"Does Jerome know you like poenies?"

With my forehead creased, I turned to Sharry because of her sudden question. "No," I answered. "Why did you ask?"

"Well, I have to say na si Jerome ang unang pumasok sa isipan ko na puwedeng gumawa niyan," walang pag-aalinlangan niyang sabi sa akin. "You know, I think he likes you."

Mas lalo namang napakunot ang noo ko. I didn't know how she came up with that idea. It was far from any possible version of truth.

"Walang gusto sa akin si Jerome, Sharry."

She raised her eyebrows and smirked. "How do you know?" she probed. "Did you ask him about that?"

"I just know," tipid kong sabi at saka pinatunog na ang sasakyan para makapasok na kaming dalawa sa loob.

I thought our topic would change once we were settled inside the car, but Sharry continued interrogating me about Jerome. I didn't get why she was pushing her idea. Though I had to admit that I've thought of that as well, I was sure that it wasn't really the case. Besides, he told me before that he'd never fall for me.

"Hay, Keia..." She dramatically sighed. "I don't know if you're just really focused to the guy you like which makes you oblivious to those who likes you, or you just don't care at all."

Bahagya akong ngumuso. Hindi ko pa rin alam kung bakit siya nagkaroon ng ganoong ideya at kung bakit ipinagpipilitan niya.

"It's so obvious!" She rolled her eyes. "Did you see the way he cares for you?"

"Ganoon lang talaga si Jerome. Saka mas madalas pa ang pang-iinis niya sa akin kaysa sa pagiging malasakit," katuwiran ko at saka nagsimula na sa pagmamaneho.

"Hay nako, Keia!" eksaherada niyang pagkakasabi. "Minsan ang ibang mga lalaki, dinadaan muna nila sa pang-iinis at biro-biro. Gaya ni Jethro dati. He used to tease me all the time before he confessed that he likes me and he just wanted to get my attention."

I suddenly remembered when she used to rant about Jethro. Walang palya siyang iniinis noon bago umamin at nagsimulang manligaw. She even swore that she would never like someone like him, but she ate her words and now, she was head-over-heels in love with him.

What a scam.

"Malay ba natin kung ganoon din si Jerome sa'yo ngayon," dagdag niya.

Napabuntong hininga ako. "Hindi pa rin sapat na basehan 'yon, Sha."

"So, sino ang naiisip mo, kung ganoon?" Sinulyapan ko siya at kita kong nakataas ang kanyang kilay. "Si Archer?"

I pursed my lips. It was the truth anyway so, I wouldn't deny it nor say anything. Paniguradong alam niya na rin naman ang ibig sabihin ng pananahimik ko.

"Hay... Hindi ka pa rin talaga nadadala, Keia," dismayado niyang sabi bago may naalala. "Ano nga ba ang iku-kuwento mo ulit tungkol sa kanya?"

That's the reason why we decided to go out today while she was waiting for Jethro's classes to end. Mayroon silang movie date ngayon at iyon din ang dahilan kung bakit kami sa kalapit na mall ng campus pupunta para magmeryenda.

"Nevermind," sabay bawi niya. "Doon mo na lang sa akin ikuwento kapag nakarating na tayo."

Hindi na ako sumagot dahil malapit na rin naman kami. After we parked my car, we went to a famous international café and ordered what we usually drink in this shop and waffles with chocolate syrup for each of us.

Sharry didn't want to waste any more time, especially when Jethro texted that his last class was about to end. She immediately asked questions to satisfy her curiosity. I told her what happened the other day and today as well. She was listening intently to whatever I was saying and would ask if she wanted to know more about a certain part.

"Maybe it's a sign for him to stop meddling with you when you didn't come to meet him that night," Sharry shared her speculations. "Gaya nga ng sinabi mo, he would never miss an opportunity before to come to your house. Lalo na ngayon kasi gusto ka niyang makausap. But... he didn't. It's safe to say that he's keeping distance."

Biting my lower lip, I played with my straw and stirred my dark mocha frappe. That was what I wanted in the first place, right? I wanted him to stay away. I wanted to cut whatever relationship I had with him and move on from these unsettling feelings. I should be happy now instead of hurting because I had already decided to let go of the feelings I had for him.

I sighed to myself. Hinding-hindi ko ata maiintindihan ang sarili ko. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko alam kung ano ba talaga ang gusto kong gawin. I kept on making decisions and picking choices that I wasn't really sure of.

Or maybe, I was just really driven by my emotions during that moment. Sa kagustuhan kong maging maayos na lang ang lahat at hindi na mahirapan pa, mas pinili ko ang sa tingin ko'y pinakamadaling desisyon na 'yon din pala ang magpapahirap sa lahat. It was true. You couldn't force your heart to go along with your mind all the time.

"Baka nga pala bumisita ako sa inyo sa Linggo," biglang pag-iiba ni Sharry ng usapan nang mapansing lumalalim na naman ang aking pag-iisip. "I'll visit your grandmother. Isang buwan ko na ring hindi nakikita ang lola mo. I bet she misses me, right?"

Even though my grandmother's only looking for one person, who's most likely, wouldn't be able to visit her anymore, I just nodded and smiled.

"Sha."

Sabay kaming napalingon ni Sharry kay Jethro na kararating lamang. Sharry smiled when Jethro casually leaned forward to kiss the top of her head. I smiled, too, even when bitterness was trying to win me over.

"Tapos na ba kayo?" tanong niya sa aming dalawa at sa huli ay sa akin ipinirmi ni Jethro ang kanyang mga mata para sa akin humingi ng kasagutan.

I knew he didn't want to pressure Sharry to abruptly finish a conversation with me and cut our time that was why he asked me instead.

Tumango na lamang ako sa kanya. "Tapos na kaming mag-usap," sagot ko. "You can take my best friend away now."

"Thank you," he courtly said and turned to his girlfriend with a very sweet smile. "Let's go? I already bought our tickets before I went here."

Ang ngiti sa labi ni Sharry ay walang katumbas nang tumango sa minamahal. Sinukbit niya ang kanyang bag. Lumapit muna siya sa akin upang bumeso at magpaalam.

Jethro held her waist in a very possessive way and pulled her closer to him. They looked glued to each other as they walked out of the café, headed for another date.

I'm happy for her that she found someone like Jethro who knew what she's worth. Sa totoo lang ay hindi ko gusto noon si Jethro para sa kanya. He's got this playful aura which made me think they wouldn't last long because he'd cheat on my best friend. Isali mo pa ang pagkawala ko ng tiwala noon sa mga lalaki dahil sa mga panlolokong naranasan ko. However, he proved me wrong. He proved that he was worth it to be my best friend's man. I just hope that they would last for a lifetime. I didn't want my best friend to experience the pain I went through. Pakiramdam ko ay mas kaya ko pang magpatawad sa mga taong nanakit sa akin kaysa sa taong mananakit sa kanya.

Dahil hindi ko naman masyadong nagalaw ang waffle at ang inumin sa pagkukuwentuhan namin ni Sharry ay nanatili muna ako sa loob ng café. My goal was just to finish the waffle then, I'd go home right away to spend more time with my grandmother.

"Keia?"

That familiar voice sent shivers down my spine. Despite of not hearing that voice for a very long time, I could still recognize the tone of his voice.

Nag-angat ako ng tingin sa lalaking nasa aking harapan. I thought seeing him again would bring back the pain he caused me before, but here I was, looking at him and feeling nothing that I still managed to smile casually.

"Chance," I uttered his name.

After our break up scene at the club, he still tried to pursue me for a week, but he gave up eventually when he realized that I wouldn't give him another chance. His mother, who really liked me for him, also tried to talk to me.

I would never tolerate cheating. No matter how many times I experienced it, I would never tolerate it... I could never tolerate it. Kung sinaktan mo ako sa paraan ng panloloko at pinagpalit ako sa iba, asahan mong wala ka nang babalikan.

His face lit up when he smiled. I had to admit that he got even more handsome. He also got this unusual mature aura—very far from his nature before.

"Are you alone?" he carefully asked.

Tipid akong tumango. "Kakaalis lang ni Sharry."

He smiled wider. "Can I sit with you for a while?" He pointed at the vacant seat where Sharry sat earlier.

"S-Sige lang..." Bahagya akong nautal. "I'm almost done with my food anyway."

Agad siyang umupo sa kaharap kong single couch. As usual, he was drinking iced Americano. Naalala ko no'ng pinatikim niya ako noon. I was so curious with its taste even though I knew it was bitter because he liked it so much. Hindi ko inaasahan na sobrang pait pala talaga ng timpla no'n. In the end, he just bought me sweets to cleanse my palate.

Now that I recalled how sweet and caring he was to me before, hindi mo talaga aakalaing niloloko na niya pala ako. The natural sweetness of these playboys could make a fool out of you.

"You still like dark mocha frappe?" puna niya ng mapansin ang aking inumin. "And waffles, of course. Parang wala pa ring nagbago sa'yo."

Saglit akong napangiti. "I don't think so..."

He chuckled lightly. "Right... I actually heard rumors about you," he suddenly said. "Kahit na magkaiba tayo ng school ay umabot sa akin ang mga nangyari sa'yo."

My brows shot up. "And what exactly are those rumors?"

"A friend of mine is close with Romeo. I'm sure you know him."

Romeo, huh?

"Of course."

"Ang sabi ay pinagsabay mo raw si Romeo at ang best friend nito," panimula ni Chance at sa paraan ng kanyang pagku-kuwento ay para bang hindi siya naniniwala roon. "Noong akala ni Romeo na puwede na kayo dahil break na kayo ng best friend niya, iyon pala ay niloloko mo rin siya."

Tumawa si Chance. I could tell that he really didn't buy that story.

"But of course, I didn't believe them," he told me. "Kilala kita. I know you wouldn't do that. You're a loyal person. Alam ko 'yon dahil ako mismo, naranasan ko kung paano ka magmahal. You wouldn't dare look at other boys. More so, date them while you're in a serious relationship."

The smile remained on my lips. Chance noticed that so, he stopped laughing and became serious. His brows furrowed.

"Don't tell me it's true?" tanong niya nang makaramdam sa aking pananahimik.

Bumuntong hininga ako habang tumatango. Mas lalo siyang hindi makapaniwala nang makuha ang kumpirmasyon galing mismo sa akin.

"But I'm done playing now so..." I assured him. "Talagang gusto ko lang maglaro noon. I don't feel engaging myself in a serious relationship—"

"Is it because I cheated on you?"

Nawala ang ngiti sa aking labi nang napaawang ito. My eyes stared straight into his. Kanina ay pinipigilan ko pa ang sariling tumingin sa kanyang mga mata, pero ngayon ay hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko. His eyes were filled with regret and guilt. No words needed. I could tell that he was blaming himself.

"I know I've been a jerk to you..." he said with a voice so forlorn. "I never got the chance to apologize to you. All I did was to reason out, try to justify why I cheated and be a complete asshole which only pushed you more away from me."

Hilaw akong tumawa. Umiling ako para lamang gumaang ang aming mga dibdib at matigil ang pagbabalik-tanaw sa nakaraan. I didn't want to dwell on the past anymore. I wasn't sure if I was ready to open the wounds I've forcefully stitched before just to conceal the pain.

"Chance, it's all in the past now. It's okay—"

"No, it is not okay, Keia!" His voice was stern and full of authority. "When I realized how much I hurt you and that you're never coming back to me no matter what I do, it broke my heart, too. I blamed myself for everything. Even my mother disowned me for being a jerk that time."

I tried so hard to suppress my feelings. My tears were just hanging around the edge of my eyes.

"All the times I told you that I love you... I meant those words. They were all true," he said and it was one of the sincerest things I heard from him. "When we were together, you made me happy. I felt how much love you gave me. You helped me realize my worth as a man. And I'm very sorry if I failed to keep my promises. I'm sorry for hurting you."

It was impossible for me now to stop my tears from falling. If I was so scared earlier to bring back the past, it felt different now.

Ngumiti siya sa akin at marahang inabot ang aking kamay. "Gusto kong sabihin sa'yo na hindi ka nagkulang. Sadyang hindi lang ako nakuntento o sabihin na nating masyado akong kampante na hindi ka mawawala sa buhay ko," pag-amin niya. "Never knew that I was wrong until I lost you."

Never thought that I'd need this closure when I thought it was better to just accept things and move on to the next chapter of my life without putting a dot on the last word of the previous chapter. Now, I realized that it was important to have a closure. I finally had a sense of clarity about what we had. And suddenly, all my insecurities subsided like a miracle.

"I regretted failing to keep you before, but whatever what happened it the past, I'm very much thankful because I think, I became a better man after that..." he told me and slightly chuckled before he continued. "And a better father."

My eyes widened with his sudden revelation. Did I really just hear him right?

Mas lalo siyang natawa sa reaksyon ko bago binitawan ang aking kamay. He pulled out his phone from his pocket. Ilang beses niya itong pinindot bago inabot sa akin.

With my hands shaking, I accepted his phone and was greeted with a picture of a young family. I recognized the woman who was holding the beautiful baby girl right away. He was the woman he cheated with when he was still in a relationship with me. The woman I caught him kissing inside the bar.

When my eyes drifted to Chance in the picture, his smile was so priceless. Sa ngiti niya pa lang, nakikita kong masaya at kuntento siya sa kung anong mayroon siya ngayon. He became a better man, after all.

I didn't know why I didn't feel anything bad about it. Hindi ako nasasaktan. Hindi rin ako nagagalit. All I felt was pure happiness for his little family which brought me another set of tears.

"Why are you crying?" natatawang tanong sa akin ni Chance at hindi ko namalayang nakalapit na pala siya sa akin.

One of his knees was knelt on the floor. Ang kanyang kaliwang braso ay nakatukod sa kanyang hita habang ang kanang kamay ay ginamit upang punasan ang aking luha. He was chuckling, but I could see his concern for me.

"I'm happy for you..." I told him, sincerely.

I smiled through my tears.

He gently pulled me for a hug. We were already gaining a lot of attention from the people who were near us, but we didn't mind it. Hinayaan kong yakapin niya ako.

"Thank you, Keia," he whispered on my ear. "Falling in love with you is one of the best things that happened in my life. I assure you that."