Edited

Published: Thursday July 23 2015 8:23 p.m

Jafar:

July 13th

"Batting? You want to take her to a place with those sticks and throwing machines?"

"What's wrong with that?"

Jamila huffed and placed the floor, I could feel the glaring daggers directed at me.

"Taking your wife somewhere to hit things isn't classified as romantic."

"As long as she's not hitting me, I'm fine."

I do admit when I came up with the idea last night it sounded bizarre and different, but it's a good way to relieve stress. Plus, Ayah used to play little league.

"Jafar, when you asked me to help, I thought romantic dinners, midnight walks, stuff like that. But never would I think murdering a ball would get her to shout 'forgive me.'"

I sighed and walked over to the counter to grab my phone. I know she's right, but I want us to do something fun. And it just so happens both of us like baseball. Before I start with any of the romantic stuff, I want us to have fun.

"I know you did, and I appreciate it, but can we think of that stuff once we're past the awkward stage?"

"Fine, but--"

"No buts," I smiled and placed my hnds on her shoulders. "I made up my mind."

"Well, you better not mess it up."

"I'll try my best not to."

-*-

Ayah:

Bring your batting gloves, I'll be over in an hour-Jafar

Batting? He's taking me batting for our first date?

Wow, that's the first time I referred to today as a 'date.' It's weird really. With all the movies I watch, the books I read, I never imagined myself doing something close to a first date. I've always pictured me and my husband--I didn't know I was going to marry Jafar at the time--remaking all the cheesy scenes. I even imagined him having a motorcycle, but unlike the girls who always call them 'death machines,' I would embrace the opportunity to enjoy the wind blowing through my hijab. It's amazing what a twelve year old could think.

"Mama, can I talk to you?"

Mama looked up from her book, nodding and motioning for me to sit down next to her on the bed.

"What can I do for you?"

"It's Jafar," I sighed. Mama looked up at me and smirked slightly.

I thought so. Did something happen?"

"No," I shook my head. "We're suppose to go out today--batting?"

"Batting?" She smiled. "That sounds...different. But a good different."

"It is, but am I letting him off too easily? Am I moving too fast with forgiving him, or should I just relax and let nature take its course?"

"It's all about following your heart. If you feel he deserves a second chance, and if you love him enough to give him that chance then go for it. Don't do it because you feel bad or you're pressured."

Despite everything's that's happened, I do love him. I do want to forgive him. I also want to know where this leads.

-*-

As Jafar said in the text, he came an hour later and picked me up for our 'date.' He even came and opened the door for me. Is my fantasy coming true or what? The car ride there was silent, but a comfortable one. We just sat and listened to Maher Zain's faint voice throughout the car, and the song just so happens to be 'For the rest of my life.'

Okay, I admit the car got a little awkward after that. As we passed by the outskirts of town, we could see a carnival being set up.

Tehreem would love to take the kids there." Jafar spoke, occasionally glancing at me and not at the road. "Maybe we could take them sometime?"

I looked up at him to see a hopeful expression on his face, but it was replaced with a frown at my silence.

"Maybe," I whispered and turned to look out the window. It's not that I don't want to take the kids out with him, it's more of having to know how today goes before I agree to anything. What if today goes horrible? What if I get hurt swinging the bat, or I end up hurting him with the bat? There are so many possibilities and 'what ifs' that we just have to go slow.

-*-

"Have a nice day," The guy at the front desk smiled at us after giving Jafar and I wristbands to go to the cages. Okay, we're actually doing this.

"Are you nervous?" Jafar raised an eyebrow, but you could see the amusement clearly on his face.

"What? No," I lied. I am very nervous. I did play little league when I was younger, but then again I was only about nine. "I'm ready to do this," I smiled confidently, but in the inside I was ready to make a run for it.

Jafar just smiled at me. "If you say so."

-*-

"Ahh, it's going to hit me!" I screamed and glared at the machine that's currently pelting me with baseballs. Jafar's standing on the outside of the cages trying his best to contain his laughter but failing. I take back what I said about being nervous. The balls are coming out every ten seconds, and I so far have hit a total of...

Wait for it...zero. I haven't hit anything after being in here for like fifteen minutes of pain and annoyance. I don't remember it being this hard to hit. I try all the things I used to do before--bending my legs and keeping my eye on the ball. Nothing is working!

"I know you can hit it, Ayah. Just choke up on the bat and get ready?"

I turned to look at him in horro. "You want me to swallow the bat then choke on it?!" I exclaimed in disgust. My outburst must have sent him over the edge, because as soon as he heard me, he bent over in laughter. Is that really what he wants me to do? I barely can hit the ball, and now he wants me to consume the stick I'm using?!

"Can you stop laughing and help me?" I whined.

While still laughing his head off, Jafar nodded and came inside the cages to me. But because he was too busy laughing at me, he forgot the machine was on and got hit in the back. It's a good thing it was on low.

"Ow!"

Now the roles are reversed with me laughing and him groaning in pain. Well, you know what they say. Karma's a—

"That actually hurt," Jafar winced at the no doubt stinging pain on his back.

"Are you okay?" I asked between laughs and he shrugged.

"I'll live, but come on. Let's show you how to hit a ball."

"You may want to pause the machine first."

Jafar nodded and went for the pause switch, dodging another ball during his journey a few feet away. As he jogged back inside to me, he grabbed the bat and held it in his stance.

"Now, when you're batting, you need to bend your knees like this," He told me, showing me how his legs are bent. "Next, you choke up on the bat with your hands, watch me," He moved his hands up on the bat. He kept watching my reaction as it reigned in me what 'choking up on the bat' meant.

"Now you try."

I took the bat from him, mimicked his stance and swung the bat to get a feel for it.

"You're doing great, Masha Allah. Now I'm going to turn the machine on medium. If I go back to low, we will be waiting all night for the ball to get across the plate."

"Okay," I nodded and took a deep breath.

"It's on. Remember, concentrate and swing level."

After waiting a minute for the machine to warm up, the ball came towards the plate, and I swung with all I had and...missed.

"I can't do this," I stepped back from the plate and started to take off the helmet and batting gloves. Maybe this wasn't such a great idea. Nothing seems to be going right. When Jafar came in earlier, he hit every ball that came his way. All I did was stand there and make a fool out of myself.

"What if I helped you?"

Pausing from ripping the little equipment I had off, I turned to stare at Jafar who happened to be standing right in front of me.

"It's a waste of time. You already tried to help but I couldn't hit it. I just can't do it."

"Yes you can, and you know why?"

I played along. "Why?"

"Because you have the best teacher there is, so come on."

Jafar stretched out his hand to me, and surprisingly I took it which put a smile on his face. Pulling me along with him, he grabbed the bat and moved me in front of the plate and handed me the bat. Thinking he was going to guide me in the position he did earlier, I froze when he wrapped his arms around my waist and whispered instructions in my ear.

"Now, choke up like this," He placed his hands over mine, moving them up a notch on the bat. "Great. Now look over to the machine and wait for your pitch."

Jafar then let go and moved to turn on the machine I didn't even knew he turned off back on. I then hid my face from anyone's view. If they saw me, they would think I swallowed a lemon.

Seconds later, the ball came. Eyeing it up, I swung the bat as hard as I could, dropping it when I felt a vibration in my hands.

"See?" Jafar smirked, "You hit it."

-*-

After a couple of hours of non-stop ball murdering, we stopped by the Dairy Queen for a snack.

"I never asked. How is your career?"

Jafar was taken aback by my question, but smiled nonetheless.

"It's going really well, Alhamdulillah. When I first started, I barely had a gig, but as I continued my journey, Allen booked me to open for big time names. I'm not really famous, just known in the music industry."

"I've seen many people, mainly girls fawning over you. You are a little more than known."

Jafar chuckled. "I love my fans, but I try not to think about the creepy ones."

"They're a handful," I pointed out. "Especially all the commenters on Jamila's blog."

"You know about that?" He asked and I smiled sheepishly.

"I helped her create it."

It was about a month after he left, the time when we were communicating like twice a day and I wasn't very upset with him. Jamila always wanted to make a blog and say whatever she wanted, and I wanted something to do. There aren't many things to do in a small town where the populations consist of elderly people.

"We were both anxious to experiment with something but we didn't have a topic. When you started to make your way up in California and repeat stuff that Allen told you to say, we couldn't help but write the truth."

"Were you the one who put that I was indeed married?"

I lowered my head in embarrassment and nodded.

"Don't be embarrassed. I like how you wanted to claim what was yours."

"I didn't like how you were to tell lies. I also didn't like the hurt of knowing that the words 'I'm single' came out of your mouth."

"I didn't want to say it, but in the messed up minds that are this world, they reacted to what I said by buying albums and going to concerts," He told me softly.

"That is messed up," I laughed. "But now that I hear why you did it..."

"Yeah?"

"It doesn't hurt any less," I stated and he grimaced. "I don't blame you for doing whatever necessary to get your career off the ground, but what you had to go through—what Allen had you do was messed up."

"I agree."

"Can you promise me that you won't do anything too crazy anymore? Not having a say over your life is...suffocating."

"It's not that bad—"

"It's not you," I told him. "You're the voice that makes everyone want to listen—all you. Don't let anyone change that again."

Smiling at me, Jafar took my hand and placed a kiss on it.

"I missed you."

-*-

Jafar:

Jafar 1

Jamila 0

Despite my sisters urge to show me how wrong today could have gone, I have proved her wrong. Even though going to the batting cages didn't seem like the ideal romantic thing to do, it gave me a chance to have some fun with my wife. Just saying that name for her makes my heart swell. She's everything for me and more.

Why did I ever leave her? I forgot how much fun we used to have. The Ayah that was laughing and talking with me today is the Ayah I missed. I haven't seen that side of her since before I left, before I told her of Allen's offer. I think that's when everything started to change.

Now as we drive back to Riverside, I can't help but smile at the site of Ayah curled up in the front seat asleep. We've literally been out all day. From leaving at around noon to now coming home just after Maghrib, I couldn't have asked for a better day.

-*-

"Ayah," I shook her lightly, trying to wake her up for about five minutes. Um Ayah stood at the door shaking her head at the sight of her daughter. "Ayah?"

"She's better off just sleeping the car," Um Ayah commented. "Believe me, trying to wake her up is a task."

"Let me try something before we camp her out in the car all night."

Um Ayah raised her hands in defeat, smiling. "Be my guest."

Clicking her seatbelt off, I put one hand under Ayah's thighs and another behind her back and proceeded to carry her inside.

"I'll get her purse," I nodded at my mother in law and made my way to her room.

I set her down gently on her bed and started to move towards the door when her hand stopped me.

"Thank you," She yawned.

I smiled, took off her shoes and pulling her covers over her. I placed a kiss to her forehead.

"You're welcome."

"Can you stay?" Ayah suddenly asked as I was on my way out. She lifted up into a sitting position and took a deep breath.

"I don't think that's a good idea," I shook my head. It wasn't. As much as I wanted to be with her again, I didn't want to rush into anything and put us dozens of steps farther than we already are.

"I'm sure. It's been too long," She moved over into the bed making room for me, and I caved, walking forward and sitting on the bed. I took my shoes off and slowly laid down.

And so we laid there, each of us not knowing what to do and how to proceed. After months it had been strange to welcome each other back, but something about the situation of us here together made it all okay. She was okay. I was okay. We were okay.

-*-
There's a special day coming up...

If you guessed my birthday, you got it right. I feel so old, lol. I will try my best to update on that day Insha Allah.

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