52 - The Odd Couple
Dinner that night at Shell Cottage turns into a celebration of mine and Fred's engagement.
Bill gets the bubbly out of the cellar as soon as Fred and I arrive back and announce the happy news.
"We were saving it for our first anniversary," Bill says as he pops the cork, "but I think tonight it is called for."
I glance at Fleur and am surprised to see she's not annoyed, but instead smiling warmly at Fred and me.
"Love iz everything," she says throatily, glancing adoringly up at her husband as he pours the champagne into flutes. "It deserves celebrating."
Fred pulls his arm around me and we share a look which makes my heart simply melt. His brown eyes are so full of love as he lifts my left hand and presses his lips to the ring on my finger.
Just as I'm feeling sad that the rest of Fred's family can't be here with us, there is a banging at the front door.
Once Bill interrogates them, George, Ginny, Charlie, Molly and Arthur come traipsing in, faces alight with happiness as they rush towards Fred and me, engulfing us in hugs and congratulations.
"The minute Fred told me he was coming to see you tonight," Molly smiled brightly as she affectionately pinched my cheek, "I knew there would be celebrations to be had."
"Mum, she might have said no." George interrupts, winking at me. "Then this would be awkward."
"What- to this gorgeous face?" Fred chuckles as he hugs his twin. "Never!"
George turns to hug me next, and he squeezes me surprisingly tight. "Thank you for making him happy." He murmurs quietly in my ear, his voice thick with emotion.
He holds me a fraction tighter before he lets go. I am surprised to see his eyes are red and watery.
"George, are you crying?" I tease, poking him playfully in the ribs.
"It's just a touch of hayfever," George sniffs, wiping his eyes. "And by Merlin, you two should have done this ages ago!"
"Sure, George," Fred chuckles, draping an arm around my shoulders, "just a shame Hogwarts never installed that wedding chapel in time."
"They could always put it next to the maternity ward?" I suggest, grinning coyly.
"You two aren't-?" Molly gasps, her eyes dropping to my stomach.
"Mum, we haven't even seen each other in eight months," Fred mutters, "if she were then you would definitely know."
"You'll name your first kid after me though, won't you?" George asks.
"Without a doubt," I say, smiling at the thought of having Fred's babies. "Little George or Georgina. I like it."
"Hey!" Ron says, joining the chat. "I think Ronnie would suit better."
"To Fred and my future daughter in law, Harriet!" Arthur announces, raising his glass. "May they live a long and happy life together."
We all laugh as we chink glasses. Fred and I exchange smiles, warming my heart and soul completely.
"Humans are so weird." Griphook mutters as he downs his champagne in one gulp.
*****
It is almost midnight when Arthur announces that it is time for the celebrations to end.
I feel my throat constrict almost at once as Fred holds me tighter in his arms from where we are cuddled on the sofa. This evening - which has been full of love and laughter - has made me forget the war I'm supposed to be fighting.
"I promise you we'll see each other again soon," Fred murmurs ardently against my ear.
I try and smile but my heart isn't in it. I wish he could stay, but I know we must both get on with our separate roles this war has given us.
I need to put all my concentration into our plan to destroy the Horcruxes, and Fred needs to go and help support the Order. It's a means to an end, and without that end we cannot even contemplate starting our life together.
"I love you," I whisper as we both say goodbye on the doorstep.
"I love you too, Harri," Fred says, cupping my face in his hands. "My beautiful fiancee."
He kisses me in a sweet yet breathtaking way. I sigh against him, wanting this moment to last forever.
But it is sadly over too soon and I lean against the doorframe watching him walk away to the edges of the enchantments with his family and Mr Ollivander, his kiss still tingling on my lips.
"Goodbye, Fred," I whisper as he turns around and vanishes into thin air, the crooked smile on his lips the last thing I see.
*****
When Hermione walks into the kitchen looking like Bellatrix, it takes everything inside of me not to storm across the room and slap her.
"Bloody hell," Ron breathes as he leans against the sink, stroking his newly grown goatee, "I forgot how hot Bellatrix is."
A look of hurt instantly flickers over Bellatrix's face and I smack Ron's arm - hard.
"She is literally an evil cold hearted witch who kills and tortures everyone we know and love!" I seethe.
"Still," Ron shrugs unapologetically as he continues to stroke his beard, "boys like a bad girl as much as the other way around."
Hermione - as Bellatrix - seems to suddenly right herself. "I can be bad," she says, sounding very un-Hermione-like, "would you like me to be bad, Ronald? Or should I call you Dragomir?"
Ron's eyes instantly light up as Hermione slinks towards him across the kitchen, stumbling slightly in her high heeled boots so that she has to steady herself against one of the kitchen chairs.
Ugh. I do not want to be a witness to this sick role play game. Don't they know there is a war going on?!
Next to me, Griphook tuts, clearly as sickened by this disturbing display as I am.
"How long will this batch last?" Ron asks me as we make our way out of Shell Cottage towards the edge of the enchantments. "I mean, do you think there might be time for-"
"For fuck's sake Ron!" I hiss, trying not to wince as Griphook digs his claws into my shoulders from where he is piggy backing on my back. "We don't have time for you to play out your sick fantasies - we need to get this Horcrux!"
I am moody. It has been almost a month since the night Fred came round and proposed - a month of planning this dangerous excursion only for Ron to try and spoil it with his horny cock.
"But she doesn't seem to want to have sex with me when we are just us!" Ron complains, still stroking his goatee. "Just now in the kitchen was the first time I saw that look in her eye - the look that she used to give Krum."
"Oh, what's that about Viktor?" Hermione calls out behind us, struggling to keep up in Bellatrix's get up.
"I was talking about the mess my morning toast makes!" Ron snaps. "Crumbs every bloody where!"
I roll my eyes, thankful when we finally reach the place we can Apparate from.
Being back in Diagon Alley is surreal. My face is on wanted posters literally everywhere - even in Fred and George's derelict shop windows.
"Bloody hell," Ron mutters under his breath. "This place has seriously gone to the dogs."
As we pass by curious eyes, I am grateful to be hidden beneath my Invisibility Cloak, even with Griphook clinging painfully to my back.
"Travers up ahead," Griphook hisses in my ear. "He's another Death Eater."
Ron, Hermione and I freeze as we are approached by a tall, thin wizard with a crown of bushy, grey hair and a long, sharp nose.
Hermione draws herself up to her fullest height. "What do you want?"
Travers stops on his tracks, clearly affronted.
"I merely sought to greet you, Madam Lestrange," Travers says coolly, "but if my presence is not welcome..."
"No, no, not at all," Hermione says quickly, trying to cover up her mistake. "How are you?"
"Well, I confess I am surprised to see you out and about, Bellatrix."
"Really? Why?" Hermione asks.
"Well," Travers coughs, "I heard that the inhabitants of Malfoy Manor were confined to the house, after the... ah... escape."
I experience an unpleasant sensation swoop low in my stomach as I think of Draco.
"The Dark Lord forgives those who have served him most faithfully in the past," Hermione says in a magnificent imitation of Bellatrix's most contemptuous manner. "Perhaps your credit is not as good with him as mine is, Travers."
Travers has the grace to look abashed.
"Who is your friend?" He says, clearly wanting to change the subject as he glances curiously at Ron. "I do not recognise him."
"This is Dragomir Despard," Hermione says just as Ron puffs out his chest. "He speaks very little English, but he is in sympathy with the Dark Lord's aims. He has travelled here from Transylvania to see our new regime."
Travers continues to ask questions and I feel impatient, wanting to get the Gringotts job done before the potion runs out. I am half tempted to hex the twat, but there are far too many witnesses in the street.
So I prod Hermione in the side, urging her to wrap up this conversation quick sharp.
"Ow!" She gasps, twirling around.
"Everything okay there, Madam Lestrange?" Travers asks raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah," Hermione says, rubbing her side. "Just a touch of period pain, you know how it is. Look, if you don't mind, I need to get on. I've a lot to do and I'm desperate to get back to my hot water bottle."
Travers - who has gone bright pink - quickly nods. "Uh- my wife finds chocolate helps. And peace and quiet. I'm banished from the marital bed during the monthly dread - which suits me fine, the moody hag."
Hermione and I both glare at him, despite him not being able to see me.
He exits pretty quick sharp after that.
As we enter Gringotts, Hermione trips and stumbles her way across the vast marble hall of the bank, with Ron having to steady her on countless occasions.
"Are you alright, Madam Lestrange?" The goblin at the counter asks when we finally get there. "You seem a bit... unsteady?"
Hermione giggles, hiding her mouth behind her hand. "Don't mind me, I just had a tipple too many with my Transylvanian friend here."
The goblin's eyes widen as he peers down at them. "But it's nine o'clock in the morning!"
"Not for Dragomir here-" Hermione whispers loudly as she pats a hand against Ron's cheek. "He's still on Transylvanian time and I wanted to make him feel at home."
Playing along (well, at least I think he is), Ron squeezes Hermione's arse and she gives a loud shriek and a giggle.
"Oh, you naughty boy, Dragomir!" She cackles. "I have a husband!"
"Ee is velcome to join." Ron said in a really bad and unconvincing accent.
I roll my eyes as Griphook hisses in my ear. "They need to get on with this, now!"
So, no longer having the patience to wait, I flick my wand at the goblin and whisper, "Imperio!"
Turns out, casting an illegal curse is easier than I thought it would be. Before we know it, we are travelling underground, the cart hurtling us towards Bellatrix's vault.
I do my calculations. Once we get the Hufflepuff cup, all we have left to do is find a Ravenclaw item, kill the snake, and then Voldemort himself.
I'll be on that houseboat with Fred, drifting down the canal in no time.
"Where to next?" Ron shouts to me as we fly out of Gringotts on a dragon, clutching the Hufflepuff cup.
"TO HOGWARTS!" I declare, pumping my fist in the air as the wind whistles around us.
Sadly, the dragon doesn't do directions, and instead ends up dumping us in a lake.
*****
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