Roger and I couldn’t find any laundry detergent and so he yelled upstairs to John and Veronica.

 “I swear you act like you’ve never been in this house before!” Veronica yelled back to us.

 “Well, I for one, have never been in your basement tryin’ to operate your washer!” Roger insisted.

 “It’s in the basket between the washer and dryer!” Veronica yelled back.

 “Seriously, darling! You need to put the dumb blonde away for the night! You’ve outdone ya’self.” Freddie called down the stairs to Roger.

 “Freddie! Don’t you have a comfortable guest bed to…I don’t know…be in!?” While Roger fought with Freddie, I was determining the best place to spread these blankets out. At this point, the middle of the floor was looking pretty good. It wasn’t a large basement anyway and Roger and I would nicely between the hot water tank and the washer and dryer.

 “Rog? Rog, dear? Can you hear me? Rog? Rog?” Freddie asked repeatedly.

 “Freddie! Shut the hell up! Yes! I can hear you! I’m ignoring you! Go to bed!” Roger hissed at him as he threw our wonderfully smelling, yet gooey clothes in the washer.

 “Does this look okay?” I asked Roger, referring to the mass of blankets in the floor. Roger shook his head.

 “Lyd…it looks exactly like a bunch of blankets in the floor. It’s really great. I’ll be back.” Roger said, taking all of our bathroom toiletries upstairs to the guest bath since that was the only other bathroom aside from the one in John and Veronica’s room. I would follow him up shortly. He would likely drop half of that going up the stairs and I would pick it up in his trail. Earlier, I had brought a glass of water down here with out second trip and laid it near the pale colored compact near the wall. It was nearly four in the mornin’ and there was no way I was going to flop upstairs in five and a half hours to take this pill. I made sure to sit this glass far enough away so neither myself or Roger would knock this over in the middle of the stairs. The washer sloshed away and I headed back upstairs. I poked my head into the guestroom to check on Freddie.

 “Isn’t this just a fabulous room, dear?” he asked me.

 “Oh yeah…it much be nice.” I told him sarcastically. I proceeded up the next set of stairs.  I could hear the water running in the bathroom and I noticed John and Veronica’s door shut. “Did they go to bed already without sayin’ nothin’?” I was rather surprised. Brian was lying down on the couch and Chrissie was lying up against him. He couldn’t keep his fingers out of the belt loop on her jeans. “Do you all want anythin’ while I’m standin’ here? I’m just waitin’ on Roger. I watched Brian rest the weight of his head on top of Chrissie’s. I wasn’t going to anythin’ but I knew where this was goin’.

 “No, no thanks. And to answer your question; yes. I'm fairly certain they fell asleep the moment they laid down.” Chrissie answered referring to John and Veronica.

 “This kitchen is a disaster! It’s like we had a New Year’s Eve party or somethin’. I…I don’t even know where the sink is!” I noticed as Roger finished up in the bathroom. He came out which meant I could wash my face, brush my teeth and brush my long hair out.

 “I’ll see you two in the mornin’.” Roger said to Brian and Chrissie as he stumbled back down the stairs. He stopped off to the guestroom where Freddie was stayin’. I stared at myself in the mirror as I turned the sink on. I definitely looked like I had been drinkin’ all night.  I proceeded to get my face washed. I could smell the remnants of Roger's soap in here. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, sucking in what remained of it. I opened my eyes slowly and let my head roll limply around. To me, Roger was a pure aphrodisiac in my veins more powerful than any force. I continued to let the water run as I stared myself down in the mirror.

 In the living room, Brian and Chrissie realized the city lights were pouring in through the sliding glass door the townhouse. “I’m gonna’ close those blinds, yeah?” she asked Brian. He shook his head as she got up from the couch to close the vertical blinds. Chrissie returned to the couch, Brian taking her under his arm. They had two pillows jammed underneath them and the blankets Veronica had left them were still neatly folded on the floor. I finished up in the bathroom and turned the light out.

 “Do you want this kitchen light out?” I asked.

 “Yeah, please.” Chrissie told me. I killed the kitchen light only to realize I could hardly see the stairs. It was alright, I’d figure it out.

“Don’t do anythin’ I wouldn’t do…and if you do, please…tell me all about it.” I said as started down the stairs.

 “ ‘Night, Lydia.” Brian said. Freddie had already closed the door to the guestroom. That was the thing about drinkin’ as much as we had; you certainly fell asleep quickly. Freddie was completely out already considering not even the slightest sound could be heard. I turned out the light and closed the basement door behind me.

 “Lyd! I put those clothes in the short cycle! They’re already in the dryer.” Roger told me even though I could barely see him.  He was so proud of himself. “It’s just like you taught me how to do!”

 “Good, now where are…oh! There you are.” Roger put his arms around me. He kissed me very softly, working his way down my jaw and to my neck. I could feel his hands all over my back, working his fingers underneath my shirt. His touch was as soft as his kiss and it was driving me mad how much I wanted him. I allowed my hands to wander all over him, matching the softness of his touch. I knew…I knew it would make him weak. I managed to run my hands down his back and around his waist. Faint light from the alley leaked in around the small curtain that covered the window but not much at all. His pants were ridiculously soft as I teased him with my fingers barely inside his waistband. He tugged on my sides a bit and motioned me to the floor with him. He pulled my shirt over my head and I could feel the cool metal of his bracelet against me. I don’t know what came over me. “Roger…” I said through gritted teeth barely above a whisper. I dug my fingers into him, pulling his body on top of me. There was nothing safer in the world, than the weight of him on me.

 Chrissie was lying on top of Brian on the couch. He had his arms around her; her lips locked on his. It was far brighter in the living room than it was the basement. The noise and lights of the city filtered in through the blinds in vertical lines. Chrissie and Brian could see each other’s faces in the pale light. It was very quiet, so quiet in fact; Brian could almost hear Chrissie sigh for him in the midst of their passion-laced kiss. She trembled in his arms because she could hardly control her urge. Chrissie could tell that Brian was being cautious as to where his hands went on her. Hell, she didn’t want him to be cautious but she didn’t know how to express that either. They broke their kiss but Chrissie left her lips resting on Brian’s; her forehead tilted in against his.

 “Brian…”she started softly. “…I can feel your heart beatin’.” Chrissie could smell his hair as she moved her forehead slightly against his. It was a combination of Freddie’s cigarette and something deep and masculine. Chrissie moved her hand from Brian’s shoulder to the long vertical ribbing in his sweater. She pulled her fingers slowly down the fabric until she had reached the edge. Chrissie barely moaned as she moved her fingers underneath his sweater to Brian’s smooth skin. She closed her eyes and swallowed hard as she moved her hand over his stomach…higher…higher. His skin was so warm under her touch. She bunched his sweater up around his chest until Brian had no choice but to take it off. Chrissie helped pull it over his head though it was a bit awkward. She thought certainly, she would faint at the sight of his naked chest. Chrissie touched her lips to his neck. This was the break she had needed for the past month but just couldn’t muster up the courage. She let her lips trace over Brian’s collarbone, feeling his tender fingers in her hair.

 “Shit…shi….shit….” I panted mercilessly as I held on to Roger’s head. My heart was racing. “Oh…Rog….Roger…I’m sorry…I’m…” I was laying there a bit limp. “I’m sorry…” I repeated breathlessly. What had happened? We wanted each other a little too much…wanted each other a little too quickly.

 “Ssshhhh…ssshhh…it’s…” Roger breathed out in heavy heaves. He kissed me. I could feel his hot breath hitting my neck.“…s’okay.” He kissed me again, barely taking his lips off my jawbone. “S’alright…” his voice was shuttered a bit as he kissed me “God, Lyd...” I could feel the weight of him sink into me some more. He kissed me once more as I let my hands comb through his hair. My head was spinning as the rhythmic sound of the dryer’s ‘ka-dunk’ mesmerized both of us. We were nestled in the thick blanket I had laid down earlier but wonderin’ there the hell the other one went. My breathing had nearly returned to normal. I felt around for our other blanket, finding it and throwing it over Roger. I moved my hands down to his shoulders and held to him tightly.  He lifted his head up to face me. I could feel his necklace scratchin’ against me. Although I couldn’t really see him, I knew he was lookin’ right at me.

 “Lydia…I gotta’ tell you somethin’...” he said very softly.

 “Mmmm…’kay.” My voice was relaxed and my eyes heavy.

 “I…” he paused. I could still feel his breath. I knew he was so sleepy right now. “I love you.” My entire body froze. I could feel a sense of nausea overtake me. Panic immediately swept over my body. What the hell did he just say? I knew I wasn’t saying anythin’ and this silence felt like eternity. Was it the coke talkin’? No. It had been too long ago. We were both drunk but…Roger knew what he was sayin’, I could tell. Shit. Oh shit. No. In my experience, every good relationship immediately fell apart after the I love you’s. The truth was…I was not only crazy about Roger but I did love him. I never wanted him to know it. It was too risky. There was still silence as I fought horribly with my conscience: let him love you. No, don’t! Keep your distance. Let him in, Lydia. No! Keep your walls built high, Lyd. You need to let him love you a little. No! Love won’t work for you.

  I had to think fast. In this very moment, I had two choices: I could let my past demons haunt me forever and never say it back; potentially throwing away everything Roger and I had up to this point. Or, I could gamble my heart and live in this moment. I had to take own advice: light another cigarette and let yourself go. I could feel his hair against my face, his breath on my cheek and painful blue eyes waiting for me to say something.  I swallowed hard and trembled all over. The only time I’d been this nervous was the first date I had with Roger. However, something flooded me. If I said those three words; a burden would be lifted from me. I sighed heavily.

 “I love you, too…Roger. I love you so much…” I wasn’t shakin’ anymore. I was holdin’ on to him as tightly as I could.

 Chrissie had traded places with Brian. Long curls tickled her shoulders. Thank god John and Veronica’s couch was larger than a typical size or they would not fit here at all. Most of Chrissie’s clothes had ended up in the floor. She held Brian’s face in her hands, the outside light casting a faint glove over him. “I think I could look into your eyes all night.” She whispered. He kissed her softly.

 “Chrissie…you’re so sweet.” He kissed her again. She laughed sweetly.

 “Don’t be mad, Brian.” She said lightly scratching her fingernails over his back.

 “No, no…don’t discredit yourself. You are. You’re like an angel.” Chrissie could tell…Brian was nervous. So, naturally she asked.

 “Why you nervous right now? You don’t wanna’ do this?” she asked pushing his hair behind his ears. Her voice was so calming.

 “Huh? Oh, god no! No! I mean…yes! YES! I…want…I mean no! That’s not…shit. Yes, I want to like you have no idea but...every man worries he won’t meet the expectation.” He admitted. Chrissie shook her head.

 “Brian…shut up and make love to me.” It was the dirtiest thing Chrissie had ever said to him and he loved every word.