=???=

"Ooh, welcome back," Hoopa grinned as he zipped around me in a circle. "How was the first day of your journey?"

I almost stumbled back from the sudden appearance of the Legendary, and I was confused for the briefest of seconds before I recognized the yellow plane of existence surrounding me... And then recalled the deal.

"You!" I shouted, stalking up to Hoopa. "You caused my Fennekin to disappear! And my Pidgey! And, what, replaced them? With an asshole bird and a hippo with allergies? What the hell—"

"Okay then, now now, calm down," Hoopa chastised as it backed away smoothly (damn its levitation). "I come here to be nice and check up on you, because even though I'm a busy Pokémon I can be nice at times, and you hurl accusations towards me? Geez, you humans get so uppity at times."

I stared at it for a second in angry disbelief. "My Fennekin is missing. Gone. Went poof, and in its place, a Taillow," I hissed. "I was holding on to my Fennekin's Pokéball the whole time, you can't say that somebody stole it. You caused this."

"Um... Duh?" Hoopa shrugged its shoulders nonchalantly. "Yeah, I 'caused' this. 'Course I did. I mean, you did ask for it—"

"I did not!"

Hoopa snorted, a smug smile on its face as it shook its head. "Yeah, you did. You're the one who asked to meet lots of Pokémon from around the globe, didn't ya?"

I opened my mouth to retort back, but then Hoopa stuck a piece of rolled-up paper in my face.

"You even signed and all," Hoopa smirked. "A signed contract is a done deal, Alix. See, this is why I like paper contracts over voice ones, easier to prove deals."

At this point, I was vibrating with anger. Getting swindled into a faulty deal would kinda do that. The whole deal was a blow to my pride, and I was desperate to regain it. "... I want out," I finally snapped.

"You want what? Uh, no?" Hoopa tossed the contract back, where it floated into a ring and disappeared. "I just gave you the chance to meet the rarest Pokémon that aren't even native to your land, and you want out?"

"Yes!" I threw my hands in the air. "My Fennekin is God-knows-where, probably out scared in the wild, and if the labs find out I lost them—!"

"Hush hush hush." Hoopa zoomed into my face and placed a hand on my face. "Clearly, you don't get how my blessing works." I scowled at the word 'blessing', but Hoopa continued. "Now, none of the Pokémon you've caught — and will catch — are in the wild. In fact, all Pokémon you get used to belong to other humans." Hoopa cocked its head. "Get it so far?"

"... So you're basically stealing Pokémon for me." Great. Off to jail I go.

"Well, it's not exactly a 'lemme steal your Pokémon because I can' situation'," Hoopa shrugged, "and more of 'lemme take your unwanted Pokémon, you ungrateful human, so I can use them because you won't'. See, it's a win-win situation: you get the Pokémon from around the world, and I can do this all myself with little effort and no help."

"That's still stealing!" I groaned, rubbing the bridge of my nose. "There's got to be a way to negate the contract, I can go to jail!"

"That's your problem, not mine," Hoopa snickered. "And there's no way that I'm breaking this contract, this is the best deal I've made with a human in years!"

I stood there in annoyed disbelief as Hoopa devolved from snickering to cackling. Trading without both party's consent and other "stealing Pokémon" crimes like that were very dangerous laws to break; it used to be a huge problem in regions like Orre, Kanto, and Unova, so in turn they dish out huge punishments. And if the labs found out...

"... Is there really nothing I can do to break this contract?" I asked. I had to be calm about this, try to reason this out. "You know; something I can do for you?"

"Please, the best you could do for me is either get me out of this stupid, confined form or let me be more popular with the other higher-ups," Hoopa snorted, waving a dismissive hand. "Because they're so high and mighty and I'm so 'lowly', they like to blame me and the other Legends lower on the food chain for everything. I mean, they're already blaming me for something I clearly didn't do—" It stopped midsentence and stood stark still, as if paralyzed. Then, it scratched its chin in deep thought, frowning.

"What is it?"

"... But I could have her do it," Hoopa muttered, "but then he'll keep bothering me..." After what seemed like an eternity of Hoopa grinding its gears in thought, it clapped its hands in finality. "Fine. There is one way I can potentially break the contract."

I raised an eyebrow. "'Potentially'?"

"Do you want to get out or not?" Hoopa snapped, hands on hips. "Okay. Do you know who Xerneas and Yveltal are?"

"Uh..." Xerneas and Yveltal? The names sounded strangely familiar. "I assume they're Legendaries?"

"Yeah. Not exactly surprised you don't know 'em, they're not huge fans of humans. They're also not huge fans of living beings, and they're always aloof. Which is annoying." It shrugged. "In any case—"

It suddenly clicked. "Oh! Wait, they're the ones with the weird names!" I snapped my fingers in thought. "Right, they were, they were... They represent life and death, and... Nobody has a clear image of what they look like. Other than that they like like a huge 'X' and 'Y'." They both had a shared entry in the book of Legendaries I had, and were also the few that didn't have a sketch of them drawn in. Hoopa's pronunciation of the names was different from my interpretation of them, apparently.

"... Well, you're right on the life and death part," Hoopa replied, shrugging. "Along with Arceus, they basically created life on dear old planet Earth. Then, they decided that life was annoying and shut themselves in as either a tree or a cocoon. They wake up occasionally, but then all they do is complain and act like they're better than everyone."

This guy has a serious superiority complex. "Okay. What about them?"

"Apparently little miss Xerneas is missing."

... Missing? "What do you mean, missing?"

Hoopa blew out an irritated breath. "Once upon a time, Yveltal woke up. His 'death instinct' told him something was wrong, and in fact, it involved his dear sister Xerneas. Or something. I have no clue as to what relationship they have with each other." It shook its head. "In any case... He was right. Xerneas the living tree was missing. Poof. Nowhere to be found."

"And he blamed you," I guessed.

"He threatened to turn me to stone!" Hoopa snapped. "He thought that I brought Xerneas for a joyride through one of my rings and made her disappear forever. My rings don't work that way!" It groaned in exasperation. "And then all the other higher-ups started blaming me, and then it turned into one giant mess."

"So I'm guessing you want me to clear your name?" But how? March up to these Legendaries and advocate on Hoopa's behalf? They'd probably flick me off their high-platform.

"Nah, even better." Its dirty, mischievous smile was back. That couldn't be good. "I want you to find Xerneas for me."

... "What."

Hoopa snickered. "Find Xerneas for me, and I'll break the blessing. That's the only way the contract can be negated. And it'd be nice if you found her as quickly as possible, since, you know... Yveltal isn't the best 'Mon to be around when he's angry. Especially if you're human and all."

"But that's impossible!" I shouted, throwing my hands up. "How am I supposed to know where Xerneas is?"

"Again... Your problem, not mine." Hoopa glanced up, grinning. "And wouldja look at that, it's almost time for you to wake up. Darky's getting a little impatient."

"Wait—!"

Hoopa crossed its arms. "Find Xerneas, reclaim my innocence and break your contract. I don't think that I'll be able to contact you like this after tonight. Or at all. I'll be waiting, Alix!"

=Santalune Forest=

It might've been the first time I've set up a tent before, but I was still pretty proud of my effort. Really, it was just the tent tarp held up by one of the poles, but it did the job. Dressed in a different shirt from yesterday, I packed the tent tarp in its pack and stuffed that in my messenger bag. The clock on the Pokédex said that the time was about 10 in the morning, despite the minimal light filtering through the canopy. A curious Scatterbug poked its head out of the grass after I finished packing up, then disappeared back into the growth.

I rolled the two Pokéballs with the Taillow and Hippopotas in my hand. I'd probably have to explain all this mess to them, if I were to use them. Finding an AWOL Legendary, even despite the task's impossibility, would require the help of other Pokémon. Not to mention, travelling through a region will also require Pokémon. Even if they never belonged to me at first.

I bit down a sigh. No time like the present, right?

"I'm going to take you both out, okay?" I whispered to the Pokéballs. Could Pokémon hear anything even if in their Pokéball? "Don't freak out, and don't run away. I can very easily return you back in here. We just need to talk."

The Pokéballs didn't respond.

With a deep breath, I pointed the Pokéballs out and released them.

The Hippopotas touched land first. He flinched when he touched a wet spot on the grass, but otherwise just looked around keenly at the new surroundings. The Taillow came out flying, first staring at the Hippopotas in bemusement before squinting at me.

"Oh. So I see you've stolen another poor soul," the Taillow hissed, landing on the grass as well. "Honestly, you should be ashamed of yourself. Was I not enough to sate you?"

The Hippopotas sneezed sand.

I almost snapped back a retort, about to stuff this Taillow's stuffy ego in, but I calmed down enough to calmly sit down in front of them. "I just want to talk," I said simply.

"Talk about what? Your future heist? Sorry, I don't interact with scoundrels," the Taillow huffed. "Just return me to my Trainer and we can put this all behind us."

I took a deep breath. This is going to take a long, long time to get this through his thick head. "I did not steal you," I started, words drawn out. "And I can't give you to your old Trainer."

"What! Why not?"

"Because..." I placed my head on my hand, thinking. "Well, where are you from?"

The Taillow snorted. "Really? You ask me that, when we're obviously just in... Ah, what's the forest's name? I'm not that knowledgeable in Hoenn's geography—"

"We're not in Hoenn." Oh, so he's from Hoenn.

He froze, looking up to me fearfully. "We're... Not?"

"No. You're in Kalos," I replied. "That's why I can't exactly return you."

At this point the Taillow looked downright terrified. "I— Kalos? That's... That's north, isn't it? What—" He turned to the Hippopotas. "Why aren't you freaking out? How do you think your Trainer feels right now? This man stole you too!"

"I did not—!"

The Hippopotas shook his head. "I don't have a Trainer," they mumbled. "Just lots of siblings."

"Alright, guys," I clapped my hands to get their attention. "I know I have a lot of explaining to do—"

"Of what?" The Taillow snapped. "How you stole us?"

I returned his scowl. "Can you calm down about me stealing you? I'm going to explain that." The Taillow huffed, but kept silent. "Alright. See, thing is we're stuck together. I never meant to steal you guys..." I glared at the Taillow to not speak. "But instead, whenever I catch a wild Pokémon, they get switched with another, already owned Pokémon. ... It's complicated."

"Mama doesn't like complicated stuff," the Hippopotas hummed.

The Taillow laughed dryly. "Ohhh. I get it now. That's a cute story." He ruffled their feathers, as if to intimidate. "You really couldn't think of anything else? Like, I don't know, someone else stole us and dumped us into your willing hands to get rid of evidence?"

"You know what—" I was practically poised to pounce on the damn bird and strangle him right then and there, but then an idea popped into my head. "... I'll show you."

The Taillow blinked. "You'll what."

Ignoring them, I dug into my bag yet again for another empty Pokéball. The Hippopotas clambered over to sniff my bag as I finally fished out a Pokéball. "Right. Who to catch..."

The same Scatterbug from earlier, now minding its own business, popped out of the undergrowth and poked around the grass, probably for food. It seemed to not notice the three of us. Perfect.

"Alright..." I pointed at the Scatterbug. "I want you... Do you guys have names? Any names at all?"

The Taillow scoffed. "As if I'd tell my name to someone like you—"

"I wanna be named Toshi," the Hippopotas piped up. "I don't have a name, but I wanna be named Toshi."

"Toshi it is." The Hippopotas — Toshi — nodded. "Now, do you know any attacks?"

Toshi frowned. "I don't know how to fight. Mama just said to toss sand to whoever bothers me. It'll blind them."

I shrugged. "It's good enough. Now..." I pointed to the Scatterbug again. "Toss sand to that little guy over there."

He nodded, ambling over. When he was close enough, Toshi sneezed more sand, which caught the Scatterbug's attention. Before it could react, however, Toshi kicked up sand to the Scatterbug's face.

"Is that good?" Toshi called out.

I gave a thumbs up. "Very good! Keep going!"

The Taillow hopped over to see the spectacle and raised an eyebrow. "You know that attack doesn't damage at all. You're just blinding the poor bug."

"I just want to catch it, no reason to attack it," I replied. "And you know, our relationship would be a lot smoother if we knew each other's names..."

"You can tell me yours, but I'm not telling mine." The Taillow rolled his eyes. "I see no reason to say my name."

"Well, I can't just be calling you 'Taillow'. Isn't that really rude in Pokémon standards? Like you calling me 'human'."

"I wouldn't mind calling you Human."

"... Then I'll call you Birdbrain."

The Taillow whipped towards me, flabbergasted. "What?"

"Don't know what else to call you," I shrugged. "Birdbrain is the best I can come up with."

The Taillow squinted at me, then muttered something under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Kris," the Taillow replied. "My name is Kris."

"Lovely name," I noted with a chuckle, in which Kris only scowled. "Now... Out of the way, Toshi!"

Toshi dodged another blind tackle from the Scatterbug, whose eyes were almost shut from the sand. Once he got his footing, he glanced up at me. "Huh—?"

The brief second of distraction let the Scatterbug finally tackle him to the ground, and the two rolled around for a brief moment before sprawling on the grass. I hurled the Pokéball, and it tapped the Scatterbug on the back and sucked it in. Toshi blinked dazedly.

"You okay?" I asked, walking up to Toshi and the still Pokéball to check. Toshi just nodded, rolling over on his stomach to let out an exhausted sigh. "Now, about our new catch..."

"Oh yes, about them getting switched." Kris pecked the Pokéball. "This... Bug is going to be something different?"

"Yeah." I grabbed the new catch, and just like the other times, it vibrated in my hands. "So... Let's get them out."

I tossed the Pokéball upward, and a thin, red streak of energy, with an almost liquid quality, shot out. Kris hopped back warily as the mystery Pokémon revealed itself into another Pokémon I didn't quite recognize: a dazed camel-like creature with a sick shade of green covering their back.

Toshi hummed in surprise, making a face. "She smells weird."

"Don't be rude," I scolded as I crouched down to face the Pokémon. "Hey. You have a name?"

She only blinked lazily at me, looking too preoccupied with something to pay attention.

Kris hopped back again. "I agree; this Pokémon doesn't look nor smell too healthy. And this is what you switch for that bug?"

"I can't exactly choose which Pokémon I get," I argued, flicking on the Pokédex. The display lit up as it scanned the mystery Pokémon. "Oh. She's a Numel."

The Numel, upon hearing the name, glanced up confusedly. Then, as if it just dawned on her, she squinted at me. Unlike Kris's accusatory squinting, hers made it seem like she had failing sight. "... Who're you," she asked in a light, whispery voice.

"I'm..." It was then I realized I hadn't properly introduced myself to my Pokémon. All three Pokémon looked at me (mostly) eagerly for the name. I cleared my throat. "My name's Alix. Goldenrod city. And now, your new Trainer. How about you?"

She kept silent. A puff of smoke flitted out of the hole on her back.

"She looks like a... Mara," Toshi suggested, padding up to her. "I like Mara. Even if you smell weird."

Ignoring the comment, I shifted so that I faced Kris. "So. Believe me now?"

Kris gave a disgruntled sigh as he flapped his wings once more. "... I suppose you didn't steal us. Or, at least, not in a conventional way." He narrowed his eyes at me. "How do you do that?"

"It's complicated." I stood upright, holding up their three Pokéballs. "Right then, we have a forest to hike through. Anyone want to hike with me?"

Mara didn't seem to hear what I said, and Kris muttered something about not liking how my shoulder looked. Toshi dug his nose in newly-created sand, nodding.

I shrugged. "Right then. I'll take it Toshi will walk with me." I held Mara's and Kris's respective ball out and in they went without complaint. Toshi blew out some of the sand off of his snout and padded forward.

Quickly following, I pulled out the map. The yellow routes, green landmarks, and red cities crisscrossed the paper in an organized manner. After the forest and a route was Santalune City. Otherwise, home of one of the Pokémon League gyms. I tapped the edges of the map in anticipation.

Hopefully the rest of the journey will go without a hitch.

***

PokéStats:

Kris
Male Taillow (Original Level: 10)
Guts, Hardy, Loves to Eat
Previously under the care of a veteran Trainer in Hoenn. Prickly and prideful.

Toshi
Male Hippopotas (Original Level: 1)
Sand Stream, Careful, Likes to Thrash About
One of many Pokémon babies in a breeding facility. Retains a childish wisdom.

Mara

Female Numel (Original Level: 14)
Oblivious, Docile, Likes to Relax
Suffering under the effects of recreational drugs her previous Trainer used. Otherwise, the quiet type.

***

Kris, you whiny birb—

And no worries, the Abilities of my Pokémon get worse. I'm fine with Guts and Sandstream (in fact Guts is great), but Oblivious? Not Simple?? ... No worries, it really does get worse.

//otherwise extremely happy that Toshi has 5 perfect IVs

In any case! Toshi's hella fun to write, Mara's is my poor bby, and Kris... We'll get to him later. Hope you enjoyed the chapter, we'll be back in a moment's time! See you guys then!