Idea: Sirius is panicking while trying to suggest marriage but Remus just thinks he wants something or has done something bad and Sirius gets upset and gives up. He leaves anf then Remus realizes what he did
Words: 1090
Warnings: overwhelmed Sirius

I wanted to do a new years special, and then I wnated to do a special for my birthday, and then ended up doing neither :D

Also, ladies and gentlemen and the rest of the genres, for the first time in a literal month I really felt like I wanted to write so here I am, taking the advantage of that

Remus is in the library. He is reading his book and sipping tea from his.mug. He enjoys it, truly. He enjoys this peace and calmness. It makes him relax and it makes his body calm down. It has been hectic lately and there's been a lot of school work that he needs to handle, but he is fine with that for as long as he has these calm moments, purely for himself. 

And then tragically his peace is interrupted when his ever so chaotic boyfriend walks in and over to him. 

Remus can't help but notice Sirius' nervous body language. He isn't screaming or running like he usually does but rather stands there quietly and fidgets with his rings. Sirius is clearly hesitating and he opens and closes his mouth several times like a fish and still doesn't get a word out, so Remus decides to say something instead. "Yes Sirius?" he asks. 

He has only ever seen Sirius act like this when he feels genuinely guilty or nervous. These situations only ever occur when James and Sirius mess up a prank and need Remus' help to cover up the traces. Sirius is always the one they send in these situations because as James says it "You see Sirius it's better you go because just in case something bad happens, you can suck him a little bit and all will be fixed. I do not have that privilege."

Sirius opens and closes his mouth a few times more before sighing. He seems frustrated at himself that he cannot get the word out. Remus is truly amused of his struggle that he can't help but find hilarious and cute. 

"Remus I.." Sirius manages to get out after a ton of stuttering. Sirius sounds afraid. Like he was about to ask something truly unimaginable. Remus is certain it's about a prank so he decides to save both of their time. "What did you and James do this time?" 

However the outcome is unexpected as Sirius looks at him, eyes wide. He seems offended and quickly declines it to have anything to do with a prank. It makes Remus roll his eyes. "Come on don't act so ridiculous just get it out. I'll see what I can do." 

"Remus this is fucking serious you dick! Listen to me-" 

"There's no need to be embarrassed. Just tell me what happened" Remus sighs. He's so done with Sirius' bullshit. 

"Nothing fucking happened you twat!" Sirius yells, getting the sharpest of glares from students around them. Sirius however doesn't seem to care one bit. He is clearly furious and Remus simply cannot understand why he is so mad. 

"Sirius-"

"No! Shut the fuck up! Fuck you! Fuck you all!" he pointed to the people around them. Truly wrong place wrong time. "I hate you so fucking much Remus what the fuck is wrong with you? I'm trying to be serious here and actually talk about something that I care about but you won't even care enough to bother" he hisses darkly at him. Remus is getting pissed himself at Sirius' outburst. "Perhaps if I didn't have to deal with your bullshit all the time-"

"Deal with my bullshit?? Fuck it really was a mistake to even try to talk about marriage. you are fucking impossible" Sirius rolls his eyes, clearly annoyed before he storms out, which of Remus sees the library lady to be more than happy about. He doesn't blame her as after all Sirius was a screaming jerk in the library. 

A bunch of students are staring at him and to them he tells them to mind their own business, to which they quickly obey. Remus is barely ever angry. 

Remus recalls the events in his mind and then realizes something he missed. Marriage? Sirius came here to talk to him about marriage? More importantly, Sirius wanted to marry him. or at least had wanted to. Fuck. 

Fuck fuck fuck fuck. No wonder he was so anxious. Remus really laughed at him and straight up disrespected him when Sirius was trying to talk to him about marriage? Shit. He felt disgusting, really. He never imagined to be the one making Sirius so furious. 

Before he can drown himself in self-pity any more than necessary, he packs his bag and leaves the library to look for Sirius. Sirius is nowhere to be seen, but Remus can guess he'd head to the astronomy tower, so he goes there as fast as he can. 

Soon enough he finds Sirius sobbing in the middle of the room. Damn the poor boy must be overwhelmed, Remus thinks to himself. 

"Sirius" Remus says softly at him, slowly approaching the boy. 

"F- fuck off" Sirius chocked out, sniffling. "It's fucking stupid. Don't even worry about it."

Remus sighs and doesn't leave or even stop approaching. Instead he sits down right next to Sirius and pulls the smaller boy onto his lap and hols him close, because he knows this is the type if comfort the Sirius need and what Sirius likes. 

He plays with Sirius's hair, rubs his back and kisses around his face until the sobbing quiets down and he has Sirius' silent figure on his lap, face hidden deep into Remus' neck.

"I'm sorry my love" Remus begins his apology, "That was really rude of me. I shouldn't have kept interrupting you." When Sirius doesn't say anything or move, Remus takes it as a sign to continue. "I should have actually listened to you and communicate with you, rather than assumed things. I'm sorry I made you cry my star. You are overwhelmed thinking about it all, aren't you?"

Sirius nods as an agreements. 

"About the marriage though. I think we should talk about it aswell. Perhaps right now isn't the best time to do so, but we will in near future, I promise that to you dear. I love you so much" Remus kissed his head. 

"I love you too," is whispered by Sirius into the silence.