Sirius sat bored on his bed. He flipped through today's Daily Prophet with disinterest, even if he didn't read the articles at all. He was lost in thought. The Yule ball was announced last night and Sirius had thought about nothing else since then. He knew who he would most like to invite, but unfortunately everything between the two of them was strange since it happend. When Sirius (really with no bad intentions), of all people, had revealed where Remus was going every month to Snape, they had argued. They had made up a little less than a week ago. That didn't mean that everything was the same as before, let alone that they were together again. It knocked Sirius down, and now he couldn't stop thinking whether it would be a mistake to ask Remus to come to the ball. He didn't know if Remus had any feelings for him at all, and even if he did, if he would dance with him in front of everyone else.

The door opened and with a long sigh, James stumbled inside. He threw himself on his bed and sighed again, louder this time.

"What's up?" Sirius asked absently and put the Daily Prophet aside.

"I wanted to ask Lily about the ball."

"nothing new, next?"

James raised his head and gave his best friend a sad look.

"I couldn't get a word out. It was really uncomfortable." he whispered. "and she just walked away. Was annoyed."

Sirius had to try hard not to start laughing.

"I'm sorry Prongs."

"you're grinning." He sat up and had to grin at the sight of Sirius who tried to suppress his laughter. He sat cross-legged and leaned forward slightly.

"What about you? Are you going to ask Remus?"
"I'm not sure. I don't know if he would say yes."

James shook his head in disbelief.

"Come on, are you serious? Remus already has a crush on you since third grade, do you really think he'd give you a beating?"

"And if he already has someone? And anyway, after everything that has happened who knows if he still has feelings for me at all."

James rolled his eyes. "I don't understand why you don't just talk about what's going on between you now."

"You know what? I'll talk to Remus when Lily goes out with you." With that he slipped off the bed and headed for the exit.

"Then you better think about what to say to him, because it won't take long!" James called after him.

The halls were all already empty when Sirius walked to his next class, charms, which he would have with lily, Remus and Marlene.
He was a bit stressed about sitting in his usual seat, next to remus since everytime they talked it ended up beeing super akward.

The others were already waiting in front of the classroom, chatting and laughing.
Sirius walked right over to his Friends.

"Hey." Remus gave him a brief smile and a tinglish feeling appeard in Sirius's guts.

"Hi." it was akward again, just with one word. Sirius hated it. He just wanted anything to go back to normal.

"So...what class did you have before?" He hated himself for that. Why would he ask Remus such a wierd question? he wasn't talking to a stranger. This was Remus, his Remus. They'd known eachother for so long now, shared beds since first year, had seen eachother in their darkest times and still loved and cared for eachother so deeply, why couldn't they have a normal conversation now?

"divination." Remus shrugged and before it could get even more akward flitwick arrived and let them in the classroom.

The class was pretty boring especially since Sirius couldn't joke around with Remus like he would normally.
On the other hand, he had enough time to think about asking Remus out for the Yule ball.
He came to the conclusion that it might be the only opportunity he had to, at least try, to fix their relationship.
He'd just need to find the perfect time to ask Remus.

Weeks passed without Sirius finding a good moment where he could've asked Remus to go out with him.
There were always some of their friends around, or Remus had prefect rounds, it never was just the two of them alone.

Until one Thursday afternoon, about one week before the ball.
James had detentions and Peter wanted to get some air since he had been stuck inside all day with his homework.
It left Remus and Sirius alone in the common room.

Remus was close by the fire, reading a book and when Sirius came down the stairs he didn't even sit down.

"Hey, Remus can I talk to you?" He was very nervous and had no idea what he'd do if Remus would say no.

Remus layed the book aside and looked at Sirius.
"Sure."

"I wanted to ask you something." Sirius started twisting his hair around one finger. He still didn't know what to exactly say to Remus.

Remus kept quite and just looked at him.

"I was juts wondering...if mabey...if you don't have anything better to do of course you'd like to...well..." he took a deep breath and looked at Remus again.
"would you like to go to the Yule ball with me?"

Remus eyes got big and he looked like he was feeling bad for Sirius.
"oh"

Sirius's heart got heavy. He'll say no. he lost feelings for him, Sirius should've know, he just shouldn't have asked in the first place.

"it's okay, I get it you...you don't need to-"

"no, no, I'm sorry, Sirius I would've really liked to go...I just- someone already asked me and I said yes." it was as if he had ripped Sirius's heart out.
he didn't answer, he felt like if he had opened his mouth he'd just start sobbing.
he just nodded and sat down.

the last week practically flew by and sirius didn't ask nor agreed to a date, which ment, he was going alone.

After James finally had the courage to ask her, lily said yes to going with him. Marlene was going with dorcas, Alice with frank and Mary and Peter were going as friends.
Sirius was pretty close to just not going, but James somehow talked him into it.
So now he was in the great hall on his own while all of his friends were dancing.

He was having his 4th butterbeer and just watched Remus and his date, a ravenclaw called Chris, while they were having fun.
He didn't like beeing here, but had also no right to be mad at Remus, they broke up because of his mistake, and he understood why Remus did that.
At this point, all Sirius wanted, was to leave.

The band started playing a slower song, but while everyone else was still dancing, Remus and Chris came over to his table, still both smiling.
Chris walked away to get something to eat while Remus sat down with Sirius.

"Hey." he sounded like he was out of breath, but at the same time, he gave Sirius the most honest smile he had seen on him in weeks.

"so your date is going good?" He was trying hard to not let the jelousy come through but it didn't quite work.

Remus smile faded a bit.

"yeah, Chris is nice."

"bet he is..."

"listen Sirius, i-"
but Remus didnt get to finish his sentence.

"hey, there wasnt any choclate cake left so i brought you syrup pie." Chris gave him a plate with cake and smiled.

"thank you"

Sirius looked away annoyed.

"Remus hates syrup pie."

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't know-" Chris seemed ashamed and awkwardly rubbed the back of his head.

"no, you don't have to apologize. Sirius, can I talk to you." He glared at him, clearly angry and pulled Sirius with him, out of the hall and away to the school garden.

"what is going on with you?"

Sirius just shrugged. He didn't want Remus to be angry with him, he himself was angry enough.

"you have no right to be mad or jealous, when it took you till one week before the day to ask me out."

Now Sirius wasn't just angry with himself, but also with Remus.

"are you kidding me? I took to long to ask you? you could've asked me out yourself! And if you really prefer this idiot, who doesn't even know the most basic things about you then sure, go ahead back inside to him, I won't be jealous! I'm just saying, syrup pie?! Really?! He should know that chocolate cake is the only cake you eat, because actually choclate is all you eat, and how could he ever take care of you when he doesn't even know that! He could never bring you your favorite chocolate from honey dukes when you're stressed, or anxious, or spent to much time in the libery, because he doesn't know it's just plain dark chocolate! he'll buy you some wierd cookie one or caramel or even white choclate."

he paused, taking deep breaths. He realized how long he was going on and on about chocolate.
Remus seemed surprised as well. At least to surprised to get a word out.

"so, go back inside to your white choclate buying date and have a nice night, I don't care."

Sirius was about to head back in but he suddenly felt Remus's hand around his wrist.

"what if I didn't want to go back to him?"

"what are you talking about?"

"you just spent about two minutes taling about the choclate i like! Sirius, do you know how much i hoped you'd ask me out again because of things like that? You know me better then i know myself and i love you for that!" Sirius cheeks heat up.
Without giving it anymore thought, he pulled Remus closer and just kissed him. Remus kissed back.

For a while they were just standing there, kissing, holding eachother close and don't minding about the snow around them, their cold hands and faces or the ball taking place inside, it was just them, in this moment.