Words: 583

Description: Sirius is an insomniac.

Story:

Oftentimes Sirius would find himself staring up at the canvas cover of his dorm room four poster in the early hours of the morning.

He could hear the other Marauders sleeping around him; Peter's snores, James's rustling and Remus's soft and steady breathing.

God, he wished he could sleep like that. He used to be able to sleep like that. Way back in first year he had this ability to just conk out on demand, basically. James thought it was the coolest thing. Sirius could sleep whenever he wanted to.

But then something changed. Maybe it was the trauma of going back home that Christmas break of '71. His parents weren't the happiest that he was sorted Gryffindor and that he was friends with a blood traitor and a couple of half bloods.

As he got older, it got steadily harder for him to fall asleep. Through a little research with Lily, they found that he probably dealt with insomnia. It was apparently common, but he'd never heard of it before.

His insomnia peaked in the middle of fifth year, right when they got back from Christmas break. He was supposed to spend the two weeks with the Potters, but Regulus had asked him to stay home and he did. And it was the most miserable Christmas break he ever remembered.

It was also the first time his friends really started to notice his sleeping disorder. He would stay up later and later willing himself to keep his eyes closed and fall asleep. He would wake up earlier too, and feeling worse than he had when he finally got a little shut eye.

There were times where he stayed awake all night just watching the changes in the sky, watching the sun rise.

It was Remus, always the most observant one, that noticed first. He started to ask questions and check up on Sirius when he caught him trying to drown himself in coffee.

It was always bizarre to Sirius how much Remus slept. Sure, he needed a lot of sleep, what with his furry little problem. But Remus slept like nobody's business.

Eventually, by the Spring of fifth year, The Marauders were almost positive Sirius was a zombie. He was getting no sleep whatsoever and it was really affecting every aspect of his life.

That summer, he ran away from home and spending the summer with James seemed to really help him. He still didn't sleep a whole lot, but it was better.

It was sixth year that Remus and Sirius started dating. Sirius was a little nervous about it at first as being boyfriends, he knew that Remus would be that much more hyper vigilant and attentive. And of course he was, but it was for the better, really.

And then one night, they had an epiphany. They discovered that when Sirius slept with Remus in Remus's bed, he could sleep.

It was the craziest thing. The feeling of being in Remus's arms and feeling safe and comfortable made him feel at peace. It was like the magic ingredient to his problems.

Over the years, he still had that insomnia every once in awhile and it still took him awhile to fall asleep, but for the most part, he got good quality sleep.

But all of that went away when he went to Azkaban. Because without Remus, without his one beacon of safety and comfort, the cycle started all over again.

+++

Please request: