As I packed the last of my clothes up I let out a sigh. This place had been my home since I came to the US from Russia, I'd shared this apartment with who I thought was my best friend and also with the love of my life at one point. Although there were lots of sniffling I did here, staying up until 4AM watching Rom-Coms and eating away my feelings, this place held so many beautiful memories. It was the first place I read my favourite book, the first place I discovered my favourite band and I was going to miss it.

"You got everything?" Wanda asked as she walked into my room,

"Yeah, all my clothes and books are packed, the moving men will be coming in a few days to get the rest of my stuff and bring it over to California to me" We'd come up with an elaborate plan to ensure that we threw HYDRA off my scent by creating a fake scenario where I'd been accepted into a late University in California, hence the moving.

"Don't mention the C word. I'm going to miss you so much!" Nat let a tear roll down her cheek as she came into the room. "Come one or you'll miss your flight!" she added as she guided me out of the apartment and we flung my bags in the boot of her car. Wanda sat back seat and I took rightful place in shotgun.

"Hopefully now we can get to the bottom of this and have them off your tail" Wanda said as we set off to grab some coffee, "Anyway. I want to talk about the fact that when we first met I thought you were this little innocent girl who wouldn't harm a fly but Sam tells me you're quite the badass" she chuckles,

"Yeah, I don't really fight much but I had to step in to save this goon here" I motioned to Nat, "Nothing much else I could do really. We both got trained the same but like what was said at breakfast, I was kicked out of the academy. When I first left I just trained on my own, kept up with everything but then settled down and realised I didn't have to do that, that I could live my own life" I explained.

"In the nicest way possible Arielle, you don't have a life! You stay at home reading or watching stupid shows all the time" Nat interjected as she continued driving, I sighed before turning away from Wanda to watch the road. It didn't take long before we arrived at the coffee shop and I hopped out, opening the door for Wanda as we all trailed in and took a seat at a table. "So did you enjoy being on a mission?"

"I have to admit, kicking someones arse was fun. Finding out that a Nazi driven company are stalking you however, isn't" I joked as we all laughed,

"We'll find out what they're up too. I promise" Wanda assured as she placed a hand on mine, "But for now... You and Bucky hmm?"

"I was going to bring that up myself, from what you told me I thought you hated each other. Then you both go MIA for about 30 minutes and show up together" Nat raised her eyebrows at me as I let out a giggle.

"I did think he hated me at the charity event! He was a little rude, even when he found me outside he was slightly rude! Then during the mission and such but he found me when I went out for some air and we sort of talked things out. Re-introduced ourselves and I guess we're friends now" I explained. The breeze slightly blew through my hair as I zoned out and began to watch the people walking past. Aside from pretty views, people watching was also one of my favourite habits, it was fun to come up with backstories for them.

That couple there, it's their fourth date and he's in love already but she's been in the gir group chat talking about him and is now starting to have doubts. Sure he's the safest she's played it because he works as an accountant, makes a steady wage, has no kids and wants to devote all his time to her but she has a past and a reputation for going with bad boys. She's also recently met a leader of a bike gang and although none of her friends know because they'd disapprove she loves meeting him late at night at going for rides with him. Scratch that, I've just seen the ring on her finger.

"Arielle!" Wanda shouted, breaking me out of my trance and pointing up to the waitress stood at our table,

"Sorry, I'll get a vanilla iced coffee with a caramel drizzle" The waitress walked away as my eyes flicks between Nat and Wanda, "What're we discussing again?"

"You were people watching again weren't you? Nat laughs as I nod, "We're talking about about Wanda clearly having the hots for Vision. It's so obvious Wanda! You two are so good together."

"Wait, you two aren't together? I thought you were" Nat holds her hand out to me as if to prove her point to Wanda.

"It's just a slow thing you know. He was there for me when I went through everything with my brother, he's been my rock since day 1 and I don't want to risk anything. The guy can't even taste food, do we even know if he can fall in love?" she questioned, that is a fair point and due to my nature in break ups, I am all for team cautious. "What about you Arielle? What's your dating life like?" she asked as I watched Nat throw her a glare.

"It's OK Nat" I chuckled, "There's no dating life for me. I'm still kind of hung up on my ex a little, found out after 3 years he was cheating on me with my best friend. They've run off and now live somewhere and apparently have a kid so that's great. I don't fancy getting back into the dating life for some time. Going to take some time for me to trust any man" I explained,

"What a jackass! I'd have beat him if I were you!" she exclaimed as I chuckled, "Worse case there's always your date with Steve... OR you and Sam are pretty close" she wiggled her brows at me, as if implying something.

"You see I think Mr Red, White and Blue is too by the books for me. I'm a very specific person and I think I'd ruin him" I laughed, "He's just not really my type. As for Sam that's purely just friendship based. I'm like 90% sure he's gay with how he was at the charity gig. We just bonded over dry humour and blunt responses" I admitted as I looked at Nat. "Nat and Dr Banner however..."

"No. We're not getting into this" she stopped me.

"Oh come on Nat! You're not even going to splash a little of the tea?" I asked as she shook her head. "What if we play fuck, marry, kill?"

"What's fuck, marry, kill?" Wanda asked as drinks were placed in front of us all, I took no time in sipping my iced drink,

"It's an amazing game, you get three names and you have to decide which you have to fuck, purely a one night stand, never to have sex again, another to marry, no sex just marriage and another to kill off" I described as her lips twitched into a smile.

"That sounds brilliant! I want to play!" Nat rolled her eyes before finally agreeing, "OK so. Nat, how about Tony, Bruce and Steve?"

"Fuck Steve, marry Bruce and kill Tony" she said with no hesitation. "Wanda... Steve, Vision and Sam"

"Oooohhh... Fuck Sam, marry Vis and kill Steve" she admitted as she giggled, "This is a fun game! Arielle. Steve, Bucky and Sam?"

"Fuck Bucky, marry Sam and kill Steve..." I hummed as they both chuckled,

"Why fuck Bucky?" Nat questioned as I shrugged.

"I think it's the metal arm, something about that tells me he'd be good in bed"They both nodded in agreement. "What about Thor, Loki and Bucky?"

"Fuck Bucky, marry Thor and kill Loki" Wanda blurted out immediately

"Agreed" Nat and I said in unison. We all continued to chuckle between ourselves and drink for about an hour before heading back to the compound.

***

For the first time in a long time I looked around the room and felt like I belonged, like everyone wasn't judging me and like I had friends. The guys couldn't have been more welcoming to me, Nat and Wanda helped me unpack, Sam bought me some peanut butter to ensure we were always stocked, Tony gifted me some cozy blankets, Pepper stocked up on ice cream before whisking away to New York to sort something out for Stark Industries and Steve and Bucky had built a bookcase in my room after Nat told them I practically owned a library. We were all currently sat around the large dining table feasting on an amazing meal prepared by Vision.

"I want to make a toast" Tony announced as he stood up and held his glass up. "To the sassy bitch who saved our lives, we are eternally grateful" he smirked as I rolled my eyes and raised my glass to him.

"Should've left you strapped to the table" I chuckled as we all clinked our glasses and took a sip of whatever everyone was drinking. I had opted for some red wine since the meal we were eating contained beef. You have to match your wine to your meat, otherwise you're a sociopath, end of. Laughter filled the room as everyone ate their food and dived into their own conversations.

"So Arielle, if you're going to be staying with us for some time would you care to accompany me on a run tomorrow?" Sam asked as I finished the food in my mouth and took a sip of wine,

"Why Samuel, I would be most honoured. I am quite badly out of shape so you may have to sow down for me" I chuckled,

"Out of shape? Sure if you call a body like that out of shape. Tell you what I'll be in your shape and you can be mine" Wanda interrupted as I chuckled. "I'd kill to look like you."

"She's not wrong, my cousin has one of the hottest bods I've seen. Didn't you get voted most bangable in high school?" Nat asked as I almost spat my drink out,

"Yeah I can imagine that" Bucky chuckled,

"I did, I also got most likely to become an assassin. Think the school were onto all the ballet lessons I was taking" I joked as I continued to sip my wine.

"Would you like a refill m'lady?" Steve asked as he was topping up his glass,

"I'll take one if you promise to never call me that again" I laughed and passed him my glass which he filled and returned to me.

"What you're not into old fashioned niceness?" Sam giggled as I rolled my eyes and Nat scoffed, "What? Go on tell me what you're into"

"I don't have to explain shit to you, dickie bird" I teased, "I just have a name. I'm no damn damsel in distress calling out for a knight in shining armour to save me. I save myself" I informed him sassily as Bucky chuckled, "What're you laughing at metal man?"

"Don't know why you're telling us that. You saved their arses and knocked out over half the HYDRA soldiers on your own. If there's anything I've learnt about this time it's that the roles are reversed. Men stay at home and cook cherry pie and watch the kids while the women go out and do the arse kicking. Just remind me not to get on your bad side" I took a sip of his wine also as I smiled. He wasn't wrong, there were a lot of stay at home Dads now whilst the wives worked.

"All this because I called you m'lady. I am sorry Arielle" Steve chuckled. It didn't take long before we'd all finished our meal and it was now 9 o'clock, the table had been cleared, dishes had been done and slowly, one by one, everyone started peeling off to their own rooms. I made my way to my room, wanting to get some rest for tomorrow when I made a start on that file. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was expecting to relax but instead my body tensed up and I was unable to get comfortable. Finally giving up I decided I'd just go for a shower, I stripped my clothes and let the water get hot before hopping in, letting the pressure of the water relax my skin ever so slightly.

I quickly grabbed my shampoo and conditioner and began to lather each one in my hair before rinsing them off. I then began to massage my body wash into my shoulders, allowing my fingers to push the knots out, once I was all done I moved my way down to my leg where my hands ran over the scar that resided there.

"Fuck you!" I spat as Shostakov entered the room. I've been tied up for 3 days. 3 days and I had someone come in and feed me ONCE. I'd endured 3 sessions of electrotherapy and yet I refused to keep my mouth shut. Some would call me stupid, I call me stubborn. I wasn't about to let this old arse woman silence me when I was the perfect candidate for an assassin. I'd taken out Nat more than I could remember and had yet to be defeated by anyone else. These people wouldn't dream of killing me, they need me.

"Arielle, I see the therapy isn't doing anything for you and your mouth" she observed as I glared at her. "Due to this we will have to take your treatment up another way."

"You know what you old hag? Fucking do it. I ain't got nothing left to live for anymore. You won't silence me because I'm Arielle fucking Romanoff" I growled, "Just you wait until I get out of these restraints, first person on my target list is you" I shouted as she continued to stare at me blankly.

"Do it on her right thigh" she ushered a man into the room , the shadows covered his face but I could see he was holding a branding iron with the Red Room logo on it, it glowed a bright orange and my eyes flickered between her and the metal. "Once it's healed if she still wants to continue, I give you full permission to go over the same spot as many times as you'd like" she walked out of the room as the man came up to me. The light from the small window now illuminated his face, as he stepped forward.

"Get it over with" I sighed, before I had chance to take a breath the hot metal was stabbed into my thigh. I focused on not letting a noise come out of my mouth as I held back tears from my eyes.

I snapped back into reality as I rinsed myself off and wrapped a towel around my body. I grabbed a fresh hoodie and a pair of shorts along with some fluffy socks and ensure my body was completely dry before throwing them on. I then towel dried my hair and sat on my bed. it was now midnight and I'm pretty sure everyone is asleep. Without a second thought I grabbed a book and slipped out of the room and made my way downstairs to the kitchen. I rummaged through the cupboards and found some plain rice cakes labelled 'Nat do NOT touch' so naturally I grabbed them along with the jar of peanut butter Sam had got me, a spoon and made my way to the sofa, I placed my back against the arm of the couch and my seat on the cushion.

After opening the book, I spread some peanut butter on a rice cake, taking a bite before beginning to read it, I had just gotten to the part where Bruno and Shmuel were in Brunos house and he was cleaning glasses when my head shot up to be greeted with a familiar face at the door.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked as he walked over and took a seat by my feet, I shook my head at him. "Neither could I... What're you reading?" he asked as I held the book up to him and took another bite of my peanut butter smothered rice cake, "you know I lived through that."

"I know, old man... I have to admit it's one of my favourites to read. I can't even begin to imagine what it was like being there though" I told him as my eyes flickered up to him, his hand ran through his hair as he sighed.

"You don't want to know... Trust me" he admitted, "What's kept you up late at night this long doll?" he asked as his hand now rubbed the back of his neck.

"You don't want to know, trust me" I turned back to my book and glanced up to see him staring at me, curiosity filled his eyes as his head tilted ever so slightly. A silence fell among us as I turned back to my book.

"Tell me something no one else knows" I froze... What? "I mean, of course if you're comfortable doing that. I'll tell you something too" he added on, 

"You first" I placed my bookmark between the pages and placed the book on the table.

"It stays between us?" I nodded at him as I pulled the blanket over my legs. "When I was little, Steve and I were best friends. Steve usually had trouble with girls, but he really liked one in Primary school, her name was Holly Walker. I was trying to get him to build up the courage to ask her out to a school dance. The day before he was meant to ask her she came up to me and told me she wasn't going to the dance and asked me to go to the movies with her, I told Steve I was poorly and went to the movies with Holly instead" he admitted, I chuckled slightly "What? I feel bad about it, maybe if he'd have asked her he'd have had more confidence with girls! Anyway it's your go now." he said as I thought about an aspect of my life that I'd never told anyone and one that I could tell Bucky without giving up too much about my life.

"When I found out my ex-boyfriend was cheating on me with my best friend, a package turned up at each of their houses. I'd made a glitter bomb so that when the parcel was opened, glitter went everywhere. I don't know how much experience you've had with glitter given that you're an old man but it's impossible to clean up" I laughed thinking about the struggle they both probably had. "Granted, I imagine they both put two and two together and realised it was me that sent them but I never even told Nat that I did that" Bucky gave me a stern look.

"I'm sorry that happened to you but that doesn't count, it wasn't something about you. Plus, they know you did it so you have to tell another story" he pushed as I rolled my eyes, "Careful, you roll your eyes so much I think they may fall out of your skull" I bet you can't guess what that comment got him... Another eye roll.

"Well when I was little obviously I grew up like Nat and I-"

"What do you mean you grew up like Nat?" he asked as I tilted my head at him,

"Didn't Nat tell you? Or didn't you read like a file on me or something?" I questioned as he shook his head at me, "Oh erm... Well I was abandoned at the age of 2 and left on the doorstep of what was believed to be an orphanage/ballerina training site. The whole ballerina thing was to cover up the fact that these Russians were training up children to be assassins. They realised Nat and I had the same surname and dug into our pasts to find out that we were cousins" I explained as Bucky began to pull the other side of the blanket over his legs. "I was trained up to be an assassin but whilst undergoing training there was a girl, Karine, who thought she could talk down to everyone. She had been there training the longest and thought because of that she could bully and intimidate the other girls, one day she decided to push me over whilst I was in the line for lunch." I glanced over at Bucky to see him staring at me, listening in to everything I was saying.

"Did you beat her up there and then? You seem like you would've done" he laughed as I shook my head, "Really?"

"Really. I waited until nightfall, all the girls were tucked up in their beds and I snuck out. I have no idea how I didn't wake up the other girls in my room because I fell over my own feet. Anyway I managed to make my way to her room, she stayed alone because anyone she shared with ended up getting beat up mysteriously. I got into her room and cut her hair, stuck her hand in a bucket of water and the next day she woke up to find she'd wet the bed and also had a chunks of her hair missing. She ended up becoming a joke at the academy and actually got transferred because she was ridiculed by the other girls but no one ever found out who the hair cutter was. Even Nat doesn't know about that" I smiled, remembering the girls who Katrine bullied who came out of their shell after she had left. They felt safer in the academy once she had gone.

"How old were you both?" Bucky asked as I scoffed slightly,

"I was 11. She was 19." Buckys eyes widened and he held his hands up in the air,

"I'm glad we sorted things out Arielle. I'd hate to forever be on the bad side of you" he surrendered as I smiled at him, "Can I ask why you didn't end up being an assassin?" My body froze in fear. That is something I'm not ready to tell anyone just yet. "Hey, it's OK. You don't have to tell me" he soothed as I sent him a timid smile, sure Bucky had trusted me with a secret from Steve but I wasn't ready to open up to anyone about what kind of 'therapy' I'd been through. 

"Thanks for not pushing it" I muttered as he sent a nod my way and turned the TV on, he was flicking through Netflix at various different films and I watched him closely. Yes the man was attractive there is no doubt about that. The TV was only illuminating his strong jaw and this piercing blue eyes but there was something else there, something I couldn't put my finger on. 

What secrets are you hiding Bucky Barnes?

"You want to watch this with me?" he asked as I looked at the TV screen, he'd selected Pearl Harbour and I smiled at him.

"It's one of my favourites" we said in unison before giving each other a strange look before chuckling together. "Didn't peg you for a history type of girl" Bucky smirked,

"I didn't peg you for a romance type guy."

"Touche" he chuckled, "It's just a bit relatable you know. Going off to war and such, pretty dame waiting for you to come home... Only difference is I didn't- didn't" Bucky voice caught in his throat as I moved over to him,

"Hey" I shushed as I pulled his head into my chest and hugged up, rocking back and forth slightly, "You're here now Buck. That's all that matters. You served our country with courage. If it wasn't for you I'd be speaking German right now" I soothed as he remained in my arms. 

"I didn't do anything more than the other guys, it was Steve who saved us all" he argued as i shook my head, oh right... he can't see me.

"You did just as much as Steve. I've read the history books. You served just as well as Steve did and you didn't have super soldier serum in you" I joked as his head lightly bobbed in my chest from a small chuckle. "Besides, you gave the great Captain America the kick up the butt he needed to start fighting. I think that was your plan all along Bucky Barnes."

"You really know how to make me feel better" he pulled away from my chest and faced me, a small tear falling down his face. I lifted my hand up and place it on his cheek, using my thumb to wipe away the tear. As I was about to pull my hand away he placed his over mine and leant his cheek into it, "I knew you weren't always sarcastic and sassy. You do have a soft side darling" his blue eyes never left my boring green ones as I smiled,

"Now now don't you be telling everyone I can be nice. Got to keep up the facade, someone has to keep Tony in line" I chuckled as I dropped my hand from his face into my lap. "You will find it you know. A 'dame' as you put it, to come home too. She's out there somewhere" I reminded him as he smiled at me, flashing his pearly whites.

"I'm too broken for that I'm afraid, I accepted I wouldn't find it when I stopped being the Winter Soldier. That's all people see me as, some horrible person who has hurt others." his head fell down and he looked at his own hands in his lap.

"If it helps, I'll always see you as Bucky Barnes, the rude man who didn't give me a second glance" I chuckled as he looked up at me,

"That's because I was too busy with the first glance" he smirked as I turned my body around so my back was against the sofa and leaned into him slightly.

"Come on, press play. I'm ready to drool over Ben Affleck now" I chuckled as he started the movie, "You comfy?" I asked as I glanced up at him. He slouched into the side of the couch and draped his arm over me, pulling me up slightly so my head was resting on his chest.

"I am now" he smiled as I watched the child version of Rafe and Danny playing in a pretend plane, I smiled at the two kids,

"That's what I imagine you and Steve were like. Two little boys, messing around. Living a normal life" I chuckled, eyes never leaving the screen.

"I mean we never played with an aeroplane but yeah this pretty much sums us up. Although he's definitely Rafe, he did horribly in English and he was the one most determined to get into the Army. Granted I went in too but he just didn't stop trying" Bucky chuckled, "I didn't believe him when he found me at the fair and told me he'd been accepted. He was always such a small kid, if he'd have met you back then your words would've snapped him in two. What would you reckon you'd have done... if you'd have met us back then?" he asked.

"Well I wouldn't have been able to fight, I'd have probably fixed the planes or been a nurse. I wouldn't have been able to be a sit a home woman and do nothing" I informed him,

"I reckon I'd have swept you off your feet if I knew you in the 40's, as long as you had a friend for Steve" he laughed as I rolled my eyes though he couldn't see me due to us both having our eyes fixated on the TV,

"You saying you'd have broken my heart Bucky Barnes?" I laughed as I looked up at him to find he was already looking down at me,

"I'm saying I'd have had a reason to stay alive and come back after the war" he admitted as I sent him a soft smile, "Though I think you'd have intimidated me back then. You're a very outspoken lady and I don't think I've ever met anyone who talks back as much as you."

"It's a gift, got to keep people on their toes you know. Life's boring if you know what's waiting around the corner for you. Sometimes you've just got to take some risks, life's a gift and but it sure as hell doesn't come gift wrapped, the way I see it... You've got to get up off your behind and make it worth living."

"Who died and made you Queen of motivational speaking?" Bucky chuckled and I nudged his side with my hand, resulting in a small squirm from him.

"Is the mighty White Wolf... ticklish?" I smirked as he threw me a look, "Don't worry. I'm not going to tickle you. Just nice to know if we ever have to fight that all I have to do is wiggle my fingers my your ribs and you'll drop to the ground." I laughed as I rested my head back down on Bucky's chest. "Now watch the film" my eyes went back to the screen and watched as it was showing Rafe discussing going to England to fight in the war, my eyes began to get heavier and heavier and soon enough darkness consumed me.