1-20-16 fifty nine days clean

Look at how far you've come.

Last year,

You were shaky as fuck to sing in front of people. To even exist in front of people. You didn't know reality until it begged to be noticed.

You didn't quite know who you were, hell, you were hardly even a lyricist at all. You just had a passion.

You hated your body but did nothing to change it.

You were happy all the time in a superficial kind of way.

You didn't understand things, or how broken your household has always been.

You didn't know the definition of love.

You didn't write poetry.

Your lyrics lacked depth or truth or connection.

Now.

You're getting closer to the stage, a confidence you've acquired aiding that.

You got the hell over anorexia, anxiety, self harm, and sort of depression (it doesn't really go away).

Your lyrics and poetry affect people. You did it. You're doing it.

You fell in love. Had your heart shattered so fucking painfully. But you recovered. (Fucking go you! That was so hard!)

You fell head over heels in love with a creative side of you who is open minded, loves the summer and writes as an addiction.

You also love bands and artists in a much healthier way than your old Kesha fetish. (I won't explain that)

You've grown up about 5 years in the matter of one year.

You're realistic but you find a solace in it. You recognize reality but you spend time inside of your head so you can escape (ALSO BIG FUCKING PROPS TO YOU FOR MAKING YOUR MIND A PLACE YOU LOVE, YOU'RE NOT AFRAID OF IT ANYMORE. FEAR IS A CONTAGIOUS POISON. YOU ACCEPT YOUR DARKER PARTS AND YOU'RE JUST REALLY MENTALLY HEALTHY ALL THE WAY AROUND (you're still insane but in a way you can accept and handle)) this life's bullshit.

You are no longer oblivious to your broken household.

You've seen, second hand lived through, and experienced so much.
You have done so much.

Look at you! Way to fucking go.

You've got a journey ahead..

Let's do that over again.

- (m.m)

I wish I could fit soo much more here but this is just a few accomplishments I realized I've made in this past year (i memorize life and memories in general so I can pretty much remember where I was at this time last year. It plays like a movie in my head). This last year has been such a good fucking year but I know in a year's time, this'll be even better.

Thanks for sitting in the passenger seat of some of my best moments this year. I love and appreciate you all so much.

Also, this isn't me bragging. I'm giving myself a little bit grace.