6-29-16
This day makes me a little sick,
Just get it over with.
Lately sleep deprivation has seemed
More desirable
Than a healthy sleeping schedule.
And even when my head's hazy,
I love you.

I listen to tracks that take me home,
Even if the music keeps stopping
And my bones keep breaking.
This is gonna save me,
I don't care how I come outta this,
If i make it out alive,
That's good enough.

Close my eyes and take a breath,
This day isn't over.
This week isn't over.
I ache for something of deeper texture.
I ache for a place I love,
A place I call home.

Time confuses me,
24 hours can feel like they'll never end,
24 hours can feel like they've sped by
And if you blink too fast,
It'll feel like a dream.
Although, I'm obsessed with time,
and terrified of it not existing in the ways it exists,
I want it over.

I'm staring down at these hands
and all of the red ink I've spilled
About you
These last few days.
You're worse than the nicotine
I wish I had right now.

This town isn't prettier even when it's 5am.

I'm starting to lose myself a little and depression is back.
Everything is fucked up right now.
I can't lose myself.
And this poem is shit
I just figured if I updated it'd connect me again
It's not even a likeable disconnection
I just fuck
- (m.m)