SEOL JAEUN
-pov

With every passing minute, it's almost as if the voices were eating me, bit by bit. And when the sun goes down and the moon watches over the city, that's when the voices eat me whole, keeping me awake. It's always terrifying to go to sleep, because you're afraid of not waking up.

You're afraid of giving in to the voices the moment your eyes shut and you fall into a deep sleep.

"Hoseok-ah, have you fed the fish yet?" I ask the older one who was seated in the living room, texting his girlfriend away with a huge grin spread across his lips.

He hasn't fed the fish yet, because that's your job to do, are you that useless? I sigh, placing my things onto the counter before walking over towards the fish tank to feed the fish. Opening the container, I open the top of the tank, feeding the fish.

Looking over my shoulder, I watch Hoseok get up from the couch and head towards the coat rack to grab his bomber jacket. He glances up from his phone and mumbles, "I'm going out with Eunhee, I'll see you later tonight, alright? Get some sleep, and I left some food in the kitchen."

"Alright, thanks, Hoseok-ah." I smile softly, and when he's finally out the door. I head towards the living room to turn on the TV. This was something that helped me drown out the voices whenever I was home alone.

I don't quite remember the last time I was happy. However, it was funny how I vividly remember the first time I was hit with negative emotions. It all started the day I was fresh out of high school, going into my first year of university. Who knew that four high school years of being bullied would result in my degrading personality? It obviously wasn't me.

It all started when I entered into university. I was the only one who had been accepted to such a prestigious university in the country. With all the pressure of being all alone in classes, being distant from high school friends because they were just as busy as you were, it was the first time I witnessed loneliness. It was also the first time I witnessed a good old friend named depression, creeping up on my back as if it was ready to stab me.

But it all triggered when my parents passed away. I was still getting the hang of my first year, studying hard every day and every night. But all it took was one phone call from the hospital, and the voice of a doctor telling me to rush to the hospital as soon as I could before my parents breathed their last breath.

A car accident. It was a hit-and-run. Sometimes I wonder how the person who had hit them was living a great life, knowing that they weren't caught for killing two people. But at the same time, I wonder if they'd feel even better knowing that they killed one more person as well.

My phone vibrated, snapping me out of my trance. I glance down at my phone to see Kim Taehyung calling. I sigh, trying to muster up a happy mood before answering the call.

"Hello?"

"Jaeun-ssi, Yoojung was wondering if you could help her with her homework?" He asks. "I've been trying to help her but she just doesn't seem to understand what's going on."

"I mean, I can come over, if you don't mind." I explain, "sometimes it's quite hard for students her age to grasp concepts to do take-home assignments. I think it's easier to come over there myself and help her―"

"Great!" He cuts me off. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion when I hear Yoojung letting out shouts of joy on the other line. "I'll see you then."

I purse my lips into a line, shrugging off my thoughts before grabbing my things and heading out the door.

• • •

KIM TAEHYUNG
―pov

"Yoojung-ah, are you really sure that you don't know what to do with your homework?"

Yoojung looks up at me innocently and nods her head while batting her eyelashes. I pout at her, heading towards the bathroom to check on my appearance. While fixing my hair and my clothes, I walk out of the room to see her staring at the door as if she was anticipating Jaeun's visit.

"You told me you could write sentences and you knew your hobbies, I don't think this should be that hard of an assignment, Yoojungie." I smile down at her before ruffling her hair.

"I just need help, appa." She mumbles, "and you're not helping me at all."

Suddenly, there's a knock at the door and Yoojung's already jumping onto her feet. She's already at the door before I could even catch up to her, and she looks over her shoulder to wait for me to check who's at the door. Looking through the peephole, I see Jaeun rubbing at her arms with an anxious gaze on her face. Slowly opening the door, Jaeun slightly jumps, almost startled.

And somehow I felt like I was getting dizzy. She wasn't wearing her usual school attire. In fact, she was wearing a pair of black jeans and a pastel pink shirt, topping it all off with a grey coat. I smile softly at her, waving at her. She lashes a small smile before stepping into the apartment.

"Ms. Seol! Can you help me with my homework? Appa doesn't know what he's doing."

"Ah, really?" She mumbles softly and I could only stare at her sheepishly. "Don't worry, I'll help you out."

"Are you sure we're not keeping you from anything special? It seems like you're going out on a date." I laugh nervously and Jaeun raises an eyebrow, almost as if she was surprised.

"N-No," she stutters.

"Aish, Ms. Seol, if you have a boyfriend, I have to approve of him first!" Yoojung exclaims. "But if you're going to date appa―"

"Kim Yoojung," I clear my throat, "just finish your homework with Ms. Seol, okay? It's getting late, and you don't want her to get tired, do you?"

"No," Yoojung mumbles. "Sorry."

I sigh softly, avoiding Jaeun's gaze before muttering, "kids these days."

• • •

"Taehyung-ah."

I look over my shoulder, prying my eyes away from my computer screen to see Jaeun standing at the doorway. She's holding Yoojung's notebooks and pencils in her arms, looking hesitantly at me. I raise an eyebrow questioningly.

"Yoojung fell asleep," she mumbles, "she's finished her homework, though. I thought I'd just hand these to you so that you could put her to bed."

"T-Thanks," I stutter, heading towards her and grabbing Yoojung's things from her. Our hands slightly brush against each other and I flinch instantly, moving away from her. She mirrors my actions, leaning farther against the doorframe. "I'll drive you home, it's getting late."

"Oh, no, you don't need to. I can call Hoseok to pick me up―"

"It's getting late. I'm sure Hoseok's at home already asleep. I can drive you home, it's no big deal." I reassure her.

While looking at her, I notice how she'd gone quiet. Her facial expression was hard to read. However, she looked as if though she was exhausted. Her eyes were wandering back and forth, until she had shut them. My eyes trail down to her hands that were balled up into fists, and her knuckles were turning white.

"Jaeun, are you alright?" Her eyes open at my voice, and she slowly nods her head, mustering up a small smile. "I'll just get my things and we can head out, alright?"

"But what about Yoojung?" She whispers in a raspy voice.

"I'll bring her, even when she's asleep, she barely wakes up." I chuckle, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion when I notice she doesn't laugh along.

"I'll see you downstairs," she whispers before exiting the room and heading downstairs.

• • •

SEOL JAEUN
-pov

I rub at my arms, looking out the window to keep myself distracted. I feel my shoulders getting tense, and my breathing becoming heavier and heavier. It's almost as if I've been running for miles without end; as if I've been running a marathon.

While I'm trying to steady the pace of my breathing, I try to drown out the voices in my head. Right, I haven't taken my medication yet, which was probably why the voices have been so harsh.

He pities you enough that he had to insist on driving you home. Do you not know any better? I shut my eyes again, biting my lip to stop myself from crying or from bursting out into anger.

You even forgot to take your pills. I guess you hate yourself that much to forget about your own well-being. You should just die―

I open my eyes again, feeling a warm hand grab mine. I feel my shoulders relax at the touch, and I glance at Taehyung, who's looking at me with concern. It was only then that I've realized that we're already parked in the driveway. I sigh to myself.

"Are you okay? I've been talking to you for the past five minutes and it's like you've drowned me out." He asks with concern, "are you sick? Are you not feeling well?"

He reaches out to my forehead with his hand and I flinch at his touch, moving his hand away gently. He furrows his eyebrows and I look at him with an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, I'm just really tired." I mumble softly. "Thank you for the ride, Taehyung. I'll see you and Yoojung tomorrow."

He watches me as I hop out of the car and scurry towards the door, fiddling with the keys. I enter into the house and slam the door shut. Leaning against the door, I feel myself slide down and fall onto the floor, butt-first. Reaching back into my pocket, I try to search for the bottle filled with my pills until―

"So, when were you planning on telling me?"

I slowly look up to see Hoseok standing a few footsteps ahead of me. My eyes linger down towards his left hand that held the bottle. He looks broken, and his eyes were bloodshot red, as if he had been crying. I purse my lips into a line, instantly standing up onto my feed to grab the bottle away from him.

"Give it back," I whisper.

"So, all this time, you kept it a secret?" He whispers. "Jaeun-ah, you're not only my roommate but my best friend. How could you keep this a secret?"

"I didn't want to burden you." I look away from him, feeling my eyes start to water. "I don't want you worrying about me. I don't want anyone worrying about me―"

He pulls me into a tight embrace, snuggling into my neck. He's already crying and his tears are soaking up my shirt. I stand there, completely frozen and numb.

"Jaeun-ah," he mumbles, "I don't know what to do without you. Please, whatever it is that you feel, tell me. If you feel terrible, tell me. I hate knowing that my best friend is going through a rough time and won't tell me because she's afraid I'll worry."

I slowly wrap my arms around his waist. "I promise I'll tell you."

"I can't lose you, Jaeun. I can't let depression eat you alive. I'm not going to let that happen. I'm not going to let it take you away from me."

I sigh, relaxing to his embrace. It was nice, it was nice knowing that the voices died down the moment Hoseok found out. It was as if his love had made me forget about the voices, made me drown them out, even if it was only temporarily.

• • •

THE DOWNFALL: PAST
―where it ruined her

"Are you fucking kidding me? Taehyung as in, my Taehyung?"

Jimin nods his head with a slight frown on his face. Yoongi bursts out into laughter, shaking his head in dismay. He glances at Jaeun, who's too busy studying at her desk. Yoongi rolls his eyes, looking towards Taehyung, who's too busy looking at his phone for text messages.

"Yoongi-ah, you can't do this to her. Doing this and being mean to her won't make her like you, you know that right?"

"Who said I had to follow the rules?" He mutters. "I don't like her like that. Besides, she doesn't like me like that. She likes Taehyung―"

"Then why do you like ruining her life so much?" Jimin cuts him off.

"It doesn't matter," he replies. "I just can't believe that she likes Taehyung. He's literally a fool in the body of a god."

Jimin watches as Yoongi stares at them, one by one, and when a mischievous smirk slowly appears on his face, Jimin begins to panic.

"Yah, Yoongi-ah, whatever you're thinking, stop it. Now."

"I'm just going to toy with her a little bit, I hope you don't mind."

"I do mind―"

"Well, too late." Yoongi smirks. "I've already made up my mind.