This is a joke btw. None of this is serious so please don't take offense.

1) If you don't show your opinions, people will hate you anyways, so you might as well do it

2) Don't wait for anything or an immigrant will take it from you

3) Cheating on your wife is okay as long as Washington's on your side

4) It's okay to forget your friends once you have power

5) Writing love letters to your wife's sister is completely acceptable

6) Admitting to the world that you cheated on your wife is a bad idea

7) Cheating on your wife will eventually lead to you dying in a duel

8) Cheating on your wife > Embezzling government funds

9) Don't like someone? Well just find out their beliefs, and disagree with every single one of them

10) Don't encourage your son to duel

11) Don't tell your son to shoot in the air when dueling

12) Don't have a child who looks like your friend that died during the Revolutionary War or he'll probably die too

13) Don't let Lafayette leave America or else Jefferson will come back

14) Don't outwrite James Madison or he will hate you forever

15) Maybe don't take a job if your wife really doesn't want you too

16) Don't marry someone cause their daddy's got money

17) If you marry a British soldier's wife, she will die

18) Don't throw away your shot, UNLESS it's an actual gun shot. Then you can throw it away.

19) If your son died shooting at the sky during a duel, then you will probably die doing the same thing

20) USE YOUR WORDS