I'm attempting to convey this through text for the third time

So, today, my friend Lindsey came over after school, and we were hanging out in my room, just chilling, and she looks at me suddenly and goes, "What are you thinking about?"

I glance at her for a second, "I'm not really thinking. I'm watching a video."

She kind of just purses her lips a little bit and sits back, "Are you happy?"

I'm a little taken back, "Uh, not necessarily, I guess."

"How happy would you say you are? Like, if you had to put a percent on how happy you usually are, what's that number?"

I weigh the emotions of my day-to-day life, "20-30%" I can already tell by the look on her face that I made a mistake by saying that

"And the rest of the time, you're sad?"

"Well, sad sometimes, usually anxious or stressed. Worrying." I make to leave out hopeless. I can tell at this point I've already screwed up the conversation

"But... You still act like nothing's wrong. Why do you act like everything's okay when you feel like that the majority of the time?"

"Because it doesn't matter." I say it before I even realize that that's not helping. "I still have to do what's giving me those feelings. It's not a choice. I've committed too much of my time to everything to quit now."

"Does anything make you happy?"

"Of course."

"What?"

It actually scared me how long it took me to start naming stuff. It was mostly college stuff, I left out anything to do with romantic endeavors and such (that's another conversation for another time. I don't feel like cracking through that issue yet), and I mention Christmas.

"So... Things that make you happy are things that haven't happened yet?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I look forward to a lot of things, and it keeps me going. Like going to Canada. I can't wait."

"Do you think about it everyday?"

I nod.

"But what happens when all that stuff is done?"

I pause, "Well... I try not to think about it honestly."

Somehow I managed to get the conversation off topic, but about a half hour later, she told me that she was really concerned that I have clinical depression. She said she had noticed how detached and sad I always seemed and she was getting really concerned about it. She said she thinks I should tell my parents and go to a therapist and take medicine for it.

I just- part of me can't even believe this all came out of her mouth. Lindsey is a very laid back individual. It's not like her to notice little stuff. Even when I'm not active due to my anxiety on Wattpad, I still try to function in my responsibilities without seeming too off about everything. Apparently I wasn't doing a very good job.

That's it, that's all I can write without deleting it.