I disappeared yesterday and I'm not really back yet I'm just popping in to inform you that my friend Ashley just compared me to Hitler

Me: You need to try gołąbki or I will never speak to you

Ash: Okay I will eat them to appease you.

. . .

I need to appease you like Hitler.

Me: wut no

Also my friend snapchatted me "happy 9/11" and I was kinda like,

".... Yeah that is not how that works Linds. That is just- no. That's the opposite of how that's supposed to go."