#Warning:
-violence
-mentions bullying
-mature content

Seokjin’s P.O.V.

“Take the little girl”

“Nooo!!” I shuffle back, my child secure in my arms as I try to escape the fate I have been pulled into yet again “stay back…she’s only a baby!! Please…!!” 

“We don’t want to hurt you Seokjin…but it’s only as long as you cooperate…”

I’ve nowhere to go as my back hits the clammy wall of the cell and I frantically try to guard Soo from being taken away from me.

Taehyung, where are you? I need you…we need you…please…

“Stay away!! No! Noo….!!” They try to pull her out of my arms and almost in reflex I drive my fist into his throat, clutching Soo to my chest “I said don’t touch her.”

I watch the man sputter and choke, his hands grasping at his own neck as he tries to even out his breathing because he is lucky the hit was not too harsh to break his windpipe. I see three more of them step into the room, one of them aiming a taser at me now.

“I will try this calmly one more time…give us the girl or we are talking 50,000 volts for both of you…n I doubt she’s going to survive it”

I gulp denying to let go but fear effectively fills my insides.

“So, what’s it going to be?”

Tears fill my eyes as I realize how powerless I am right now and my weakness only makes me more angry…how do I just let them take my baby?! How do I do that?!! I can’t!!

“What did you do? Where is Taehyung? What the fuck do you people want huh?! She’s a baby…let her go…I’ll stay…do whatever you want…just don’t hurt her please…” my voice grows weaker, and turns from angry complaints to a mere plea…

“Well, that’s the order by the way…we are not supposed to hurt her” one of them speaks walking closer “and about your man…well…” he puts his phone on the table set in the middle of the room and radio sounds come on, a police scanner reports about an accident…two cars had toppled into the river and had flowed downstream…the vehicle from the facility had been recovered and the drivers’ body was found still strapped in his seat, his throat had been slit and they suspect that Byun had escaped…but the patrol car which had toppled along however had sunk and could not be recovered, and neither of the bodies of the two cops had been found.

I blink confused…my mind can’t process what I had just heard and my eyes move to the men smirking at me before my insides go cold…I wasn’t informed of anything, it’s a classified mission and according to protocols they aren’t supposed to divulge any information about a mission to anyone…not even to family…

“Unfortunately, it seems like he and his buddy didn’t make it.”

My knees buckle and I forget how to breathe “wh-what?”

My voice is a whisper as I feel the void within getting replaced with a wave of something unnameable…I don’t know what to feel…

“Did you really think Axel could be destroyed because of the greed for revenge of one man?”

This can’t be…this isn’t how it’s supposed to be…he…no…Taehyung…don’t do this to me…no, please…I can’t breathe…please…

I feel Soohee’s shrill cry pierce through my senses as I realize they are trying to pull her away from me.

“No! That’s what you wanted right?! You wanted him gone…what do you want from my child now?! Let go!!” I struggle but in vain, my arms wrapped protectively around her and they surround me, grasping at my arms and using force now. But the more I struggle, the harsher their actions get.

“I warned you” he threatens grasping at a fistful of my hair.

They place a cloth over my mouth and nose while yelling angrily at me for being stubborn. It takes seconds for me to realize I had lost the fight and weakly watch through hazy eyes as they take my child from my arms before my strength fails and vision dwindles towards an alluring black.

Tae…please…where are you…I need you Tae…you can’t just leave like this…this isn’t how it’s supposed to be…you’re not gone, I know it…I need you…I need you so much…

-

“Jin…Jin…wake up, it’s okay…”

My eyes fly open and I instinctively grasp at him, the need to hold onto him and ensure that he was right here with me driving me mad, my heart calming down only after I am assured that it was just another bad memory that I need not fear anymore.

“Everything’s fine…we are safe-” “Soo…?” My voice is raspy and it feels as if I need to use too much strength only to utter a word.

“She’s playing in the living room, you want me to bring her here?” 

I hide into his chest, the warmth of his arms around me the greatest assurance I could ever need.

“No…it’s okay now” I inhale deeply, feeling my panic flushing out slowly. He sits by me, holding me to himself wordlessly as he lets me settle into the situation.

I almost lost everything…I thought I lost him…I thought I was never going to be able to hold Soo again…I almost died…

“I made breakfast…eat some please” he kisses my head, voice still the same heavy with worry since I woke up. I nod and he instantly gets busy to help me sit up, grabbing at the pillows to set those at my back to make it easier for me to lean against them.

“Comfortable enough?” He inquires checking at me before he turns to go and get the food and I clutch at his arm, keeping him there as I stare up at him to see the same pale hard face I had been seeing for the last couple days.

“I knew you’d get me out of there…no matter what”

My words make him turn to look at me before he quietly comes back to me and I coil my arms around him again, my heart greedy to get the most of this second chance at life I have been given to cherish what I am lucky to have. I feel him caressing the back of my head as I press a side of my face to his belly.

“I knew you wouldn’t let them hurt Soo” my words are a mumble against him “I knew you wouldn’t let Byun win.”

He stays quiet, hand stopping at my nape as he leans to set his chin at the top of my head. I wait for him to speak, I can feel there’s something eating him up and I am all too accustomed to his ways to know when he’s struggling with himself. Faint noises of Soo giggling and talking to her toys reach my ears, the house silent except for her endearing sounds.

“You were right” his voice is low and heavy mingled with deep regret “I should not have agreed to join the infiltrations…I should have given up my badge right after I returned from the prison.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore, we-” “No, it does…it does matter a lot to me…that was a stupid decision…I should’ve anticipated this…I should’ve-”

I pull him to sit beside me again as I clutch at both his arms and look at him straight in the eye.

“We survived” I utter the most important words “you killed him…just as he deserved.”

His breathing is rushed and his body is tensed as he blankly stares back at me and I know how this has been the only thing on his mind for years, he had wanted Axel to lose but his sole intention was to kill the man who had taken away everything from him once…the promise he had made to avenge the deaths of all those people finally fulfilled, the fight his mother had began finally won and yet it seems as if now he isn’t sure about what he should be doing next...as if he’s still not sure if he should accept that the war against Axel has finally ended.

“Tae” my hand inadvertently goes to set on his cheek “you are free now.”

He blinks at me, eyes unsure still “I told Namjoon”

“It’s your decision” I assure again, my thumb caressing the bruise on his cheekbone “I told you already I am okay with whatever you decide, I have fond memories of this town…I remember everything being so beautiful when we were here the last time” I smile at him as I try to help him break out of this apprehension he has been suffering from “I remember you asking me if I’d kiss your pain away…I will try…I always will”

He pulled me to himself, arm coiling about my shoulder to set at the back of my head again as he kissed my face, soft pecks trailing over my temple, my cheek and my jaw.

“For a moment I thought it would have been easier to kill myself than helplessly stand there to watch you fighting death” he spoke against my neck, nose tracing along my throat “I probably would do it without a thought if anything happened to you”.

“How could you even think of being so selfish Tae…what about Soo? How’d she grow up without both of us? You’d be okay with leaving your daughter an orphan?” I frown at him as I pull back, my gaze and words accusing because of how hurt I felt to hear him say that.

“That’s the reason I didn’t go back to them…” his eyes dropped low and yet my frown stayed as I try to understand him “I knew if I did, they’d take it on themselves to care for her and it’d easy to think that she was fine with them…she could do without me…I haven’t been much of a parent to her anyway…”

My heart caved with hurt and mind went blank to hear him…I have heard people call him so many names…terrorist…assassin…murderer….and I have seen them hate him for so many things…yet none sees that he hates himself more than they ever could.

It is at times like these that I can see how broken he is…how his young zeal for revenge had ended up ruining his soul to the very core…so much that he feels lost now that it has all come to an end and seems to believe that he’d solely live for the sake of Soo and me.

“You saved millions of lives Tae…including mine…” he picks his head up, eyes pained but a sad smile played on his lips as he leaned nearer and brushed his fingers through my unkempt fringes before tucking a strand behind my ear.

“I’d do anything to keep you safe” the words ring with sincerity and I feel his hand lightly graze down my side to set on the side of my belly where the bullet wound was still healing “it’s going to leave a scar.”

My eyes follow his hand “well, they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

He smiles at my reply “very brave words…but I’ll just pray you never face anything like that again, it taught me why you felt helpless and guilty when I got shot the last time…”

A chuckle spilled out of my mouth on its own as I realize he must have thought of all sorts of things while I was passed out for days “you looked terrified when I woke up…”

“That was me trying not to breakdown before a room full of people, I was literally holding onto my last string of hope” he confesses without hesitation.

“Even the doctors looked terrified when I woke up…Soo was the only one who looked delighted.”

“She has asked me the same question a million times” Tae shakes his head to himself “still sleeping?-still sleeping?-still sleeping?”

I wanted to laugh but it hurt everywhere “I can’t imagine what it must have done to her to witness everything she did…I really hope she wouldn’t have any memory of all that, it’s the reason I think it’s a good decision to stay here”

Tae nods and we let the silence bring in the sense of peace and contentment in our new home. Well, technically not that new for Tae because he used to live here before he had been kidnapped from this very place by Axel the last time I was here.

It was a decision we had taken after I woke up, we had nothing to pack and just decided to start completely afresh as we shifted to live in the same little mountain town I had travelled to come meet Hobi and Yoongi while I was still in college.

Weird, how it feels like ages ago but was actually only a few years earlier…when we were still drinking and having karaoke nights and getting excited over a kiss…look at us now.

“Let’s pretend like this is the beginning, can we?” I smile leaning to put my forehead against his “pretend that it wasn’t only fear and pain that drove us to cling onto each other…hope that we can still live our best days together.”

“We can…” I feel him thumbing away the lines of tears that I didn't realise had trickled down “we will-” “Tae?”

“Hmm” he helps me lean against the pillows so that I don’t put too much strain on my wounds.

“After I’m all healed, I’d like to go on with the plan we made” I gulp down the sniffles as I refer to the things we had talked about on our date, the evening he proposed…things like getting married…and having a life like normal couples.

“I’d like that too” and the smile that breaks out on his face is bright and genuine “I want Soo to grow up like a kid of her age should…and I really want to be a good father to her, I want to give her everything I wished to have but never could…” his voice dwindled to a stop and I could sense the way he debated speaking the next words “I know, I am not like my father and I deny to believe that he had any power over the way I grew up or the way I took certain decisions that shaped me to become who I am today…but I can’t deny the fact that I have done some terrible things which I am not proud of and more importantly, I don’t want you to regret loving me the way I saw my mother regretting my father…”

I let my fingers entwine with his and give them a light squeeze “you’re right, you’re nothing like your father Tae…he was a psychopath…whatever you did is in the past now, and please believe me when I say that you saved a lot of lives Tae, and I am proud of you for that…that decisions you took were difficult, the road you chose was harsh and you did what you had to get the justice you believed you deserved…and you paid for it too. You lost people who were dear to you…you lost a chance to live a normal life for years and I know no matter how hard I try I will never be able to take away from you the burden of living with the memory of the traumatic events that you had to face…but I want to try…I want to try to love you enough, so that you can choose to love the life we can make for ourselves…I will never regret you Tae, you know that…”

I felt something bubbling within me, I need him to believe this too…I need him to know that he is so much more than just the guy who sought for his revenge.

“I can never regret you Tae…you know why you’re nothing like your father” he stared at me frozen still, his gaze fearful as he listened to me “they are all commending you today for defeating Axel, you might not see it or even care because of how the higherups or the media or the people had accused you earlier but you’re a hero to many today…and they might be only seeing your success but I know the hardships you had to survive to get here today…yours is the story of becoming the hero the hard way…and that’s why you’re my superstar…”

I smile back to see him smiling at me, our eyes brimming with moisture as he gently leans close and presses his mouth on mine.

And no matter how many years pass, it’s always so easy to feel how much my words affect him…or how much I affect him as I sense his overwhelming emotions in the way his mouth caresses mine, hands stiffly set on the mattress on either side of me as he stays alert not to press against me or hurt me in anyway. His lips move softly, moulding against mine as they curve together to fit perfectly and I forget the discomfort and pain that had been constant since I woke up.

“Appa…ap-ppa…?” Soo’s voice makes us break away as I watch her waddling into the room, her little palms cupping a big ball of snow as she shows it to me “cold!”

My first instinct is to walk over to her but Tae beats me to it, setting a hand on my shoulder to gesture me to stay in bed as he turns to her.

“You opened the window again, didn’t you?” Taehyung grumbled at her as he walked towards her and I watched Soo instantly dump the snow on the floor as she hastily rubbed her hands on her sweater, staring up at him with large innocent eyes “I told you not to…you’re gonna catch a cold…”

“No cold…” she showed him her hands as he picked her up and I couldn’t stop the giggle that slipped out.  

“I kept telling her she’ll catch a cold and now she thinks snow is called cold” Tae chuckles explaining before he sets her down on the bed and Soo instantly comes to me.

“It’s called snow…sn-o-w” I correct her as she coils her arms around my neck and presses her face to mine, her dark locks tickling my neck and her warm cosy smell fills my heart.

“So-no” she distractedly repeats the words, trying to completely ignore Tae as he tries to ensure she doesn’t do anything rash or accidentally hurt me.

He brings me breakfast and I watch him struggling to keep her in place as I eat, often smiling to see their interactions. Soo has this weird way of annoying the shit out of Tae, not staying still even for a moment while he keeps telling her to sit and not jump around as she repeats the new word she learned on a loop. He grabs at her to make her stay and it completely frustrates her as she yells at him.

“Sit down” his voice is a warning and Soo in turn heightens her jumping around, slipping out of his grasp and Tae crawls after her to grab at her to keep her in place and tries with a softer tone this time “sit down…that’s all I’m asking…please…”

“So-no!”

“That’s very good…very good progress…now sit down…”

“So-no!” She yells out as she stumbles and wobbles all over the bed, assuming that it was game of tag they were playing as she ran the other way each time Tae tried to catch her. It hurts to laugh but it’s impossible not to as I watch them…Soo’s ecstatic giggles echo through the house, her little hands clapping in excitement as she came to take cover at my side and curled beside me.

“She’s a brat for sure” he seems really troubled, panting as he gave up and came to sit on my other side.

“I thought you said you were really good at looking after her” I taunt knowing full well how much trouble taking care of her all alone must have been for him when I went to work.

“I lied” he leans back to rest against the pillows he set there for me and I struggle trying not to laugh because oh god it fucking hurts so much!

“You know you could’ve told me that” I turn to see Soo crawling over my thighs to get in between us, and Tae pulls her onto his lap.

“I might not be good at it but we enjoyed it…didn’t we Soo?” His eyes are so fond as he gazes down at her “we went grocery shopping…we went to the park, sometimes…and she even helped me choose our rings…she’s a brat but she’s a good brat” he smiles when she clutches at his shirt to stand up.

“Da-dda…play…so-no” “No…you can’t play with snow…you’ll catch a cold” Tae cuts her plea off but Soo isn’t really an abiding kid.

“Little cold…little play” she bargains with him in her weird vocabulary and I could see Tae was accustomed to it by now.

“No ‘little play’ will get you lots of cold…no playing out in the snow” Tae asserts and she grumbles at him, tugging on his shirt “no…calm down…it’s too cold outside for you Soo, you’ll get sick” he caresses her trying to get her to settle down as uses his affectionate side.

She looks at me, complaining with her eyes before she turns back towards him and coils her arms around his neck, whining to get what she wants.

This is the reason it’s so difficult to tell her ‘no’, she is annoyingly resilient but its endearing to see the way she has slowly established the bond with Tae. She’s not overly affectionate with him, her moody side often fails to win over when it’s against Tae so that troubles her but she is aware that she is allowed to depend on him, that she is allowed to demand his attention…that she is allowed to complain and hug him as she pleases.

I know half her moody whims and habit of being sceptic around people she doesn’t know is my fault, I was too scared to let her mingle with people I didn’t know…I denied to attend community gatherings, was too scared to take her to the park every day and actually feared taking her along when I went out to the stores…I was always too careful with her and it ended up making her look at people who came to interact with her with untrusting eyes.     

And growing up I could see how it would affect her…or would have if it hadn’t been for Taehyung.

“Oh my god! It is true!” Joy runs from across the counter as we enter the same diner that Jimin’s family owned, the one we often visited when we had been here the last time.

“Yeah…I’m sure Jimin told you” Tae chuckles, smiling and greeting her.

“God I can’t believe this…omo, she’s so adorable” she hugs Tae before coming up to me and doing the same and Soo watches her with a troubled frown, jerking away when Joy touches her cheeks and grumbles looking up at me.

“Don’t be like that, say hello…she wants to be your friend” I try to assure her and Joy watches us with a half smile.

“It’s ok, I think she’s a little shy” her fondness is evident in her voice.

“She’s anything but shy” I chuckle “she just needs a little time to get accustomed I guess”

“Yeah, she’s been through a lot…so have you, I heard from Jimin what happened.”

“Yeah…we’re lucky we survived” I smile back at her as Tae pulls Soo to himself, seating her as he tried to look busy “things are getting better now.”

“So, it’s really true” she turns to Tae “you defeated Axel…”

An abrupt seriousness looms over us at those words and I see Tae going absolutely silent suddenly before he looks at her.

“Yeah…I guess we did…in the end we actually won” his eyes come to fall on mine and I can finally see that the guilt and confusion that had been lurking in his gaze for weeks were finally fading away. All those pieces of shattered dreams, frayed hopes and broken identity coming together with the will to survive, power to prove his purpose and dare to build a life again for himself…for us.

We were finally beginning to heal…and with healing comes more beautiful aspects.

The decision to settle here was a good change, maybe even the best one if only we had the others to meet up with on the weekends, it sure does get a little lonely at times. But the way this change was healing us was phenomenal…so much so that there were often times I forgot that we had a past we were trying to run away from when we came here.

It surely feels like a whole new chance at love and life again.

“No like carr’ts”

“Soo…don’t do that” I go through the dairy aisle to grab at the necessaries and see her putting away the things in the cart she didn’t like while I’m busy. I swear no kid here is as difficult to deal with as she is.

“No like brok-lee”

“I said don’t do that” I grab back at the things and put them in the cart “no veggies=no ice cream…that’s the rule remember?”

She pouts fidgeting and looking defeated.

“Done?” Tae comes around the corner, dropping a few packs of snacks into the cart and Soo instantly turns to him, making grabby hands to him.

“Up..up…” and the moment Tae picks her up she takes the chance to get what she wants “I’wan ice cream.”

“You won’t be able to have dinner if you have ice cream now” I speak before she gets the idea that she could win her way like this.

“There’s still time till dinner” Tae says, going over to get her what she wanted and Soo grins doing a little happy dance before coiling her arms around his neck and completely ignoring me. Honestly, I agree with Tae on this…she is a sly little brat for sure.

And yet it was so beautiful to see her be herself more and more everyday as the months passed, opening like a bud as we learnt alongside her how to be enough for her.

Life tends to be so hard at times…a day almost never enough to do everything that we want to and we end up forgetting to look into the little things that are actually not that little.

Like the waffles Tae would make sometimes, carefully topped with strawberry and whipped cream was a sign of a grand breakfast and it almost always had an underlying message that either he was too happy or he had something happy to share or sometimes just because there was nothing happy happening and a good breakfast was the best gift he could give me.

Like Soo not asking to go out to see the trees or the lake almost always meant she was not in her best for some reason and you would find her whining and grumbling and being moody all evening till I would sit with her and ask her to tell me why she was so troubled, and she’d break out in tears saying something about losing a toy or accidentally breaking one.

Our souls are messy things…our bodies even messier and the most difficult thing we often struggle with is dealing with the fact that we are not our best most of the time…and its okay to tell ourselves to be a little less than perfect on some days…to be a little slow…a little less sharp…take a breather before we chase that vision of perfection again.

I had to learn a lot about myself as well, and in doing so I learnt a lot about where I was faltering and the more I tried to understand my own self, I ended up realizing how Tae and I could do better together. With all the tension and fear gone, we seemed to be finally able to focus solely on ourselves and our family, and along with our personal growth and realizations, I could tell we were healing together as well.

Especially after the day we got married.

I’d like to say our wedding day was a dream-like dawning to a new beginning but honestly it was just like walking back home after another visit to the lake by the forest, my heart just as tranquil and cleared of anxiousness as I let the feeling settle. There were no doubtful jitters or apprehension for an unknown future, I had forever known he was the one for me…and I will always be his, till death do us part.

“The house looks way better now” Hobi says looking around as we gather after celebrations.

Jimin and Joy had planned the dinner party at the diner and it was a rather delightful to see everyone travel so far just to attend and enjoy the simple event. We tried to keep it among friends, opting to enjoy the day with them rather than spend on extravagant show and right now watching them roam about the house, glasses in hand and wide happy smiles on their faces was the best feeling anyway.

“We had to make a few changes” I replied, watching Soo rushing towards Yoongi as Minjae chased after her, her loud giggles tramping over the light music that Hobi had put on to go with the cheery mood.

My eyes trace over the living room to see Tae nowhere in sight and it got me a little curious, then I realized neither was Kook or Namjoon and now I am even more curious, as well as a little worried.

A part of me knows that Tae is many things but at heart he is still the soldier he had pledged to be and I know that if there are things that could be mend by his actions then he’d not think twice before deciding to jump to take the opportunity…and truthfully, I am proud of that…I am proud to know that I love a man who doesn’t fear to take a step to do the right thing.

But then there’s a part of me who is selfish and wants to keep him all for myself.

I walk about realizing they aren’t in the house and passing a window I notice them sitting on a step on the porch outside as the day slowly turned to a crimson dusk at their back.

They were talking, nodding and smiling at intervals as they shared beers, their suit jackets left in a crumple beside them on the wooden floor and neckties loosened around their necks. The scene sent a sense of comfort through me as a long-held worry got erased as I watched Namjoon sling an arm around Tae’s shoulder as he smiled at him and Kook smiled beside them. 

A flicker of something happy and a rush of serenity took over me to see Tae and Kook finally getting along with each other, something I never really thought could happen. But I heaved a sigh of relief as I remembered the words Kook told me in the morning.

The last few months I barely talked about him with Tae or about the fact that I had seen Tae shoot him that night. Part of me was really angry with Kook knowing he had agreed to hand Soo to Byun, I really couldn’t believe my ears when he had said that and for a moment I really didn’t question Tae shooting him…I would have probably reacted the same way if I had to stand there and listen to him saying that.

Although Hobi had later assured me that things were fine and Kook had confessed that whatever he had said that night was mostly because it was a desperate time and all he was looking for was to get all of us out of there…he had merely said it to trick Byun. So, this morning when he said apologized, I too did the same…I knew I had to, on behalf of both Tae and myself for not trusting him enough.

But the next thing he said left me speechless…

…flashback begins…

“You look stunning” Kook smiles, front teeth peeking as his eyes crinkle and yet I see him gulping next, scratching his head as he tries to excuse himself but suddenly stops midway and turns back to stare at me with those troubled sienna eyes.

He fidgets for a long minute before speaking again “I really debated if I should come here” his eyes drop to the little box in his hand, teeth digging into his lower lip as he exhales loudly “I have to tell you something…and it’s actually not for you but I just need to get it off my chest, I don’t think I’ll be able to put it behind me otherwise.... so just let me do this, I guess...”

I blink at him, my teeth digging on the inside of my lip because I have a feeling I know what he’s going to say.

“I have feelings for you Jin…and I have had them for a really long time”

I stand frozen, eyes dead set on his as he stares back at me and I really have nothing to say... I'm in love with Taehyung, we have a child and I'm getting married to him today....why on earth would Kook think this is a right time to let me know that?!

“And I feel like shit for saying this now, today is not the day I should be doing this” he chuckles but its’ a sad attempt to lighten the grim awkwardness that hovers around “I guess it’s always bad timing for me but I’m trying…I’m working on myself since the past few months…”

He runs a hand through his hair, scratching the back of his head again before he looks back at me and I stand just as dumb, not really having anything to say.

“It’s alright Jin…not like I’m asking you for an answer…I know you love him and I am happy for you, I really am and I really wish to stay happy and well always. I’m just-sorry…really sorry…you’ve been so good to me and I feel like I betrayed you in some way…betrayed our friendship and your trust so many times…maybe that’s one of the reasons I could never tell you about how I felt about you…I felt ashamed of my feelings”

“You’re still my friend Kook…you don’t have to be ashamed” I don’t know what else to say.

He goes a little silent, eyes staying on me and it looks like there’s something going on in his mind.

“But I’m thankful too” his voice is low this time “for everything…and that’s the reason I came here today, I know it’s a big day for you…I know…” he smiles at me “and as your friend I must be there on your big day because I’ve decided to stand by you, just the way you did for me…”

He walks up to me, and hands me a box labelled as ‘For the future you have pictured’ “hope you like it” he smiles fixing my lapel flower “congratulations Jin.”

The hug felt just like all those times earlier and that odd tension I had felt in him at times earlier was gone.

“Thanks Kook...and thank you for everything you have done for me...” and with those words I realised that there are some things you cannot suffice with just a 'thank you', just like there were some people to whom no amount of showing your gratification would be enough.

…flashback ends…

And as I stand here, I realize how hard it really has been to get here…how much we endured…how much we held on…struggled…suffered…and yet right now this picture before me, the air surrounding us and the music playing the background seems like an assurance of something beautiful to look forward to…something too precious to cherish for everlong.

Things were beautiful after a very long time…and something echoed within me saying it would be like this from here on…

They choose to leave soon after, Namjoon and Jimin opted to spend the night at Jimin’s parents because they were overjoyed to have them after so long, especially Minjae. Hobi said he wanted to check on their house and Kook left along with them and Soo began grumbling and whining to see everyone suddenly gone till the day’s exhaustion made her fall asleep.

“She ate a lot of cake…and skipped dinner” he informed handing Soo to me, and I could see the bruises on her knees due to how many times she had stumbled while running around with Jae.

“Joy said we could let her join the playschool by the diner in a couple more months” I spoke watching Tae gathering up the leftovers and cleaning the living room while I changed Soo out of the dress we had gotten her for the event.

“What?” He sounds taken aback by the thought “she’s like one…it’s too early”

“She’ll be two in three months Tae” I chuckle hearing him and turn to see him walking out of the kitchen to come closer. His hair is dishevelled, the crisp white shirt marked with patches he had earned over the day, necktie gone and yet his eyes looked just the same pleased as they were while I stared back at him at the altar, when we promised to cherish every living moment together.

“Still too early…school’s not an easy place you know and she’s so little”

I know, how can I not…it’s how we had actually met. I used to get bullied in school too.

“Maybe you could teach her some self-defence before we send her to school” I joke as I lay her down in her crib and Tae switches the night light that made stars glimmer all over the room.

“I plan to” he speaks rather matter-of-factly “I’d be damned if I let any idiot bully my child.”

And I could tell he meant every word he said which made me think back to the day he had first approached me while I hid in that alleyway, ashamed if myself…ashamed of not being brave enough to stand up for myself…I would never ever want Soo to go through something like that.

“Hck!” My eyes fly wide as I instinctively grasp at his shirt and realize with a shock that he had picked me up “what-” “We can plan about all that tomorrow…let’s wash up, it’s our wedding night after all.”

We have been taking things slow after I got shot, Tae’s been very careful about touching me and we’ve been intimate only a handful of times in the last few months. So, when he pushed me against the wall while his mouth trailed kisses on my shoulders and down my spine, I felt euphoric.

His hand grazed down my side to set on my hip, while his other arm wrapped around my waist to set over my belly as he held me close to his warmth and I could feel how turned on he was when his heated privates pressed against my butt.

“Tae” my voice is a whine as my nails scrape on the wet tiles, the water running down our bodies as he rocks his hips against me. He sets his hand atop mine, his fingers weaving to fill up the gaps in mine as he wraps his palm over mine.

His breathing is rather rough and heavy at my neck as the hand on my belly crawls lower to tease and a whine breaks out of me as he drives me crazy for more. I let my head loll back to rest against his shoulder, whimpers spilling beyond my control as pleasure thrums through my flesh in wild waves and all the while he keep his mouth pressed to my skin, busy sucking marks and placing kisses all over my neck.

“Nghh ah Tae…I” my other hand moves behind me to grasp at his hip as I try not to lose my mind when I feel my body shudder with the building orgasm.

Sadly, that’s exactly when he decides that it was time to stop and I trace through hazy eyes as he cuts the water off.

“Let’s shift this to the bed…get you comfortable” he pecks at my nose as he carries me into the room, and within seconds I’m on my back with his body hovering over me. The sheets become a crumpled damp mess, our bodies way too warm and excited.

He doesn’t hesitate to place himself in between my thighs, spreading them and squeezing them as he lay bare his growing greed for me. The bottle of lube tossed a little distance away after he was sure that I was prepped well enough.

“Tae…I…” I don’t know if it’s the right time to say it but I have been thinking about it for quite a while…to be honest since the day he asked me to marry him.

“What is it?” He strokes himself while another hand cups underneath my thigh to hook it around his waist.

“Umm…” I blink at him feeling my cheeks heat up, so I move my eyes to a side as I utter the words “I haven’t been taking birth control for the past couple weeks…and I don’t want to take a pill tomorrow either”

I don’t know why I’m mumbling…or why is it such a big deal to tell him that I want us to have another baby…but it just is…I know Soo can be a handful but I want Tae to experience it this time…experience the birth of our child which he missed last time and I know how he regrets it…so if possible, I want to give that to him.

It takes him a little time to understand what I meant and when he does get it, the smile that he tries to bite down is utterly worth everything “are you sure about that? Your body-” “I’m fine…it doesn’t hurt…I am perfectly healed I swear” I assure as I cup his face “I want to”

“I’ve been meaning to ask you the same thing but couldn’t with everything that you had to go through” even his voice sounds guilt stricken as he noses at my cheek before I feel his smile against my skin “I swear it’d be the best wedding gift ever…” he pulls back, looking at me with deep pleased eyes.

“What?”

“You’re beautiful…”

I chuckle, trying again to do away with the heat that rushes to my cheeks “okay”

His hands settle on either side of my head “I swear baby…I’d be so lost without you”

“I love you too” I coil my arms around him as he moves to press his lips on mine, mouth hungry and demanding as he wastes no time to plunge his tongue into my mouth, our tongues wrapping as we chase the feeling of ecstasy that we can be for the other.    

“Mhmnnghh…” the kiss breaks and my caressing hands turn to rough grasps on him as he pushes into me, making our bodies one as he makes love to me,  our bodies rocking in a rhythm as he moans at my neck. He clasps at my hand, pinning it on the bed as he threads his fingers with mine and our rings glisten against the moonlight that spills through the curtain to dimly illuminate the room.

Yes…we’ve been battered and wrecked and pulled apart by life all the time…but he always chose to come back to me…he chose to be weak and break only before my eyes when all the world demanded to see him destroyed…and I tried…I tried with everything I had to let him know that nothing can destroy him…they could try their best but I wouldn’t let them win…

And that wasn’t even the miracle…

The miracle was that he believed I could save him…and no matter how far he slipped away from me…he chose the same broken road to come back to me…and god bless that broken road that led him straight to me.

…10 years later…

“Oh my god Soo…what happened to you?” I rush to her side as she holds a scowl and ignores me to walk into the kitchen without a word. I hear the car door close and Tae appears with a proud smile at the door with Hyuk tailing sheepishly by his side, his state an equal mess as Soo’s.

“You did not” I stare at him with disbelief, this was exactly what I warned him not to do.

“What? I just proved how much they are still lacking in the skills”

“It was supposed to be a paint ball game!” I swear I am so done with him by now…my babies look like they’ve been through hell and back, faces blotched with paint, hairs sticking out on every side and clothes dirtied.

“He cheated! Again!” Soo yells from the kitchen stomping out with a bag of chips and some pudding cups.

“I did not cheat” “You said you’d play fair…but then you cheated” she argues with him “tell Appa what he did Hyuk-ie”.

It’s been the same thing for years, they love paint ball games…something they picked up early on, of course because Tae would often take them to play when I got too busy with my work and they’d get whiny on how to spend the weekends.

But the one problem that arose over time was…they’d be desperate to win against Tae while he denied to go easy on them.

Hyuk walks up to me and I sigh seeing his brown hairs clumped blue and yellow and red. Sometimes I really feel sorry for my little boy, he isn’t aggressive or grumpy like Soo and enjoys simpler stuff like riding a bike by the lake and watching the fishes scurry in the water yet the poor thing always gets stuck between Soo and Tae’s constant clash.

“Dad used his skills” he reports like an obedient comrade to his leader.

“Yeah…he really did…and he wasn’t supposed to” Soo yells to assert even more strongly of the point she wanted to establish as wrong and Hyuk nodded as I cleaned the paint off of his face. He has the same box smile as Tae and even the mole under his eye matches with his dad’s but unlike Soo, his eyes resemble my own.

“I was only teaching you” Tae clears and Soo gives him a mean glare “that’s not gonna get you anywhere young lady…you can win when you deserve to”.

And I am totally face-palming internally…yes I have one fear these days…Soo is going to grow up to become an exact replica of Tae.

This clash between them is actually because Soo terribly idolizes Tae…even when Tae had just started teaching her self-defence techniques, or barely taught her the baby steps in taekwondo, she’d get overexcited. Her favourite bedtime stories happened to be the ones Tae would tell them from his experiences at the defence academy or the adventures there after, obviously skipping the harsher parts and while Hyuk listened to those as stories and fell asleep soon after, Soo wouldn’t let him go till it was too late into the night…I have seen her proudly declaring among her friends that her dad was a hero and had saved many people.

She even follows him doggedly…not to mention she was born with most of his traits-self-driven, resilient and that ‘laugh in the face of danger’ attitude on her really terrifies me at times.  

Especially after we were called to her school by the principal.

Oh no…I am not talking about her being suspended for doing something vile…that’s what you’d expect from any pubescent kid but we were called because the principal wanted to let us know that she was very proud of Soohee for naming the bullies who were creating troubles for other kids at school.

But she also let us know that our barely a teenaged girl had used her taekwondo skills to almost cripple a group of seventeen-year-olds who were bullying a girl, and it is forbidden to use a sport in a fight because she could lose her chance to compete in the championships in future.

“Guess what…” she finishes chomping on her food as she jumps off her seat “one day I’m gonna be a better soldier than you…and then I’ll win.”

The words make me freeze as my head snaps towards Tae who stares straight at Soo, a smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth as he nods at her “okay…I’ll wait for it.”

The End

...to the brave and broken-hearted who have taught us how to rise after a fall. Your courage is contagious...

á na márië.

[A\N] And with this we come to the end of this story 💜

This is the first story I ever wrote n truly it has been a journey, I learnt so much about so many things as well as so much about myself while trying to create this...

Thank you all for walking along with me through this journey 🥺✨

Borahae!