#Warning: Mentions violence and blood

Seokjin’s P.O.V.

The minute we succeeded in rescuing Hobi we were caught by Byun and dragged out into the open right where Kai met us, grandly declaring his win against the plans of the General to trap him, and how he had rightfully given him the deserving return gift by killing him.

But right now as I sat cornered in fear with Hobi constantly losing blood, his strength failing him in even keeping his eyes open, I am not really sure how much of our rescue and plan to kill Kai is going to actually work.
I guarded Hobi, watching Kook hold his gun at us as he turned to Tae for the signal to attack Kai.

My eyes moved to find him in a rash scuffle with the silver-haired man, his wounds crippling him against his cruel opponent as he roared in pain and stumbled every time the man hit at those. He was thrown on the ground and instantly Byun had his gun aimed at him, finger on the trigger and my blood turned ice.

But before I could even begin to think of something to get him out of his fatal position a shot echoed and my head snapped back to see Kook, who fell to his knees and blood gushed down his stomach.

Our eyes met right before Kai came to drag him away, and I saw a tear dribble down his eyes as he silently mouthed ‘I am sorry’ to me.

Something snapped within me, taking me back to those days when he began to visit my home, when he was the shy guy, silent and fidgety, always apologizing for being different from ‘normal’.

And all through the time I’ve known him he has apologized so much, about every little thing, about all the disguises, about the lies, and sadly even about the truths. Life had paved a path of apologies for him because he has been trying forever to turn away from the darkness he had been born into, trying to fight all the voices in his head, apologizing in every step for being confused about where he belonged.

I know I have to do something, I can’t just let him die! It’s Kook for godsakes! He’s forever been there for me, no matter how twisted things got, he has been there and there’s no way I can watch him die right in front of my eyes!

I set Hobi to lean against the wall, shuffling to find the gun Tae had handed me. Terror grew within me as I heard Kai growl at Kook, hitting and kicking him as he groaned in pain and his steps faltered.

“Don’t!” I saw Kai push the gun at the side of his head this time and sprang from my place as I brushed off Hobi’s warnings, my shivering hands gripping too tightly at the weapon and before I knew it my fingers pressed on the trigger in their own volition.

My mind went blank as I felt recoil after recoil sent tremors through my hands, and I felt so enraged, brutality was never my thing but this man wasn’t made for empathy.

Visions of the bloodied carcasses at the airport after they had bombed the place flashed through my mind, the people with their throats slit open whom I had seen back at that warehouse spread out like a canker in my inward eye, every single pain Taehyung had gone through, every torture he had put Kook to bear since his early childhood, the loss of thousands of innocent lives, millions of families grieving their loved ones all because of this man.

My lungs ached with breathlessness as I watched him drop down, and realized in my frenzy I had emptied the entire mag. I saw Kook watching me with disbelief in his eyes and was about to go to help him when from the corner of my eye I saw Taehyung rush towards me, his eyes wide with terror as he turned about to place himself right in front of the gun Byun had aimed at me.

The world around me blurred out as I ran to him realizing what he was trying to do, and God I had never seen true fear as closely as I did now. My survival instincts could be called messed up but truthfully survival wasn’t important if it comes at the price of losing the one I want to survive with.

But fate didn’t seem to be on my side, leaving me to helplessly curse at myself.

My senses froze as I heard the shots fire, and felt his body crash on mine as he lost his footing and stumbled back into my arms.

And at the moment I held all the grief in the world that stunned me, fear gripping onto me like a barbed wire as my heart cracked beat by beat into pieces.

“No! Oh God, please no!”

My arms tightened around him, I wanted to cry, yell for help, move, do something but I had lost all my senses.

I promised I’d save him, that I’d take him home and see him smile again. I promised...

“Don’t close your eyes Tae, look at me, don’t close your eyes goddammit!!”

His lashes fluttered, and I could see the focus in his eyes dwindling.

“I’m f-fine, don’t c-cry ba-aby” he stuttered, caressing my fingers as I fumbled not knowing how to stop the blood streaming down his chest.

We were almost there, so close to the good days with you …I have waited so long to hold you in my arms again, but not like this...

“I-Idiot! Why...why would you do that?!”

A line of blood ran down the corner of his mouth and pooled at my thigh, and I realized he is soon going to go into shock, the bullets must have pierced through his lungs. My heart wailed as he smiled through the pain, his face growing paler by the second and body shuddering at the loss of breath. He gurgled up more blood, and his pulse grew weaker as I held him tighter to myself.

Please, just hold on a bit more...

Namjoon rushed in and moved my hands from the bullet wounds on his chest, patting at his cheek to clear his looming haze. “Taehyung! Can you hear me? I’m gonna pick you up okay? Just put your weight on me” and that was when my trance broke and I realized the roar of commands and sirens all around, saw Jackson pick up Kook as they stumbled towards a car where Hoseok already sat.

A chill ran down my veins when my eyes met Byun’s, his face just plain ice cold as he walked with his hands cuffed behind his back being pushed by a group of officers while his piercing eyes followed me till they shoved him inside another of those patrol cars.

“They want him at the headquarters” Jackson huffed at us as we carried an almost unconscious Taehyung to Namjoon’s car.

“There’s no way I am taking him there in this condition, he needs medic-“ “If you take him to a hospital they’re going to put him under surveillance instantly, and if not he’ll be declared a fugitive”.

Namjoon’s jaw tightened at the information, as I pulled Tae closer to myself inside the car “can we please talk about these later, I need him alive! Please!”

“Call Yoongi Jin” Namjoon said handing me his phone and hurrying to start the car as Jackson accompanied us. All through the drive my fears kept getting the best of me as I saw him slip deeper and deeper into risk, and cradled his head trying to make it easier for him to breathe easy as I kept on telling him, and more to myself, to hold on, that we’re going to get him all better, that he is going to be fine.

Half n’ hour later I was sitting at the nursing home Yoongi practiced at, Namjoon and Jackson’s voices in the background were mere rumbles as I sat watching my hands on my lap. They left to check on Hoseok and Jungkook who had been taken to the hospital, promising to come back soon and told me to keep them notified.

And I have no idea how many minutes passed by as I sat like that, watching patches of Taehyung’s blood dry on my hands, clotting thickly on my fingers, hiding away the lines on my hands as well as all the wishes of the future I had dreamed with him.

He can’t die…he won’t…no way…please don’t go, don’t leave me on my own like this…

My fingers curled as I pressed my eyes close, finally letting myself open to the waves of guilt, pain and weakness that hurled itself over me, and I felt tears stream down my face without restrain.

Yes, I am selfish…I don’t care how much pain you have endured all this time that made you look forward to death, I don’t care how easy it feels for you to just give up on life and let go, I need you to stay…despite all the grief and all the pain, I need you to stay, even if it’s only for me.

“P-Plea-se..” my sobs gobbled up the pleas as I cried my heart out “ple-ease...”

I don’t care if the world calls you lethal, you have always been my safe.

“His left lung had been severely damaged, he lost a lot of blood Jin” I held my head in my hands, trying my best to hold in the sobs but it is so hard, so hard to sit here and listen to this with a steady heart, and I am only human.

“He fought his best, and I did try but his body was too weak from the torture” Yoongi sighed “let’s just wait for now, give it some time”

“He is going to be okay, right?” I ask holding on to all the hope in the world.

“His heart’s still beating, it’s just his brain and body that’s not coping up. He is in a coma Jin, whatever I say is only an assumption. We'll have to wait the next 24 hours to know if he is out of the risk zone” Yoongi’s eyes were almost consoling as he stared at me “he’s lucky, the bullets missed his heart by a millimeter”.

I gave him a nod, trying to be understanding and accept the reality but my foolish heart wouldn’t stop aching, and I kept on brushing away the unruly tears rolling down my cheeks in their own volition.

“Go home” I blinked stupidly at him, my brain was still too confused to grasp at everything “when was the last time you had something to eat? You look awful”. He got up from his seat and came to where I sat to hand me fresh clothes “there’s a shower in my cabin, go freshen up. You’re going to end up getting sick if you keep being like this”

I realized I still looked like a zombie in dirty blood soaked clothes, and took the suggestion.

The shower sure helped a lot, especially because right after I freshened up Namjoon informed me that both Hobi and Kook had successful surgeries and were resting safely at the same hospital where Jimin had been admitted earlier.

I denied to go home, pleading to Yoongi to not worry about me and go check on Hobi. He really has unnatural strength of composure but the worry seeps through at times and I could see that as I watched him talk to Namjoon every five minutes till he was sure they were alright.

For hours I sat outside the ICU, often peering through the round glasses at those sealed doors to see a million tubes and ducts strapped on Taehyung, fearsome devices surrounded him and that pulsing green line running incessantly to show his stable beating heart.

I sighed at the sight “they can’t kill you Tae, they can’t… you need to win this fight too and I promise I’ll fight all the rest for you”

I gulped down the sob threatening to spill out, telling myself he is strong enough to win this and tears seeped down as I pressed my eyes close.

Praying...

With every fleeting breath of mine only praying for him to wake up.

á na márië

[A/N] Thank you all for making Winter Bear cross 10k views!!!! I'm so grateful for all the love and support you give the story 😭😭

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