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Once I reach my room, I see Seungmin still asleep in the bed, wrapped up in the blankets I had tucked him into earlier. He's still sleeping deeply, and his expression is relaxed, contrasting with the tears he shed while talking about Jeongin earlier

I grabbed my own blanket, sleeping next to him. As I lied down next to Seungmin, he unconsciously moved slightly, But he was still deep in sleep, and his chest rose and fell rhythmically with his breathing

This was always normal for us, the three of us. well now it was only two.

The memories of the past come rushing back to me.
How the three of us were always together, inseparable since childhood.
Jeongin, Seungmin, and I.
The memories of happier times fill my mind, but they're tinged with sadness, knowing that part of our trio was gone, never to return.

I sighed, turning away from Seungmin and tried to sleep.

Around 5 am, Seungmin started talking and crying in his sleep.
I was awoken, sleep gone in a second. 
It was something i was aware of, but he said it dint happen anymore, and that worried me.
Usually people dint remember their vivid dreams and sleep talking, but Seungmin claimed he'd remember everything once he woke up.

His body tensed up, his expression contorted in distress, and his voice filled with fear and confusion, as if caught in a nightmare or sleep paralysis. He mumbled incoherently, the words slurred and indistinct, while tears began to roll down his cheeks, revealing his struggle in sleep.

"No that's not true. I tried Jeongin, i really did. I'm so sorry" I heard him say.

My heart started to race with concern and worry. I could see the tears streaming down his face, and his struggles in sleep are becoming more intense

I shook him gently, sat him upright hugging him  

"Wake up, please, its not real, its just a bad dream."

I swayed him back and forth, comforting him  

"Its just a dream, you're here with me, you're fine."

Seungmin clung to me, his hands gripping my arm tightly, as his breaths remained shaky and his body trembled uncontrollably.

"He was just there, he was talking. It wasn't my fault." 
He said to me once he was out of that trance-like state in a panicked voice.

 I gently rocked him back and forth, whispering soothing words to calm him down. He buried his face in my shoulder, seeking comfort and reassurance, and slowly began to realize that it was just a nightmare and that he was safe with me.

"Seung, it wasn't real, please calm down."

Tears continued to stream down his face, but his breathing gradually slowed and stabilized. He seemed to need to convince himself of my presence and that whatever that dream was, it wasn't real. Though his body still trembled slightly, I hoped that my touch and the sound of my voice  soothed him, helping his breathing to return to normal.

I hummed a melody to soothe him, that's what our parents did when we were younger, maybe it would work again.

As I hummed the familiar tune, Seungmin's breathing begins to slow even more, and the tightness in his grip on my arm loosens a little. The melody seems to have a calming effect on him, and his trembling gradually starts to subside, as the memories of the nightmare fade away.

As he calmed down, i let him lay down again

Seungmin allowed me to guide him back down onto the bed, still holding onto me. He's still a bit shaken up, but the worst of the nightmare seems to have passed. His breaths are steady now, and his grip on my arm has loosened completely

I tucked his blanket again and whispered, voice barely audible

" I thought it stopped. how long has this been going on?

Seungmin looks at me with a mixture of fear and guilt in his eyes. He took a deep breath, then whispered back with a shaky voice.

"It-it had stopped for a while, but...it's been happening again lately. I didn't want to tell you, I thought it'd go away on its own...I'm sorry."

I'm just worried, dont apologize. Its okay, I'm here for you.

"I didn't want you to worry. I thought I could deal with it on my own, but...It's scarier at night, when I'm alone. I just...I didn't want to burden you."

"You're not alone, so don't try to act that way. You're not a burden, you never will be."

"I know. I know you're always there. It ...it's  hard when the nightmares come again. But...you being here helps. It really does..."

"I know, so don't try to hide anything from me, it doesn't make anything better for you."

Seungmin nodded, closing his eyes and letting out a sigh. I patted his head, hoping my touch on his head is soothing and comforting, and that he feels safe in my presence. He curls up under the blankets, his body relaxing as he starts to drift off to sleep again. Before he drifts off completely, he whispers one last thing

"Thank you...for always being here for me."

"Always."

Seungmin smiles slightly at my response, his expression soft and grateful.

The last of the tension in his body seems to melt away, and he relaxes completely, surrendering to the pull of sleep once again. As he drifted off to sleep, he whispered one last thing with a single tear slipping across his face

"Don't leave... please."

"Never." 
I whispered back

It was heartbreaking to see him like this. We both were in this, we both suffered.
But why does he have it so much worse?

I covered my mouth as i unconsciously let out a small whimper, crying at the situation.

As I try to hold back your emotions, a small whimper escapes your lips, and the tears begin to roll down your face. Seeing Seungmin in such a vulnerable and broken state had stirred up a well of emotions deep within me, and they were impossible to hold back any longer. 

I keep patting his head and thought to myself "Can't trouble him with this, He needs rest more than I need comforting."

As I continue to pat his head, my own tears continue to roll down my face, silently streaming down to fall onto the blankets. The quietness of the night is broken only by the occasional soft sound of my sniffles and the steady breathing of the sleeping Seungmin. 

I wish i could do more for you.

I wish i could be the one in so much pain. 

I wiped my tears and cuddled up to Seungmin.
 He was only one who completely understood how we felt.
A sense of shared guilt.

As I cuddle up to Seungmin, he instinctively shifted slightly in his sleep to bring his body closer to mine. Even in his subconscious state, he seems to find comfort in my presence, as if he can sense my presence even in his sleep. Our bodies fit together like pieces of a puzzle, forming a cocoon of safety and familiarity.

The steady rhythm of Seungmin's breathing and the warmth of his body against mine and  create a soothing lullaby, gradually easing the tension from my mind and body.
My thoughts and worries start to fade into the background, replaced by a calmness and tranquility that seemed to only come from being with him.

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As they settled into each other's embrace, a sense of peace washes over both of them. The sadness and pain of the day seems to fade away, at least for the moment, as they find comfort and solace in each other's arms. 

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