☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

°•. ┊ Wildest Dreams ┊.•°
✧ ˚ ━ burning red, act one

CHAPTER FIVE — gremlins

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I get into my aircraft, adjusting my helmet a bit, and a wave of familiarity crashes into me along with a number of memories. One more prominent than the rest; the moment that preceded the last flight I ever took.

I'm walking down the tarmac with my helmet in my hands, as the sun is beating down on me. A voice from behind me grabs my attention and I spin around to find Jake running up to me. He takes my free hand into his own and opens his mouth to say something, but hesitates. "What Jake?" I ask, although the words seem harsh, my tone is soft, and even pleading. Pleading for something to let me know that our carnival date was more than just a means to an end.

"Come back to me?" It's less of a question and more of a plea. I release a breath of relief, as he takes away any doubt I had. He cares. It may not be in the same way that I do, but it's still something.

"Always." A sentiment that causes his features to soften and his shoulders to relax. Yes, we're just training. But after what happened to Goose all those years ago; I've never treated it as something simple or by the books. Because you never know what can happen. No, Jake and I aren't together. Yet, there's a mutual understanding that we don't want to lose the other. Our bond is deep and personal. It's a comfort that I've never felt with anyone else.

I shake my head, ridding myself of the thought, and get ready to take off. Once we're in the air, Maverick's voice sounds through our comms. "Good morning, Aviators, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to basic fighter maneuvers. Today's exercise is dog fighting. Guns only, no missiles. We do not go below the hard deck of 5,000 feet. Working as a team, our goal is to shoot down Nova and Lady Lilith, or else."

"Or else what?" Payback's tone is dripping with arrogance, causing a wide smirk to flash across my features. Oh, this is gonna be fun.

"Or else they'll shoot back." And with Mav's final statement, we're off. Trying to take down Maverick, Phoenix, Coyote, Jake, and Payback. The two of us are flying side by side, mentally trying to convey our plans to one another and knowing that in order to get Jake out of the running, we have to be strategic. And this is our practice run to see what works and what doesn't.

"Alright, Gremlin One, let's kick some ass." Lilith's voice sounds over my comms and I glance over at her, smiling at the nickname. When we were kids, Maverick would call us gremlins because we gave the man a run for his money. The two of us were chaotic and it wasn't smart to feed us after midnight, so he coined the nicknames. And we've milked them ever since. Coyote makes a confused remark about said name, causing Mav to encourage us to refrain from using them. As if either of us are going to listen to him right now...or ever.

"Roger that, Gremlin Two. Gremlin One, preparing to follow your lead." I respond, blatantly ignoring Mitchell's previous command. Lils makes a gesture, signaling for us to surround Payback and Phoenix. As we do so, Lilith gives me a heads up.

"Gremlin One, Dooku's solar sailer is to your back right!" We lock eyes, sharing a nod. Divide and conquer. I release a frustrated groan, begrudgingly giving up my previous conquest, and falling back, preparing to shoot him down. Fucking Coyote. I fly beneath him, hearing Lilith and Jake share a few playful remarks about her Star Wars reference and the Harry Potter reference that follows. I decide to make the pilot above me sweat and even feel secure in his current situation, before spinning around his aircraft. I line my head up with his own and watch the panic fill his eyes. A cheeky grin forms upon my face, as I pull up, and back, locking onto him and taking him out. Boom. "That's a hit, you're down, dad."

"So are you, Coyote." I add, while Mav mutters quietly to himself. Alright, here I come, Seresin. I look around for him, not seeing any sign of him. Shit. Out of my peripherals, I catch the slightest change in lighting, as something quickly passes over the bright sun. Gotcha. I pull up and his jet comes into my view, the two of us facing one another.

"You're not gonna win in a game of chicken, Rivera." His voice slices through me, filled with arrogance. The idea of crushing his ego seems to relax me a bit. We're the last two left.

"Wanna make a bet on that, Bagman?" My tone is harsh and pointed. Lilith releases a short laugh at the nickname, while Jake seems to fall silent. A smirk of pride finds its way onto my face. Payback is a bitch.

"So, Hangman, have you earned this crisp Benjamin, yet?" Coyote's voice is loud, as I help Penny carry in some of her newest beer order through the back door. I try to focus on my previous conversation with the woman, but fail in doing so as my name is heard. "Have you gotten Nova on her knees?" I nearly drop the case of beer on my foot at the crass question and the color must drain from my face because Penny's gives me a sad smile. Both of us quietly place the case down, as I continue to eavesdrop on their conversation.

"A gentleman never tells. It'd be crass." Jake says, taking his shot with the pool cue. His tone is ambiguous and cocky, ultimately telling them exactly what they need to know. "But you can hand that over now." Laughter erupts between the group and I begin to approach the table slowly, feeling a lump form in my throat. My reality crashing down. As the future between us fades into nothingness. Coyote places a hundred dollar bill into Jake's hands and then he takes notice of my presence, which causes the smile to fall from his face. He starts to awkwardly scratch the back of his neck, avoiding eye contact with me, as he gestures for Jake to turn around. As he does, his jaw goes slack, and his face goes pale. The man takes a step towards me, reaching out to place a hand on my shoulder. "Sawyer-"

"Don't." I throw my hands up and my voice comes out sharp. "I can't believe you. You know what? No, I can. What I can't believe is that I actually thought that I was different. That we were different. But clearly I was wrong. Goodbye, Jake." As I pass the proprietor, I send her a small and ingenuine smile, before grabbing my bag, and rushing out the door. I get into my car and throw my bag into the passenger seat, letting the tears fall from my eyes, and punching my steering wheel a few times. A knock on my window causes me to jump, quickly wiping my face, and turning to be met with a familiar set of green eyes. I ignore him and start my engine, pulling out of the parking lot as fast as possible, while fighting the urge to run him down with my car.

The next day at training I do my best to avoid him and it doesn't take much effort, as he seems to be doing the same. The hell is he hiding for? I'm the one who got screwed over. The entire day passes quickly, not that I was paying too much attention to anything going on. I slept like shit and woke up looking like a total corpse, which isn't surprising. I take my time in the shower, trying to wash away the memory of his hands on my skin, and silently crying. Once I've exhausted myself emotionally, I get out, and get dressed quickly, hoping to catch the sunset. As I'm walking out of the building, I drop my keys and a helping hand comes to my assistance. I find it belonging to the last person I want to see right now, or anytime in this life and the next. I pull my keychain out of his hands and brush past him, already feeling my eyes gloss over. He follows me, as a string of apologies fall from his lips. "One chance to explain. Please."

"What is there to explain, Jake?" I huff, asking it rhetorically. "I was a bet. It's fine. I get it. Doesn't mean I have to like it. Just leave me alone, please." The man stands in front of my car, blocking me from getting inside.

"Rivie, half-an-hour. That's all I need." He starts, the nickname making me wince. "Just take a drive with me, let me explain. And if you never want to speak to me again, fine. I'll leave you alone forever. And you can go back to hating me." I open my mouth to tell him that I've never hated him. Not truly. Strong distaste for him and his big ego; yes. But hate? Not even close. Even now, after all that he's done, I still can't hate him. I reluctantly agree and follow him to his truck, getting in, and sitting in silence for the entire drive. Some obscure country music station playing lowly in the background, as we pull into some port on the waterfront. I get out first, inhaling deeply, and leaning against the railing, watching the sunset. At least that part of my plan hasn't been disturbed. He comes to stand beside me. "When I agreed to the bet, we were already seeing each other. I just- I figured that it was an easy win-"

"Unbelievable. You are un-fucking-believable." I scoff, keeping my eyes forward, knowing that if I look at him; I'll shatter. "So, you thought that this was okay because it wasn't based on a bet? You lied to me. You used me, Jake. You used us. And just for a quick buck. How do you think I'll ever be able to trust you again? Or forgive you?"

"I messed up. I know." He exasperates, running his hands through his hair. "I'm sorry. I know that doesn't fix anything, but it's all I got." The desperation in his voice is evident, causing a tear to fall onto my cheek.

"Well, it isn't enough." I turn and start walking away from him, deciding to walk back to base if I have to. Whatever it takes to get away from him. He doesn't get to see me cry. Not over him.

"Where are you going?" He calls out after me. "Sawyer! What are you going to do? You gonna walk back?"

"If that's what it takes to get the hell away from you!" I snap with my back to him. I have every right to be angry and believe me, I am. I am livid. Yet that still felt awful. Yelling at him. It's made this feeling in my stomach, my heart, my whole body, a thousand times worse. My existence hurts. An existence without Jake. A painfully miserable existence.

"Don't be ridiculous." Jake huffs. "Just get in the car. Get in the car, Sawyer." I ignore him, continuing to walk away from him, and fighting tears. He seems to give up because that's where his protests end.

Using his shock to my advantage, I lock onto his aircraft and the target turns from green to red. Got him. "I win." And with that, we fly back to base, waiting for the greenlight to land. Once we do so, Lil's approaches me immediately and we hug victoriously.

"Smoothies?" She asks, as I watch Pete walk away from his daughter, defeated.

"Definitely." The two of us rush into the building, overly excited to get the hell out of here for a little while.

"What kind of smoothie do you want? I'll buy." Lils asks, as the two of us relax into our everyday clothing.

"Cherry." I smile and a thought crosses my mind, as I close my locker. "So, mini-girls day, I say we take advantage of the fact that I am an irresponsible mother and pull Maya out of school."

"Sure, I would love to meet her." Lily says, glancing over at me. "I vaguely remember talking to her about suckers." A slight laugh escapes my lips and we make our way to my car. Lil's was left at the Hard Deck because she was plastered last night, so driving was off the table. I start the car, my phone automatically connecting to bluetooth and playing 'All Too Well' by Taylor Swift. Well, this is a terrible song choice. My hands grip the steering wheel so tight that my knuckles are white. The drive is filled with our obnoxious singing, from the number of flashbacks we both get from the initial song. We pull up to the school, I put the car into park and the two of us head into the building. I share a few smiles with the familiar faces inside, while signing Maya out. They call her out of class over the loudspeaker. A few moments later, the quiet halls are filled with the sound of feet rushing towards us.

"Mom! Lilypop!" Maya shouts, colliding with my legs and causing a confused expression to cross Lilith's features.

"Ready to go, Little Bug?" Lil's questions looking down at the child standing before us. Maya gives her a nod and I smile at the interaction between the pair, as my daughter grabs my hand and begins to pull me towards the door. I make sure her seatbelt is secure, then return to my place in the driver's seat, taking us to a familiar smoothie place. The young girl asks where we're going and I fill her in, disconnecting my phone from the speakers, allowing Lilith to take control.

"We can listen to Taylor right?" A proud smile forms on my face at the question. Damn, I am raising her well. Never doubting my parenting skills again. Everyone in this car loves Taylor Swift. Lilith hands her phone back and instructs the girl to play whatever song she wants. The three of us order, each feeling a different flavor; I get cherry, Lilith gets blue raspberry, and Maya gets a mixture of the two. As we return to base, all of the windows are down and the wind is blowing our hair every which way, but we couldn't care less. It's a moment of pure bliss with two of my favorite people. We're all shouting the lyrics to '22' and surely pissing off anyone in the vicinity. I kill the ignition, as we all exit the vehicle and Maya runs off towards her uncle. I'm watching the pair with a smile, while Lilith and I approach the pair. I look over at the Hugo girl and take in the well-masked sorrow on her face and place my hand on her shoulder in an attempt of comforting her subtly.

"I'm fine, Sy Sy." She breathes, trying and failing at relieving my concern. The girl returns her attention to the people in front of us, causing me to do the same. Maya allows Jake to take a sip of her beverage, but it's not a flavor he seems to enjoy, as his face scrunches up slightly. I walk over to them and open my mouth to say, I'm not even sure what, but I get interrupted by Phoenix. She tells Lilith that some guy named Dean is here to see her. My brows furrowed in confusion and I turn to look at her; her face a mixture of emotions. Who the hell is Dean?

[word count: 2641]

lexi's letters; this took forever lol but chapters shouldn't be so far apart anymore bc that flight scene was brutal, but it's finally done :))