It has been a whole day, a whole day of me sitting in my kitchen and drinking tea. My mom came home late last night and told me how she was so mad that she couldn't speak, but Richie did. He blew up on his mother, telling her how she's never wanted anything good to happen to him and how bad of a parent she is, how she never loved hi and he tried so hard to love her. That's why he said he'd needed me, he needs to fill that void of a woman living him to make up for her empty shell of parenting. She ruined his life.

Bill and Eddie had to pick him up off the floor afterwards because he'd collapsed to his knees after and sobbed his eyes out. I'm so sorry Richie.

"He's worries that you won't ever talk to him again, he wants to come here but he thinks you need space too." I was informed a few hours into the day as Eddie sat with me.

"Eddie, I'm so tired of it, I try so hard to please these people because I'm gonna have to do it eventually. There's gonna be someone at school, work, in life who hates me and that's fine. I just...I can't sit there and listen to someone like her who said that they loved me to change their mind, why do they do that? Why did they change their minds? Why'd he leave, when you love someone you love them forever that's how it's supposed to go? I can't let her just sit around and remind me about everything I hate about myself!" He stared at me for a bit as I stood up and paced four paces up my kitchen then four paces the opposite direction.

"Are you gonna cry?" He asked me as he stood up. I put my head down then looked up at him.

"No..." tears welled in my eyes, "....yeah." I said as I began sobbing like a child. I'm supposed to be an adult, I wasn't supposed to hurt anymore, it wasn't supposed to hurt anymore.

"Do you want a hug?" He held his arms open. He was waiting for me, he knew I needed this. He knew that he was my dad and I was a people pleaser, I've always been.

"No..."I sighed as I cried, my breathing labored, "...yeah." I said as I was walking into his arms. He wrapped his arms around me, rocking me a bit.

"He loves you, you know that, he's do anything to have you right now." Eddie reassured me. I looked up at him with big doe eyes and furrowed my brows.

"You would too...." Eddie was Eddie again, he was no longer Richie, I liked him this way, the way his striped dirt went okay with his plain pants, I liked how much curlier his hair got but how he'd cut it so he could be nearer looking.

He looked at me then paused, his breathing stopped and his hands became shaky on my back, "I know, and it sucks, not because I can't have you or that you fell for my best friend, but because I think I'll always be this way. In the back of my mind you'll always be my first love."

"This of it this way, in some crazy, nutso alternate reality— you aren't Eddie the hypochondriac, or the germaphobe, you're the love of my life and we can have anything we'd like in a big house and do anything we want. Anything is possible when you're a King." He smiled and kissed my forehead.

"Richie better not mess things up with you, or I swear I'll steal his girl." I stuffed my face in his neck. He smelled of clean fruit, almost like it was subtle or fake, not so citrusy or sweet as it should, but nice cause it didn't make my allergies run wild.

"When did you become a man, Eddie Spaghetti?" He shrugged and chuckled.

"I don't know, but I'm digging it." He said just as the doorbell rang. Who uses the doorbell?

I walked over to the door with Eddie behind me. When I opened the big door I saw a jittery looking Richie freeze all together. My chest rose and fell vigorously, a slight panic rising in my brain like an annoying knocking at the door.

"Hey, Eddie." Richie said almost awkwardly, he's never been awkward around Eddie before.

"Hi, Rich," the boy said from behind me, he then sucked in a sharp breath and ruffled my hair, making ringlets fall to shape my face, "I'll call you later, yeah?"

I nodded at him as he opened the screen door and left, slipping past Richie with a small smile and nod. I looked back at Richie who slipped in as he left. I closed the big door and watched as the already dark sky began to drizzle very lightly.

"Hey, gorgeous," He said, "look, I talked to my mom-"

"You yelled at her, my mom told me." I said shyly, I wasn't really dressed, clad in short shorts and a short- sleeved. I heard Eddie's car pull out of my driveway.

"Yeah, and listen, I don care what anyone, especially her, say. I wanna be with you, I-I'm in love with you, no doubt about it, babe. Me and you, yeah?" I sighed as he spoke.

"Richie that's your mom, she still helped raise you. Wouldn't you want her at the wedding?" I'm so bad at this whole 'adulting' thing.

"There wouldn't be a wedding because of her. I've tried to make her happy and I just can't, so I moved onto you, you are the only woman I want to make happy for the rest of my life." He got closer to me, I sighed at our close proximity, my nerves were making me nauseous.

"Maybe we weren't meant to be, the most tragic of love stories? It would look bad for us anyways." I shrugged, I needed any type of excuse, I just, she hates me.

"What do you mean, why do you think that?" I sighed and rested my head on his chest, he cradled my head in his one large hand and rubbed my ear.

"We look like we shouldn't even know the other's name. Haven't you ever noticed the strange stares we get?" He kissed the top of my head.

"So what, the only thing I ever notice is how you get prettier everyday. These people no nothing about us. I know you don't care about that, anyways." I sighed as he could see through me.

"I just, I try so hard, I'm tired of it." Maybe that wasn't the best thing to say.

"I try hard too, baby, I work extra hard, I support you in school, outside of school and even in your terrible decisions." He said, I felt a little attacked, like he made this seem like we were in some one-sided relationship.

"I'm trying, Rich, you don't think life is hard for me? I'm black, a woman, and still in college trying to make something of myself. Literally everyone ever has told me 'no', and I don't need that. I chose Stanford for you, I could've went to NYU like my mom kept telling me. She said 'long distance is hard, but it'll be okay' we'll I didn't want to take the hard way I made a short cut for you." When did we get so far apart?

"I never asked you to, you know what, I've made sacrifices to. It seems like I'm always the one coming here, you never apologize first, you never made the distance to be a romantic and travel in the rain to willingly apologize just to see each other, well I'm done traveling in the rain, I could get sick, ya know." He stormed out, I was left by myself in a pool of my own insanity and regrets.

High school never ends.

Arrchie cane and chewed at my socks, "momma and poppa are just having a slight disagreement, we're gonna be okay." I said scratching behind his fluffy ear.

I put on my shoes and walked right outside. I walked with my head held high and my stomach churning. I walked the familiar pattern to the Tozier household. I walked right up onto their porch, to the house where I got my first boyfriend, almost lost him, and will keep him forever.

I looked through the window and saw a soaked Richie yelling and screaming. The window pane and my glasses were both rain-drizzled. I was not dressed for this weather.

"You were right, mom." Richie said as he paced around. He mom tried to settle him, but this is Richie we're talking about.

"No, hun, I-" Richie interrupted his mother once more. He tugged at his hair which curled up and hung low from the weight of the water.

"No, I've always made the effort, I've tried the most and of course I love her I just can't keep traveling in freezing rain." Sad to say that he was right, I couldn't even be mad at him for it.

I opened the door and shut it harshly behind me they turned to look at me, Richard in shock, "then don't." I said moving my arms up a bit.

"Arriet-" He began but I hushed him by charging right at him whilst saying, "Shut it, Trashmouth." I kissed him, well, that turned into a make out. Yeah, so I stuck my tongue down my boyfriend's throat in front of his parents to prove a point.

We basically ate each other's faces off in his living room, and that's fine.

Finished: Monday, May 21, 2018. 9:13 pm.

Published m: Monday, May 21, 2018, 9:14 pm.