Eteled: Shouldn't you be sleeping?

Sam: I should be a lot of things, but I live to disappoint.

———

Texting

Sam: What is life

Sam: What is the meaning

Sam: Why are we here

Sam: Ok pasta is ready

Kyle: Existence is pain

Kyle: OOH PASTA

———

Sam: *drinking Pepsi*

Eteled: You know you could die if you keep drinking that, right?

Sam: Wait, really?

Eteled: Yeah.

Sam: *chugs the rest of it*

———

Austin: Do you want to die?

Sam: Yes.

Kyle: It's kind of a given here

———

Elly: *to Mr Brenner* Say what you want about us, but at least we don't lick our fingers every time we turn a page.

Sam: I don't even have to because they're constantly sweaty from the stress of being alive.