Mmm yes, a cast of perfectly beautiful people to play the roles of your quirky, relatable girl and a hot male model who'd vomit at the sight of your story to play her sexy borderline abusive boyfriend!

Can't forget the side characters who have face claims despite barely being rememberable characters in the story. Although the main characters probably aren't very memorable either so who am I shitting? You, I'm shitting on you for your poor choices.

Inserting pictures off the internet of random people or celebrities into your story and slapping your characters' names underneath, otherwise commonly known as a "cast", is a classic Wattpadder tactic and a Wattpadder tactic only. Many times it's for those who don't know diddly squat about writing a description or simply for those who are too lazy to be an actual writer and... write.

Now, most writers, even outside of wattpad have "face claims" for their characters. But for me and others that I've known and read about, those people still aren't treated as the actual character, they just look similar enough to them and are used for inspiration.

Inserting gifs and images of actors and treating them like they're your characters and using them as crutches to skate out of descriptions is a bit different. I also know many writers just like to add them for extra visuals to help readers, as long as you're not using them in place of actual writing, I don't really mind, I'm mostly talking about the lazy bastards here.

Adding a picture of Stephen James every time you mention him smirking and inserting pics of Pinterest outfit ideas in the middle of your chapter aren't replacements for writing descriptions you slothful thot. What are we? Sitting on grandma's sofa listening to storytimes as she flips through that dusty old scrapbook of family pictures you don't care about? No, this is supposed to be a book with a detailed storyline, act like it.

Read an actually normal written novel and take some notes on how they create character imagery with just words. (Or stay tuned to this rant, you should do both.)

BuT tHIs iS wAtTpAd, iT dOeSn'T mAtTeR!!!! Do you know what Wattpad is for? Reading and writing yes? What part of turning your novel into a lazy, low-quality JPEG picture book is writing again?

But maybe you don't have casts, maybe you write character info charts. Or maybe you're one of the people who does both *shivers in disgust*.

Exhibit A:

Thank you, thank you for telling me every single thing about the characters before I even meet them and spoiling it. I totally needed to know Lucas Reed's height before I even know him even though he's a 7-year-old with no importance to the story at all. Have you ever read a physical, professionally written book that had a character info chapter before the book starts? No, probably not right? I wonder why...

What's a book if you don't describe shit? Oh, it's a fucking Wikipedia article of documented information with a shit stain of conflict thrown in. Do you know how interesting it can be for readers to learn little bits and pieces of a character and not just learn it all at once before they even read the damn book? Clearly not, dunno why I asked.

In some cases, I can get character charts. But for regular books, they are utterly pointless aside from serving as a massive spoiler and being lazy and you can't tell me otherwise.

Describing characters, especially reoccurring ones, is critical to any book. Using character charts and images to do that job isn't as fulfilling as learning it as you go. Remember, you don't need to, and shouldn't learn everything about a character in one swoop either. You're also skipping out on great opportunities to flex your skills and write some poetic, beautiful description that's bound to swoon people left and right.

bUt I sUcK aT dEsCrIpTiOnS, thAt's WhY i uSe CaSts aNd cHaRtS! Don't we all? I mean, nobody is good at descriptions until they really start trying and learning. Descriptions are tough tits, especially when it comes to making them your own style.

I'm no expert or teacher, but it's time to school you bitches once again.

Writing "She had green eyes and brunette hair" is fine for a random character, but a character of importance needs more than just a told line of information.

Look up synonyms for words. Don't just use basic words all the time like the basic bitch of a writer you currently are, go for something a little bit different. Pop open a Google tab and search up a word to find synonyms. And remember to read the definitions for the synonyms you use before you use a word that's similar but has a second meaning you didn't know about.

(Don't use words that are so uncommon the average reader won't understand them or that don't flow with the sentence well, read that shit out loud. Reading out loud tells you everything, your story's tone, if it's awkward or chunky, if you have any errors, if your sentences need variation, the list goes on.)

The same goes for the descriptive adjectives. Fuck saying "He had brown eyes" say something like "He had mahogany eyes like stained glass, tinting the windows to his soul". I also added more to it than just saying he had mahogany eyes. Sometimes you gotta add more beef to descriptions.

It reads more poetic and flows less choppy than saying "he had mahogany eyes" and just telling the reader. Using comparisons, like I did comparing eyes to stained glass, is a useful tactic too. It also helps to add details about the character's personality and expression, regrowing two brain cells with one effort. Saying his dark eyes tint the windows to his soul implies he's probably not sweet and bubbly, it implies that maybe he's hiding something, that he's probably more on the cold and antisocial side of the spectrum.

Avoid cliches. "Her ocean blue orbs were easy to get lost in", "The fiery redhead", "He was sculpted like a Greek god", "His chiseled jawline", "speckles of green were in her eyes", are some of the most overused description lines out there. If you've read a description before, don't fucking reuse it for god's sake. What's with calling eyes "orbs" now anyway? Do you have orbies for eyes or something? 

Rephrase the basics. Write out a basic description first, then in a single column line rewrite that description at least two or three more times with different wording. And from there, decide which one sounds best. This method is also good for people who are fine at descriptions but can't decide how to word things and end up writing then erasing repeatedly. Compare and contrast.

"He looked out the window with a cup of coffee, thinking about the meaning of this world. The thoughts brought him to anger." is the base description. It's not bad and it would work fine in many cases actually given the last point we'll touch on. But there's still room to add more.

1. "His hazel eyes gazed out the window of his apartment at the city lights filling the early morning atmosphere below him. Combing a hand through his short greying hair, Noah pondered on the true meaning of this world. Tight, downturned lips and knitted brows decorated his aged features. He took a sip from his coffee mug. The bitter, caffeinated liquid fueled his vexed mind rather negatively." 

2. "Noah stared into dawn's horizon outside of his apartment's floor to ceiling window with a disgruntled expression. The meaning of this world sat heavily on his sleep-deprived mind; troubling his thoughts. He clinched the mug in his hand with a white-knuckled grip. The burn from the fresh, hot coffee fueled his internal rage further."

When writing these, I added some other details. Like I mentioned earlier, weaving details into your descriptions helps set the scene and can reveal things about the character.

Don't over-describe. Despite the tips I've given, I cannot stress enough that you should never over-describe. Not everything needs a long description or any description period. Not every description needs fancy words or spicy information either. You bore your readers, readers are not there to read an entire paragraph describing the love interest's apartment and the lovely paintings on the walls, or every single detail about the main character's friend that only appears for two chapters, they're there to read the storyline. 

Longer descriptions can also dramatically affect your story's flow and sentence structure. Varying between longer sentences of description and shorter sentences of information is key for good balance.

Descriptions can also depend on the character. For example, if your character is a moody asshole who can't be bothered to care about anything, they'd probably describe things with more negative remarks and usually with shorter, blunt sentences. If the character is a quiet type who hangs back, they'd probably pay closer attention to the people around them and note the little details. Make them describe things in a way that matches their personality, especially if you're writing multiple POVs. Adding those personal touches to differentiate their personalities can work wonders.

And please, never ever begin the first chapter of a book with just describing something random. I have a whole rant on hooks if you haven't read it, but to sum it up, if you don't know how to begin the first chapter in a way that's interesting, kick things off with action. Action is always a safe bet that'll draw a reader's attention.

There are also programs like the Wordtune browser extension that can suggest rephrases for your writing. While this can be helpful on occasion or when you just cannot think of something, don't rely on it too much, you still need to work on your skills yourself.

Of course, there's also plenty of writer's blogs that go into way more description about description than I did here. So if you're serious about improving, don't just take the bullshit I spew, go get advice from professionals too.