Sorry bout me dropping off the face of the Earth there for a second ;)
_________

Point of View: Virgil, First Person
Timeline: Present Day

I shut Roman's door gently as I could, not wanting to accidentally wake him and be forced to explain my sudden absence.

And then I stormed down the hallway.

Thankfully I didn't run into any other sides between Roman's room and the Commons, because I was definitely a force to be reckoned with at that particular time.

I burst into the Commons to find Logan sitting on the couch - reading some thick book with writing in it with a thin black marker - and Patton, lying on the floor watching some YouTube video on his laptop.

Patton blanched immediately at the look in my eyes and sat up, catching Logan's attention.  Logan's eyes flickered nervously across the room.

I didn't say anything right away, crossing my arms.  They already knew what was coming at them.

Logan slowly closed his book, setting it gently on the arm of the couch and Patton closed his laptop and set it down on the table, still facing me.  Both of them looked ashamed and with pity in their eyes and it was only then when I realized I was crying.

No, I'm - I'm mad at them! I'm - This is me being angry! UGh...

Patton stood up and grabbed held out a box of tissues to me, nervously.  After a moment, I snatched them away from him.  "This does not mean anything," I spat out, turning around quickly, drying my eyes.

Patton and Logan were smart enough to keep their mouths shut in return, not saying anything while I composed myself.

Once I had finished, I let them have it.

"Would either of you like to explain, the reason to find out my boyfriend had - had this COMPLEX that BOTH of you knew about and NEITHER of you felt inclined to tell me?  Something that not only endangered Roman, but THOMAS.  I'd really like to hear this one," I said bitterly, doing my best not to start crying again.

Logan shifted nervously. "I certainly understand why you are not happy with us, Anxiety," Logan started.  "But Roman wished for us not to tell you and we thought it best to abide to his wishes.  It was simply not our secret to tell, nor our place to tell you."

"Not your secret to tell?" I repeated.  "Not your secret to TELL?  Not your PLACE? Tell me Logan - when exactly would it have been your secret to tell?"

Logan looked at his shoes, not even bothering to argue against me.  "When, Logan? When Roman was DEAD? When Thomas started being affected?  When? WHEN?"

"I think you're being a little hard on him, Anxiety," Patton said quietly, stepping towards me.  " I mean... after all, who were we to tell him not to fall in love?"

"Roman falling in love is not the issue here," I snapped.  "This is not is fault, he didn't ask for this.  The issue is that I clearly wasn't aware of the dangers of Roman getting his heart broken and either of you THOUGHT IT WAS OKAY NOT TO TELL ME."

"Okay is not giving us very much credit," Logan interrupted, frowning. "Neither of us thought it was okay.  Nothing about ANY of this is okay."

"Then why didn't you say something?" I whispered. "So fine - Roman should've told me," I admitted. "But when he didn't... so you should have stepped in. Y-You should have told me. You should have warned me that this could happen."

Patton stepped in, once again. "Kiddo, ya know... we wanted to tell you-"

"Thomas's protection goes above anything else," I restated, voice dark and serious.  "Above Roman's... complex too. Not telling me not only put Roman in danger, but everyone."

"You're looking for someone to blame," Patton said softly, realizing what this was really about.

I didn't say anything, eyes flicking downwards momentarily giving him the only answer he needed.

"Aww kiddo... ya know that none of this is - is your fault... right?"

I dropped my head at the words. "H-How did I not know?" I whispered, wrapping my arms around myself tightly.  "H-How could I not know about something so serious? Looking back, it was so obvious.  H-How did I not realize how much I was hurting him..."

"Oh, kiddo," Patton said, pulling me into his embrace and in his arms I sobbed freely.

"I almost lost him."

"We all almost lost him, kiddo."

"I was s-so scared for him."

"We all were scared for him, kiddo."

"I never want that to happen to him again."

Patton pulled back slightly at that - frowning, finally sensing where I was going with this.

Logan frowned too, but at Patton's silence, not my words. "Anxiety... would you enlighten me to your intentions, as it seems Morality has already discovered?"

"I can't stay in a relationship with him," I said quietly. "Not when I'd be so scared of breaking his heart every second.  But I can't break up with him either - that would bring us right back t-to that."

Logan frowned. "Then how exactly do you intend on solving this predicament?"

Patton let out a loud sob, tears falling rapidly from his cheeks. He pulled me back into his arms tightly and I choked on my words at his emotion, my voice failing me.

"He's going to get Roman to break up with HIM," Patton sobbed out, holding me tighter.

Logan's eyes widened and he waited for me to deny it.

I didn't.

"Oh Anxiety... I'm so sorry," Logan said softly.

I merely hung my head in response.  I didn't want their pity.

I just wanted my heart back before Roman breaks it.

But honestly...

... my heart was already a casualty in this thing called love.  And there was no getting it back. 

Not anymore.

"Anxiety... are you sure about this?"  Logan asked gently. "There's no shame in changing your mind. I'm certain that we could find another way out of it."

But I was willing to do this. Do this for him.  To save him.

Because I love him.

"You guys won't tell Roman about this, right?" I asked, ignoring Logan's statement entirely. "You owe me that at least."

Patton hung his head, but nodded, holding his glasses in one hand while he rubbed his wet eyes with the other.  I could see that no part of him agreed with me, but he would respect my wishes.

Just like he had Roman's.

Logan pressed a gentle hand on Patton's shoulder, in a small attempt to comfort him. And he gave me a firm nod in return, though his face proved that he too didn't agreed.

At that note, I shrugged my hoodie higher on my shoulders, turning to leave.

"I - I think what you're doing for - for all of us is very commendable, Anxiety," Logan said suddenly. "You have my deepest respect and... and s-should you need my assistance, I-I would be more than willing to provide as much help as I can to make - make this as painless... as it possibly can be."

I merely gave him a tiny nod in response, keeping my head down and using my bangs to hide my watery eyes.  I finally left the two of them behind and stopped as my footsteps reached Roman's door.

This was going to hurt.

A lot.

But if I had to choose between breaking my heart or his...

I would pick mine.

Every.

Single.

Time.

_________________________
Sorry for the long wait - these last two weeks or so have been a bit crazy.  I haven't given up on this story yet!

I intend on finishing this story by New Years (yeah its that close), so as long as I don't have any more unexpected chaos... this book is coming to an end.

Voters:
animegirl81
deziRee314
SoftxRacoon
death-of-a-phangirl
TaelsBias_
Amelia_Divine
Cyndaquil17
SassyCC
Azari_Heere
xJustAGeekx
AuriLW
Lightseed
ImSorryplzforgiveme
B****JerkA**butt666
myfantasyisntyours
SalmaMendez
RachelWantsToWrite
AlexCait
ali6ce (I like ur name)

oMG DO YOU SEE THAT LIST
wOw
YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING :3

I do see every single vote, and there's a couple of people who have been making a lot of headway and I kinda wanna show them off too because some of them have voted on almost every single chapter and I wanna show my thanks, even if they aren't at this point in the story yet :3

Artemis5212
SheDaGecko23
ScarletValkrum
topp_klass_trash

And there might be a few others making their way, but these were the biggest names I saw for right now :)

Hope you had Happy Holidays!

- Max :)

i'm not getting notifications for some reason so sorry if I miss comments - I thought my phone was a little too quiet but there was nothing when I checked. then i looked into the actual chapter and there was a bunch of comments for some reason. idk. kay i'm done byeee