I am sorry for the messed up grammar.

Anyways. I really enjoyed writing this chapter. But we'll have a little bit of angst aka. 'eating disorder' at this point Val is just gonna be Charlie Spring 2.0 with his looks and problems 😔. (I cried during Heartstopper). This will be the same day as Jayden'POV just that Val might be a little fruity and Antonia just trying to be a good friend. This will also be longer than Jayden's chapter just because I took my time with this one. I am sorry I switched the writing style mid way. I realized it to late to change it.

The scene with Rio and Toni hugging about the crush thing happened to me ✌️. My friends crush liked me so I was scared it might ruin our friendship. We cried together.

+ writer projecting onto Rio with the reading and guitar playing and the escape of reality 😞.

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I lay in bed thinking about all the things that could go wrong on the first day of school. Before I manage fall asleep for at least some time my alarm goes off. Great...

I feel like I have no energy inside my body to move around even though I end up turning around anyways.

I sigh as I lay in bed for a few more minutes before getting up. I walk towards my window opening the curtains. I see the sun rising behind the houses of my neighborhood. The younger kids are already playing on the street... don't they have school? At that moment I see one of their parents telling them to get inside the car.

I walk away as I take my clothes walking inside my bathroom. After changing and brushing my teeth I walk downstairs seeing my father in the kitchen while my mom sits on the dining table.

"Good morning Rio! I made you breakfast." My father says as he sees me while my mom just ignores me and sips on her coffee. My dad has been trying to be more there for me after he got the call from the principal last year. While he tries to understand why I got into a fight mom just said she was very disappointed . Which is nothing new.

"No thanks I'll eat at school." I say as the doorbell rings. "Can you get it please? It is probably Toni." "Yeah dad." I say as I walk to the door opening it. Just like expected Toni walks in. "Hey mr and mrs Marino!" She greeted my parents. My dad smiled at her while my mom just nodded.

"What the heck are you wearing Rio?" She said looking at me judging. "A jeans with a shirt what else?" "Where did your taste go... it's because of your little crush isn't it. Rio sweetie you'll get changed right now." I knew that look on her face so I didn't even bother to protest.

She ended up giving me my crop top... great just what I needed. I mean it ironically if you can't tell. I walk inside the bathroom as I change. The crop top makes my stomach way to visible. But I mean it doesn't look that bad?

I walk outside the bathroom where Toni stands. "Rio if I would feel any attraction towards anyone it would be towards you. Because I would've probably be simping. At least loud the current beauty standards." "Yeah yeah... you say that ever time" she does, at some point I asked her if she might be demisexual but she said that she isn't really sexual or romantic attracted to me she just finds me way to 'handsome' .

After we walk back downstairs i grab my jacket as we walk out of my house.

"So... did you eat yet?" She asks a bit worried. She's been acting like that ever since she caught me throwing up in a bathroom. The fact that I never ate around her since a couple months didn't help my case. But it's my problem. I'll just lie for now and later I'll go to the bathroom after lunch. She can't follow me there so she won't notice. I usually prefer not eating anything. That way I don't feel nauseous and weak after throwing up and I don't waste the food.

"Yeah I eat cereal." I lie straight in her face. I do feel bad but she'll just tell me to finally get help. It's nothing new.

"If you say so... but you will eat at least something at lunch understood mr." She said raising an eyebrow at me. "Yes ma'am" I chuckle. I feel a bit sick in my stomach while lying to her. It feels wrong.

As we walk through the school gate Toni seems to remember something. "Oh dammit, I totally forgot about it!" "About what?" "I borrowed something from Judie over the holidays. I said I'll return it today! I'll see you on our usual spot in ten minutes I'll be quick!" She said as she started running.

I just walk to our usual spot while walking past the other students. From afar I see Jayden and Oliver. It's kinda weird how we just started talking last year even though we've known each other for what? 5 years now? It doesn't matter. After Jayden and Oliver stood up for me last year when my friends weren't around. I still don't know if they just felt bad that it was 4 against 1 or because of something else. Since then I couldn't stop thinking about Jayden... which is weird because if it was about that incident only I would've fallen for Oliver right? Yeah... no.

Who gave HIM the right to smile at me like that. It felt like my gay awakening all over again. Well bi awakening to be correct. I mean Shego from Kim possible and Cardan from 'the cruel prince' were my bi awakenings... (they were mine 😋) don't judge me for it.

(Different writing from now on (italics are over ))

Anyways as I stood there looking a bit more at Jayden Jason approached me. "Hey Rio! Looking good today." He said looking me up and down while I gave him a glare. He always flirted with me since he found out I was bi.

"Right personal space..." He smiled awkwardly before starting a normal conversation. A few minutes later Toni came running towards us. As soon as she reached us she started jumping up and down excitedly. "GUEES WHAT!!???" She basically screamed in my ear. "Oh hey Jason. Could you please leave." She said with her most neutral face. Jason did as told waving at me before leaving.

I looked at Toni raising an eye brown. "Judie is now of officially going by they/them pronounce." She said giggling. I felt a bit surprised. Judie has been thinking about their gender identity for a while now. I guess they figured it out now. "Why are you so happy about it?" I asked. "Well...you see I had this bet going on with Nelson. And Judie has been thinking about it anyway I am just happy they figured it out." At this point almost everyone I know is queer expected for my crush.... Great. Just my luck.

As I think that I feel someone's eyes on me. As I look around my eyes meet Jayden's. I don't even know how I could get lost in his eyes... They were so... pretty. Usually people say brown eyes are average but his just feel different...His eyes are amber colored I would say. I am not completely sure. He seems to have cut his blond hair in the holidays because it was way shorter than before. His freckles also seem to have faded a bit.

As I kept looking in his eyes he looked away. His gaze now resting on Toni. I felt a bit disappointed at the fact he stooped looking at me. As he looked back at Oliver I turned my gaze back to Toni. Who looked amused. "Done falling deeper for now?" I sigh at her comment as the bell rings. "What class do you have now?" I ask her "Biology and you?" "Me too. Thank good we share at least some classes."

We walk to the biology room. Ms Watson was already there as we took our seats. The biology class was boring but what else is to be expected.

At lunch we sit down as I pull out my book. "Reading again?" I just nod. After a few minutes I still didn't touch my food. Which caused Toni to take away my book forcing me to eat something. I'll just throw it up later.

As I look around I see Oliver and Jayden. "They stand there as if ordered and not picked up." I murmured which caused Toni to laugh. She stands up and yells through the cafeteria. "Over here! You two can sit with us!" She waves energetic. I quickly stand up trying to pull her down. This is kind of embarrassing since everyone is looking at us. I looked at them. Jayden giving us or rather Toni a slight smile which made my heart flutter and break at the same time.

"Thanks" Jayden said as soon as they got here. "No problem. Rio realized that you two were standing there as if you were ordered and not picked up." Toni said. Which is embarrassing. What if they think I am making fun of them or something like that. "Tori!" I whisper and yell at the same time. I hope the others don't hear me.

"And that means what exactly?" Oliver asked. "It's an English version of something Europeans say or more precisely my dad keeps saying it after our trip." I respond feeling a bit embarrassed over the fact that my accent is very clear while I say so. Usually I don't mind my accent but in front of Jayden... I drift into my thoughts as I suddenly snap out of it when Toni says that Jayden also has art.

"I have art with Mrs. Müller and you?" I say quickly trying to seem as if I was paying attention which I clearly did not. But they didn't need to know that.

I

End up having a little conversation with Jayden. I forgot half of it again because he smiled during it... I am down bad aren't I?

After lunch we walk together to art class which would normally be a good thing but I still felt nauseous. We sat next to each other. During the lesson I ask Mrs. Müller if I may use the bathroom.

I ended up throwing up my lunch... again.

As I walk out of the stall to clean myself up a guy walks past me looking me up and down. "You should get checked. It would be a waste if you ended up collapsing someday because you don't eat. It would be a waste for such a pretty boy." He said as he walked out of the bathroom leaving me confused.

I didn't get a good enough look at him but he had ginger hair and blue eyes I think? Doesn't really matter I've never seen him around before. Maybe he's new? I'll just ask Toni later if we have some new students.

After cleaning myself up I walk back to class. When I enter the room Mrs. Müller looks at me a bit worried. She ends up saying nothing as I walk back to Jayden. At the end of the lesson I look at my canvas a bit unsatisfied. Something is missing...

Jayden looks at my painting which makes me feel a bit excited for his reaction? I am also scared... When I looked at his face he looked shocked. Before I could say something Mrs. Müller walked over to us. "Well Jayden you didn't get that far I assume but what's on it is good as far as I can see." She said. I looked over at his painting. He drew a cherry blossom in a field which I think looked amazing but I could tell he thought different.

"Valerio! You're almost done?" I looked at my painting as she asked me. I guess almost... "Well the details are missing..." I decided to say. Mrs. Müller tells us we'll see next time and that we should leave.

Jayden and I walked out of the room. Toni and Oli already stood there. And yes from now on I'll call him Oli. He said it was alright in return he can call me Rio.

We ended up parting ways at the school gates with me and Toni walking home.

"So are you staying over for a while?" I ask her. "Of course sweetheart we got to talk about your little love life." She said a bit teasingly.

"Oh please. Your love life is worse than Max's grades." Max is failing all his classes. "I am aromatic?" "Exactly darling." I responded while already starting to run laughing. We talked like that with each other every time we're alone. I guess it's just our way of showing our friendship? It doesn't matter I wouldn't change anything about it. I am glad I have her as best friend and sister figure.

We ran until we're at my house. I get my keys out as I open the door. My parents left for work so we just went up to my room after grabbing something for her to eat. We jump onto my couch as we put on my TV. We rewatched Friday the 13th.

At the end of the movie we just lay there as she starts to talk. "So... are you gonna do something about that little crush of yours?" "Of course not. He likes you. Everyone knows that..." I look her in the face as I see that her expression sadness. "You do know that it's not my fault right?" Her voice seemed to be unsure. I look shocked at her. "Of course. Why wouldn't I? I might like him but we're not together. Besides you'll always be one of the most important people in my life." I say as I pull her into a hug.

We sat like that for a while before pulling away from each other. I gave her a small smile that she returns. "Oh! I forgot something... I meet a guy in the bathroom that I haven't seen before with ginger hair. Do you know something about him?" I ruined the mood. I know. "Way to ruin our emotional moment. But no? I can ask around though tomorrow." Toni of course doesn't fail to let me know.

Later when Toni leaves I decide to play a bit the guitar. My mom decided to give me a teacher when I was younger. Now I rarely play but recently it's my second best escape from reality along with reading. It's as if I am in another world that is calm and collected.

I play for about one hour when I hear my dad's car pull up in the drive way. I quickly put the guitar away to go downstairs so I can greet him.

"Hey dad. How was work?" I ask while he handed me his coat which I put away. "Exhausting. But not to much that we can't spend time together while your mom is still away. How about we watch a movie?" He asked surprising me. Usually he's moody when he comes home... He actually holds his promise this time. I smile to myself.

"Sure you pick one. I'll get popcorn." I say. "Just like the old times..." he sighs. "I've been missing quite a lot." Yeah you did... but not as much as mom.

"...You know. I am your father. You can tell me anything that bothers you." He says as he looks at the kitchen counter where one plate stood. "I assume Antonia was here?" "Yeah..." "She's always welcome, if she's there for you." He whispers the last part barely audible.

As we sat down in the living room he puts on some comedy movie. We end up laughing together again until 2 hours later. "You should get to bed now mio figlio (my son)" he says smiling at me.

As I walk up the stairs I first walk into the bathroom getting ready to bed. When I am done I hear yelling downstairs. It are my parents.

(This writing will be for Rio's mom and this one for his dad)

"Look Batheny I just think it would be better if you started treating him more like your child instead of mine. Be there for your kid. I didn't agree to marry you after my brother left you just so you can neglect being a mother!"

"But you're doing such a good job. Francesco loves you like his dad."

"His name is Valerio. You don't even know your child's name! I will take care of him but it's because I care about him as if he was my own unlike you. You're barely even here!"

"If that's what you want get yourself some house wife. We are not a family! And that boy is not my responsibility he's the responsibility of your family! Your brother left when he found out I was pregnant!"

"If that's so then why are you still here?!"

"I am his mother."

"Then start acting like one."

"Just leave if you aren't satisfied."

"I won't leave you will. He's my responsibility remember. We'll get an official divorce. This was the last time I wanted to give you a chance to be a mother for Rio but you can't. I have enough proof to get custody over Rio. On the documents you signed me in as his bio father at his birth. It should be enough and if not I'll sue your for the things you did. By tomorrow you are out of my house. I hope you at least manage to say goodbye to your child properly."

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I sat besides my bed crying. I don't even know the specific reason. Was it because of their fight ? Maybe a bit. Was it because my dad isn't my dad? More likely.

As I sat there crying I heard more yelling and things being thrown as I cover my ears to blend it out. The yelling is because of me...

It's my fault

I keep telling myself that even though I know it's not the case.

When I hear footsteps walking up the stairs I quickly act as if I was asleep. My dad walks in looking at me. I feel him walking towards me as he kisses my forehead. "I am sorry that you needed to find out this way. We'll talk tomorrow after school how does that sound? Sleep well."

That night I cry myself to sleep.

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Thank you for reading! I'll swear the next chapter will be Norte happy 😊 (The four of them hanging out outside of school) but the next Rio chapter will be about him and his dad talking and clearing things :)

I hope at least some of y'all cried I did ✌️😭 (especially during the times I put my issues onto Rio 😔 I am sorry)

Ps. Feli