THINGS YOU DO FOR ALLIES

Finding weapons was a lot harder than it sounded. Cassie had to scrounge for pieces of shrapnel, see which ones had any potential to have a handle and still be able to stab something. If she couldn't, she might just have to wrap something around it to act as a handle.

Jay stayed at her side. He had started looking with her but when she snapped at him when he kept picking up useless pieces, he crossed his legs on the floor and chatted aimlessly. The constant chatter made her want to get some poison sumac to see if it would get him to be quiet for one moment. All of the words melded together so she couldn't decipher what he was saying; something she considered a blessing. That way she could ignore it easier.

An unsettling quiet settled amongst the two. Cassie blinked, wondering if she'd truly perfected the art of ignoring him that she'd completely blocked out the words. A flight glance in his direction stopped her search entirely. His mouth was closed, his eye's glazed and he was playing with his hands. She recognised this too well - it was something she'd often do to stop herself from breaking down.

Wiping her hands on her pants she wandered over to Jay. She had to dance her way over, being careful not to trip over any random pieces of shrapnel that could impale her. It was clumsy and she nearly slipped a few times but it did the trick. She stood before Jay, waiting for his gaze to lift up.

It never did.

Sighing she tapped his shoulder, forcing him to look up at her. She let a small smile grace her lips, nodding to the place next to him. "Is that seat taken?"

He shook his head, moving over so that she had more room to sit. She fell with a sigh, enjoying the relief it gave her legs.

"I thought you were looking for a weapon?"

Cassie shrugged, "I did. There's fuck all there. And honestly, between us, I couldn't be arsed standing up any longer." Not even a flicker of amusement, or of his usual smile. "Come on kid, lighten up! I'm not good at this whole comforting thing, so please just smile so I don't have to make a tit of myself."

"How can I smile when everyone I've ever loved will die on the Ark?" He exclaimed, his hand fiddling increasing with speed.

"You found out, huh?" She didn't know why she was asking, the answer was obvious. Still she continued to search for the words to use to console him. He'd helped her, it was only fair that she'd help him. "Do you honestly think that they could survive down here?"

Jay frowned at her.

"If your family is anything like mine, you'll know the answer to that question. It's a big fat ass no. My parents weren't built to be brutal, hell my dad is paralysed so he definitely wouldn't be able to make it in the survival of the fittest. From what we've seen, death here drags. It'll probably be better for them to die up there. It'd be less painful that's for sure." Cassie knew by the end she was lying; she couldn't admit that.

"But I want to see my parents, Luke, again." She wasn't sure how he was able to see through the thick layer of tears covering his eyes. His hands kept interlacing with one another and separating again, like two lovers in a passionate dance. Jay's lip wobbled slightly; he bit down on it. It still trembled. Cassie had to tear her gaze away, focusing on the trees straight ahead.

"Me too Jabber Jay, me too." Cassie whispered, her low voice almost being lost in the constant hum of noise surrounding them. "But the truth is, I don't particularly want to see them die either, or have to hold their dead body or-" she had to swallow a few times, her throat not getting any clearer. Eventually she managed to squeeze the words out in a shaky voice. "I don't want to bury their grave."

Cassie kept staring at one tree to prevent the tears from falling. The bark was a deep brown that was almost the exact same colour of her eyes, and was riddled with cracks. Leaves flourished off of the branches, reaching downwards to greet the unexpected guests. Leaves that were green - her dad's favourite colour. Immediately she turned her attention from it. She mustered the courage to look at Jay again, not sure what to do if she saw that glassy look in his eyes again. All she saw was Jay staring at her, mouth agape.

"What?" Cassie frowned.

He brought his blue eyes to hers, a tiny smile blooming on his face. "You really aren't what I expected."

She didn't expect the laugh to escape her to be so loud, or so full of light. Neither did Jay, his body jolting slightly at the sudden sound. Smirking and still laughing, she raised an eyebrow in his direction. "Is that a good thing?"

"Very." He smiled again, his happiness infectious. She soon found a warm feeling enveloping her, her body feeling lighter than it had in a long time. All of the horrors that she'd seen on the ground so far had been erased from her memory. Cassie felt like what every teenage girl should feel: joy.

As hard as she tried, she couldn't win the battle against her mouth. Her wide closed mouth smile opened, exposing all of her teeth, showcasing a chipped front tooth and their yellowing shade. Yet she carried on smiling.

"Give me a moment," Cassie rushed off before Jay could say another word, and he was left alone with his thoughts again. She hopped over piles of debris, eyes scouring for a certain piece that had caught her attention before Jay got upset. Panic invaded her, the shrapnel not being there. Her palms began sweating profusely - they needed this weapon. Her heart rate sky rocketed as she continued her desperate quest to find it when there it was, a few feet away from where it had been, as though it might have been kicked by a passer by. With holding the urge to scream for happiness, she swiped up the piece. The sunlight glistened off of the metal, with a jagged end with made Cassie involuntarily shiver and a surprisingly smooth one. She still planned on making a handle for it somehow.

Satisfied with her find, she jogged back over to Jay, for once being the one to start talking. "I figured that you may need to protect yourself down here, so..." She didn't know what else to say. Instead, she shoved the shrapnel in Jay's direction. "Here."

"This is for me?" Jay plucked the shrapnel from her fingers when Cassie nodded, taking in the shear power held within it. His eyes moved from the makeshift knife in his hand to Cassie who was biting softly on her lip. "Thank you, really, but surely you're better off with it?"

He offered the knife back out to her. She stared at it for a solid minute, shuffling on her feet. Eventually she shook her head, pressing back in his direction. "Jay, they don't call me Callous Cassie for nothing. I can protect myself. Besides," she shrugged, "There has to be at least one more weapon we can get out of that mass of crap that I can use."

Jay nodded, reluctantly slipping it into his pocket. A distant smile graced his face, and even though he was looking right at Cassie, she was sure that he was seeing through her - or seeing someone else entirely. "You remind me a lot of Luke." Cassie cocked her head to the side, letting her actions speak for her. "He's a, uh, close friend of mine. He's selfless, and believes that he's invincible too."

Cassie laughed darkly. "Trust me, Jay, I'm anything but selfless. I pick out people to be friends with because at one point they'll give me an advantage, and do things to get people to trust me so if things do go to shit, I have someone at my back."

He's silent for a while. Cassie glanced his way a few times.

When Jay finally spoke, the sudden sound felt like an attack on her ears. "Then why are you friends with me?"

"Because you didn't give me any other choice," she swivelled her head towards him, her voice dripping with venom. "And we're not friends. Allie's is better fitting."

"Have you ever had any friends?"

She blinked. "I guess I had one. She protected me and made me forget the bad things - is that a friend?"

"Yes, that's a friend."

"Well," she sighed heavily, gaze darting to her feet. "It's a shame she's dead then. I would've liked to have told her."

From the corner of her eye, Cassie could see Jay's hand lingering in the air, inching closer as though to touch her. Just as she was sure he was going to place it on her arm he retracted it, pulling it back close to her body. Cassie let her eyes close momentarily, her lips pulled downwards for a fleeting second.

"Do you want me to check if I can do something about your nose? Luke talked me through it when he did it to me. I'm no expert but I could tr-" Cassie cut him off abruptly with a hand slicing through the air as sharp as her words.

"No, thank you." Cassie kept her eyes away from Jay, unsure of what she'd see but not wanting to find out. "I think we should help out at the wall."

She didn't wait for an answer as she stood to her feet, dusted herself off and adjusted the jacket sleeves. Cassie wandered over to the wall, picking up some wood and dragging it to where the others were congregated. Jay immediately followed, rushing to pick up the other end of wood. He grunted, "You're going to pull something."

Cassie chortled, lifting her end of the wood a little higher. "If anyone is going to pull something, it's you."

Jay attempted to laugh; all that came out was a large huff. "The things I do for my fr-allies."

Cassie remained silent. Soon, Jay did too.

-

hey guys! i hope you all have had a good holiday! mine has been pretty wild - i had a nerf gun fight with my family and i dont think ive had more fun in my life. but anyways, hope you enjoyed the chapter! 

see you guys soon!

-thirdwheelchurchill