"DIVORCE GRANTED"
I sighed in relief finally,and looked over to my husband...my ex-husband he saw me with pain and disgust ,I tried to stop the guilty feeling ,which started after seeing him in pain...after all he was my,....no he is my first love and always will be,but I can't sacrifice my self respect for my love...

I came over to my parents for some support.
But they only looked me with pain and shakes their head with disappointment.
"Not you mom and dad,..I wanted you to support my decision."
I thought and took a deep breath and went outside the court.

I was going towards my car,when I saw mom dad coming out of the court still sad,I again took a deep breath and walked towards them and asked them
"Dad ,let's go I had bring my car."

"No we will take cab." ,Mum said.

"Come on mom,please don't be like this,see you're not looking well let me take you both home."
I tried to convince them.

"No",she again said.

"Please dad you tell her,see she is not listening to me."
I tried to convince my dad this time.

"Huh...if you didn't listen to us ,then how you expect us to listen to you."
Dad said and started walking, leaving me there to think.

"Did I took a wrong decision?"

After some days,
I was free but still had that guilty feeling which was nagging me ...I am free but not feeling like being freed I don't know I should be happy...but....I'm not...why???
I sighed and my inner voice answered my questions.

"You know Nisha,you already know the answer,..your happiness is not complete without your parents,you need them and they need you."
I smiled sadly yes my happiness is always incomplete without them...but they are angry with me ,they are not even picking my call ....last I saw them in the court.

I was feeling guilty because of the disappointed look I saw in my parents eyes...I think...I should tell them my point of view clearly again..this time more calmly and they will surely understand and will respect my decision.

However I had told them before but at that time I myself was too mentally disturbed...and maybe they didn't understand my reasoning and explanation.

I took my car keys and drive towards my house,I was hell nervous,I just had one question I my mind.
"What if ...What if they didn't want to listen to me...what will I do then?"

But still,I rang the bell.
Dad opened the door, but when he saw me he started closing the door, but I stopped him.
"Dad please stop...please dad just listen to me..please"I said.

"No go away you are no daughter of mine."
He said.

"Dad please..."
I cried listening to his harsh words.
"Just once listen please.."I again said.

My tears seems to melt his anger a little and he let me enter.

When Mom saw me she got up from the sofa and started going inside without saying anything,but Dad stopped her.
"Honey wait.. don't run now if she want to say something let's listen... okay, we can't be like this."

"No, I don't want to listen anything from her..tell her to go away."
Mom said,still not facing me.

"Honey I know I am too angry with her...but let's just listen to her...okay just stay with me..."Dad said and hold her hand.

And they turned towards me
"Tell us what to you want to say...we have all our ears."

I took deep breath and wiped my tears and started talking
"Mom, dad I know... I know you are angry disappointed with my decision of DIVORCE... but please don't be. I thought you will support my decision I thought that if everyone will left me..you both would be there... standing by my side and telling me...that we are here... but-"
I sighed and continued.

"I don't know what to say...but you know the situation...still you are saying that I should not go for divorce...why??"

"Nisha, you thought we would be happy with your decision... you thought we will support your stupid impulsive decision..huh."
Dad scowled.

"Impulsive, stupid decision...what are you saying mom..it wasn't a impulsive decision." I said shocked with what my mom thinking.

"Yes it was."
This time my dad said.

"Dad you too..you too think that... that."
I choked on my words.

"It was not an impulsive decision ,it was a decision which I have to take because if I haven't took that decision I would have been a false relationship.
A relationship where I always keep fooling self.
It's okay... it happens,.. next time I will be more careful,... I think, I should adjust a little,.. maybe I am wrong..maybe... maybe
I don't want that relationship."

"And you have this thought...after your three years of marriage...huh."
My mom questioned me.
"One year or three year, I didn't took this decision before because of you guys... I always thought of you...what will you think, you will be sad,hurt etc."I said.
"So what happen now Nisha... can't you see we are sad, hurt... we are angry... then why now, why you took this decision now?"
Mom asked angrily.

"Because HE SLAPPED ME... he slapped me."
And I started crying.

"We know and we are with you. We are here for your support... but for one slap you filed for divorce... this was wrong."My dad said.
"Yes... your dad is right... in your three years relationship he never raised his hand... what I am saying he never even raised his voice and that day, he was frustrated..he had just lost a deal... whatever happened was just a mistake and he was continuously saying sorry to you, wasn't he?",my Mom asked.
"Yes he was... but."
My mom cut me off.

"See, it was just a slap and he was guilty, you should have punished him, scolded him... but this decision... I would again say, this decision was impulsive."

"Enough, do you guys are even thinking what are you saying. I can't believe this, Mom and dad please listen carefully.
I don't care if he hasn't raised his voice or hand on me in these years... my complaint is, how dare he raise his hand on me, who give him the right to raise his hand on me? I don't care he was frustrated angry or whatever... he don't have any right and what's this huh...first time slap, first time or hundred times...he can't raise his hand on me."
I was hell angry of their thinking.

They are taking this as a Small matter.

"Mom...if I had not stopped him here he may be start taking me for granted and may be in future he could have become more violent then what you would have done....yaa right then you would have again said... ADJUST BABY
Right?"I said feeling frustrated.

"Every relationship has problems...one of you should have act maturely, you should mend your relationship."

I interrupted her and said,
"If a relationship has to be mended it means it is broken and a broken relationship is as harmful as a suicide."
"And I hate self harm, mom"
I chuckled sadly and continued.
"You know what, it's fine mom and dad...I thought maybe I haven't make you understand my point of view that's why you are angry and not supporting me but i was wrong, you know everything ... clearly... but still you choose to be that person who does what society wants... what will people say matters more to you than your own daughter. It's fine and here I was feeling guilty that I should say sorry to you for not listening to you , sorry for not considering your opinion...huh...yaa here I am admitting I was wrong ,wrong in understanding my own parents."
I said and got up.

"It's okay if you want to be angry be then, you want to be sad be then... it's your choice, but please from now stop worrying about me... because I know what is right for me and what is wrong?
Because..."
I made direct eye contact and said
"Because I have chosen my self respect... I had took decision for my self respect, which in my opinion was the best decision of my life."
I started walking towards the door but before turned towards my mom and dad and said,
"Maybe I am no daughter of yours from now but you both will always be my mom and dad... when one day you will think that your Nisha was right
Just call me... I will always be there...with you."

I said inaudibly,"unlike you..I respect your decision."
"Good bye."
And I walked out.

Suddenly, I was feeling free... free from guilt... free from clutches of my past... free from the society thinking.

"But my parents, maybe one day they will understand but for now Nisha, let's explore yourself."
I said to myself.

Feeling like a free bird, I walked towards my car and suddenly I got the answer of my question which was nagging me from the day of my divorce.
Had I done something wrong?
Did I do something wrong?
Was I wrong?
The answer is NO, a big NO.
I didn't do anything wrong.
I smiled and felt happy with my answer and started my drive... a drive towards a better life and a better future.