Hello... Pardon the sudden intrusion of my bitter voice in your ears, sweetie. I'm sorry. I tried to stop myself. I wanted to have mercy on myself and not degrade my pride. But just now, my yearning killed my pride, ruthlessly. I apologize again... You're still listening to me, aren't you? I just know you are. And I know it you that you won't reply. Say something... Anything... I knew you won't reply and I yet wished for it, against all odds. Don't you have anything to say to me? Is it just me who've been dying to hear the voice of the one I love. I want to hear your voice you know. I want to hear it live instead of repeatedly listening those voice messages. I've listened to them so many times that I remember each word you said. I don't know why but I want you to say things like it was all just a test of my patience, or you were anger at me or something like that. Yeah, I'll be mad for a moment but I'll forgive you the next. I will be so happy that I might stop breathing. But we both know I'm expecting something that will never happen... I won't lie, not anymore. It freaking tore me apart in pieces. My soul withered away that moment. My word's aren't just words, honey. I'm really bleeding insanely from the deep wound you inflicted upon my heart. I doubt if you'll still be able to heal me like before. Guess not. The damage is too deep this time... I still remember the day you asked me that you wanted some space to sort things in your life. I was a fool to agree upon a break in our relationship. I thought it'll be just a couple of days and it'll be back to normal soon. But the small distance you put between us grew wider every day. Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months. The words we spoke to each other during that time appeared so... Shallow... I still regret doing that. It might have been the most heinous sin I ever committed in my life. You never said goodbye. Perhaps that's why it hurts so much... Forgot to ask, have you yet sorted out those things?... Your never breaking silence says you haven't. Or are you surprised that I still remember that. Perhaps you have forgotten... Don't say you've forgotten. It'll hurt me more knowing the one I can't forget has forgotten all about me... Your memories keep leaking out of my brain. making me smile like a fool sometimes and other times cry like a hopeless idiot. Right now, they're all I have. It'd be nice if I had many more of them... I regret many things. So many things I could have done. I could have helped you out in your busy life. I could have tried to be more affectionate, tried to fight a little less with you. I could have given you more hugs and kisses and many more things. But I don't regret any of the moment I spent with you... Leaving me was your choice and I respect that but being struck to you is mine... I remember you playfully warned me one day that you'll ruin me on day and I remember smiling and telling you 'I'd be happy if you're the one who ruins me'. Smile... Where are you now that I'm all ruined? Baby, did you by any chance snuck my smile in your bag that day and stole it? You thief! Wasn't my heart enough for you? So greedy you are... Once upon a time, I was cold, you warmed me. Your smile, your beauty, your cuddles, your thoughts, your affection, they all were so warm. You set me on fire and burnt me to ashes. I still remember the vows we once took. It wasn't in front of anyone. That night, we both were both tipsy, laying on bed and looking at each other right in eyes. You took the first vow of being with me in happiness and sadness, in highs and lows. I took the second vow of always loving me and me alone till death does us apart. Till death does us apart it was. I wonder if I'm already dead and I've been sent to this hell for my sin. This hell where I live and you aren't with me. I heard hell is hot but here I am now, all cold, grieving and mourning with my frozen tears for the things I can no longer repair... I guess my emotions got the better of me just now but don't get me wrong, I'm not saying all these things to make you feel terrible and think about the things you did to me. Neither am I asking you to come back to my life even though I'm ready to beg for it. All I wanted was to get these things out of my chest you know. These things have been piling up inside me since then. Thanks for listening to my venting if you haven't stopped listening yet. I promise I won't do it again. Well, I'll try my very best not to. I'll hang up now. Bye... Oh and I almost forgot to say... I love you... Will always do, my sweetheart...