Dear love,

You're there again. Aren't you? Knocking the door of my fortress, asking me to open it. I know you're there.

You know, as I feared, I wasn't able to feel if you were really out there. You may be wondering if that was the case, how did I know you were there.

I know it's you because I heard you shouting out - "I'm love. Open the door." I don't even know if it's really you or someone is trying to trick me again.

Love, you know, despite everything, when you told me it's you out there, I was really happy. I was glad to know that if it's you, you would be able to break it. Because You're all mighty, love. I made this fortress for you to break.

But you got tired of trying to smacking on these doors. You face away and say the words I never wanted to hear because you think I made this all just to keep you away.

Perhaps the walls are too thick this time. Perhaps your strength is pale in comparison. Perhaps this fortress is never gonna fall.

You're leaving.

Once again.

Love. I'd have loved if you say by the door for longer. I'd have loved if we could have sat with our backs on the same door and talk. I'd have loved you being there.

I don't know how long it would have taken for me to get out of there. Perhaps forever wouldn't have been enough. Perhaps I won't be ever same again.

I know I was asking you to fight me for myself. I know it was too much. I know I was being selfish and greedy. But can't I be selfish sometimes?