The hardest battle that hurt me the most:

I lost myself in the world
I live alone and no one care
I'm just worried that one day, no one will recognize my worth

I'm just a piece of chess, once already picked and checked in, I'm no longer important
I'm just nothing and not worth taking care of
My life is always like this and maybe I forever like this

Just nobody and that's it
No one cares about my feelings and what life might I have
No one dares to ask me if I'm okay or not
No one can understand my worth and acknowledgment

It hurt me this much but who I am to ask more than what it takes
Deep inside it's killing me yet I need to accept and let it go
The pain ruined me, and I almost ruined everything and let myself into the deepest water of chaos

It's my life and journey whether I like it or not
I need to keep walking and let no one mislead me into something I'm not
They should see my worth and my essence
And find my capability to be important

But who I am to speak like this, I'm just nobody and nothing else
I'm tired already and I need my life to be renewed
I'm tired of walking and fighting
I'm out of balance anymore though I need to run

I'm out of breath though I need my strength and resilience to keep moving forward
I need to be part of myself
And not feel regret having a good heart

Do I useless or just no one who acknowledges my worth
No one can fully understand what journey I need to be through
No one can appreciate my existence and my battlefield of having a strong physicality and being broken internally

I'm tired, really tired
I don't need anyone though I need someone
I don't want to speak up but I need someone who can appreciate my value and existence
I no longer feel pain but I do see how pain ruined myself and my body

I'm not crying but deep inside me, my world and worth shaking into pieces
My loneliness and pain of living eating me alive and broken
Do I blame myself or just part of growing into a new
Do I need someone or just let them hurt me this much all over again
I'm tired and I need space to cry and breathe in and out

Where do I find it
How many times do I need to feel the same emotions all over again
How many decades do I need to accept the pain they put me through
What should I do to let this emotions become yesterday and never encounter it anymore

What life may come to my life
What situation do I need to fight for
And who I am to feel this moment
Do I need to let it go and let it be done perfectly or do I need to stay on my feet until my world shakes into a new direction of change

Can I go back to the past without regret
Can I live forever in the journey of immaturity and not feel this pain anymore
Can I live in the journey of my youthfulness
And live forever young and free from everything

I'm tired and I hope to see the beauty of life
I'm tired and I hope to live happy and free
And I hope I might feel this way before I DIE
And before I lost my chances and wanted to live on this earth.