"Are you sure?" Mrs. T gives me the same confused look Michelle and Bridget had. Only se tries not to show her shock.

I nod, solemn and determined. "Maybe being back where I spent the first years of my life will be good for me."

Mrs. T nods slowly. "If that's what you want sweetheart..."

My heart breaks a little. I didn't mean to cause any of the Tolias any sort of heartache. Had they really started to see me as a real part of their family? It shouldn't be terrible to see me go... Right?

I push my doubts down with a hard swallow and nod again.

"Ummm ok. I can help you pack up I guess and.... I... Ummm.... I'll call your Aunt."

She rushes off, looking dazed. I spin on my heels, my arms crossed over my chest and drying tears leaving a line of crust on my cheeks. The only things I really own are some clothes a book or two. So, packing shouldn't be hard....

I swallow the huge lump that has formed in my throat and breath deeply, trying to stop my eyes from spilling over again. This is good. I'll be ok. Aunt Cassie.... I'll... Forgive eventually. In the meantime, I'll make up for lost time with Josie and get Franklin to trust and love me again.

I look around the kitchen. Everything in me screams, Don't go Gen! You can't run! You have to stay!

I squeeze my eyes shut and shake my head. No one gets it, not even my conscience. I can't stay. I have the dreadful feeling that... Well, Lacy can only get lucky so many times before she...

I shake my head again. I just can't. I'm done losing family. I'm not strong enough to help the Tolias get through whatever's coming next now that the cancer is back. Somehow, I feel I'll only add to their suffering. I don't want to know what happens to her. Unless, by some miracle, she beats... Then I'd want to know I guess...

I blink, snapping out of my rambling thoughts. I scrape the streams of crust off my cheeks and march up the stairs.

I get to the entrance of our room and see that Bridget is still in there, although Michelle has left. I look cautiously behind me, wondering if Michelle has talked to Megan about what I said and worrying the two are going to come crashing down the hall looking for me and demanding answers. When I'm convinced that they aren't coming- at least not yet- I look back towards Bridget.

She is sitting on her plaid print bed with puffy red eyes. She's holding her knees to herself, gripping like her legs will fall off if she let go.

I suck in my breath as I enter the room. Her head snaps up to me. I meet her gaze for a moment, than break away and silently open my dresser.

I take everything out. It's not much. A pile of jeans; about ten t-shirts, some socks and underwear. I start setting it all on my bed in separate piles. I know Bridget's watching my every move but not daring to look back at her. The silence physically hurts. Bridget breaks it at last.

"Gen... Why...?"

I thrust my last pair of jeans onto a pile with a huff. Making my voice sound cheerful and light sounds like a good idea, so I try it.

"Ah, Bridge, don't do that," I say flashing her a sideways smile. I tried to make it look genuine but it ended up just feeling pitiful.

"Do what?"

I sigh and close my eyes briefly before mustering up the courage to face her full on.

"Don't cry over this. We won't be far at all," I offer.

"I guess but... What about Lacy?"

My heart seems to stop briefly. I turn my back so I can walk towards our closet to see if there's a suitcase in there. "What about her?" I mumble lamely before swinging open the closet door.

"What about her???" Bridget scoffs, anger in her voice. "Her cancer's back, Gen, that's what's 'about her.'"

I pull out a small, blue suitcase and slam the door of the closet. After that I just stand there, staring at the white door. There's a chip out of it that I'd never noticed before.

"Gen!"

My eyes shift to the ground and I slowly turn around. "Yeah... I know," I respond.

"And you suddenly don't care?" Bridget cries.

I don't want us to end up yelling at each other again. I breath deeply through my nose and say, "Of course I care."

Here I go, trying to look strong again, but my voice had cracks when I say those words.

I look up at Bridget again. Her face has softened a little. She lets go off her knees and swings her legs off the bed. I fling my suitcase on my bed and open it up. One by one, the various articles of clothing go into it.

"Then... Why...?" Bridget asks.

I walk over and grab my book, "Sarah's Key," from my nightstand. I study the cover for a moment before simply tossing it back. "You can have that," I mutter to Bridget, avoiding her question. Bridget, in turn ignores my statement and continues to stare me down, waiting for an answer.

"Gen, what about the other kids you see at the hospital every day?"

I freeze momentarily, just as I'm about to zip the suitcase shut. I'd been surrounding myself with people I very well knew I could lose any day. I'd sat at so many children's bedside as a doctor stood by, preparing to tell us news. I'd seen so many children get the same news Lacy did. "It's back..." What made this next heart wrenching discovery so hard to take? Why couldn't I be there and hold her hand, tell her I'd help her get through? When did the pain just become too much?

I shake my head and resume closing the suitcase. "I'll say goodbye to them," I mutter. I grab the handle of my suitcase and race out the door before she gets me crying again.