15 February 2001

«Remember what I told you?», my dad asked me, a little before going out of the house holding my hand to have our usual evening walk.

«That I should always put chocolate in the fridge?», I replied and he laughed a bit.

«No, not that my little idiot», he responded sweetly, caressing my hair. «That no matter what you you're going through, you always are one thing. A fighter. At least in your soul. You better keep it at the right place kiddo», I nodded and smiled at him. At that point of my life I could only understand what he meant at some point.

«Dad, do fighters eat ice cream? Because I'd really want to have some...», I questioned him, out of curiosity. He smirked and nodded while caressing my hair.

«Sure. Sure they do kid! Or else how do they find the energy to keep fighting?», he joked. I was a little kid so I thought he was serious. I used to love ice cream as a kid.

«Then I already love being a fighter!», I announced, raising my hands to the sky.

«Trust me, little one, you are going to need really much ice cream in your life. But I really hope you won't, although I can't promise anything», that made me sad. Then I couldn't understand what he meant, but still something inside me was touched by his words.

«But dad! I love ice cream! I hope life gives me as many ice cream as possible!», I told him, raising my head to look bigger.

«Okay... Okay », he laughed. «Let's go get you some ice cream then!».

We left the house and went to the ice cream van. My dad bought me my usual one, vanilla and chocolate with Oreos and strawberries. We kept walking across our quiet neighborhood.

We used to do that every night around 8:00. Both of us loved that habit of ours. It kept us together during hard times. Like when mom was caught by the police, taking drugs. It was really rough, although I don't remember much since I was a little younger.

That night was like every other night out with my dad. But then it wasn't. I noticed that dad held me closer to him as we were walking by a scary street.

Many men started getting near us. That scared me a little, but I always felt safe when my dad was there.

«Leins!», I heard one of them yelling my and dad's last name. My dad stopped walking, and so did I. We faced a grown-up man, around his thirty's, same age as my father, right opposite us surrounded by 7 other men. My dad took a deep breath.

«Neil. I'm with my daughter», that sounded a lot like a warning, although it actually was a request.

«I want my money, John. I don't care about this little shit. I care about my money», they started getting closed, and I hid myself behind my dad, out of fear.

«Neil, please. I don't have it at the moment, although I promise...», that guy called Neil interrupted my father immediately.

«A deal is a deal, John. Something you always forget... Sorry I can't do anything about it...», the seven guys behind Neil got in front of him and started walking towards us.

My dad turned to me. He kneeled to talk to me.

«Hey, D. I want you to keep that for me, okay? Keep it safe, for me», he said and gave me a pair of gloves without fingers, that I had given to him the last time we saw mom. I nodded, quite scared.

«It's one of the moments I told you. Right now, Daddy needs to be a fighter, okay?», he told me.

«But, what if you lose?», I asked him, trembling. I was too innocent to be able to think what would've happened if he lost.

«Then, I'll be proud I tried», he responded immediately.

I jumped in his hug and hugged him as tight as Icould thinkingthat would give him strength. «I love you daddy».

«I love you more, baby... I promise», he said. He got up, took off his jacket, threw it on the street, and turned around to face Neil. I watched him walking towards him.

«Look, if I do this... You have to promise to leave her outta this. It's between us, she's innocent», my dad demanded, meaning me. Neil thought about it for a while.

«A deal is a deal, John», he repeated. «And the deal was between me and you. This broken condom you walk around with calling her daughter has shit to do with that, so she's safe. Don't worry, don't let her hold you back», he replied while taking his jacket off too. Two men came towards me and stood in front of me like guards. They placed their hands in front of me, holding me back too so I wouldn't do anything like run in to stop them.

That guy called Neil started punching and kicking my dad, and my dad did the same, although my dad was also trying to defend himself. At times, he took looks at me, but he kept on fighting.

I was crying. Yelling my dad's name. I did try to escape from the hands of the two men, but they kept holding me, with more strength each time. I knew my father was strong, but the other guy was really beating him up. Then Neil threw my dad on the ground. My dad wasn't able to stand up, I had noticed that.

«STOP! DON'T YOU SEE HE CAN'T STAND» I screamed. My dad took a last look at me. A look filled with both pain and hope. A looked full of meaning.

«I KNOW THAT YOU LITTLE SHIT! HOW ELSE WOULD I DO THIS?», he kicked my father's jaw with his foot, and then I heard it. Crack. My ice cream fell off my hand. His jaw... It was broken. I saw my dad's face a second later. No emotion. He wasn't blinking. Nothing.

«DAD!!!!!!!», I screamed. I burst into tears, screaming in pain. The two men took off their hands, and I ran to my dad.

I touched him. His face. It felt so...

Cold.

Dead.

«Ha!», Neil laughed. «Look at you now,  John! See where this precious thing called family got you», he kept mocking my dead dad.

«Hey! Family is one of the most important things in life! I love mine!», I replied.
«Right!», he laughed. «The one which you no longer have», he thought what he said was just so funny.

«You... you... psycho!», this was the only word I could come up with.

He looked at me, upset. «What did you just call me?», he asked.

I got quiet. I knew I shouldn't respond. He walked towards me and took something out of his jacket. I could see it clearly. It was a knife.

I was so scared and started running away, but one of his men grabbed me.  He turned me to face him giving him my hand.

Neil looked at it and smiled in an evil way.

«Okay you little one. Consider this your punishment for what you just said. It'll hurt a little », he said and started stabbing my hand. He stabbed it 5 times and then they let go of me. I was screaming,  feeling powerless. I crawled towards my dad's dead body and cried over it.

This night was the darkest night of my life. I think someone found us and called an ambulance but I don't remember much since I lost my senses.

I'm never gonna forget this psycho laugh that was coming from his mouth. Or any of this.
............................................................................

A bit emotional, sorry...

But that's just the beginning folks! I think the rest of the book will be a bit less emotional... I can't promise, though...

We should remember, though, that such things are happening in reality too, which makes it sadder than it already is... 🥺🥺🥺

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