11 - an absolute lovesick ninny

"No grades at stake, folks. Just take a stroll," Keating said, waving a hand at Cameron, Pitts, and Knox who begin walking around in a circle in the courtyard.

After a few moments, the three boys begin to march to the same beat.

"There it is," Keating said.

The other boys and Maria started clapping to the rhythm of their steps.

"I don't know, but I've been told - " Keating started.

"I don't know, but I've been told -" the boys echoed.

"Doing poetry is old -"

"Doing poetry is old-"

"Let, left, left-right-left. Left, left, left-right-left. Left, halt!" Keating held up a hand and the boys came to a stuttering halt. "Thank you, gentlemen. If you noticed, everyone started off with their own stride, their own pace."

Keating began walking very slowly. "Mr. Pitts, taking his time. He knew he'll get there one day. Mr. Cameron, you could see him thinking, 'Is this right? It might be right. It might be right. I know that. Maybe not. I don't know'."

The students chuckled softly and then Keating began walking with his groin pushed forward. "Now, Mr. Overstreet, driven by deeper force," the chuckles turned into laughter now as Knox looked around sheepishly, running his fingers through his hair. "Yes. We know that. All right."

Keating looked around at the students. "I didn't bring them up here to ridicule them. I brought up them here to illustrate the point of conformity: the difficulty in maintaining your own beliefs in the face of others. Now, those of you - I see the look in your eyes like, 'I would've walked differently.' Well, ask yourselves why you were clapping."

He let the idea resonate for a while. "Now, we all have a great need for acceptance. But you must trust that your beliefs are unique, your own, even though others may think them odd or unpopular, even though the herd may go, 'That's baaaad.' Robert Frost said, 'Two roads diverged in a wood and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.'. Now, I want you to find your own walk right now. Your own way of striding, pacing. Any direction. Anything you want. Whether it's proud, whether it's silly, anything. Gentlemen, lady, the courtyard is yours."

The students dispersed, some walking with confidence, others unsure of themselves, and some walking in the weirdest and silliest ways they could possibly think of.

Maria walked with a slight bounce in her step, eyes flickering around the courtyard as she searched for her own walk.

Charlie, on the other hand, stood at the edge of the courtyard, leaning against one of the pillars with his arms crossed.

Keating noticed. "You don't have to perform. Just make it for yourself. Mr. Dalton? You be joining us?"

Charlie smirked and shook his head. "Exercising the right not to walk," he said.

"Thank you, Mr. Dalton," Keating hummed. "You just illustrated the point. Swim against the stream."

Maria walked over to him, the silver clip in her hair twinkling in the sunlight, and he looked over her with flirty eyes. She'd been opting for tailored pants a lot more with the colder weather coming in, but it was nice enough today for her to wear a skirt and Charlie wouldn't deny he always appreciated the sight of her in a plaid skirt and knee-high socks.

"Hey there, rebel," she said with a teasing smile, joining him.

Charlie grinned back at her. "Can't help it. I've always been a troublemaker, you know," he winked.

Maria giggled. "Of course."

They stood in comfortable silence for a few moments, watching the other students walk through the courtyard.

"So, doll," Charlie said, breaking the silence. "Did you figure out your walk yet?"

Maria shrugged. "Not sure," she said. "Though, I'm certain my walk is more unique than all of you boys already."

"Don't know," Charlie said. "Cameron might rival your feminine sway."

Maria laughed, shaking her head. "You're awful, Charlie."

"You like it though," he said.

Maria said nothing, the tension between them growing tenfold before Charlie spoke again. "Take a walk with me, doll?" He said, pushing off the pillar.

Maria smiled. "It'd like that."

They set off together, walking side by side, their footsteps in sync. After a bit, Charlie offered her his arm and Maria looped her arm through his, leaning into him slightly.

"You're being quite a gentleman, Charlie Dalton," she said, looking up at him through her lashes.

Charlie shrugged. "What can I say, I'm a rebel with a gentleman's charm."

She giggled, shaking her head at him and they continued walking.

Their friends, scattered around the courtyard, exchanged knowing glances, trying not to be too obvious in their amusement at the sight of Maria and Charlie together, but failing quite badly at it.

Keating, too, watched the two of them from afar with a knowing smile, silently rooting for his niece and her obvious crush.

"Is this helping you figure out your walk?" Charlie asked.

Maria looked thoughtful for a moment before responding. "I don't know. Maybe a little. You think it's okay to keep figuring it out?"

Charlie nodded. "Definitely, but it's more fun figuring it out together, isn't it?" He squeezed her arm gently and Maria blushed, feeling her heart race just a little faster.

It certainly was nice to figure it out together.

••●••

Later that day, Neil paused when he noticed Todd sitting off by himself on one of the walkways.

"Todd? Hey?" Neil said, approaching him with the notes for his play in hand.

"Hey," Todd said, looking up slowly.

"The others are in study group if you want to join them," he said and then paused when he noticed something off about Todd. "What's going on?"

Todd shook his head. "Nothing. Today's my birthday."

"Is today your birthday?" Neil asked with a smile. "Happy birthday."

"Thanks," Todd said.

"Is that what you got?" He pointed out something on the ground in front of Todd with his foot.

Todd nodded. "My parents gave me this."

Neil looked down, making out the outline of a desk set sitting next to Todd, still in its wrappings. He frowned, eyebrows crinkling. "Isn't this the same desk set-"

"Yeah, yeah," Todd said, nodding dejectedly. "They gave me the same thing as last year."

"Oh."

"Oh."

Neil laughed suddenly, trying to lighten up the mood. "Maybe they thought you needed another one," he said with a shrug.

Todd shrugged again. "Or maybe they weren't thinking about anything at all, he said. "Uh, the funny thing about this is I, I didn't even like it the first time."

Neil looked at Todd for a moment, knowing all too well the feelings that must be circulating through Todd at that moment and determined to make things a little better. "Todd, I think you're underestimating the value of this desk set," he said.

Neil picked up the dest set and began examining it closely. "I mean, who would want a football or a baseball, or -"

"Or a car," Todd joined in.

"Or a car," Neil nodded, "if you could have a desk set as wonderful as this one? I mean, if, if I were ever going to buy a, a desk set, twice, I would probably buy this one both times." He studied the desk set with playful scrutiny. "In fact, its, its shape is, it's rather aerodynamic, isn't it? I can feel it. This desk set wants to fly."

Neil tossed the desk set lightly in the air and Todd stood up quickly as Neil handed him it.

"Todd? The world's first unmanned flying desk set," Neil grinned.

Todd matched his smile and flung the desk set over the side of the walkway and it scattered, falling as pieces down below. "Oh, my!" Todd laughed sarcastically, feeling a lot better.

"Well, I wouldn't worry," Neil said, stepping up beside him and throwing an arm over his shoulder. "You'll get another one next year."

••●••

The study group was gathered around a large wooden table, books and notes scattered everywhere around them. Maria sat next to Charlie, their elbows touching as they leaned over their textbooks. But Maria couldn't focus on the task at hand - history never did go well with her brain and Todd wasn't around to help her out with his bit-sized summaries - and so her eyes drifted towards the window.

Suddenly, she saw something falling through the air.

"Did anyone else see that?" She asked, perking up and looking around the table.

"See what?" Knox asked, looking up from his notes.

"Something fell outside, like a notebook or a piece of paper or something, "Maria said, uncertain, pointing towards the window.

"Maybe it's a ghost," Charlie teased, grinning at her.

Maria glared at him. "That's not funny, Charlie."

"What, are you afraid of ghosts?" Charlie asked, raising an eyebrow. "I'll protect you, doll. No need to be afraid."

The others rolled their eyes at the pair, used to their light flirting by now. But Charlie's attention was soon diverted when he noticed something written in Maria's notebook.

He leaned over, tapping the page with his pen. "What's this?"

"Oh, it's a poem I found," Maria said, thoughts moving away from the flying notebooks or pens or papers that she had seen.

"Read it," Charlie said. "We can't go out to the cave tonight because of the rain so read it here."

"Yeah, read it, Maria," Meeks said with an encouraging nod.

Knox nodded in agreement, pausing his work and resting his chin on his hand.

Pitts paused his work too.

"Okay," Maria said slowly. "You all might not like it though. It's feminist poetry."

A snort sounded at the end of the table and Maria glanced down at Cameron who was smirking arrogantly.

"Do you have something to say, Cameron?" Maria asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Feminist poetry?" He repeated dismissively, leaning back in his seat. "It's stupid. It doesn't have any meaning."

Charlie shot Cameron a dirty look. "Shut it," he said firmly, before turning back to Maria. "Don't bother with him. He's stupid. Please read it, Maria."

Maria took a deep breath, feeling her cheeks warm with embarrassment. She had always been a little self-conscious about her interest in feminist literature and poetry, especially around the boys in their group who could sometimes be a little dismissive, and a little sexist at times.

But she decided to push past her nerves and read the poem out loud:

"I should be happy with my lot:

A wife and mother - is it not

Enough for me to be content?

What other blessing could be sent?


A quiet house, and homely ways,

That make each day like other days;

I only see Time's shadow now

Darken the hair on baby's brow!


No world's work ever comes to me,

No beggar brings his misery;

I have no power, no healing art

With bruised soul or broken heart.


I read the poets of the age,

'Tis lotus-eating in a cage;

I study Art, but Art is dead

To one who clamors to be fed


With milk from Nature's rugged breast,

Who longs for Labour's lusty rest.

O foolish wish! I still should pine

If any other lot were mine."


Maria finished reading, "By Elizabeth Drew Barstow Stoddard."

"Wow," Charlie spoke up, "that... that was really powerful," he said, looking at Maria with newfound respect. "What does it mean to you?"

Maria hesitated for a moment before responding. "I just... I don't think I could bear it, the thought of my future being limited to just being a wife and a mother," she admitted. "I want to have a career and make a difference in the world too. I want to do both."

"But the opportunities for women aren't like the ones you all have," she said softly. "You have opportunities like this -" she gestured around them, "-going to Welton, a school that's fast-tracking you all into the Ivy Leagues. Girls, we don't get opportunities like that."

Charlie nodded thoughtfully, tucking the end of his pen between his lips. "I get it," he said, a hint of understanding in his eyes and the other boys hummed in agreement.

Cameron, however, snorted again. "Whatever, it's still stupid," he muttered under his breath and turned back to his work.

Maria rolled her eyes at him but didn't say anything. It didn't matter what people like Cameron thought.

Charlie noticed Maria's discomfort and decided to intervene. "Hey, Cameron, you don't have to agree with her, but you do have to respect her thoughts," he said firmly. "Maria's ideas are important, they aren't stupid... if anything they matter much more than your stupid ones."

Maria's heart swelled with gratitude towards Charlie, feeling validated and feeling truly seen for the first time in the group of boys. She smiled at him, grateful for his support.

After everyone returned to their work, Charlie leaned in closer to her, his voice dropping to a whisper. "Don't worry, doll. I'll get Cameron back later tonight when he falls asleep," he said with a mischievous grin.

Maria laughed quietly. "Thank you," she said to Charlie, still smiling. "I really appreciate your support."

He smiled back at her. "Anytime," he said and he reached over and squeezed her hand. "And you can do it all, you know. If anyone can, it'll be you, Maria. You can be a wife, a mother, and have a career too. You can do anything you want to. I'm sure of it."

Maria felt her heart swell with a new sense of possibility. "Thanks, Charlie," he said and he smiled, looking down at the table to make sure that the others were too distracted with their work to pay attention before he brought her hand up to his lips and kissed her skin softly.

Maria blushed wickedly, feeling a rush of heat spread across her cheeks at Charlie's unexpected gesture. "Charlie..." she murmured, feeling a flutter in her stomach. Damn, those butterflies.

He grinned at her, eyes sparkling with mischief, squeezing her hand once more before placing it gently on the table. "Sorry, couldn't resist," he said, chuckling softly. "But seriously, Maria. I meant it. Your thoughts and ideas are important. Don't ever let anyone make you feel like they aren't and if someone does, just let me know, and I'll deal with them like how I'll deal with Cameron later."

She couldn't help but smile, feeling something stir inside her at Charlie's serious protective tone of voice. "I appreciate it, Charlie," she said, her voice soft. "But I can handle myself, you know."

"I know you can," he said his grin widening. "I just don't like seeing anyone treat you unfairly. You deserve to be respected."

Maria smiled, looking down at her work, but entirely too distracted now to actually do her work. Thankfully, Dr. Hager swooped in, announcing that study hall was over and that they all had to return to their dorm rooms before lights out.

"I'll walk you back," Charlie said as they gathered their books.

"Okay."

"Good."

They walked through the halls of Welton in silence, but it was a comfortable one.

Maria kept replaying the moment when Charlie kissed her hand over and over again in her mind, feeling a warm tingling sensation all over her body. She stole a glance at him as they walked side by side and found him already looking at her with a soft smile on his lips. She looked away quickly, feeling her cheeks heat up.

When they finally reached her room, Maria turned to face Charlie, feeling a little awkward. "Goodnight, Charlie. Thank you for walking me," she said softly.

"Night, doll," he replied with a small smile. "Sweet dreams."

She nodded, feeling her tongue twist on itself. She wanted to say something more, to let Charlie know how much she appreciated him and his support and just how much she was falling for him, but the words wouldn't come out. Instead, she simply smiled at him before turning to unlock her door.

As she stepped inside her room and closed the door behind her, she leaned against it and closed her eyes, letting out a soft sigh. She couldn't believe how much she liked Charlie, how he made her feel. She tapped her feet against the floor, let out a little squeal of excitement, and grinned like an absolute fool - an absolute lovesick ninny. 

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