185

She felt him get closer and closer until finally he kissed her on the cheek. Her lips curved upwards as she smiled and opened her eyes. He then laid down next to her and she snuggled into him.

"Where's Vidya?" he asked her.

"Sleeping in Parth's room," Sanyukta informed.

"I see... maybe she wants to give her mom and dad alone time," Randhir teased.

"We'll have so much alone time in the next few days," Sanyukta replied, blushing faintly. "I'll miss her."

"I'll miss her too," Randhir replied, "But maybe it's necessary for us to be together alone."

"Yeah... I guess mom is keeping her here because she thinks that we should get to know each other and spend time together. If we have her with us, our minds will always be with her, won't it?" Sanyukta asked softly.

"Exactly," he said to her.

"Let's sleep now. We have a long day tomorrow," Sanyukta said.

They had to drive two hours to get to the cottage. It would be right by the lake though, so they would have a nice view... and they could even go outside and spend time by the water.

Randhir kissed her forehead, making her smile again.

"Good night," he whispered.

"Good night," she replied, feeling strangely excited for their honeymoon.

She lifted her head and rested it on his chest, as he caressed her arm. Then she fell asleep listening to his heartbeats... which oddly sounded familiar.

It was almost like she heard the same beat many times in herself.

186

The next morning they left early for their honeymoon. They didn't take the driver, but rather Randhir decided to drive. After all, he couldn't miss out on the opportunity to take his wife out on a long drive.

Throughout the ride, they just talked about work and Vidya, and Randhir teased her a little bit, but now she just laughed it off, because she was used to is flirty antics... or so she thought. Sometimes she still couldn't help but blush, because she took what he said seriously.

Finally they got to the cottage and parked the car. It was a small lakeside cottage. There was one bedroom and the cottage was very luxurious and nicely maintained. The bedroom was decorated with rose petals, as if the family had made arrangements to have it set up for them by the time they got there.

After unloading their suitcases, they both went outside to the lakeside, where they sat on a deck and dipped their feet in the water. Sanyukta unpacked some sandwiches that she brought from home when they left in the morning.

She thought it would be a good idea to have a small picnic lunch. Sanyukta fed Randhir as they watched the clear water, and then he took his turn feeding her too. After they were done, she rested her head on his shoulder and they watched the calm waves... it was like watching the water, calmed them down as well.

"It's nice we're here. It kind of cools down the humid weather," Sanyukta commented.

Randhir held his hand out, his palm facing upwards, for Sanyukta to hold. She smiled and held his hand, intertwining their fingers.

"It's really relaxing," Randhir murmured. "It's like there are no other problems that really exist."

"This feels perfect," she whispered.

Randhir rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb gently.

The sound of the waves splashing made her want to close her eyes and just lay here forever with Randhir.

"You, me, and this lake. What more do we need for perfection?" Randhir asked her softly.

This was her fairytale, with the prince she always imagined... but this seemed too easy, too perfect. How could her world change so quickly?

Was everything really perfect, or were there still dark times lingering in the distance ahead?

187

After a few hours of sitting by the lake with their feet dipped in the water and their hands clasped, Sanyukta closed her eyes and breathed deeply, smiling serenely.

Coming to this lake was perhaps the most perfect honeymoon destination. Being near the calm water, with nobody else around, made this blissful and perfect.

"I love this," Sanyukta murmured, opening her eyes.

"Look, the sun is setting," Randhir said.

They watched the sunset show its reflection in the lake, the orange hues shimmering in the clear water.

"It's beautiful," Sanyukta whispered.

Soon there were only shades of pink, red and orange, as the sun began to set completely. While the sun set, Sanyukta smiled, wondering if this was what life was about.

"It's most beautiful before it disappears... then it's dark for a while, but at one point the sun has to rise again, right?" she asked him softly.

Randhir squeezed her hand and nodded. Then he brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed the back of it softly.

She felt goosebumps erupt all over her body as Randhir kissed the back of her hand.

"It's always going to rise, and it'll be as bright as ever when it comes up," Randhir answered.

"Then what about when it falls again?" she asked, her heart hurting at the thought.

"That's life... it has to balance itself. The most depressing times have to be balanced with the happiest. The darkest times have to be balanced with the lightest... until everything falls to zero, neutrality," he murmured.

"But that's after death," she whispered.

"Complete death. Not death of the body," he replied.

"Complete death... like when your soul disappears too, and only energy remains?" she asked.

"Even energy won't remain," he whispered. "That's complete death... when nothing exists anymore."

Sanyukta lifted her head from his shoulder and tearfully looked at him.

"I love you Randhir," she whispered.

Randhir reached out to gently cradle her face between his hands.

"I love you too," he replied.

Then she leaned towards him, her nose touching his lightly, before she tilted it her head to the side, just so their lips could brush over each others.

How real was this world? What were consequences? What were acts?

If in the end, there would be total death, then feelings of regret or guilt would hold no importance.

It was about living in the moment of bliss, and that was what she decided to do.

As their lips touched, for a split second, both of them experienced this death, where the universe completely disappeared. Everything was gone... even they didn't exist.

188

Death. Was it possible that you were only born to experience death? Was that the reason you lived, so you could truly feel your death, and so you could see the beauty in it. Was death an act of love, just like life was?

How come living was supposed to be beautiful, but not death? If something expanded, it would have to collapse at one point too, right?

As she kissed Randhir, with the sun setting in the horizon, she knew that one thing was certain. If this was what death felt like, then she was willing to sacrifice a thousand of her own lives. If death was this beautiful and serene, then she was ready to lose herself forever.

He deepened the kiss, and she responded to it, feeling the same butterflies in her stomach... except, this time it was different. It was more intense. Everything was more intense... even her feelings for him.

Now, she didn't want anymore distance. She wanted to experience the universe with him. Sanyukta wanted to wrap her arms around him and get so close to him, that she experienced this death every second of every day.

She rested one hand on the nape of his neck and the other one on his chest as she inched closer to him on the deck, her lips working with his with so much love. It was perfect. They were in complete sync... their lips, their thoughts, their feelings. Everything fit together perfectly.

Their breathing was even rhythmically matching. They couldn't distinguish between their heartbeats, nor could they feel anything apart from complete and total bliss.

Randhir brought one hand over to the back of her head and gently laid her down on top of the deck, without breaking the kiss. His lips were still working on hers passionately, as he lifted her blouse gently, his hands sliding underneath her shirt, to caress her stomach. There was a tiny ten week pregnancy baby bump there, and Randhir slid his fingers lovingly across her navel, upwards. Then his fingers trailed up to her chest, her shirt climbing up with his hand.

They hadn't stopped kissing. In fact, Sanyukta had one hand on the back of his neck, and the other one was trying to unbutton his shirt so she could get easy access to his body as well.

Totally living. That was what this was... because totally living was equivalent to totally dying.

189

Their kisses didn't stop, and neither did their hands. It was like they weren't going to stop for anything today as all of their clothes fell to a pile beside them. The sun had already set, and they were engulfed in darkness, yet all they saw was light.

Randhir was kissing Sanyukta everywhere he had access to - her face, her neck, her breasts, her stomach, her most sensitive areas, all the way down her legs to her feet. It was like he wanted to feel every part of her.

She never felt this loved before. His mouth on her was making her feel certain sensations inside that she had never felt to this level. Perhaps it was her love for him, or because he was more focused on giving her pleasure than attaining pleasure for himself, but she felt amazing.

Finally, she pushed him back on the deck and climbed over him, kissing him deeply as his hands rubbed her back, pulling her closer to him. Sanyukta then broke the kiss and started to give him the same pleasurable experience that he had just given her.

It was only after she was done that she allowed their bodies to merge. When their bodies became one though, it was like the universe fell apart.

Death in its essence.

It was total surrender... because all they felt at that point was a powerful and immeasurable feeling of bliss.

Finally, Sanyukta fell on top of Randhir on the deck, her head resting against his sweaty chest, as she took deep breaths. Randhir caressed her hair and she smiled, snuggling into him.

She was ready to just fall asleep here.

"Are you okay?" he asked her after a few moments of silence.

"I've never been better," she replied, a glow on her face. "I am so happy."

Randhir rubbed her back lovingly for a few minutes, before the two of them decided to go inside. They slipped on their clothes and Randhir picked her up in his arms, causing her to giggle.

He kissed her all over her face, as he took her inside the cottage and placed her on the bed.

Their clothes didn't stay on for very long though, because the two of them were at it again.

190

A dark figure was looming in the doorway to her room and Sanyukta was all alone. Her head lifted off her pillow and she sat up straight as she watched the figure approach her.

"Randhir?" she called out.

"Sanyukta," a man's voice said, and it was so familiar that her heart began to beat erratically and her eyes filled with tears.

"Rehaan?" she breathed out fearfully, her voice cracking.

She got out of bed and approached the tall figure slowly. She couldn't see his face, but she had no doubt that it really was him.

Finally, a flame appeared in front of him and behind this flame his features were illuminated... and he didn't look happy.

"How could you Sanyukta?" Rehaan asked her, his eyes holding anger, his voice holding pain. "I haven't been gone for a month and you've already married Randhir? You slept with him? Were you ever serious about me?"

"Rehaan," Sanyukta whispered, tears pouring down her cheeks, and she reached out to hold his cheeks, but her hands just slid through his face.

It was like he was a ghost.

"You slept with my brother, despite being married to me. You lied to me that you were carrying my child... and now that I'm gone, you married him? Where has your commitment gone?" Rehaan asked, sounding very hurt.

"Rehaan I'm sorry," she whispered, sounding guilty. "I'm sorry..."

"When you claimed to love me, when you pretended you would stay with me for your whole life... you lied?" Rehaan asked painfully.

"No, I didn't know this would happen. I - I didn't know you would go away from my life," she told him. "I swear I was ready to be yours for my whole life b - but you left!"

"So your love only extends to this physical body?" Rehaan asked.

"No," Sanyukta whispered. "I - I don't know!"

"Do you love me or not Sanyukta?" Rehaan's voice said, now sounding cold and angry.

"Y - yes of course!" she told him fearfully. "Rehaan of course I love you!"

How could she not love someone she had been living with for the last three years? How could she not care for him and feel for him? She loved Rehaan... but perhaps she was never in love with him.

"Then prove to me that your love extends past your body. Come with me Sanyukta," Rehaan said and he gripped her hand tightly... it was like he had suddenly turned solid.

His hand was cold and forceful.

"B - but Randhir! I can't leave Randhir!" Sanyukta begged. "I married him!"

"If death has separated us, and I can't come back to you, then I can at least bring you to me," he informed, his words so cold, that she felt like her lungs froze.

Then he started to drag her out of the door and she was having a difficult time breathing.

"S - stop! I - I have to be with Randhir!" Sanyukta begged. "I can't c - come with you!"

Rehaan continued to pull her out of the doorway, and she saw a white translucent wall... perhaps he was walking towards that. She was afraid of what would be on the other side.

"Death isn't so bad," Rehaan said, as he approached the white wall with her. "It can get lonely though... at least if I have you with me, we can go through it together, like companions. Aren't we companions Sanyukta? Don't tell me that my death marked the time that we must part?"

"Randhir," Sanyukta whispered fearfully, as Rehaan pulled her through the white wall. "Randhir..."

All of a sudden, she came to her senses and sat up on the bed sweating.

"Randhir!" she sobbed, tears flowing down her cheeks.

Randhir sat up on the bed with her and wrapped his arms around her.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"R - Rehaan! He was just here," she whispered fearfully. "He was taking me with him... to the other side of the wall... towards death."

"Shh, it was a nightmare," Randhir murmured, caressing her hair as she sobbed into his shoulder.

"I don't want to die," she confessed. "I want to live... with you. I don't want to part with you... not anymore."

She wrapped her arms around him too and suddenly, she felt safe again.

191

Sanyukta had fallen asleep in Randhir's arms again, feeling safe in his embrace. She woke up the next morning to his kiss, and she smiled against his mouth.

"Good morning," he whispered to her, his warm hand on her cheek.

"Good morning," she replied softly.

Randhir reached down between her legs, causing her eyes to widen.

"Randhir," she whispered as his fingers found his destination.

"Sanyukta," he replied softly, with a twinkle in his eyes.

Then she began to moan.

Finally after she climaxed, Randhir kissed her lips again and she leaned into his chest, taking deep breaths.

"I really love you," she whispered.

"I love you too," he replied, a small smile on his lips.

The next three days passed by really quickly, and soon they had come back home. Sanyukta was eager to get back to work, and Randhir was too. The two of them went back to working for Harsh.

Sanyukta's nightmares came back a few times, but with time they dissipated. Soon, she came to terms with her feelings as well.

The days turned into weeks, which in turn turned into months and Sanyukta was getting further along her pregnancy.

Finally, she gave birth to a healthy baby boy, who she named Atharva.

Randhir had been with her during the time of delivery, and he held the baby boy in his arms lovingly.

This was his son, and he would have it no other way.

The birth of the child marked a new dawn, but all that followed after dawn was dusk.

Soon, the years would pass, and when it came time to step up, there would be a bigger force that shot them back down.

The rise to presidency was never easy, and sometimes it even ended fatally.

192

Three years later, Sanyukta was in the President's office with Harsh, helping him work on a new bill that was going to be passed. His term was going to soon be over and then Sanyukta would be running in the next election. Harsh wanted to make sure they could transition into her presidency well.

Randhir entered the office, with a three year old Atharva in tow behind him. The boy frowned and watched his mom sitting beside his grandpa.

"What you are doing mumma?" Atharva asked cutely and walked up to his mom, trying to look at the screen.

"Mumma is helping grandpa with his work," Sanyukta replied to her son, and then picked him up and placed him on his lap. "Where's Vidya?"

"Vidya is with Parth uncle," Atharva said.

"Very good," Sanyukta replied and kissed the top of Atharva's head.

Vidya was now six years old and she would talk non-stop. She bonded especially well with her Parth uncle. She was a little annoyed that Atharva got so much attention and love, but she got used to it.

"Randhir, did you prepare the documents I asked for?" the President asked.

"Yes, they're on my desk. I'll just get them," Randhir replied, and went to the back office.

Atharva climbed off Sanyukta's lap and followed Randhir inside his office.

"Papa why is your office back here?" Atharva asked.

Randhir picked up Atharva in his arms and used his free hand to pick up the folder for his father.

"Because this is a very special place, so it needs to be well hidden," Randhir told Atharva.

"I want to be like you papa," Atharva replied with a wide smile. "Vidya says she wants to be like mumma but I want to be like you!"

Randhir smiled and kissed Atharva on the cheek.

"You and Vidya will both be great," Randhir said, and went outside with Harsh's files.

Sanyukta was now hard at work on writing her speech for the next election, sitting next to Harsh. She looked confused, like she didn't know what to write.

"Do we have to make a speech? Can't I just go and speak?" Sanyukta asked Harsh.

"Not yet," Harsh replied. "First you have to be able to speak diplomatically and not emotionally."

Sanyukta nodded grimly and went back to working on her speech.

"Randhir, tell Parth to come here. He can't always be playing video games," Harsh ordered. "I want him to start working for us."

"Parth doesn't want to," Sanyukta said, looking up.

"He has no choice," Harsh replied. "He has to."

Randhir nodded and took Atharva out of the room with him to inform Parth that he had no choice but to help his father.

193

A few nights later, Sanyukta got into bed next to Randhir and kissed him passionately in an attempt to relieve her stress. The elections were in a month and she would be competing against her own brother.

The public was starting to take well to the idea of a female president because in the last four years, Harsh eased them into it. She had good chances of winning... in fact, she probably had the best chances.

Randhir returned her kiss hungrily, his fingers brushing her hair to the side. Sanyukta started to take his clothes off, and he helped her in taking hers off. Soon their clothes fell to a heap on the ground and their bodies joined to make love.

After they were done, Sanyukta collapsed on top of him, breathing deeply.

"Thanks, that was a serious stress relief," Sanyukta said.

"It'll be okay. I promise," Randhir told her.

"I am just nervous," Sanyukta whispered.

"Nothing will happen to you. I won't let anything happen to you," Randhir said firmly.

"I don't know... it's not in our control," Sanyukta then said and closed her eyes, falling asleep in his arms.

It was the one place she found solace in this world. Randhir massaged her back gently until he fell asleep too, vowing that no matter what happened, he would protect Sanyukta.

However, sometimes there were certain limitations to a human body... and in the field of politics, danger always loomed ahead.

Sanyukta was right. Nothing was ever in their control.

What was waiting for them in the days leading to the election?

194

The days passed quickly, and finally there was only one week left for the elections. Sanyukta was reciting her speech in her bedroom, when Vidya walked in with a big grin on her face.

The six year old held out a chocolate bar for her mother and Sanyukta smiled in response.

"Sweetheart what is it?" Sanyukta asked.

"I know you worked hard mommy, so I got you chocolate!" Vidya said sweetly.

Sanyukta took the chocolate bar from her daughter and sat on the bed. Vidya took a seat next to her and watched her mom unwrap the bar. Then she broke a piece off and fed her daughter.

"Not everyday okay?" Sanyukta asked her.

"Of course not," Vidya said, nodding.

"So tell me. What do you need?" Sanyukta asked, because she knew of her daughter's manipulation techniques.

"Okay fine! Atharva won't give me my diary! He hid it somewhere and I can't find it! You have to yell at him!" Vidya demanded.

Sanyukta pulled on her daughter's cheek and smiled. The innocence of her daughter was all too sweet, and Sanyukta wanted to preserve it for as long as she could.

"I'll ask him to give it back okay?" Sanyukta asked, taking a bite out of the chocolate bar. "I have to go to the office now."

Then she handed the rest of the bar to Vidya and walked out of the room to go the President's office. There, she entered the back office where Randhir was working and logged on to her computer.

"How's the speech going?" Randhir asked her.

"It's okay... Randhir, you promise me you'll help me make decisions right? Even if I appear as president, we will be co-presidents... just nobody has to know. I'll like it if we can work together as equals," Sanyukta confessed from her computer.

"I'll help in any way that I can," Randhir said.

Sanyukta went through her e-mails and she saw one in particular that made her gasp.

It was from her father. The subject read: Daughter, forgive me.

Tears filled her eyes as she opened it. She hadn't seen her family since the last elections.

Sanyukta,

I know I have been very harsh on you and I used you for my own benefit... I want you to forgive me, even if I don't deserve it. Your mom still pines for you to this day. Can you forgive me? We want to speak to you.

Love, Your father

Sanyukta started to sob uncontrollably. Randhir appeared by her side in no time and she wrapped her arms around his stomach from her seat, sobbing into his shirt. He read the e-mail and he immediately became suspicious.

How come they only remembered their daughter when she was one week away from running in the elections?

"I... my dad... they want me again," Sanyukta cried.

"Sanyukta, don't respond," Randhir told her right away. "Reply to them after the elections."

Sanyukta removed her arms from around him and glared at him.

"He's my dad!" she argued. "I - I can respond!"

"I don't doubt you, but don't you think it's a little too suspicious that he's sending you this a week before your elections?" Randhir asked.

"Maybe he has nothing to do now that he's retiring, so he remembered me... but he remembered me nonetheless. I don't care what caused him to... I - I want to talk to him," she said.

"Sanyukta, wait one week," Randhir ordered. "You can't use your emotions to make decisions that will affect your rise to presidency right now."

She held in her tears, logged off the computer and then stormed out of the room. Later on though, from the phone that Harsh gave her since she started working for them, she replied to her father.

She wrote:

Daddy, of course I forgive you. It's okay. Thank you for remembering me.

He replied right away.

Kishore: Will you come to our house to meet us?

Her emotions getting the better of her, she typed a quick response to her father.

Sanyukta: Yes. I'll come over.

195

That night, after she put the kids to sleep, she was sitting on the bed nervously. She didn't want to hide from Randhir that she wanted to visit her family... but what choice did she have? He would never let her go. Only she knew how hard it had been these past six years to live away from her mom and dad. The moment they wanted her back, she didn't want to waste another second.

"Randhir," Sanyukta said, placing her hand on his back.

"Hmm?" he asked, half-snoring.

"I need to talk to you," she whispered.

Randhir opened his eyes and moved his head on her lap, looking up at her expectantly. She caressed his hair and took a deep breath.

"It's hard being away from my parents," Sanyukta informed. "It's been six years, but time hasn't made it any easier... and now when they want to reconcile, it's harder to ignore them."

Randhir took her hand and squeezed it before bringing it to his lips and giving her a kiss.

"I know it's hard, but it's just one week. If you can wait six years then I know you can wait one more week," Randhir told her.

"Yeah... I guess..." she mumbled.

"Promise me Sanyukta that you won't do anything that could compromise with the elections," Randhir told her.

"I promise," she whispered, tears filling her eyes.

What if Randhir was right? Her father would go to any lengths to win and she knew that... but if that was the case, then after the elections he wouldn't want to see her again. If he didn't want to see her, how could she meet her mom again? He was her father, and even if he hated her, she still wanted to see him.

No... no matter what his intentions were, she would go to meet them. She would just be very careful with what she did and said, because they would probably try to exploit her in some way.

"I promise," she repeated... and it was almost like she was trying to convince herself that she would keep the promise.