LAST CHAPTER - The Singer and the Songwriter

Sa halos isang dekadang pagsusulat ni Kara ng kanta, ngayon lamang niya naranasang maparangalan at makilala bilang isang tunay na alagad ng sining.

"I made it!" Nanginginig ang boses niyang bumaling kay Oddity.

Oddity gave her the most sincere smile and gave her a hug. "I know, princess. Congratulations!"

She was nominated last month for the Songwriter of the Year in the 37th Awit Awards. The awarding was held at the New Frontier Theater to recognize the best musicians, performers, and songs in the Philippine music industry.

Nang dumalo siya ay hindi niya inaasahang masusungkit niya ang titulong iyon. It was one of her dreams and now, it was right in front of her. Her heart was overflowing with delight that she couldn't articulate. Para siyang lumulutang sa ulap.

Ang host ng programa ay bumaling sa kinauupuan niya saka matamis na ngumiti. The audience continued to clap their hands. When she stood up, the smile on their faces did not fade. Napuno ng palakpak ang buong auditorium dahil sa pagtayo niya. She smiled to everyone as she walked down the red carpet aisle with her hands cold and her feet shaking.

"Once again, let's give our warm welcome to Ms. Kassandra Sandoval for winning the Songwriter of the Year Award!" the host said, then handed her the glass carved like a treble clef plaque with her name written below.

Songwriter of the Year

Kassandra Maeve Sandoval

Mula sa plake ng pagkilala, lumipat ang mga titig niya sa dagat ng taong nasa loob ng theater. Her hands were still shaking and a drop of tears slip from her right eye. She looked up to stop herself from crying out of happiness then faced the crowd.

"I came here for this, but didn't expect I'll get it," she started. Tiningnan niyang muli ang plake at saka muling ibinalik ang tingin sa mga audience. "I was once told by my father that my dreams were all in vain. Music is useless and petty. Like pursuing it professionally wasn't even a choice. I remember I was crying when he tore up my music book because of placing second at our periodic examination. While picking the pieces on the floor, I promised that someday, I will make him proud."

While recalling her father, Kara gave a sincere grin. "Kanina, he was the one who's so nervous habang sakay ako ng kotse niya para ihatid. Dad was so proud that I got nominated." She tried to compose herself so that she won't cry on the stage.

"You see, only you know and define your happiness and successful achievement. You owe it to yourself. Others are only an inspiration or a challenge to do it rightfully, hence you owe it to yourself. My father was both my inspiration and my tough challenge. If I didn't take that challenge, I wouldn't be standing here tonight in front of you.

"To those who are listening, who have silent dreams, you have what it takes. You are capable of achieving even how wildest your dreams are. It's time to trust in the power of your dreams and break free from your fears."

The night where Kara lay down her pen and decided to stop writing songs flashed back in her mind. The night when she almost ended everything, her dreams, and her life. It had gloomy colors in it, but the colors gradually brightened as she accepted it and forgave herself for giving up. It came back, the indescribable color

"We have to see that failures and challenges are just temporary, but we still are whole and capable of a complete recovery. We are on a journey, we are on the road towards our dreams, to our reality." She smiled again and faced the audience with a fiercer and braver soul. "Tonight, I only have one question to ask. What is holding you back?

"That dream was planted in your heart for a good reason. Wake up and pursue it. Don't just follow it but rather chase after it. There's a world out there waiting for you. I hope someday, you'll have the courage to pursue what you really want. Because it's never too late to follow your dream. Thank you!"

She got deafening applauses from the audience as she descended on the stage. Nang makabalik siya sa upuan, Oddity came rushing to hug her.

"I'm so proud of you, princess," he whispered. Kara's heart melted and was filled with overflowing joy. Sa lahat ng taong nakilala niya, si Oddity ang nag-iisang hindi siya sinukuan. He was there from the beginning of her journey until the end.

Her eyes tear up. Humigpit ang yakap niya rito.

"Thank you, Kuya. Thank you for not giving up on me. I gave up on this passion, but you were there. You stayed and cheered for me to continue. Even when I don't believe in myself anymore, you are still there to make me feel that my talent is enough. You're the first person who believed that I was capable. That one, I owe it to you."

Kumalas si Oddity sa pagkakayakap sa kaniya. He was smiling ear to ear, one that she'd never thought she'll see.

"It's because I can still see the fire in your eyes. The fire that you once had when you argued with dad about that passion. Nakikita ko pa rin ang nakababatang kapatid ko na hindi mabitiwan ang music book niya kahit saan magpunta. I know that was the reason why you didn't burn all your music book, right?" He cupped her face and erased her tears.

"You kept saying you'd given up, but all you're waiting for is someone to give you the push. Someone that is confident in your talents. You owe none of us anything. It was only you. You made the decision to keep going, to keep the flame burning. It's time for you to acknowledge yourself, Kara."

Tumango siya. "Thank you for everything, Kuya."

Oddity laughed. "Take credit for Javaid's concept as well. He was the one who recommended you for writing my wedding song. That moron may kill me for taking all the credit."

She smiled sarcastically. Inaalala ang maaaring maging reaksyon ni Javaid.

"I can imagine his weird pouting face."

"And his puppy eyes," dagdag ni Oddity at sabay silang tumawa.

Javaid's competitiveness towards her made her shiver while also making her feel appreciated. Hindi niya maipaliwanag ang saya dahil biniyayaan siya ng dalawang kuya na palaging nandiyan kapag kailangan niya ng masasandalan. Hindi man niya masasabing perpekto siya bilang kapatid ng dalawa, ngunit hindi mapapantayan ng kahit anong parangal ang pagmamahal niya sa dalawa.

Later that night, Riella and Empty arranged a party in her condo. Excluding Janus, she hasn't seen him in four years since their last conversation.

"Congratulations on Kara's success!" Kohen exclaimed.

To toast, they all raised their champagne glasses. She sipped her champagne and then set the glass down on the coffee table. Naupo siya sa carpeted floor at humugot ng malalim na hininga.

"Congratulations again, Kara!" bati ni Vera na nakaupo sa sofa katabi ni Kohen.

"You deserve it more than anyone else," Kohen added as he massaged Vera's hand.

Ngumiti siya nang matamis. "Thank you for all your support. Lalong-lalo na sa production. I really appreciate it."

One of the best feelings she had was having someone who would support her in even the smallest achievements in life. One of the most valuable lessons she learnt was to surround herself with positive people like Riella, Javaid, Kohen, Vera, and Oddity who believed in her dream, encouraged her ideas, and brought out the best in her.

Akala niya dati, sapat nang may mga taong nakapaligid sa kaniya. Sapat nang may mga taong nakapalibot sa kaniya para masabing hindi siya nag-iisa. But she was wrong. It was always a good idea to cut ties with those who drain your energy and aren't good for your soul.

Kung hindi siguro niya ginawa iyon, hindi niya matatagpuan ang Empty. They became her second home, and no matter how difficult things got in the middle, she always found her way back to them.

"Princess, it wasn't a big deal. Aside from that, all of your songs were amazing." Si Oddity saka pinatugtog sa maliit na speaker ang sinulat niyang kanta.

The world changes, life goes on
And I still can't move on.

Naupo sa tabi niya si Riella saka sinalinan ang champagne glass niya ng panibago.

"Tama si Kuya Oddity, Kara. Your songs are great. I didn't know that you have a talent in singing. Though it kinda feel nostalgic dahil hindi si bads ang kumanta."

Uminit ang pisngi niya sa papuri ni Riella at sandaling natahimik sa huling sinabi nito.

"Right! It was your first song na hindi si Janus ang kumanta?" Vera ask amusedly.

The clock ticks, time flies by

But the tears don't stop flowing from my eye.

"Technically, yes." Kinalahati niya ang laman ng champagne glass na nasa harapan saka muling nagsalita, "It was the plan," she explained. "I wrote the song for Janus, and it was meant to be sung by him."

People come and then they go
But your absence is all I know.

Natigilan si Kohen sa pagmasahe sa kamay ni Vera. "A song written for Janus?"

Mabilis naman na lumingon sa kaniya si Oddity na kanina lang ay naka-focus sa cellphone. Tila nakarinig ng interesting na topic kaya natuon sa kanila ang atensyon.

Night passes and then the day
And I still think of you everyday.

Vera shifted her position from Kohen to face her. Nakangisi ito at tila kinikilig. "Sana all may songwriter na jowa."

"Gaga! Hindi nga sila magjowa!" Si Riella na nasa tabi niya.

Umirap lang si Vera at si Twyle naman na nasa tabi ni Oddity ang nagsalita.

"Eh 'di mas lalong sana all! Imagine! Kara wrote him a song. And Janus dedicated and named an entire album with 11 songs written for her! Tapos hindi pa sila noon? Oddity sang only one song for me. At hindi pa siya ang nag-compose," she added, pouting.

"Don't pout, wife. I married you!" Oddity said, hugging her. "What matters is the endgame."

Napailing na lamang siya sa kaharutan ng Kuya Ei niya. Hinarap siya ni Riella at saka hinawakan ang magkabilang balikat.

"You're still waiting for him, aren't you?" seryoso ang mukha ni Riella nang natungin siya.

Summer comes and then winter
But nothing makes me feel better.

Natahimik at ang tingin ng lahat ay naiwan sa kaniya. They were all waiting for her answer.

"I was." Malungkot na ngiti ang sumilay sa kaniyang labi. "But maybe, some people are not meant to stay, some are meant to depart so they can find where they truly belong."

Autumn comes and then fall
And I'm still here waiting for you to come.

Yumuko siya humugot ng malalim na buntonghininga. She stared at the bracelet he gave her and played with it before she spoke again.

"Janus needs to expand his horizons outside my borders. I also need to grow without him. We both learned that some plants grow faster when planted in separate pots. I realized that the highest form of love that you could give to someone is freedom."

She returned her gaze to them and smiled warmly.

"When he left, we let go of each other's hand. We let go of the love that was caging us and freed ourselves to grow. We set foot on different parts to find beauty in the absence of each other. I am free to do whatever I want, so is he. Despite everything, I chose to love him. I chose to be the person to whom he can always return, yet I keep my heart open to everything this life may bring."

Vera stood up and sat beside her. "If it's Janus or someone else, we're always here to support you."

Mas lumapit din sa kaniya si Riella saka siya ginawaran ng yakap. "I can't wait for that time to come. I hope I can find that kind of love, too, someday."

Kara gave Riella a small smile.

She believes that there's no such thing as the right person at the wrong time. Love doesn't strike at the wrong time and probably never to the wrong person. It knows how to wait and knows when to appear. You just have to wait patiently. Because the right person will never come at the wrong time, and the right time will never give you the wrong person.

"Ms. Kara!"

Napapitlag si Kara sa pagkakatulala nang tawagin siya ng isa niyang senior sa clinic. She closed her eyes first to soothe her aching head. Gawa iyon sa puyat at hangover kagabi. She haven't had a good sleep because of overthinking. Muli niyang iminulat iyon saka hinarap si Ms. Molina.

"Yes, po?"

"Congratulations pala," she excitedly said. Tumango si Kara at nakakunot pa rin ang noo. Nang mapansin ito ni Ms. Molina ay para itong natauhan at may inilabas na puting sobre at inabot sa kaniya.

"Someone delivered it yesterday. It was addressed to you."

Napatitig siya sa puting sobre saka muling nilingon si Ms. Molina. She smiled at her. "Thank you po!" Nagpaalam na rin ito para iwan siya.

Nang sumarado ang pinto sa office niya ay muling nabalik ang kaniyang atensyon sa puting sobre. Sumandal siya sa swivel chair at nakakunot ang noong binuksan iyon. Nanginig ang kamay niya habang binabasa ang nakalahad sa loob noon. Her heart pounded fast.

It was a subpoena, and she was required to appear at the reopening of the case of Janus' mother, Ms. Jannah Valderama. Mas lalo pang lumala ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ni Kara nang dumapo ang kaniyang tingin sa signatory sa baba noon.

Signed by:

Janus Axl V. Ynares
City Prosecutor

Her heart pounded, and a gap formed between her lips.Hindi maproseso ng utak ang nakasulat sa papel na hawak niya. Ilang beses pa niyang ipinikit ang mata dahil baka lamang iyon sa sakit ng ulo niya saka muli iyong binasa ngunit walang pinagbago.

Ynares? Prosecutor? Reopening of the case? Puno ng tanong ang kaniyang mga mata habang napatulala nang ilang segundo. What the hell?

Wala sa sarili niyang kinuha ang cellphone sa bag at d-in-ial ang numero ni Oddity. Her head was filled with thousands of questions at alam niyang ang kuya lang niya ang makasasagot noon. After a few rings, Oddity answered.

"Hello?" Oddity on the other line. Natahimik siya, hindi pa nakababawi sa nalaman niya. "What is it, princess?" saka lang siya natauhan.

"He . . . He reopened his mother's case . . .," mahina niyang sinabi.

Rinig niyang humugot ng malalim na buntong na hininga si Oddity sa kabilang linya bago muling nagsalita, "So you already knew?"

"Alam mo?" balik niyang tanong.

"I helped him in some aspects. We filed the petition to reopen his mother's case."

Napapikit siya ng mata at naihilamos niya ang palad sa mukha. All this time her brother knew Janus' whereabouts! Akala niya ay wala itong kaalam-alam. Right! She should have knowb. It was Oddity! Kailangan nga ba ito nawalan ng pakialam sa kanila.

"How? He's a . . . ." Hindi niya maituloy ang nais bigkasin dahil hindi pa rin siya makapaniwala.

"He earned his juris doctor degree last year."

Napapikit siya at nagpakawala ng tipid na ngiti. Wala siyang mabitiwang salita sa Kuya Ei niya dahil hindi pa rin siya nakababawi sa pagkabigla. 'Does that mean he's in the Philippines, all this time?'

Nakaramdam si Kara ng luwag sa dibdib sa nalaman. Noon pa man ay alam niyang nais na nitong kumuha ng law para mabigyan ng hustisya ang pagkamatay ng kaniyang ina. She was happy for him. That proves that their parting apart wasn't only beneficial for her but also for him. She was so proud of who he is now.

"Are you going to the trial? Your father was detained in Mystown," kalaunang tanong ni Oddity.

"I will," tipid at determinadong niyang sagot.

It's time to face her demons. It's time to face that truth that even her mind chose to forget.

It's been years simula nang huli siyang tumapak sa bayan ng Mystown. Their company is now based in Manila and so as her work. Dahil sa pagiging busy dala ng trabaho, nalimitahan din ang oras niyang dumalaw sa kinagisnang probinsya.

"What the hell?" inis niyang singhal nang tumirik ang kaniyang sasakyan sa kahabaan ng highway patungong Mystown.

The hood of the car was smoking. Iniangat niya iyon at halos mapaubo dahil sa may hindi kakapalang usok. 'This is bad!' Bakit sa lahat ng oras, ngayon pa siya nasiraan? Ngayon pang kailangan niyang pumunta sa reopening ng kaso ng mama ni Janus.

"Damn!" Inis niyang sinipa ang gulong ng sasakyan at kinuha ang cellphone sa maliit na purse bag.

When she called her brother's phone number, he answered right away.

"Princess, where are you? The trial will begin in less than five minutes."

"Kuya, I'm stuck! My car broke in the middle of nowhere!" para siyang kuting na nawalan ng amo sa paraan ng pagsasalita niya.

"You want me to fetch you? Kaso baka hindi na natin maabutan 'yong trial." His brother's voice sounds conflicted.

Napakagat siya sa labi at napaisip. Kahit ilang taon silang hindi nagkita ni Janus, alam niya kung gaano kahalaga ang ang kasong iyon.And having someone like Oddity by his side to support him means a lot.

She was desperate to leave. She was curious to see how much he had changed. She was curious to see how he would handle his new job. She, on the other hand, does not want to be self-fish.

"No, Kuya. Stay. Janus needs you there. I'll just wait for a bus to come by."

Bagsak ang balikat siyang pumasok sa loob ng Volkswagen niya. Sinuot niya ang earphones saka ipinatong ang ulo sa steering wheel. She is hopeful that the trial will proceed smoothly without her.

She had been waiting for hours for a bus to Lennon to come by. Nang makasakay siya ay pinili niyang maupo sa dulong upuan sa pangalawa.

Oddity had already requested a tow truck and informed her that she may return to their home. The trial is over, and new evidence has been presented that will very certainly convict her father.

She never met her biological father after the tragedy, not even once. If she could go back in time, she could blame him for everything she's gone through. She did, however, learn to forgive him. She needs to, not because he is her father, but because she has to get out of the agony. And now that Janus has the authority to prosecute him, she will let justice do the rest.

Kara sat beside the window, staring out. She was greeted by a quick view of trees and houses as they passed by. A song from her playlist began to play. It was so familiar because she had heard it a thousand times before.

It was a song called 'Deep Sea' that Janus wrote for her. He claimed that when he quit the music industry, he had already written and produced the best song of his life. All of those songs were recorded for an album dedicated to her. 'Kassandra.'

Stillness.
Just the wind
and the ruffling of hair.

Napapikit siya nang marinig ang malamig na boses ni Janus na kumakanta. Above all of his songs, it was one of her favorites. Napamulat lamang siya nang sandaling huminto at bus dahil may sumakay.

She shifted her gaze outside the window once more. The sky had become crimson. It matched the peacefulness of the scarlet sun with the depth of delicate pink tones flowing from the sky's ends.

Nawala ang pokus ng atensyon ni Kara nang maramdaman niyang may naupo sa katabing upuan. She was still staring out the window, where the ocean water was reflecting the sky's colors, but her focus was on the person next to her.

Two pieces of life, staring at the horizon
At the vastness of this world
The blues above and below
The sand, the waves, the gulls.

Her neck shivered and her heart thumped fast when the person seated next to her took one pair of her earphone. Malakas ang pintig ng puso niya nang lingunin ito. Sinalubong siya ng pamilyar na mga mata. With the flaming light already began to reach the ocean, his eyes reflected all the colors in the sky.

And then the silence is broken, she says
'I love you'
I looked at her, smiled, and leaned my head
And waves splashed without warning.

No one dared to speak while they stared into each other's eyes. It was just too magnificent for her to be ignored. His eyes, which had once conveyed darkness and despair, now become peaceful. It had a glimmer of hope. They have an obscene amount of beauty that makes her want to drown.

It has been a long time since they last saw each other. Is it four or five years? She couldn't keep track. She wished to see those gorgeous eyes again, to see him again. But she never believed that she could feel that they were tied in this way. . . as if they were strings that had been entangled. . . as if they deserved a second chance.

Janus eventually spoke up. "Umh. . . Hi!" he said.

"Hi," she said, averting her gaze.

The butterflies in her stomach were too much for her to bear. Her hammering heart is uncontrollable.

Ramdam niyang isinuot ni Janus ang kapares ng earphone sa kabila nitong tainga. It made her feel magical to recall their first meeting on the bus to Lennon.

They're right there. They 're seated close to each other. Going to Lennon. Watching the sun goes down. At the right moment and in the right place.

In hushed tones, Janus asked, "Did you find him?"

She laughed softly and fidgeted with the jewelry on her right hand. "I didn't look for him because I believe he will look for me," she replied, casting a glance at him.

Janus' thin lips began to form a smile. His eyes were bright and cheerful, reflecting the tranquil surroundings behind her. He took her right hand in his and entwined their fingers slowly.

"You're right." He looked at the view outside the window. "That God offers us choices, we just have to be smart to choose," he said then looked at her again.

Sinupil nito ang buhok na humaharang sa mukha niya dala ng hangin. "Even though we weren't written in each other's choices, we still chose ourselves. We weren't brought together by chance." He gave a sincere smile. "Instead, God took a pen and rewrote our happy ending."

As they stared calmly and watched the sun slowly go away, Kara realized and appreciated the symbolism of the sunset in her life. Life is as simple and lovely as a sunset, but it is also delicate and precious.

She was reminded once more that she had to live her life the way she wanted since that is how it was intended to be. This is something she desires. She waited patiently and trusted in his assurances because she wanted them to have their own little infinity.

She was reminded that, absolutely, everything will be alright. She was granted the gift of light and breath every day, two things she never had to look for. Kara was grateful she didn't give up and kept picking up her pieces.

When the sun goes down, so does their wounded past, and with it comes a new chance to become a better person.

She was reminded that at the end of the day, we're always given the chance to start over again.

To live for another sunset.

- END