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Raph

Besides training, catching up reading his comics, and doting Spike, another one of Raph's favorite activities was to lay on his bed and stare up at the ceiling. When he was little he only did such an act out of pure boredom, but he soon learned that staring at the ceiling was strangely relaxing. It helped him focus about what was ahead and behind him much better than meditation ever did for him. It also gave him time to think. Plenty of time.

Some of his thoughts were composed of some of the most irrelevant stuff that had ever happened to him, and some of the other stuff was about the cobweb of chaos that had been strung recently. Most of it was overwhelming— Raph imagined it had to be more for others. And to think the only complicated hoop he had to jump through was getting through his junior year in one piece. Life was a bitch.

Talia. The Shredder. Mak. Casey. People who were now him and his family's concern for different reasons. One was under the Hamato Clan's protection; one was a problem that probably wouldn't go away anytime soon; one was an unfortunate witness; and one was. . . actually, Raph wasn't sure how 'he' was connected to this situation at all. Maybe there was no connection. Maybe Raph was overthinking it. It wasn't like Miwa was wrong— even if Casey wasn't looking for it, trouble somehow kept tabs on him. Especially when it came to women. It wasn't totally out of character for him to mess with some hotshot one night and then wake up the next morning with a whole shit of problems awaiting him.

Which was why Raph didn't understand why Leo wouldn't go along with his proposal. At least Raph could have a better understanding of how involved Casey was. It was better than sitting on his ass and waiting for a new lead to fall out from the sky.

Raph grew more frustrated just thinking about it. Uttering a sigh, he slipped a hand under his mattress, felt his fingers grab ahold of the familiar object, and brought it out to perch on his lap. It may have looked like a regular old leather book, but it was so much more than that: a space where he could express his emotions and opinions freely. A space he could come back to whenever he needed a moment of retreat from the real world. Inside was a treasure trove of feelings and secrets Raph never had the courage to admit to those who knew him— and quite possibly never would.

He unsnapped the diary and flipped to the next blank page awaiting for its writer to vent. Raph grew slightly disappointed that he was almost running out of pages to write in. And why wouldn't it be? Sometimes his diary was also his creativity hub— either writing down short stories or poems he drew inspiration from the world around him.

Before he could start, he hopped off the bed and quickly went to lock his door. Worst-case scenario would be somebody walking in and getting curious should they see him writing in a little leather book that beforehand to their knowledge had never existed.

Plucking a pen off his desk, he sat back down on his bed, and brought the pen down. There was no outline or planning ahead. He only jotted down whatever came to his mind first and let the rest fall into place:

Oct. 18th, 2016

Where do I begin, dear diary? For starters, I wish I knew what the hell was going on. As you know, so many crazy things have happened this past month and a half, given the last entries. But this one is different. This is about how my best friend was somewhere where he wasn't supposed to be. This is about not hearing from him in SIX. FUCKING. MONTHS and on the night we're supposed to give Shredder a run for his money, Casey happens to show up with criminals. Could he be in some kind of trouble? Did it all start those six months ago? Whatever the reason is, you betcha I'm gonna find out. No matter what Leo says, I have to make contact with Casey. If he's been around them for that long, maybe he could pass on some valuable intel. I could kill two birds with one stone. I could give my family and I the head start we've been needing.

***

Trying to locate Casey first was apparently the hard part. He moved out of his father's house after he was accepted into university and lived somewhere on campus (and he wasn't about to give a call to either Mr. Jones or the Dean, knowing he would hit a wall at both), and Raph didn't know where he worked. Raph was about to consider giving Casey a call just for, you know, old times' sake, but then he decided against it. Even if Casey did answer he would just lie, anyway.

Checking social media was a bust, too. Although Raph knew Casey had an impulse to show off anything of everything online, the last post was around the time Casey went MIA. Raph must've scrolled through hundreds and hundreds of photos and not one gave an indicator as to where he could be employed.

Raph flopped back against the bed. You'd think this man wouldn't miss the opportunity to upload a photo of his workplace and brag. Now his best bet was to try his university. Some posts on his Facebook page gave as to some clue of his possible location, but the angles they were taken at didn't leave much room for confidence. What now, would he have to go check each and every one of Casey's Facebook friends and cross-examine every photo? Ugh, why couldn't there be a mutual friend or something so Raph wouldn't waste his time—

"Oh my god," Raph realized, shooting straight back up. Why didn't he think of that before?

Raph quickly ran out from his room and lunged for the bedroom door across from him, knocking in a rushed pace. Wouldn't want to barge in on her if she was getting undressed or anything like that. The door then opened, his sister standing in the doorway.

"Um, hello?"

"Hi." Raph looked over her shoulder. "You busy?"

"Not really, but—"

"Cool." He let himself in. He thought he heard Miwa mutter something, but he didn't give it too much thought.

Raph gave Miwa's room a once-over. There was her bed that hadn't been slept in, the cobwebs that formed on her bedposts and floor corners, and her books and CD albums that had collected enough dust and lint to create a 'dust bunny' since they hadn't been touched since the day she left for university. He then noticed what looked like a strap sticking out from under the bed. When he bent down and pulled on it, he thought he was imagining things when something big, ugly, and brown crawled scurried out.

But no. He wasn't. Raph made something like a strangled noise from the back of his throat. He grabbed the music-decorated paddle given to Miwa by Mikey on her birthday and battered it on the disgusting vermin of the earth so hard he thought he was going to tear a hole through the wooden floor.

"Damn, Raph!" Miwa stopped him. "I think you got it!"

Raph considered it, but he gave one last bash to make sure. "Fucking roach," he grunted, tossing the paddle aside and dusted his hands. "The only creature unworthy of any sympathy on this planet."

"An animal rights' activist would disagree with you."

"You kidding me? They're vile creatures and they can eat me," Raph declared, shuddering. He may have exaggerated on that last part, but nothing changed his mind that cockroaches were the bane of his— and pretty much every other person who thought God was crazy for creating cockroaches in the first place— existence.

Miwa looked over at her paddle like she couldn't decide whether to still keep it or not. "Now that we're roach-free," she started, hopping on her bed, "what'd you come here for?"

"Just to talk." Raph tried to play it casual. He actually picked up the strap, which turned out was attached to a lint-covered electric piano keyboard. He instantly recognized it. "Hey, isn't this your guitar-key thingamajig? The one you always played with as a kid?"

Miwa's head popped up from her pillow. "You mean my key-tar?" She glanced at it. "Ah, that thing. Yep."

The memories were coming back. When their parents gifted Miwa the key-tar for Christmas to indulge in her music passion, what started out as a blessing quickly became an annoyance as Miwa played that thing no matter where she was. At the dinner table? Check. In the dojo? Check? While she was having a bubble bath? Check. It didn't help that it also came with a microphone, so guess who decided to sing like she was the next Mariah Carey?

"My God, how many times did you sing 'Obessed'?" Raph winced. "You really outdid the shit out of me and Leo's eardrums."

"I think I did Mariah justice. Do you think I did Mariah justice?"

"I think a dying cat could've done it better."

"Can't you at least pretend I had some potential back then?"

"If I did, wouldn't you have been the lead singer in your band back in high school?"

Miwa laughed. "Ha! You're a dick."

"Thanks. You're like the twenty-seventh person to tell me that."

"Which means there's something wrong with you."

Raph shrugged. "Maybe. Sometimes it's because they can't handle the truth."

"You know that's going to haunt you later, right?"

"What is?"

"That bluntness of yours. One day you're going to say something you shouldn't have said and it's going to leave you in your feelings."

"Like what?"

"I dunno. But you will get bitten in the ass, that's for sure."

Raph frowned. What could be so bad about being so straight-forward? "So far, my ass is unmarked."

"For now, Raphie. For now."

Raph rolled his eyes. "Anyways, I need a favor."

Miwa snorted. "You needing help? That's a new one."

"Laugh all you want, but this is important."

"So important that you had to come to me? Let me guess: it's about Casey?"

Raph's silence confirmed it. Miwa plugged in her earbuds. "Thought so. What do you want to ask?"

"You and him attend the same university," Raph explained. "I thought maybe. . . you could find out where he lives for me."

Miwa crossed her arms behind her head, propping her leg up on one knee. "You're not seriously going against Leo's orders of showing up at Casey's place and questioning him in your ninja suit, are you?"

Once again, silent. Miwa unfurled from her position and turned to stare at Raph in a marveled manner. "Oh, shit," she tittered. She unclipped her hair that was put up in a messy bun."You really are, huh?"

Raph tilted his head. What did that mean? Was this even a good idea at all? "Will you tell if I say yes?"

Miwa's face turned neutral. She went back to her position, facing away from Raph. This made Raph a little nervous until Miwa said, "What makes you think I'll tell?"

"Because an older sister is normally supposed to be opposed to the little brother's potentially risky ideas?" Raph said it like it was a question.

"Yeah, but when has that ever stopped the little brother from doing it anyway?"

"Besides Donnie, I would think you're more prone to not go against Leo's wishes."

"I don't have to tell Leo anything. In reality, I really don't care if you want to talk to Casey or not. Do it and your dilemma will be put to rest; if you don't, then you'll never find out."

Raph drew up a brow. He really wasn't expecting Miwa to be this nonchalant towards the situation, but if he thought about it, when had she ever displayed a sense of responsibility? Uptightness? For being the oldest child, Miwa didn't seem to 'act' like the oldest child. It really seemed like throughout his life that the only person who tried their hardest to be a good role model was Leo; when Donnie became part of the family, he became the second prominent one. But what about Miwa? He wasn't saying his sister was a 'bad influence' so to say, but she didn't possess characteristics that made Raph feel like Miwa was in no rush to prove to her younger siblings that they should follow in her footsteps.

Huh. If Nee-Chan was self-aware of that, anyway.

"So. . . does that mean you'll help me?" Raph said, a little hopeful.

"Sure. It's cool," Miwa affirmed. "It's not like our paths ever crossed, but I know people of people who know Casey. I'll ask around."

At least he would be getting somewhere. "Thanks," he breathed. Now there was no reason to stay here.

Miwa's voice calling his name froze his tracks midway. Raph turned his head. She now had her legs up the wall, almost as if she were about to commence a yoga session. She didn't say a word for a few moments. Okay, Raph thought. She must've changed her mind—

"Maybe it's nothing," she suggested. "Maybe he's not involved in all of this. You've got nothing to worry about."

Raph downturned his lips. Even if Casey had no knowledge of The Foot and Genesis and the drug operation, that still didn't answer why he was with members of the Russian Mob. Was it through coercion? Or something far more darker than he expected?

That's what he hated about the word 'maybe'. It meant nothing and everything at the same time. The worst part? You wouldn't know which it would be.