Harry angrily lugged his trunk behind him, until he found himself on Magnolia Crescent. He looked around in the dark alley and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Gods," he muttered. "I'm so dead."

Think! The little voice in his head yelled. Remember Percy? He went on an epic death quest when he was 12! You're 13! You can at least find a way to contact them.

We have no muggle money or drachmas, the other voice in his head argued. Do you have a suggestion for getting out of this?

Use Hedwig, duh.

Hedwig is at Ron's!

Well, figure it out! You're a wizard, Harry!

We can't do magic outside of school-- look where it's gotten us!

"Both of you, shut up" Harry said harshly and loudly, causing a few crows to take flight. But the annoying voices in his head gave him an idea. Surely, if he was already expelled from Hogwarts, surely a little more magic wouldn't hurt?

Just as he had reached for his trunk, a prickling sensation appeared on the back of his neck. Harry spun around, wand ready, but there was no sign of movement. Harry didn't lower his wand-- enough time spent around Percy taught him to never assume he was safe.

"Lumos", he muttered, and the spotlight that shot from his wand almost blinded him. But at least he could see. He spun his wand around, looking for any danger, when suddenly it aimed at a figure heading towards him.

"Oh my gods, Hazel!" Harry lowered his wand and placed a hand on his rapidly beating heart. "What are you doing here?"

Hazel stepped out into the moonlight, illuminating her face. "Well, you see, I've been practicing shadow travel, and well, now I'm here, I guess."

"A little warning, next time, maybe?" Harry asked, his heart calming down. "How long have you been standing there?"

"I literally just appeared right before you swung your wand at me," she answered. "Why do you have that thing out, though?"

"I felt something..." Harry said, glancing around again. "Like something was watching me."

Hazel was instantly alert, her hand drawing near her hip where Harry knew her Cavalry sword was concealed. "A presence?" she asked sharply.

"Yeah--" Harry cast his wand light around the alley again, when it caught on another shadowy thing watching him with dark, hollow eyes (Harry at first thought it was Nico, then realized it was too low near the ground), he let out a yelp and stumbled backwards-- tripped over the curb-- there was a shout as Hazel spotted the Nico-creature and drew her sword-- Harry fell backwards and threw his arm out to catch himself-- the Nico-creature slipped away into the shadows as there was a low rumble sound-- two bright spotlights aimed down on him-- when suddenly everything stopped.

"Harry, what the--" Hazel was staring at the massive vehicle in front of them and helped him to his feet. "Did you just... create a bus with your wand?"

Harry stumbled to his feet and stared at the triple-decker, bright purple bus that had materialized where they'd just stood. Inscribed on the windshield were the words The Knight Bus.

"It's like the Camp Jupiter version of Argus' van" Harry heard Hazel mutter next to him. "Grander, more furnished, and purple and gold."

Harry vaguely wondered who Argus was, but got distracted by a conductor in a purple uniform who had leapt out of the bust and begun to speak loudly to the night.

"Welcome to the Knight Bus, emergency transportation for the stranded witch or wizard. Just stick out your wand hand, step on board, and we can take you anywhere you want to go. My name is Stan Shunpike, and I will be your conductor this eve-" He suddenly stopped and looked down at Hazel, with her sword out pointed directly at the bus and had forgotten to lower the weapon.

"Blimey," Stan said, dropping all formal manner. "That all gold?"

"That's not important" Hazel said, sheathing the sword. "Stan Shunpike-- Mr. Shunpike, you said this can take us anywhere we want to go?"

"Anywhere on land" Stan said proudly. "Can't go underwater yet... you did flag us down, dincha? Stuck out yer wand 'and, dincha?"

"Yes" Hazel said quickly.

"How much would it be to get to London?" Harry asked.

"Eleven sickles each" Stan said, "But for firteen you get 'ot chocolate, and for fifteen you get an 'ot water bottle an' a toofbrush in the color of your choice."

"I got it" Harry muttered as he dug through his trunk, pulling out his moneybag.

Hazel opened her mouth to protest, then shut it and boarded the train as Harry pressed the money into Stan's sweaty palms.

"Say, you two, what's your names?" Stan whisper/asked as they lugged Harry's trunks onto the bus. Hazel glanced at Harry.

"Hazel Levesque" Hazel said, shooting a warning glance at Harry. It was clearer than a telepathic communication- don't use your real name. Not that Harry would have anyways.

"I'm... Neville Longbottom" Harry stammered, trying to ignore Hazel's silent facepalm from behind Stan.

"Nice to meet you, Hazel, Neville. These are your beds," Stan pulled Harry's trunk to under a bed near the door. "This is our driver, Ernie Prang. Ern, this is 'azel Levesk and Neville Longbottom. Take 'er away, Ern." (How do you pronounce Levesque? It's different for everyone.)

There was a loud BANG, and suddenly Harry was thrown to his back on the bed. He struggled to his feet, trying to ignore the lurching feeling in his stomach. Over in the bed next to him, Hazel was standing on the floor without any disorientation. "This is smooth, compared to the Argo II," she explained at Harry's queasy and questioning look.

"This is where we was before you flagged us down" Stan said happily. "Where are we, Ern? Somewhere in Wales?"

"Ar," said Ernie.

"How come the Muggles don't hear the bus?" Harry asked.

"Them?" Stan sniffed pompously, much like Percy Weasley. "Don' listen properly, do they? Don' look properly either. Never notice nuffink, they don'."

"The Mist" Hazel summed up. Stan frowned.

"Mist? No mist 'ere, it's summer. No nuffink covering them eyes neither. Muggles don' notice stuff like this."

"Best go wake up Madam Marsh, Stan" Ern said. "We'll be in Abergavenny in a minute."

Stan passed their beds and disappeared up a narrow wooden staircase.

"Did he really pass his driver's lesson?" Hazel muttered to Harry.

"I doubt that," Harry responded, watching out the window as mailboxes, powerlines, and trash cans leapt out of their way, hopping back into place once they passed.

"'Ere you go, Madam Marsh" Stan said. Ernie slammed his foot on the brakes and the beds slid a foot or so toward the front of the bus. Madam Marsh clamped a handkerchief to her mouth and tottered down the steps. Stan threw out her luggage with a cheerful wave, and then they were off again, zipping through a forest, trees jumping left and right out of the way.

Hazel settled to casually polish her long, deadly sharp cavalry sword as passengers began getting off. Eventually, they were the only two left.

"A'right, then, 'azel, Neville, where to in London?" Stan asked after throwing Baron Ludwig's bags out the door.

"Er... Diagon Alley" Harry responded.

Hazel gave a little start, as if just remembering where they were. "Oh, Ha- Neville, I've been meaning to ask you-- what the heck are you doing?"

Harry recalled the Aunt Marge's visit, and internally laughed. "Well, you see, I blew up my aunt?"

Hazel sheathed her sword, raising an eyebrow. "You blew up your aunt? As in like, auntie go boom?"

Harry laughed. "No, as in like inflated," he said quietly, remembering Stan. "I'm not quite sure what happened, but I'm pretty sure I'm expelled."

"Why didn't you just contact us?" Hazel asked as the bus gave another mighty lurch.

Harry shook his head. "Hedwig's at the Burrow and I don't have any drachmas. And if I did, I'm not sure if Iris messages work for me. I'm not a demigod, remember?"

"Right." Hazel looked thoughtful. "Why Diagon Alley, though?"

"Like I said, I'm pretty sure I'm expelled. The Dursleys kicked me out, they're my only family. I guess, I dunno the idea seems pretty dumb now, but I was going to get the rest of my money from Gringotts and, uh, 'live my life as an outcast'?"

Hazel face palmed. "That was your brilliant plan? We can figure it out later, it's late. I'll IM Annabeth in the morning, I guess."

Harry looked outside, at the many shadows zooming past the window. "Can't you just shadow-travel? Actually, why don't you just shadow-travel us to the Burrow?"

Hazel shook her head. "I don't have enough strength. You might not have noticed it, but I was fighting for consciousness before the bus came. And to teleport the both of us, and your luggage?" she shook her head again. "We'd be lost in the shadows, floating in oblivion forever. I doubt our souls will even find a way to the Underworld."

Harry gulped. "Yeah, we'll stick with this."

The bus stopped suddenly, throwing the beds again.

"'Ere you go, Neville an' 'azel!" Stan would've chucked Harry's luggage out the door had Hazel not grabbed it first with a warning look. "Diagon Alley!"

The doors soundlessly slid open, only to reveal the Prime Minister, Cornelius Fudge.

"Damnant", Hazel muttered in Latin.