"You what?" she asks shocked. I back away a bit. I did not expect that reaction. I thought she'd be happy about it... "I have a job," I say in a defending tone. "Why?" she asks confused and I look at her dissapointed. "I don't have the time and nerves to argue with you about my decisions. Because I need to change and then go to work... Pizza is ordered and I'll be back at one a.m." I say and walk into the backyard, take my dress and rush past her.

I lock the bathroom door behind me and hear Jessica knock more than just once. I make myself ready and look at the clock. Still an ahour to go but I can't stay longer. I am afraid of the confrontation that is still ahead of me. I can't avoid Jessica for ever.

I slowly unlock the door and get out of the bathroom. Jessica is sitting on the stairs, opposit of me, head in hands. She slowly looks up and sees me. I nervously rub my arm and she just looks at me, tears in her eyes.

"You look beautiful," she says in a shaky voice. I know she has cried and I am the reason why. I am an idiot... I slowly walk over to her and hug her close. "Thank you," I say and kiss her lips softly.

"I am sorry," she says and I shake my head. "You don't need to be," I say and rub her arm, comforting her. "You know I am happy for you. I just am afraid that I'll lose you. I guess I am just too overprotective..." she says and I kiss her again. "You will never ever lose me Jessica," I say and she nods.

"I need to go now. We'll talk tomorrow," I say and kiss her one last time before leaving her. I feel bad for leaving her in this state but I need to get out of there. I need my space. I need to get along with myself before we can add another person.

I call a cab and am driven to the bar. I slowly enter and Leon smiles at me. "Hey barby," he says and I smile back. "Hey," I say. "So what am I supposed to do tonight?" I ask and he laughs. "Sing whatever you want just talk about your song choice with your new band first..." he says and points at the guys, building up their instruments.

"My band?" I ask and he nods. "This is our band and you are our singer. They will do everything you tell them to," he says and I nod. I walk over to them. They smile at me. "So you are barby?" They ask and I laugh.

"It's Nella, short for Fenella," I say and smile at them. "Mar sin, tá tú na hÉireann?" the guy at the piano asks and I smile. "Yeah, how did you know that?" I ask and everybody else looks at us confused. "What did you ask her?" the guy at the guitar asks. "I asked her if she is irish," the pianist says.

"I am Lukas, the guy with the guitar is Mark, the guy at the drums is Thomas and the idiot at the bass is Maks," he says and I smile. "Nice to meet you," I say and smile sweetly. "So Leon told me you can bring people to tears?" Lukas asks and I nod.

"Well let's say I get very emotional during singing and that influids my singing a lot," I say and they nod. "Well I am glad you are here because Maks can't sing for the sake of his life," Mark says and I laugh. "I bet he isn't that bad. Maybe we can sing a duet?" I say and he just shakes his head. "Better not.... I am terrible," he says and I laugh softly.

"We better begin or I'll need to stay longer and my girlfriend will probably wait for me so... not a good idea," I say and they look at me surprised. "Girlfriend?" Maks asks and smirks. "Yeah, I am not into boys so sorry. There won't be any band affaires," I say Lukas smiles. "Don't worry. I secretly think all of them are gay anyways," he says and Maks hits him.

"We are not gay," Mark says and I laugh. "I don't care if you are gay or not. I like you already," I say and begin to warm up my voice.

...

I finally arrive back home and exhale loudly. It was so much fun! For the first time in so long I have felt alive again. "You are late," Jessica says and I see in her eyes that she must have been crying again.

I walk over to her and hug her. "You are still up? I am sorry it was so much fun that we lost track of time and just continued..." I say and she sighs. "You didn't tell me what your new job is," she says and smiles weakly.

"Oh, I am sorry. I got a job as singer in one of the bars in town. They are all so much fun! And the pianist, Lukas, is irish so we talk non-stop in irish, driving the rest of the band crazy," I say and smile widely.

"I am glad you are happy," she says and I know there is something she doesn't tell me. She kisses my lips softly and takes my hand in hers. "I guess you won't come to set with me today, will you?" she asks and I shake my head softly.

"I am sorry but I am so tired, all I want to do is sleep," I say and she stares at the ground before she turns around and walks up the stairs. Shit, I think I made her sad now. Great job. I promised... I feel so uncomfortable going back to set.

This was the best and at the same time worst time of the last thre years. "Jessica wait," I say and grab her hand. She turns around, hope in her eyes. "I'll come an hour or so later than you," I say and she smiles at me. "Thank you," she says and kisses me softly.