She sat on her bed feeling all sorts of pain in her chest. She tightly squeezed the soft pillow as she let the tears roll down her eyes. He is not worth it! He is not worth it! She had no-one standing by her side. She never told Aydah and Mahmud was still at the hospital. "Why?" She questioned as she looked at the off white pillow. She let a soft giggle escape. She was asking a pillow why her life was so miserable. She caressed its cotton cover and laid down on the bed. She rocked herself back and forth as she tried to forget everything about him which was not possible. She was still in love with him. Someone might think she's sick in the head when she tells them she'd give him a second chance if he comes back. She believed he was only angry that is why he did what he did. But his eyes showed so much seriousness and his words sounded true to her ears and hurtful to her heart.

Just six days ago she was with Mahmud, playing 'would you rather' but now she was at home; Heartbroken, depressed, downhearted, dejected and melancholy. Everyone thought she fainted because of stress from work. Mahmud was at the hospital wondering why she wasn't back when he woke up from his nap. He hoped nothing happened to her.

After a week, he got discharged but he still had a cast on. "I need you to do me a favor Aydah," he said while they were on their way home. "Can you take me to Manha's place before we go home? Please," he pleaded. Between her brothers, he was her favorite. He's always polite and asks for anything nicely unlike the king of the house, Mujahid. "But Yaya, aren't you tired now?"

"Why don't we go home and you freshen up first then later in the evening I'll take you," she spoke while her eyes were fixed on the road. "No, Aydah. I don't want Umma to know. If we go back home now she will never allow me to go anywhere," he explained. She sighed and nodded. They got to the house and headed in. It took Aydah more than 15 minutes to convince her to go talk to Mahmud.

The moment their eyes met, he could tell there was something wrong with his girl. He heaved a sigh and told Aydah to give them a minute. "You told me to take a nap, you'd be back in a minute but you just left me. I woke up and you weren't. I always wake up and see you by my side."

She shook her head, painful tears rolling down her red cheeks. He had never seen Maryam sit like that, so deflated. Her loose shoulders shook, her hands hanging low, making no attempt to conceal or even wipe away her own tears. Aside from her reddened face she was so grey looking and her hair was as dishevelled as the park under fall leaves. He had seen others cry like that and in every case it was a transition from a person with hope to one without. It was how he cried when he lost his mother. It's a kind of crying that shows the child underneath, that the hurt has cut right back through the protective layers acquired in matu.

She sniffed, trying to control her tears but it was avail. "I'm sorry," she apologized smiling, she couldn't look him in the eye that time. "I didn't even know what happened to me but all I could remember was your brother telling me he was using me."

He wasn't surprised about what Mujahid did. He couldn't interfere because their friendship would've ended and he wouldn't want that to happen. "Manha, look, I'm truly deeply sorry about what my brother did. I...." he trailed off and sighed. "No problem in your life is here to stay forever. Everything passes with time, just like your happy days were driven into the past, all your sorrows also will soon disappear and make way for new happy moments to seem in. I know it hurts to lose someone you love when you're not ready, it's painful, it hurts, you'd feel like the most unlucky person in the world but don't forget; you have loved ones. You have people that care about you. I'll always be with you no matter what, I promise."

For once in days, she felt a little bit okay. She had a little bit of Hope now. "Just try and delete everything about him. Delete him from your life and move on, you can do it," he assured her. "Sure I can delete his pictures, I can delete his number and texts. But, how can I delete his face and his voice and our memories. Mahmud I'm not going to lie to you, I want him back and I also want to get over him but neither are happening."

Mahmud rested his head in his uninjured hand, controlling his anger. "Auzubillahi minash shaidanir rajeem," he mused to himself. "I know you must think I'm stupid or something," she chuckled nervously. He looked at her for a while she started at the blank space. She was out of her mind. She had lost it. She didn't know what to do. She needed someone to be with her. He stared at her, speechless. She was obviously deeply in love with Mujahid and no matter what she wasn't going to let go of him.

"Okay look Maryam, can you do as I say?" He asks. She nodded still not meeting his eyes. "Why don't we go on a vacation? Go far away from all this chaos. You, me and Aydah. Would you like that?" She briskly looked at him and her eyes sparkled. Her lips lifted and her heart was slowly coming into pieces again. "Really? You'd do that for me?" She smiled, biting her lip. "But what about your arm?" She asked worriedly. "Don't worry, I'll manage like that, so I'll talk to one of my friends by next week or two we would leave."

"Where are we going to?" She questioned excitedly. He slowly stood up, "it will be a surprise." He winked. She felt the urge to hug him. She stared at him with so much love. There was an explosion in her brain... the good sort... the type that carries more possibilities than she could be conscious of... but there were hundreds of ideas there in that buzz of electricity... she could feel it. It was the calling card of adventure, of paths awaiting her feet. Whatever was ahead could be a great challenge, and there could be tears, but it was her adventure to take and so she smiled. The ideas would come, probably when she least expected it, so she laced her boots and took a step.

Even after they left, He pleaded with Aydah to go stay with Maryam while he talked to his parents about their trip. His father wasn't in town so he had no problem with him. That same day in the night, Aydah was already at Maryam's place. He entered Ummah's room. His baby sister, Intisar was fast asleep on Ummah's bed. His hand was fast healing, Alhamdulillah. She looked at him smiling, "Mahmud. I thought you've slept already. How's your arm?" She asks with so much concern. He smiled and his heart warmed up. He was beyond happy with how much she showed them love even after their mother's demise and even when their father wasn't around.

"Alhamdulillah Ummah, it's healing pretty fast." He replied observing the hand.

"Masha Allah. Have you eaten? Do you need anything?" She asked sitting down on her bed. "Ummah I've eaten.... well I wanted to talk to you about something."

She looked at him waiting to hear what he has to say. "I was thinking of taking Aydah and Maryam on vacation for two weeks," he said in a low voice, scratching the back of his head. "Really? But why just the two of them? Why don't you wait till Fadila and the rest finish their exams and you all go, including Mujahid if he wishes to join you."

"No Ummah, I have a reason for doing that. You know there was something between Maryam and Mujahid so they.... well they're not together and she has been downhearted and I wanted to...." he suddenly felt embarrassed about it. Ummah chuckled softly. "Okay I understand you but please I'm begging you, take care of them and make sure nothing happens to them. They're both your sisters and whatever happens to them, you will be responsible for everything."

He nodded his head slowly. "I promise Ummah, I'll take good care of them and be responsible." He promised. "May Allah bless you all for us and protect you. May Allah fulfill your favors and wishes. You should go and get some rest, we'll talk about it tomorrow."

He thanked her before saying good night and leaving.

••

"Capt, I am telling you this is the perfect time to propose to her. Don't waste time dating, just marry her before someone takes her away." His trusted friend, Ahmad advised him. Mahmud smiled and shook his head. "No Ahmad. Maryam is not in good shape now, it will not be right for me to just speak up and tell her what's on my mind. She might think I did everything on purpose to break them apart. And oh geez Ahmad she's still in love with my dumb brother."

Ahmad laughed and tapped Mahmud on his shoulder. "Capt, you then make her forget about him. That girl has suffered enough. She needs someone that will make her happy and makes her feel special. And you're that person to do that. No guy will love Maryam like you would do. So man up and tell her how you feel about her. She might even be into you too because common you guys have been together for years and not to even talk about your good looks."

"Ahmad I only came here to make arrangements for me and the girls. I need a private jet," he changed the topic. "We're still not done talking about it but, Umm don't worry, I can be able to make arrangements for you next week Thursday."

Mahmud thanked him before leaving the airport. He couldn't wait to see her reaction when she finds out they're going to her dream city. The driver took him straight home because he still wasn't strong enough to be going out alone. Ummah was in the living room alone watching TV. His sister's were in school. "Ummah," he called out sitting beside her. "I've finished making arrangements for the trip." He informed. "That's good so where are you taking them?" She asked smiling at him. She was happy to see him smiling once again.

Mujahid stood close to the door listening to every single thing they were saying. "I'm taking them to Maryam's favorite place. She always wanted to go to Bora Bora. So I decided to surprise her. I hope she loves it." He sighed softly. Ummah touched his head. "You're such a nice and loving person, Mahmud. Allah ya maka albarka. Your mother is such a lucky woman to have you as a son. I am also lucky. And I trust you that's why I'm giving you permission for this. Please do what is right."

Mahmud smiled sheepishly and nodded. "Thank you Ummah. I will never let you guys down In sha Allah."

"So I hope you're going to propose to her because I can't wait to see you get married to the love of your life, Maryam." Mahmud laughed. "Ummah, just keep praying for me."

Mujahid rubbed his hands together in that classic way villains do, he wasn't about to pretend to be anything other than what he was. He enjoyed it, to him making ladies fall for him and breaking their hearts afterwards was only a game. He quietly walked away and headed out of the house. He was going to let his brother get her. Not on his watch. At least when he was done using her. Maryam was nothing but a dumb toy he enjoys playing with.

He entered his car and headed straight to Maryam's place. He knew she'd take him back without any problems. Even when she wasn't going to take him back he was at least going to ruin things for his brother. He laughed evilly when he thought of her and what he planned to do after getting her back. He parked the car in the parking spot and headed in. Two rings and the door was opened by one their maids.

It was still morning. Maryam was just having her breakfast together with Aydah. He heard them talking about their trip and smirked. His hand in his suit pocket as he gently walked to the dining room. "So I heard you guys are going on a trip." The girls looked at him and Maryam choked on her food. Aydah helped her with water till she stopped coughing.

He glared at Aydah, meaning she should leave the place but she looked away. "I swear I'll slap you if you don't leave this place right now Aydah!" He angrily spoke. Without reponding, she left the dining room.

Maryam sent daggers his way but he didn't give a damn. He smiled softly at her and moved closer. "Let's talk please."