Chapter Nine:
Realizations

Another bright flash of light blinded me but I continued to follow the creeper. When my vision cleared, I scanned my surroundings and noticed that I was in Austin this time.

"Why are we here?" I asked the creeper.

"Remember when you used to think about what your future was like?" The creeper asked me.

I thought for a moment and smiled when I remembered the crazy fantasy's I'd make up for myself. I was always with Michael in them.

The creeper led me towards a huge house. There was a porch that encircles the front door. The landscaping at the front was immaculate, heavy with colorful flowers and perfectly trimmed hedges. The creeper led me inside and into a living room as I gazed around inside it.

It was huge and absolutely breathtaking. A couch and numerous chairs surrounded a huge tv that had numerous gaming consoles hooked up to it.

But that wasn't what made me nearly burst into tears.

In the living room were an older version of Michael and I. We were probably in our mid thirties. Michael sat on the couch with a little boy sitting in his lap. He had brown red hair, like Michael, and blue eyes. He had pale skin and freckles, the same that I absolutely adored on Michael.

I sat on the floor, clapping my hands and smiling at a little girl. Encouraging her to step forward towards me. She had very little hair, but I could tell it was going to be brown-blonde like mine. She had hazel eyes that gleamed with determination as she took a shaky step towards me. All at once she took several more and I scooped her into my arms and started crying with happiness.

Michael was smiling and he set the little boy on the floor so he could wrap his arms around both me and the little girl. The little boy squirmed his way into Michael's lap and Michael scooped him up and let him join the group hug. I kissed both their heads and then stared into Michael's eyes.

"We are the perfect family, aren't we?" I asked him. Michael smiled and nodded before kissing me gently on the lips.

The tears finally escaped my eyes as I realized how much I longed for this future. The perfect life that I always dreamed of having. With Michael and I married and having two kids. It was so surreal that I felt if I touched it, it'd shatter into a million pieces.

The creeper hissed and the bright flash happened again. I closed my eyes and let the remaining tears spill over my cheeks. When I opened my eyes again, I saw a younger version of Michael and I. I looked almost exactly the same as I did now. Michael looking the same too except for one thing.

He looked incredibly skinny and ill. His eyes sunken and skin a freakish ashen pale color. He honestly looked like he was dying.

I saw tears begin to pour out of my eyes and Michael looked at me like he was trying to reason with me. I just shook my head and looked away as tears continued to pour from my eyes.

I watched this for about five minutes before Michael looked down and said something.

"But over time, I realized I do actually love you. And that I was wrong to do that, Gavin. I want you in my life and I want to be there when you make that first real smile that you haven't made in a year. Nothing could ever change what I did, but maybe if you can just find it in your tortured and broken little heart to forgive a douche like me, I promise I will try my hardest to make all your dreams come true," Michael told me in the most sincere voice.

It took a minute but I looked up into Michael's sunken eyes and I smiled.

But it wasn't just any fake smile that I've been making lately.

It was genuine. A genuine, Gavin Free smile. And as I looked in Michael's sunken eyes, I could see he knew it.

As I leaned forward and hugged him a thought bubbled in my own mind.

And for the first time in a while... I was happy.

The bright flash happened and I nearly screamed. What happened next? Did I forgive him or not?

"Wait! Did I forgive him?" I yelled. The creeper gave me a dead look.

"That's for you to find out. Not me," The creeper hissed.

I rolled my eyes and sulked down. What the hell was that all about? What was Michael talking about? And why did he look so ill?
I didn't get a chance to answer these questions when the bright flash blinded me once again. I closed my eyes against the bright light and waited for the creeper to lead me to the next memory or whatever.

But I just found myself in the strange dark room that I was in when this whole thing started. The creeper walked closer to me and cocked its head at me.

"What is on your thoughts?" The creeper asked me. I shrugged and looked down.

"Everything. What isn't in my thoughts, ya know?" I muttered. The creeper hissed in amusement and nodded.

"Gavin, you do realize that your depression isn't just affecting you, but everyone around you, correct?" The creeper asked me. I nodded and sighed.

"Well, have you ever wondered what would happen if you succeed in your constant suicide attempts?" The creeper asked.

Not a day goes by that I don't wonder what would happen if I succeed in committing suicide. What would happen to the Achievement Hunters? What would happen to Achievement Hunter as a whole? I was a fan favorite, so if I just disappeared what would the fans think? Would they still watch?

"I'm gonna show you something, Gavin. I want you to think about it when I show you it, okay?" The creeper hissed. I nodded and he led me through the wooden door again.

It was the Achievement Hunter office. All the guys sat at there desks, staring at one particular spot. I looked over to what they were looking at, noticing it was my empty and deserted desk.

All the guys were crying. Ryan, Jack, Geoff.

Well, almost all the guys.

Michael just stared blankly at my desk. His expression gave away nothing and he wrung his hands out repeatedly, getting more forceful after each wring. I noticed that his nails were chewed off and looked as though they had been bleeding before. He looked extremely pale and skinny but he continued to just stare at my desk like everyone else.

Geoff eventually stood up and placed a hand on Michael's shoulder. Michael didn't react to it, just continued to stare at my desk.

"Michael, it isn't healthy to keep your emotions in like this," Geoff told him.

"Yeah, Michael. Gavin wouldn't have wanted you to act like this," Ryan joined in, standing beside Geoff.

"We all know you want to cry. We won't judge. Hell, we've been crying like babies since we heard the news," Jack told him, placing his hand on Michael's other shoulder.

"I can't," Michael rasped out.

"Why not? Everyone can cry, Mi-," Geoff started.

"No, Geoff, you don't understand. I've tried. I just can't bring myself to cry," Michael told them. His voice sounded so cracked and broken.

Geoff, Jack, and Ryan just shook their heads and sat back down, resuming their crying fits.

Bright flash.

I was back in the dark room.

"What happened to them?" I croaked.

"Well, Geoff started to drink again and he was taken to the hospital numerous times for alcohol poisoning. Ryan ended up murdering his entire family and being taken to a mental hospital. (AN: I'm sorry! I couldn't help it!) Jack turned bitter and he would scream at anyone who got on his nerves. The fans, which I know you were wondering about, stopped watching snd I believe a couple even committed suicide with you," The creeper told me.

"And Michael?" I asked cautiously.

The creeper looked down for a moment before giving me a sad look (Again, I don't know how he did it) before leading me through the door again.

I was at Michael's apartment. It was dark but I could vaguely make out a dark figure on the couch.

It was Michael, turning a gun over and over in his hands. I counted twenty times that he turned the gun over before he stopped and took a deep breath. Michael looked up, setting the gun down, and took a large swig of a bottle of vodka.

He closed his eyes and leaned back, his head drooping over the couch. Tears suddenly sprang into his eyes and I saw his fearful expression as he started to cry.

"I'm sorry, Gavin. I'm so fucking sorry," Michael breathed.

Suddenly, his eyes blinked open and he got up from the couch. Staring at the gun, he reluctantly picked it up along with his keys, before he left the apartment.

The bright flash occurred again and I found myself standing on Lamar Boulevard Bridge (AN: It's actually a bridge in Austin. I did my research ;)). I swung my head around in the darkness, the only light coming from the moon.

When I looked up, I saw a dark figure standing on the railing to the bridge.

Curly red hair.

I dashed forward, thinking I'd be able to stop him before he jumped.

I didn't.

I watched as he lifted up the gun and press it against his temple. He squeezed his eyes shut before squeezing the trigger. A load gun shot went off and I watched as his figure collapsed backwards, towards the water.

He plummeted down into the icy water. I leaned over the railing to see a large splash. In the moonlight, I could see blood splattered on the pavement and bridge railing, without a doubt being Michael's.

Looking back down into the water, I counted thirty seconds, hoping, praying that he might submerge.

When it became apparent he wasn't going to resurface, I crouched down next to the railing and let the tears overwhelm me. If I committed suicide, Michael did too...

The bright flash happened again and I once again found myself in the dark room.

"When... When did he commit suicide..." I asked.

"May 23rd, 2016 at 9:24pm," The creeper told me.

My 29th birthday...

I was speechless. Michael would go as far as to commit suicide after I was gone. And on a day that was special to me.

All because of my own selfish acts.

Something pieced its way inside me. Like I finally fit the last piece in the puzzle.

Committing suicide would get me nowhere. All I would get in return is a place in Hell. My friends would slowly break apart. The one person I ever loved would take the same fate as me.

Depression was getting me nowhere too. We only got so many years on this earth and why should I spend all my waking moments sulking and feeling sorry for myself. I shouldn't. I wasted an entire year doing that because of things that happened in the past. Things that I got past. Life went on and I should be living it to the fullest. In the words of Ray, YOLO.

Suddenly the creeper shuttered and exploded.

And I woke up.
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Author's Note:
I've been working all morning on this. Your welcome xD.
Anyway, thanks for reading. I really hope you guys are enjoying this. Confusing part is hopefully gonna be over. Also, who's wondering what Michael was lying about? I will be revealing that in the next few chapters *wink wink*.
Also, I think this story is gonna have about fifteen chapters. I know, I frickin suck for writing a short story but I'm running out of ideas for this. I might make a sequel of this but I don't know yet.
Please leave some feedback on what I should do with this story. How your liking it, if you'd like a sequel, anything. I really appreciate it.
Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed!