Chapter Five:
Hospital

Michael's POV:

I packed up my stuff and waved to the remainder of the guys. I carried my stuff out to my car and got in, beginning the drive home.

I kinda felt bad about what I said to Gavin. He didn't mean to kiss me. Well, he did, but he was drunk.

When he asked to go home, I couldn't help but give him a sorry look without him noticing. I felt like it was my fault that he wanted to go home.

I looked to my left and saw Geoff's apartment surrounded by a police car and ambulance. I instantly became worried and pulled into the parking lot to see if everything was alright.

I got out of my car and started walking towards Geoff, Griffon, and Heidi. Heidi looked like she just saw a ghost while Griffon held onto her tightly. Geoff stroked his wife and child's hair to calm them.

I then saw the man on the stretcher.

My eyes widened when I saw Gavin. His eyes were closed and looked bruised. His neck had a variety of bruises around it. He looked so... Peaceful.

When I reached Geoff and the girls I gave them a confused and terrified look. Geoff broke away from his family and led me over to his car.

"Geoff, what the hell happened?" I asked frantically as Geoff started speeding to the hospital.

"Gavin... He... Tried to commit suicide again," Geoff told me.

Again?

"What? Why?" I asked, shocked. Gavin was always so happy... Why would he try to end his life?

"He... He has depression, Michael. A very serious case. He's tried killing himself five times now. I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried therapists but they never work. I still find things in his room that he uses to harm himself. He's so skinny... I don't think he eats. It's gotten to the point where I can't do anything anymore, Michael. Next time he tries... I'm not gonna try to stop him," Geoff said.

I nearly punched him.

"What! Geoff this is someone who is like a son to you! How could you even say that!" I growled at him, feeling my rage pick up.

"Michael, I don't know what to do anymore. He's just... lost the will to live altogether. And if he truly doesn't want to live anymore... Then why should we stop him?" Geoff asked me, tears streaming beginning to run down his face.

"Because we love him! Because he's Gavin fucking Free! Because without him... I'm... We're nothing!" I screamed at Geoff.

"Well, I've told him everything that would happen if he did succeed in killing himself. It never gets through his head," Geoff told me, pulling into the hospital parking lot.

"Then maybe someone else should tell him," I mumbled quietly.

"What do you mean?" Geoff asked curiously.

"Geoff... Gavin tried to kiss me a little while ago. I shoved him off and said some... Terrible things to him. I've kinda been avoiding him now and..." I trailed off there.

It was my fault Gavin did this. It was my fault he tried to end his life.

"Oh my god... It's my fault," I said, choking up.

"Michael, don't say that. It's nobody's fault directly. Or maybe it's everyone's fault, who knows? Don't think like that," Geoff reassured me but I just shook my head.

"No, this is my fault this time. And I'll be the one to take care of it," I told him boldly before getting out of the car.

...

We waited while Gavin's doctor did his thing to Gavin. I just hoped my boi was okay. Of course... Technically he isn't okay. Technically he's always suffering...

Okay stop thinking about that, Michael. Just focus on the task at hand.

I watched as the door opened and I looked up to see his doctor looking down at us.

"He cut off his oxygen for about five minutes, but it wasn't long enough to kill him. He'll be a little light headed for a while but he's alive," The doctor informed us. He allowed us to go in, which we did.

The moment I walked in, I saw my boi staring up at the ceiling. His eyes were full of tears but he didn't allow them to slide down his cheeks.
As we walked in, he didn't even acknowledge us. He just continued to look up at nothing.

After about five minutes, he finally spoke.

"Why did you stop me?" He croaked, his voice sounding raspy and a million miles away.

"Why wouldn't I?" Geoff asked calmly, using a gentle and loving voice.

"Michael, why are you here? You said you never wanted to speak to me again," Gavin asked me, still staring at the ceiling.

"I didn't mean it. I would never be able to go the rest of my life not speaking to you," I reassured him. He just sighed and stretched out his arms.

"Yeah. That's what they all say," Gavin said.

What? What was that supposed to mean?

I shrugged it off and looked at Geoff for a moment.

"Geoff, can I talk to Gavin alone, please," I asked him. Geoff nodded and walked out.

That was when I lost it.

The cool I was holding onto broke the moment Gavin turned his green gaze to mine. The pain and grief that I now saw in his eyes, the bitterness, the expression that I've been so blind too, was ever present in his once incredible green depths. It was like his eyes were picking me apart, trying to figure out what I was doing, who I truly was.

He looked at me like I was a stranger.

The tears pierced my eyes and fell from my eyes, to my cheeks, and to my lap. I just held his gaze with mine, not being able to look away.

"Why?" I croaked when I finally found my voice.

"It was easier. Easier than living this sad excuse of a life," Gavin whispered back.

"Do you hear yourself? Do you hear what you're saying? This isn't the Gavin I know. The Gavin I know is happy and jubilant. Stupid and excited all the time. Not a moment goes by that-," He cut me off.

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe, just maybe, that was all fake? To hide my true self from the rest of the world?" Gavin asked me, looking at me again.

I shook my head slightly, my mouth gaped open at what he was telling me. It was like the one person I thought I knew was taking off a mask and revealing who they really were. And it wasn't pretty.

"When? I mean, when did this happen?" I asked. I didn't have to elaborate more. He knew.

"About a year ago. Around the time you and Lindsay became serious about your relationship," Gavin muttered like it was a fact known by everyone.

"Why?" I asked him, slightly confused.

"Isn't it obvious?" Gavin's gaze pierced mine, waiting for me to understand.

I felt as stupid as him.

Gavin sighed and shook his head, knowing I wasn't following. He took a deep breath, clearly becoming exhausted from the lack of oxygen his system had.

"I love you, Michael. Ever since the moment I met you. I always have and always will," He whispered in the most emotionless voice I'd ever heard.

I just sat there, trying to comprehend what he was telling me. I always knew there was something up with Gavin and his sexuality. He denied every girl that took an interest in him. I remembered him nearly breaking Meg's heart when he said no to her offer of a date. Ray and I had joked that Gavin was heartless, but if I'd known that Gavin was actually doing it out of love for me, I probably would've sat down and talked to him about it.

"You... Love me?" I asked.

"Congratulations, Michael. You've found out my greatest secret," Gavin clapped his hands sarcastically, squinting his eyes in a strange glare that seemed foreign coming from him.

"You've loved me since the moment we met?" I asked him.

"Before that, actually. I watched some of the videos that RoosterTeeth posted long before I started working for them and I remember just thinking that you were the most adorable employee there," Gavin confessed, blushing slightly. I felt myself blush as well.

"Oh yeah? Well, what got to you then?" I asked, smirking slightly.

"The way your hair was like a ball of fire. It was so long back then. And your cute like spasms of rage, back when you couldn't rage so openly. Oh, and your smile. God, I remember just melting every time I saw your cute little smile," Gavin confessed, seemingly in his own world.

I couldn't help but feel flattered by what he said. Everyone used to say that when I started working at RoosterTeeth, I looked childish. It was nice to hear that someone actually thought it was cute.

"I actually love your accent," I blurted out.

What the fuck was that about?

Gavin let a small quick smirk show and turned his head away. Before I knew what was happening, I brought my hand up and pushed his head back towards me. I stood up and leaned down towards him.

And I kissed him.
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Author's Note:
I wouldn't be surprised if I was related to Gavin Free. It seems like I'm related to every frickin Gavin in the world. Like, no joke, half my family is named Gavin.
Anyway, thanks for reading! Really appreciate it! I'm really trying my best with this story. I'm in kinda a depressed and stressed out mood (like I have been for four years now) so my writing will probably reflect that. Thanks for all the comments on the last chapter! I know it's literally three and other stories get like a hundred per chapter but you guys put a smile on my face with those! Thank you so much! Anyway, please keep up the support and feedback! It means so much. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy!
P.S. Tell me if you want more of Michael's POV. If you do I'll put it in some more.