Are you sure you want to unblock the contact "Dickhead"?

Yes.

...

Shouto has created a new chat.

The chat has been renamed to "What The Hell Is Wrong With This Family?".

Fuyumi has been added.

Natsuo has been added.

Keigo has been added.

Izuku has been added.

Katsuki has been added.

...

Are you sure you want to proceed?

Yes.

...

Shouto has deleted the chat.

...

Are you sure you want to block the contact "Dickhead"?

Yes.

...

New Message.

Izuku: Shouto, this has been going on for months now

Izuku: Are you sure you're okay?

Izuku: Even Kacchan's worried about you

Izuku: Shouto???

Shouto: Sorry, Izuku.  I've just had a lot on my mind.

Izuku: I know.  But now that we're on winter break, don't you think we can resolve it with a nice warm cup of hot cocoa?

Shouto: That would be nice

Izuku: Okay!  I'll be at your dorm in a bit!  Love you, Sho <3

Shouto: Love you too, Zu

Izuku: Where's my heart </3

Shouto: Sorry <3

Izuku: Thank youuu <3

New Message.

Fuyumi: Hey Shouto!  I hope you're having a good break!  I just wanted to let you know that on Christmas, Natsuo and I are going to have a get together and we would like to invite you, Midoriya, and Bakugou!  And I promise, it's entirely Endeavor-free!

Shouto: Okay, I'll be there

New Message.

Katsuki: I'm not going to your dumb Christmas party

Katsuki: How many times do I gotta tell you that I'm not a part of your fucking family!?

Shouto: But Fuyumi said it was Endeavor-free

Katsuki: And?  The fuck's that got to do with anything!?

Shouto: It means that it's Endeavor-free and you should come

Katsuki: No, fuck off

Shouto: Yes

Katsuki: No

Shouto: Yes

Katsuki: No

Shouto: Yes

Katsuki: No

Shouto: Yes

Katsuki: No

Shouto: Fuyumi will give you the recipe to the Mapo Tofu

Katsuki: You're fucking annoying

Shouto: Is that a yes?

Read 11:09

Fuyumi has created a new chat.

Micro Penis has been added.

Natsuo has been added.

Keigo has been added.

Izuku has been added.

Katsuki has been added.

Your Mom has been added.

Fuyumi: Here we can discuss what to get Mom for Christmas

Micro Penis: Why would you add mom then 🧍‍♂️

Natsuo: That's not Mom, that's YOUR MOM

Micro Penis: Is that not the same thing

Natsuo: Of course not

Micro Penis: Am I... adopted...?

Natsuo: Yes Shouto, sorry that you had to find out this way.  I know it must be hard

Micro Penis: At least now I know Endeavor's not my biological father

Natsuo: Nah, he just so happens to be your sperm donner

Fuyumi: Natsu, shut up

Natsuo: But he doesn't get the your mom joke 😐

Micro Penis: What the fuck's a your mom joke

Natsuo: Your mom

Micro Penis: WHAT ABOUT HER???

Your Mom: You called???

Natsuo: Omg look it's your mom, say hi

Micro Penis: Hi??

Your Mom: Hey dumbshit ;333

Natsuo: Your mom, be nicer to your son

Your Mom: You gonna pay me?  I could really use a car, after all, my husband seems to not wanna fly me places even though he literally has the luxury to do so

Micro Penis: Is your husband a pilot?

Your Mom: Um yes

Micro Penis: What's his name?

Your Mom: Your Dad

Micro Penis: My dad's your husband?

Your Mom: No, YOUR DAD'S my husband

Micro Penis: YES I UNDERSTAND THAT BUT ENDEAVOR SEEMS TO HAVE A WIFE ALREADY

Your Mom: WHO SAID IT WAS ENDEAVOR???

Micro Penis: NATSUO JUST SAID HE WAS MY DAD

Your Mom: THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING

Micro Penis: YES IT FUCKING DOES

Natsuo: HEY, CAN YOU GUYS KEEP IT DOWN PLEASE 👺👺👺

Micro Penis: BUT WHO THE FUCK IS THIS

Your Mom: I COULD ASK THE SAME THING TO YOU UNDER THE NAME "Micro Penis"

Micro Penis: MY NAME IS SAVED AS MICRO PENIS???

Your Mom: WITH AN ATTITUDE LIKE THAT YOU PROBABLY HAVE ONE TOO

Micro Penis: WHATEVER YOU SAY BABY DICK

Your Mom: CALL ME BABY DICK ONE MORE TIME I FUCKING DARE YOU

Micro Penis: BABY

Micro Penis: DICK

Your Mom: THAT'S IT, ARSON TIME

Keigo: Ladies, calm yourselves.  You're not yourself when you're hungry, have some fried chicken

Natsuo: You're the type of person to eat the kitkat without breaking it, aren't you?

Keigo: What does that have to do with anything????

Natsuo: That explains a lot

Your Mom: oi, Yumi, Micro Penis stinks like the shit I just took, kick him off

Izuku: Don't talk about Micro Penis like that, it's not nice 😤

Micro Penis: Debating whether or not you're joking

Izuku: It's okay Micro Penis, I'll protect you from Your Mom <3

Micro Penis: Oh yeah he definitely knows what he's doing

Izuku: My heart?

Micro Penis: What about your heart

Izuku: Where's my heart >:(

Micro Penis: As always, you're incompetent <3

Izuku: Better <3

Your Mom: Oi, Micro Penis, stop flirting with the broccoli, he has two boyfriends already

Katsuki has silenced the chat.

Micro Penis: But I am his boyfriend

Your Mom: Damn how many dicks are you getting, broccoli boy?

Izuku: One?

Your Mom: Sure you are

Izuku: ????

Your Mom: But why would you chose Micro Penis over here?  Isn't Shouto bad enough?

Izuku: ????????????

Micro Penis: Says baby dick

Micro Penis: How'd you get a husband anyway you can't even please him

Your Mom: I DON'T HAVE A BABY DICK AND I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT KEIGO IS VERY SATISFIED WITH ME IN BED

Micro Penis: AND YOU'RE HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH THE NUMBER 2 HERO???

Your Mom: NO I JUST SAID HE'S MY HUSBAND

Natsuo: Oh, so they are that stupid

Fuyumi: At this point, I'm not even surprised

Micro Penis: WHY WOULD HE HAVE TWO HUSBANDS??

Your Mom: FIRST OF ALL, UZUI HAS THREE WIVES SO WHY NOT

Micro Penis: It's a CLAN PRACTICE

Your Mom: SECOND OF ALL WHO IS THIS OTHER HUSBAND

Micro Penis: MY BITCH OF A BROTHER TOUYA TODOROKI

Your Mom: I KNOW BUT WHO ELSE??

Micro Penis: I JUST SAID WHO ELSE

Your Mom: NO YOU DIDN'T

Micro Penis: YES I DID

Natsuo: OMG Y'ALL ARE FUCKING STUPID

Natsuo: 

Natsuo:

Micro Penis: I don't get it

Your Mom: 

Fuyumi: Yeah I quit

Miro Penis: Also why am I labeled as Micro Penis I clearly don't have one

Your Mom: HAHAHAHAH LOSER

Your Mom: 

Micro Penis:

Katsuki has unmuted the chat.

Katsuki: Fucking dumbasses

Katsuki: I'm only doing this for the Tofu recipe

Katsuki has changed Micro Penis's name to Shouto.

Katsuki has changed Your Mom's name to Touya.

Touya: Ah that explains why he has a Micro Penis

Shouto: I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND THE MEANING BEHIND YOUR MOM

Touya: Well maybe if you had a fat cock like me you'd understand

Shouto: Well maybe if you weren't a fucking dickhead then maybe you'd actually have a fat cock like you say you do

Touya: You don't have the authority to be talking about MY cock

Shouto: AND YOU'RE NOT AUTHORIZED TO TALK TO ME

Touya: WELL FINE THEN I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU ANYWAY

Shouto: ME NEITHER

Fuyumi: Hey!  You're gonna talk to each other whether you like it or not!

Shouto: Um no...?

Fuyumi: Um YES

Touya: Wait hold on

Touya: Don't tell me that this bitch was invited to that dumb Christmas party too

Fuyumi: Of course he was, he's a Todoroki too

Touya: Well, I'm no longer going

Shouto: I also will no longer attend

Fuyumi: You both are going whether you like it or not.

Touya: Oh yeah?  But I'm older and I say no

Fuyumi: Well you've been gone from the house for 10 years, so by default you get no authority over me

Touya: Says who?

Fuyumi: Your mom

Natsuo: AYOOO SHE MADE A YOUR MOM JOKE

Natsuo: GIVE ME UP FIVE FOR THAT ONE

Fuyumi: 

Natsuo: Yumi actually complied 😭

Fuyumi: Yeah because you're not being a pain in the ass today

Natsuo: Yes bc I'd never be a pain in the ass to Yumi 😌

Fuyumi: The keyword was today

Natsuo: Oh

Natsuo: Anyway

Natsuo: I think you both should go, I mean you guys used to get a long

Shouto: That was before baby dick ruined it

Touya: We'll maybe if you weren't born we wouldn't be having this problem 😤

Shouto: Well I wouldn't have been born if you weren't a failure

Touya: 😃

Natsuo: That's taking it way too far, Shouto

Touya: You look like a fucking clown right now

Shouto: Alright Mr. "My body can't even handle my own quirk"

Natsuo: Dude stop gassing on him

Shouto: If he didn't want to be gassed then maybe he shouldn't have come back.  I'm tired of listening to his stupid ass words and anything for that manner.  Just get him away from me, I don't need him in my life, so stop trying.

Izuku: Shouto... I know you don't mean that.  You spent months thinking about Touya, and you always looked sad when he was brought up.  Hell, we even had a little "Cocoa Time With Zu" to talk about it

Touya: Ayo the fuck is "Cocoa Time With Zu"??? 🤨

Shouto: 😐

Izuku: 😐

Touya: Yk what forget I asked 😐

Izuku: Well anyway, we sat down and talked it over.  I don't understand, what's with the change of heart?

Shouto: I can't fucking stand him.  And yet... I miss him.

Shouto: And it's fucking painful.

Touya: Well then fucking show it bc I definitely don't feel missed

Shouto: Would you rather me put up a fucking poster that says "I MISS YOU SO MUCH TOUYA ILY 😩😩😩"

Touya: Well yeah

Shouto: Yeah no

Touya: Fuck you

Shouto: Fuck you too

Keigo: Hey, don't you have something to say too?

Touya: Me?  No

Touya: I never do

Shouto: That's coming from the man who managed to always find something to say

Touya: SHUT your bitch ass UP

Keigo: So you weren't crying everyday after the whole drama, right??

Touya: Who let you expose me 🧍‍♀️

Keigo: Your husband???

Touya: Oh shit that's right 😐

Touya: Shouto I regret ever talking to you 🙄

Keigo: Touya that's not what we agreed on

Touya: Yes it was

Keigo: Fine, I guess I'm focusing on nothing but Yakitori for 2 months

Touya: Not even my Yakitori???

Keigo: Nope, just me and my big juicy Yakitori

Touya: Oh god I think I'm falling in love all over again

Shouto: Y'all are nasty 😐

Touya: Alright "Cocoa Time With Zu" 🙄

Shouto: You keep our Cocoa time out of this

Touya: Yeah sure whatever you want

Touya: Anyway, Shouto I regret ever talking to you in such a rude manner, and I would like to apologize for my actions 

Shouto: Why does that sound way too formal for either of you

Touya: We thought you liked formalities

Shouto: It doesn't sound like you

Touya: ugh fine I fucking miss you, just fucking talk to me you dumb shit

Touya: Bc I DON'T WANT A LOT FOR CHRISTMAS

Touya: THERE IS JUST ONE TJING I NEED

Touya: I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE PRESENTS UNDERNEATH THE CHRISTMAS TREE 

Touya: I JUST WANT YOU FOR MY OWN

Touya: MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER KNOW

Touya: MAKE MY WISH COME TRUE

Touya: ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOUUUUU

Natsuo: Ayo 🤨

Shouto: 🙄 obnoxious as ever

Shouto: But I'll take it

Touya: Does this mean you forgive me 🥺

Shouto: No.  But I will talk to you normally

Touya: Damn Ig I should take what I can get

The chat has been renamed to "What The Hell Is Wrong With This Family?"

Touya: I love you guys

Shouto: I love Izuku

Natsuo: I love your Mom 😏

Touya: AYO 🤨📸

Natsuo: Anyway I'll see you guys at the Christmas party!  Thank you for actually talking about it

Fuyumi: Yes, and I couldn't have done it without you, Natsuo, or Katsuki, or Izuku, or Keigo.

Fuyumi: We may not be healed completely, but you guys make the family feel whole

Fuyumi: Merry Christmas

Izuku: Merry Christmas, Fuyumi!

Katsuki: I'm still only going for the Tofu

Izuku: Liar~

Katsuki: SHUT UP

And so, the Todoroki family enjoyed their festivities, and made the most of the season.

They snuggled by the fire and drank loads of hot cocoa, all the while watching the Jim Carey and his performance of the Grinch.

Touya and Shouto got along more than ever, and oh dear, who pushed them under the mistletoe??

I can't rhyme, so why try?  But hell, did they have fun.

Merry Christmas to all, and bid the Todoroki Family a long farewell.

THE END.