Shouto: 3 days

Shouto: 3 FUCKING DAYS

Natsuo: What?

Shouto: It's been 3 fucking days since Touya was deleted wtf

Shouto: He hasn't thrown a brick at my window

Shouto: He hasn't talked about watching Frozen with Hawks

Shouto: He hasn't been taunting Izuku and I about fucking

Shouto: He hasn't been making dick jokes

Shouto: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

Natsuo: It sounds like someone's got the case of "I miss my older brother, I want him back 🥺"

Shouto: I don't FUCKING MISS TOUYA, HE WAS AN ASS

Izuku: Smh why tf you lying </3

Shouto: I—

Izuku: I saw you moping yesterday because you were bored not being able to yell at him

Shouto: What are you talking about?  That obviously didn't happen

Izuku: Says the one who was laying on my lap yesterday making sad faces the whole time whenever you got a notification that wasn't from him

Shouto: That's not what happened

Shouto: You said you wouldn't give me attention because I forgot to bring you your other shoe earlier, that's why I was frowning

Izuku: And Ashido and Kaminari were texting you and you frowned more when you saw who it was from

Izuku: Because you miss Touya

Shouto: NUH UH

Izuku: YUH HUH

Shouto: Look, I can easily just replace him

Shouto: Watch

Shouto: Natsuo, be Touya for me

Natsuo: AY BET

Natsuo has changed his name to The Cooler Touya.

The Cooler Touya: Dick

Shouto: See, it's like he was never gone

Izuku: uhuh...

Fuyumi: I'm starting to think all of you are stupid

The Cooler Touya: Yeah, you're right

The Cooler Touya: Especially Shouto

Shouto: See, he even does the crappy insults correctly

The Cooler Touya: You're damn right, I'm doing my fucking job correctly

The Cooler Touya: The only thing I won't do is flirt with Hawks, because I ain't trying to mess up Touya's relationship here

Shouto: Get you a brother as awesome as Natsuo

The Cooler Touya: Stfu I'm Touya now 

Shouto: Ah

Shouto: My mistake

Shouto: Touya

Keigo: Yeah this is nice and all, but I just want you guys to know that Touya hasn't shown up in 3 days and I'm worried as fuck ;-;

Izuku: Huh???  Wait wdym?

Keigo: After he got "deleted" he hasn't been around

Shouto: I only poured water on him

Shouto: It's not like I erased him from existence

Shouto: If I did, there goes an entire plot down the drain

The Cooler Touya: Don't talk about plot here, the fourth wall is broken as it is you inbred

Keigo: But he's gone, and usually he only leaves me alone when he's doing something illegal

Shouto: ...Not like it's your job to stop that but okay

Keigo: It's just so sad

Keigo: I miss the Yakitori

Keigo: The cuddles

Keigo: The kisses

Keigo: And let's not forget my favorite of them all

Shouto: You better not fucking say it

Keigo: The Frozen sessions 😔

Shouto: Ugh

Shouto: This is so sad, Touya, play Despacito

Izuku: Shouto!  Don't be mean to Hawks like that >:(

Shouto: You're not my father

Izuku: But I can be your daddy ;)

The Cooler Touya: ...

The Cooler Touya: I was never here

Shouto: No.

Izuku: Hmph >:T

Izuku: Look, all I'm saying is that we should try and help Hawks

Shouto: But I don't feel sorry

Izuku: Shouto

Shouto: No

Izuku: Shouto.

Shouto: No

Izuku: Shouto Todoroki.

Shouto: Oh so it's gonna be like that

Izuku: Yeah.

Shouto: Izuku, be reasonable here

Izuku: No.  Now you get no cuddles for a week.

Shouto: THAT'S BULLSHIT

Izuku: You know what's also bullshit?

Shouto: ughhhhh what

Izuku: That you won't help Hawks.

Shouto: That doesn't mean you have to revoke my cuddle privileges

Izuku: Fine then.

Izuku: No kisses for a month.

Shouto: KISSES!?

Shouto: FOR A MONTH!?

Izuku: Yeah.

Shouto: You're so fucking mean, what did I ever do, all I did was love you and now I get this

Izuku: Shouto Todoroki, all you have to do is help Hawks.  It's as simple as that.

Shouto: You fucker, these rules suck

Izuku: You're just saying that because they're not in your favor.

Shouto: Well... DUH

Izuku: You whine too much.

Shouto: You love me

Izuku: Yeah, I do... <3

Shouto: I love you too <3

Shouto: So anyway, back to the topic at hand

Shouto: Can I have my kissing privileges back

Izuku: No!

Izuku: Not until you help Hawks with our Touya issue!

Shouto: Fuck I thought that would work

Izuku: You're so stupid 🙄

Shouto: A N D  Y O U ' R E  P E R F E C T

Izuku: Are you trying to win me over by complimenting me?

Shouto: Yes

Izuku: Well it's not working

Shouto: You're troublesome

The Cooler Touya: CAN YOU GUYS STOP BEING SO FUCKING ADORABLE BEFORE I FUCKING DIE

Keigo: I'd also like to make a complaint

Shouto: What is it this time 🙄

Izuku: If you don't stop that, I will bite you

Shouto: Kinky

Izuku: I—

The Cooler Touya: And you say that you're nothing like Touya

Shouto: Ofc I'm not

The Cooler Touya: Dumbass

Izuku: Shouto, stop getting sidetracked, help Hawks or else we're not sleeping in the same bed tonight

Shouto: F U C K

Shouto: F I N E

Shouto: Hawks

Shouto: Where was the last place you say Touya?

Fuyumi: Are we just gonna ignore the fact that they sleep in the same bed?

The Cooler Touya: And I perfectly condone it

The Cooler Touya: I hope Shouto's getting the most outta that ass

Shouto: SHUT THE FUCK UP

Izuku: Oh yeah, don't worry, he does

Shouto: YOU ARE GOING TO BE THE END TO ME

Shouto has left the chat.

Shouto has re-joined the chat.

Shouto: Fuck you, I can't leave because of you

Izuku: Mhm that's what I thought 😊

The Cooler Touya: So y'all fucked, right?

Shouto: If I admitted it, would Touya be informed

The Cooler Touya: Well I mean, if it just so happens to slip out...

Shouto: Then no

The Cooler Touya: sigh

Shouto: Anyway, Hawks

Keigo: Yeah?

Shouto: Where was the last place you saw Touya?

Keigo: Well we were at the top of Tōjinbō, listening to the water, looking off at the sea

Keigo: Then he said, something along the lines of "Shouto's a little bitch.  I'm gonna put a fish in his bed"

Shouto: Of course he did 😑

Keigo: So then he told me to go get some Yakitori for us since we were gonna be staying there for a while

Keigo: So I flew home and came back and he was gone

Keigo: It's fucking heartbreaking 😭😭😭

Shouto: I think I know where he is

Fuyumi: What the fuck is that screaming

Touya has been added.

Touya: YOUR FATASS JUST CRUSHED ME

Shouto: That's what you get for being under my bed

Touya: I HAD THE PERFECT PLAN SET IN MOTION, I HATE YOU

Shouto: You're annoying

Touya: AND YOU'RE A BITCH

The Cooler Touya: Ah here we are, back to normal

Touya: AND JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!?

The Cooler Touya: The Cooler Touya

The Cooler Touya: Smh can't you read?

Touya: I— Natsu, the fuck're you doing

The Cooler Touya: I'm TOUYA stfu

Shouto: What the fuck's going on

The Cooler Touya: This

The Cooler Touya: