We drove in silence for hours. The only noise came from the hum of the highway and the occasional slosh from Finn. I should have been mourning Sarah, my Sarah. The full-of-life, driven, funny woman I fell in love with, but instead, my mind sat in the distance between Millie and me. I needed to prepare her for so many things, but she was so far from me that I didn't know how to begin to bridge the gap.

"Do you want to drive?" I started.

"Huh?"

"I always drive, but I never asked if you want to; would you like to drive?"

"Oh, no," she absently spoke, "I like being able to let my mind drift."

"Okay," my murmur was lost in the highway noise. "But you should sometimes drive to get used to the car."

"Are you okay?" Burst from her like water finally breaking through a dam.

"Yeah, I think so. Are you okay?"

"Me? I'm fine," her tone came with a surprise.

"I'm sorry I put you in that position, and I'm sorry you had to see me like that."

"See you like what?"

"I'm a monster, Mil. I killed Sarah."

"You didn't kill Sarah, not your Sarah. As you said, you killed a monster and saved countless lives. You certainly saved mine."

"Don't do that," I shot as annoyance at her for feigning my defense coursed through me.

"Don't do what?"

"Act like you can defend me. I can tell you are scared."

"I am scared. Look around, Seth. I would have to be insane not to be scared."

"You can have the car, guns, everything..."

"What?" She shot up in her seat.

"You can just take it and move on. I don't want you to be forced to be around me when I scare you."

"I'm not scared of you." From her tone, I expected a laugh to slip from her lips; Sarah would have laughed at me.

"Then what are you scared of?"

"Seth, we are surrounded by mindless brain-eating zombies, and I am also aware of ruthless conscious zombies, plus there's..." She cut herself off.

"There's what?"

"Seth, the scariest part of the past twenty-four hours was the look in the motel clerk's eyes when he looked out at you."

Kissing me was the scariest part of her day. At least she showed some sense; what healthy human would want to kiss a zombie even if it were part of a plan?

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"What are you sorry for now?" Annoyance filled Millie.

"That I scared you. That the kiss..."

"The kiss? Have you lost your damn mind?"

"Um, well..."

"Seth, the kiss isn't what scared me. I was afraid he would kill you. I was afraid..."

"What? Mil, he can't kill me. I am already dead."

"You are not dead. Will you stop saying that? You are right here next to me, talking, thinking, feeling. You are as alive as I am!"

"Really?"

"So, you are a zombie; that doesn't mean you have no soul. That doesn't mean you don't deserve a life."

"That is exactly what it means. I am a monster. People run from me; people should run from me."

"So, what? You just give up. Wait for someone to put a bullet in your head?"

"Yeah, something like that," I offered, except I knew where the bullet would come from; it had always been my plan. Once I found Sarah, I would rest.

"And you can't think of any reason that sticking around is a good idea? No one to hang around for?"

"No, all I do is make everything worse and put people in danger. Avi's dead, Sarah's dead. I am a monster."

"I take everything back; you are an idiot." Millie sighed as she returned her gaze back to the window.

The silence returned between us as I scrambled for where I had gone wrong.

"Millie," I tentatively spoke.

"Seth," she shot at me cooly.

"I'm sorry I pulled you into this; as I said, you can take the car and gun. It's safer for you that way."

"Fine," her voice was still stern. "I want Skittles, too," she added.

"His name is Finn," I corrected.

"Not now that he is mine," she volleyed.

"Fine," I agreed. As usual, Millie was correct; it didn't matter what she called him when I was gone.

I pulled off the highway at the next exit and came to a stop in a gas station. We both sat in silence, staring out the front window for a long time.

"Seth," Millie started, but her words fell out.

"It's a good car; it should get you to where ever you want to go. There is extra fish food in the trunk, bullets too." I pulled my gun out from beneath my seat and popped open the chamber. "You can have these too," I added.

"What are you going to do with an unloaded gun?" She asked incredulously.

"It's not empty; I kept a bullet."

"Oh, my bad. One bullet; one bullet is not enough to protect you."

"It's fine, Mil. I'll be fine. You need them more than I do."

"You are a ridiculous human being..."

"I am not a human being," I cut her off loudly.

She shifted away from me, "great, I don't think everyone in the parking lot heard you."

Instinctively we both shot glances around, but everyone was too busy with themselves even to notice us.

"You should at least take a box of bullets. You are in just as much danger as I am," Millie countered.

"What am I going to do, shoot a healthy human trying to protect themself?"

"Well, what are you going to do with one bullet?" She argued back.

I felt myself recoil at the plan. My wince immediately struck Millie.

"Seth, what are you going to do with one bullet?" Her voice rose in denial.

"Mil," I tried to quell her rising temperature with my tone.

"Do not Mil me. What are you going to do with one bullet?"

"I am going to correct what should have happened last Spring."

"Like hell you are!"

"Millie, none of this is right; it's unnatural."

"You're unnatural," she childishly shot.

"I know, that's what I just said."

"No, Seth; I won't let you leave."

"You can't make me stay. I'm faster, stronger; I could be gone before you even knew it."

"You may be faster and stronger, but I won't let you leave."

"Yeah, how exactly do you plan to make me stay?"

"I need you," she said, meeting my eyes.

"What?"

"I need you. I need you with me to protect me."

"You don't need me to protect you," a laugh slipped from my lips as the most self-sufficient woman I had ever laid eyes on claimed she needed protection.

"You have saved my ass at least three times; I need you." She was beginning to sound like a broken record.

"Barring the first time, every other time I have saved your life was because I put you in danger. I am not good to be around, and you certainly don't need me."

"Seth," the anger still permeated her voice, but she tried to stifle it with a heavy gulp. "You are very stupid, so I am going to talk very slow."

"Nice, Mil," I sighed and leaned into my are door as the window controls bit into the small of my back.

"Seth," she grasped my hand. "I do need you."

"Millie..."

But she cut me off with, "I can't talk any slower; I need you, Seth."

"Why in the hell that we are currently living would you need me?"

"Are you this dense?"

"I've almost gotten you killed twice now. I did get Avi killed. You do not need me. No one needs me."

"Ugh, you are so annoying," she protested, causing me to meet her gaze.

"I'm annoying; you are so..."

But she didn't cut me off with words this time. She ricocheted her body from her side of the bench seat and crashed into me. Her hand reached me first, grasping at my leather jacket and t-shirt for stability. Then her lips met mine. It happened so fast that my body reacted before my mind. My arms curled around her waist, offering her additional stability as my lips melted to hers. Before my mind could thaw to what was happening, my hand lifted to her neck, pulling her closer to me.

Then, all at once, the flood of my mind doused me in cold water. "Millie," I managed without entirely pulling away.

"Mmhmm," she murmured as she sunk further into me.

"Hey," I soothed as I pulled my face from her and swiped a few loose hairs from her face. "Did someone see us?"

"What? Who cares?" Her brow furrowed as she sunk a few inches away from me.

"Why did you...?"

"Are you fucking kidding me, Seth?"

"What?" I looked around for the threat that we were trying to trick.

"That wasn't a cover."