"Well, have you tried just talking to her?" Matt asked.

"I haven't had the chance. Plus it seems like every time I try to tell her, something else has happened that she hates me for," Wes replied

"I don't know about hate," said Matt. Attempting to give support to his friend.

"If it's not hate, I'm not sure what hate is." Despite Matt's efforts, Wes was still rather depressed with the situation.

"Hum, I'd call it dislike with a passion," said Matt before amending "a strong passion."

"Dude that's the same thing as hate," Wes countered with a shadow of a smirk.

"I guess it kinda is," said Matt. He stayed silent for a moment before remembering that he was trying to cheer Wes up. "It could be worse," He offered.

"Yeah? How could it be worse?" said Wes with a skeptical, raised eyebrow.

Matt hadn't thought that part out yet, so he waited a while before finding a response.

"Oh, she knows you exist! That's gotta be a positive right?" said Matt with excitement, proud to have thought of something.

"Great. I feel much better now," said Wes.

Both boys sat in silence on exposed roots, lost in their thoughts, before Matt spoke again.

"Maybe we're better off without girls," he said.

"How do you mean?"

"Well, we spend all of our time thinking about them, trying to understand them, heck even dreaming about them...and in the end, they just turn on you and break your heart, and give you a parting black eye with that well-aimed left hook."

Wes thought for a minute. He knew Matt was talking about Julia. For the past three years, he had asked her out a total of 112 times and counting. Each time she had responded with a definite "No," and often some necessary defensive measure.

Granted, Matt did come on- well a bit strong- and he had absolutely no tact... But in his defense, he was totally whipped, and still maintains that she is his "soul mate" and they are destined to be together, and a bunch of other 'stuff' that was far too mushy for Wes to even rethink. The poor guy had it bad.

"What are you suggesting? Playing hard to get?" Wes asked.

"No the whole apple!"

When Wes just raised an eyebrow, Matt clarified.

"I'm talking about a Vow of Chastity!"

Wes couldn't help but laugh at the thought. "What's that gonna prove? Everyone already knows that we're total wankers."

"Which is why we have to give it up. It's the ultimate sacrifice to prove our love." Matt answered as if this should be obvious.

Wesley let out a snort of laughter, he knew Matt was a hopeless romantic, but he never dreamed he had it this bad.

"Oh you're laughing now but just you wait when I get my girl and you're left to grovel."

"And that statement is supported by your impeccable track record?" Wes mocked.

"Oh don't be jealous. I know not everyone is as skilled when it comes to professing their innermost feelings," said Matt. He paused to let Wes think it over. "It's not like you have a choice in the matter," he continued when Wes held his silence.

"How do you figure?"

"Well, you need my approval to be with her."

"What! I've been your best mate for four years now, and I still need 'approval?' You should be relieved."

"Aww, if only. But I know you better." Matt said with a wink.

"Sure you do," Wes muttered darkly.

"Come on it'll be fun. Every young man has to participate in a Vow of Chastity sometime in his life! It's like a rite of passage."

"Stop that."

"Stop what?" said Matt.

"Stop saying 'Vow of Chastity' like it's got capital letters, it sounds like you're announcing the next welterweight boxing champion of the world," Wes clarified.

"Vow of Chas-"

"Oh, cut it out already. Someone might hear," said Wes, fidgeting with his hands and glancing at the nearest trees. "So what does this vow entail exactly?"

"oh, you know, the usual, no wanking, snogging, self-indulgence..."

"No 'self-indulgence!' Come on man. Surely you of all people know that sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands." Wes wasn't sure if he meant that in the literal or figurative sense.

"Nope, no self-indulgence!" Matt stated in a final manner.

"And how about drooling? Is that allowed?" Wes was sarcastic, but Matt didn't seem to catch that.

"No, no, drooling is permitted, it's not like we can avoid that in any case," said Matt. "You're not afraid of losing are you?"

Wes seemed to find amusement in that idea. "Heck no, I wouldn't lose to you at any rate."

"Great it's a deal! We'll start on Saturday when the gang gets here. Maybe some of the other guys will want in too."

Sure they will, thought Wes.

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